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President-elect Donald Trump, man of the people, held an event this week pitching his DC hotel to foreign diplomats.

I mean. I just. I don’t …

WHERE THE HELL DO WE START???

Let’s let the Washington Post, which has been indispensable this year, unlike a certain all-the-news-without-fear-or-favor other outlet, that shall remain ARE YOU KIDDING ME JESUS CHRIST, do the heavy lifting:

In interviews with a dozen diplomats, many of whom declined to be named because they were not authorized to speak about anything related to the next U.S. president, some said spending money at Trump’s hotel is an easy, friendly gesture to the new president.

“Why wouldn’t I stay at his hotel blocks from the White House, so I can tell the new president, ‘I love your new hotel!’ Isn’t it rude to come to his city and say, ‘I am staying at your competitor?’ ” said one Asian diplomat.

Dude’s right. The way to Donald Trump’s heart is through his wallet. This is not even a question. So, will our president-elect shake down all the foreigns? Oh hell yeah. He will win so much, he will get tired of winning.

Oh, look at this adorable Mexican guy with his “good government” hilarity:

“The temptation and the inclination will certainly be there,” said Arturo Sarukhan, a former Mexican ambassador to the United States. “Some might think it’s the right way to engage, to be able to tell the next president, ‘Oh, I stayed at your hotel.’ If I were still in government, I would discourage it, among other reasons because it can be questioned and looked at in a very poor light, as though you are trying to buy influence via a hotel bill.”

LOL he’s sweet. But are there questions of ethics? Maaaaybe, but also maybe not!

The Trumps opened the hotel in the Old Post Office pavilion, a 117-year-old property the company leases from the federal government. Officials at the General Services Administration, the landlord, have consulted the Office of Government Ethics about how to handle such conflicts, but the measures preventing other federal employees from profiting from their positions do not apply to the president.

“but the measures preventing other federal employees from profiting from their positions do not apply to the president.”

“but the measures preventing other federal employees from profiting from their positions do not apply to the president.”

“BUT THE MEASURES PREVENTING OTHER FEDERAL EMPLOYEES FROM PROFITING FROM THEIR POSITIONS DO NOT APPLY TO THE PRESIDENT.”

Vision going wobbly. Everything turning to black.

[FAINTS, LANDS IN A COMA, EMERGES IN 42 YEARS ALREADY DEAD, IT’S A HAPPY ENDING HOORAY!]

[WaPo]

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