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Whining.
Whining.

The thin-skinned, spray-tanned Twitter monster known as Donald Trump has had it UP TO HERE! with everybody picking on him for being dumb and bad and racist and gropey and the worst. Continuing his downwardly spiraling campaign, he has now sent out a press release, to the #rigged press, saying he is going to punish the press by “break[ing] up the new media conglomerate oligopolies.” Big words for a man with such tiny hands! Let’s take a look at this dumb thing, signed by Peter Navarro, senior economic adviser to Trump:

Donald Trump will break up the new media conglomerate oligopolies that have gained enormous control over our information, intrude into our personal lives, and in this election, are attempting to unduly influence America’s political process.

“The very corporations that have gained from shipping America’s factories and jobs offshore are the very same media conglomerates now pushing Hillary Clinton’s agenda. She is the official candidate of the multinational ruling elite.

“NBC, and its Clinton megaphone MSNBC, were once owned by General Electric, a leader in offshoring factories to China. Now NBC has been bought by Comcast, which is specifically targeting the Chinese market – even as Comcast’s anchors and reporters at MSNBC engage in their Never Trump tactics.

“AT&T, the original and abusive ‘Ma Bell’ telephone monopoly, is now trying to buy Time Warner and thus the wildly anti-Trump CNN. Donald Trump would never approve such a deal because it concentrates too much power in the hands of the too and powerful few.

“The New York Times strings are being pulled by Mexico’s Carlos Slim, a billionaire who benefits from NAFTA and supports Hillary Clinton’s open border policies. Amazon, which controls the Washington Post, profits from the flow of illegally subsidized foreign products through its distribution channels. Lower costs mean higher margins — no matter if bad trade deals lead to massive unemployment in America.

Gosh! Everybody is #inthetank for Hillary Clinton, and G.E. and AT&T and this one Mexican billionaire guy are in a conspiracy together to make Trump look like A Idiot. Weird!

Of course, we all remember how Trump famously said this year that when he is president — here’s your link to Nate Silver’s election forecast, if you want to LOL at the notion of Trump becoming president — he wants to “open up the libel laws” to make it so people can’t make fun of him or hurt his feelings in print. How sad it must be to have such low self esteem and be a weak loser like Donald Trump!

Speaking of media companies doing Benghazi to poor Donald Trump’s feelings, did everyone see Monday’s New York Times?

nyt

Gosh, we guess the Times wasn’t intimidated by Trump’s whiny ass threatening to sue them for “libel,” as if Trump even has a reputation to uphold.

Anyway, in the print edition, it covers TWO WHOLE PAGES. That mean Mexican billionaire Carlos Slim — who has got to be feeling so strange, knowing that for no particular reason, Donald Trump is terrified of him — is teasing Trump again! You can click here to read through it yourself, as it is exhaustive. Not only does it feature all the times Trump has insulted Hillary Clinton on Twitter, but it also includes other fun things, like when he cries about reporters and insults microphones that make him sound like a coke addict. Microphones is #RIGGED!

Anyway, none of this will happen when Trump is president, because Trump’s Ministry Of Truth will make it against the law to hurt the pencil-dicked dictator’s feelings, and all the TV stations will automatically redirect to Trump TV, which will be our state-run media, just like Trump’s BFF Vladimir Putin has in Mother Russia. Won’t that be great?

[Donald Trump’s website / New York Times]

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  • SuspectedDemocrat

    Trump does too have a reputation to uphold! How would it look if he all of the sudden stopped suing everybody and her grandmother? Certain libelous media conglomerates might use that to imply that he was beaten by a woman, or worse – he can’t assault women with impunity. He would suffer a substantial loss in both brand value and quality of life.

  • Blackest Noobs

    awesome NYT!

    • Hope they gave hazard pay to the intern they made complie the list

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        If the they didn’t include themselves in that list already, I will expect an update after the next 3AM tweeting cycle.

  • Nounverb911

    “Donald Trump will break up the new media conglomerate oligopolies that have gained enormous control over our information”
    and give all that power to putin trump tv?

    • baconzgood

      Privatize kindergarten and make the media a public works.

  • KMTBERRY

    GROSS now I agree with The Great Pumpkin on a thing- I think the big media conglomerates SHOULD be broken up!

  • Jenny, Manocidal Vagendiac

    While I think our media needs to change and yes not be owned by like 4 entities, dumb ass dictator wannabe Drumph isn’t the guy to do it.

  • jesuswasablack

    Gee Carlos doesn’t look very slim to me? Poor Donald all those companies off-shoring business just like Trump, when will he file suit against himself?
    https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9AQr1hIukO0/hqdefault.jpg

    • Bad Hombre Ron

      He has teams of investigators looking into himself. They’ll be reporting back with shocking news any day now.

  • Jenny, Manocidal Vagendiac

    Also Anthony Weiner is the worst for ruining the name Carlos.

  • Nounverb911

    “NBC, and its Clinton megaphone MSNBC, were once owned by General Electric, a leader in offshoring factories to China.”

    Conveniently located next door to the Trump tie factory.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7b4b3dfe976ed30eb7e8edb656780dd67032c37aa2bb0220dbd1b4b7d6d503ba.jpg

    • jesuswasablack

      Yeah but Trump’s just a good businessman, GE is trying to form the new-world order!
      http://www.newsprepper.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/0-135.jpg

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      Made in China. Labeled in Spanish. A perfect gift for the Trump supporter in your life.

      • Whale Chowder

        Just the label, not the tie.

  • DougW659

    Those citizens who questioned,
    those suspect harborers of doubt,
    were brought before a panel of the Ministry of Health.
    They were tested and encephalographed
    ‘Til rendered quite insane
    When in accordance with the laws
    They reprocessed their brains

    God save Politzania…..

  • bubbuhh

    These days Trump is mostly the sued cuz #Trumpshit.

  • spends2much

    Rupert’s “News” Corp conglomerate is A-OK, though…

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    The elections are so #RIGGED Republicans only control the House, Senate, 62% governorships and 68% of state legislative bodies.

    • Crystalclear12

      On that note time to open the gin.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Damn liberals. Using biased facts against Donald!

    • coozledad

      He’s talking about the rigging that dare not speak its name. Except at one of his rallies.

    • OddMan

      How quickly Donald forgot what he said last September, Early in the campaign, Trump acknowledged his media advantage. “I’ve gotten so much free advertising, it’s like nothing I’d have expected,” NYT

      And estimates are that Donald has received over $3 billion in free advertising.
      That is a hell of a lot of rigging, Donald my lad.

      http://www.marketwatch.com/story/trump-has-gotten-nearly-3-billion-in-free-advertising-2016-05-06

  • baconzgood

    oligopolies….I’ve never seen that word before.

    • Welcome to the study of economics! Where the rules are made up but could easily destroy everything!

      • Oblios_Cap

        It’s more that all of the assumptions are flawed.

      • baconzgood

        Sort of like roller derby with numbers.

        • And less cool names

          • Nockular cavity

            And less hot tough athletic ladies.

    • Oblios_Cap

      Oligopoly
      An oligopoly is a market form in which a market or industry is dominated by a small number of sellers (oligopolists). Oligopolies can result from various forms of collusion which reduce competition and lead to higher prices for consumers. Oligopoly has its own market structure.

      • baconzgood

        I figured out what it was by breaking it down. But it still sounds like something the cast of Porkies tries to do to look at naked girls showering.

    • Bad Hombre Ron

      Neither has Donnie. That’s why his apologists write this stuff up.
      ‘Just sign here Mr Trump. Trust me, if you understood it you’d agree with it.’

      • baconzgood

        I wish I had one of those apologists. Probably would saved my marriage

  • Crystalclear12

    He needs to stop trying to impress 3rd world dictators, they might get jealous.

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    The Scion Times will be the only trusted permitted news source.

  • anon_the_great

    Can we deport the fat bastard?

    • mackafritz

      I don’t think Scotland would take him.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Hell no. He’s about as popular in Scotland as cheeto-faced shitgibbons are.

        • Celtic_Hombre

          I thought cunt was a compliment in Scotland.

      • Nockular cavity

        Scotland has the most advanced insult technology. They can keep Trump confined in a high-intensity Scottish insult field, in a facility known as a Trumpomak.

    • Saudi Arabia took the delusional Last King of Scotland

  • Did Wonkette make the list?

    MUST. POST. HARDER.

  • chascates

    Just as long as I get my pony.

  • Crank Tango

    “new media conglomerate oligopolies”

    I think I had an uncle who died of that.

  • JVisconti

    The order to have Ben Franklin change the name of his Poor Richard’s publication to Poor Donald is some 200 years too late.

    • NastyBosGrl

      or Poor Dick’s… potato/potahto

  • Bad Hombre Ron

    So, does this mean we can expect MSNBC to replace its current anchors with Chinese ones?

    • NastyBosGrl

      I wouldn’t mind some Chinese-American anchors since Asians are way underrepresented on the major news channels.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        We’re not going to count Connie Chung hanging out at a mall in Oregon trying to get a glimpse of Tonya Harding, are we?

        • Bad Hombre Ron

          We never have. Why start now?

        • NastyBosGrl

          Well, Connie had her day…

      • Whale Chowder

        You don’t live in the Seattle market, do you?

    • Crank Tango

      Didn’t the Titanic sink because of Chinese anchors?

    • Michelle Yeoh

      Please pleasepleasepleaseplease

  • Lance Thrustwell

    Pretty much completely O/T so apologies. But remember the single pure “gotcha” moment in the last debate, when Chris Matthews read a transcribed speech in email that directly contradicted something Hillary claimed – that she never said she wanted “open borders”?

    It seemed to me that Hillary missed an opportunity there. She said she dreamed of open borders, among other things. Isn’t that a good dream to have? All American, or at least all North American, economies so healthy, and relations so good, that borders become essentially unnecessary? Who wouldn’t support that dream? Eh, but instead she mumbled something about energy and tried to change the subject.

    Be an idealist once in a while, Hillary! It’s okay!

    Alright, digression over. Thanks.

    • NastyBosGrl

      But ‘MERIKA??!!!???

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Chris Wallace, and yes, I agree that she should have explained exactly what she was dreaming of: an entire hemisphere where you don’t need borders, because people don’t feel compelled to cross them due to fear of where they are now.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Ack! I crossed Chrises.

        • Bad Hombre Ron

          Never cross the Chrises!

          • Villago Delenda Est

            It would be…bad.

    • Crank Tango

      She also dreamed she was naked on the schoolbus, so there’s that.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Donald Trump will break up the new media conglomerate oligopolies that have gained enormous control over our information, intrude into our personal lives

    That’s the only good idea I’ve heard from him.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      The thing is, the only reason he’s outraged about them isn’t because his sense of the interest of the public is at stake; it’s because they’re being mean to him by replaying tapes of him speaking his own words.

  • Crank Tango

    Don’t worry tho, Pravda is cool.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Hmmm, that gives one pause.

      And here I was thinking, “Well, any man who hates Comcast can’t be all bad…”

    • There is no truth in Izvestiya and there is no information in Pravda.”

  • Randy Riddle

    When David Letterman talked about the pinheads at GE, he was funnier.

  • Vincent Ricola

    LOL “… wildly anti-Trump CNN.”

  • BadKitty904

    In Donald Trump’s Amerikkka, the news will be delivered via courier.

  • jesuswasablack
    • arglebargle

      The “Jail” space is gonna need to be bigger in Trump’s Amerika.

      • Good_Trouble_Yall

        I think the whole center of the board is the re-education camp for the liebruls while the edges of the board represent the fence separating the Mexicans from the U.S. America part.

    • Vincent Ricola

      No community chest or chance cards in the middle, thus making them available to all Americans, which seems right.

    • JVisconti

      The Baltic Avenues properties seem to have disappeared . Vladimir?

    • Toomush_Infer

      These Oligopolies would be excellent real estate – if only we could change their names!….

    • Bad Hombre Ron

      All the Chance and Community Chest cards now say ‘Pay Donald Trump the sum of…’

      • data_ninja

        “But make it out to a the Trump Foundation.”

    • Arolpin

      And the tax rate is still 10% or $75. So Dumb Donnie is going to get a tax increase.

  • arglebargle

    Didn’t we have some fun at the expense of Paul Ryan when he started using the “D” middle initial? I propose a similar exercise with Donald’s “J”.

    I submit Jagoff

    • Marion in Savannah

      Jackass

  • baconzgood

    Woah. Our can’t believe he’s agreeing with Ben “Bad Ass” Bagdikian.

    https://www.amazon.com/Media-Monopoly-Ben-H-Bagdikian/dp/0807061557

    Well even a broken clock and what not

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    I hope Hillary makes Trump bring his hotel, golf and casino jobs back from Scotland, Ireland, Panama, Canada, Dubai, Brazil…

    • Vincent Ricola

      I believe that Scotland, Ireland, Panama, Canada, Dubai and Brazil also share your hope.

  • ViveLaNastyWimminz

    Changed my mind, decided to early vote. Was happy and surprised to see that the only campaign signs on the road leading into polling place were for HILLARY & KAINE! The NoFla Trumpers must already be standing in line over at the St Augustine Amphitheater for the TrumpPityPartyPalooza4Losers this afternoon.Dawned on me walking out of the poll: I just voted for the first woman President of US America!

    • Lance Thrustwell

      And long may our empress reign!

      Ahem. Yay! And good on ya. Can’t wait, myself.

    • BadKitty904

      There were folks here in line before dawn to early-vote.

    • The Wanderer

      And a double bonus! She’ll be the youngest woman President in US of America History!

      • Arolpin

        And simultaneously the oldest woman President is US of America History. She’s truly magical.

        • Celtic_Hombre

          It’s the vagina.

  • JVisconti

    The North Korean Press Association gives 2 thumbs up. At least those that still have 2 thumbs.

  • Señor Taco Skwerl

    So how will the International Wonkette Media Empire be affected if Trump wins?

    • Toomush_Infer

      The increased marketing will be outstanding!

  • Villago Delenda Est

    OT, but related: This is five years old, but it tells you a lot about “Assmunch and his organization.

    No wonder he and Donald seem to get along so well. They both have bizarre notions employment contracts.

  • Crystalclear12

    I have decided to sue Trump for making me an alcoholic.

    • Class Action!

      • Bad Hombre Ron

        The classiest!
        Oh, wait, you meant the other thing, didn’t you?

    • kev

      We’re offering you ten cases of Trump Vodka to settle”.

    • ViveLaNastyWimminz

      We could make that a class action suit.

  • boyblue122

    Drumpf actually thinks CNN, a news outlet that employs a bunch of Donnie’s surrogates, is really pro-Clinton?

    • The Wanderer

      What the hell has his paid mole in CNN, Corey Lewandowski, been telling him?

      • Celtic_Hombre

        I don’t know what he’s telling Trump, but he’s telling everyone else it’s the easiest money he’s ever made.

    • Yes

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      As does 99% of his base

  • LarryHoudini

    Oh, I see, a list of Trump insults collected by Clifford Levy. WOULD THIS BE THE SAME CLIFFORD LEVY WHO IS FRIENDS WITH MARK PACKARD WHO IS MARRIED TO JUDY PACKARD WHO IS SISTER OF CARL RUBENSTEIN WHO WORKS FOR NII HOLDINGS INC. OWNED BY . . . GEORGE SOROS????

    • Bad Hombre Ron

      Six Degrees of George Soros! The fun new party game!

  • fawkedifiknow

    Sigh on, Donald, sigh on.

  • Nounverb911

    OT PSA
    Attention California Wonketteers!

    https://twitter.com/latimes/status/790571242948526080

  • ManchuCandidate

    The orange tinted racist shithead is correct about one thing: The concentration of media is a problem for democracy.

    However, the orange tinted racist shithead is more upset that the media is more than media blow job kiss ass artistes like Matt Lauer and some of them actually do their jobs.

    Cheeto Face Bankrupter McRapey is discovering that it is rough being thin skinned in a world full of (proverbial) knives.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      Another thing I’d rather die than admit in public is that Trump really is right; the media is hugely biased against him. That he, entirely, has brought it on himself usually goes unmentioned, but a pretty fair chunk of our media has pretty much abandoned objectivity because they know he’s a direct threat to the fourth estate.

      I’m still not entirely sure how I feel about it; I’m A-OK with the media defending itself, but it also kind of smacks of the pre-Iraq War groupthink that got libs/dems branded as wimpy traitors.

      • Bad Hombre Ron

        If only they’d discovered this startling fact a year ago.

      • Good_Trouble_Yall

        I don’t think of it as bias so much as I think of it as “a belated attempt to stanch the bleeding that they caused a year ago by vigorously promoting a screaming racist cantaloupe for their own dark needs.”

        • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

          Oh it’s entirely that. I’m still just as uncomfortable about them stampeding *against* him as I was when they were stampeding *for* him, though.

    • MizzMazz

      Yeah, I agree that having media as a conglomerate is a problem, but not for the same reasons the baboon’s taint has. He just feels like the playground bully who has been ganged up on, once the other kids have had enough of his shit.

  • BadKitty904

    I continue to wonder what percentage of his own bullshit Trump actually believes, what with him being mentally unbalanced and all…

    • Nounverb911

      Bigly Percent!

    • cousin itt

      He believes all of it, understands none of it.

      • BadKitty904

        What a strange world he must live in…

        • cousin itt

          Look ma, no hands!

    • Tony Alexander

      AOT,K

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      I think, moment-to-moment, he believes what’s emerging from his mouth. Whether or not that it matches up with what he’s said before is irrelevant, because for narcissists, the past only exists to be used against other people.

  • kareemachan

    Wow, he *really* doesn’t get how being President works, does he…

    • baconzgood

      And you just discovered this when?

  • cousin itt

    In Trump Amereeka, Press press you.

  • JVisconti

    The thought of losing The Onion will make my eyes water.

  • Toomush_Infer

    That’s nothing – after the election, Trump will be suing himself!…

    • And will win!

    • boyblue122

      Will he pay himself off using Trump Foundation money?

  • Nounverb911

    Does Shelley Adelson’s The Las Vegas Review Journal count as an oligarchy too, also?

    • beatbort

      It counts as toilet paper, in a pinch.

  • ArgieBargie

    “NBC, and its Clinton megaphone MSNBC…”

    Wait, isn’t this the same NBC that gave us The Apprentice? Cause I’m pretty sure there would be no presidential candidate Trump without it.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Donald doesn’t think this shit through.

      Ever.

  • The Wanderer

    Hmm, okay. We game this out:
    1. Trump becomes President, and somehow manages to get a law on the books allowing the press to get sued for slander a lot more easily.
    2. Then he goes after comedians and satirists, authors, playwrights, etc.
    3. Then he decides that any form of expression, by anyone, that he feels hurts his fee-fees is a criminal offense.
    And he wants to make America great again how?

    • Suttree

      He never said who he wanted to make it great for.

    • Good_Trouble_Yall

      Don’t forget suing the women who are accusing him of groping and such as. That’s a 100-days priority right there. Because everyone knows the prime job of the president is to use the power of the office to get revenge on everyone who’s been mean to him.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        This reminds me of perpetual candidate for Oregon’s Fourth Congressional district, Art Robinson, who imagines that Peter DeFazio personally fucks with his kids in grad studies at Oregon State. Projection is everywhere.

  • Suttree

    Worst conspiracy theory ever. Let me count they ways.

    #1 This dude is not a hot hippie chic.
    #2 I am not tripping yet and I think this shit is bunk.
    #3 What’s your name?
    #4 I see a severe lack of Robert Anton Wilson books on the shelf.
    #5 Jack Welch was not mentioned.

    #6 I am going to slap your stupid ass with a Noam Chomsky documentary from decades ago. Manufacturing Consent! Wait, get back here you little fucker, you will watch this before you write anything about the media again!

    • Abby Normal

      1. It’s “chick”, not “chic”. Chic is pronounced sheek, and means fashionable.

      • Suttree

        , fixed, the….. spacing) while@ I was at it also, too..!.?

      • bubbuhh

        Are hot sheiks a thing again? I thought it would be more of a while what with the Islamz and all. Also too where does that leave us relegar guyz who wear Merrikan gimme caps and not chic hatz?

      • baconzgood

        I’m sorry Abby but I have to say in my circle of friends “chic” is acceptable. As in “wow. She had blue hair and a Jesus Lizard tatoo. She’s a cool chic.”

        It works as a double meaning and is the great white buffalo of us indie rockers that still buy vinyl.

    • Dealey Lama Libellz

  • Nasty Astraea

    “Donald Trump will break up the new media conglomerate oligopolies that have gained enormous control over our information, intrude into our personal lives, and in this election, are attempting to unduly influence America’s political process.”
    Lock him up for crimes against grammar!

  • Anna Rompage

    Poor little Trumplestiltskin….

    Do you think he’s going to try to break up the Murdoch media empire as well?

    • Duke

      Yes. They stopped kissing his ass consistently and wet enough.

  • Duke

    Maybe the last two weeks will be an excessive amount of Trump unhinged.

    Going down fighting in a flaming pile of who he really is!

    Maybe it’ll be fun, after all.

  • cousin itt

    Did Donald just say Melania is rigged?

    • Duke

      It’s not the word stew, it’s how oyu feel afterwards. Like a James Joyce novel.

      • cousin itt

        There’s never enough commas when you need them.

        • therblig

          Bigly Trump Buck Mulligan…

      • Toomush_Infer

        alast along around anorange….

      • laughingnome

        Portrait of the Conman as an Old Orange Man

  • Royal Ugly Hombre

    I’m gonna need a microfiche reader to see if my name is on that list.

  • JVisconti

    The only hope for Wonkette to survive this purge is to change the name to Scion dot com

  • DesertedPictures

    Just abolish the first amendment: the right to bear arms should have been first anyway. Move it up.

    Trump 2016 !

  • Lefty Frizzell

    A self proclaimed super wealthy real estate mogul and reality TV star with the best negotiating skills in the world (not to mention brain, memory and over health) complains that he can’t get enough of the media on his side?

    Use your fucking skills Donald! Think of it as a very small scale test of your ability to run a country.

    Wah wah wah. What a fucking whiner.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      It kind of reminds me how Libertarians explain away their election failures by saying that they’re poor, since no federal funding. Which ignores that the Invisible Hand Of The Market should be funding them instead, according to their own ideology.

      • Señor Bad Hombre

        “Dear Gary Johnson, Do you believe in the Invisible Hand of the Market?”

        “I don’t know what that is.”

    • Oblios_Cap

      If it wasn’t for the media posting every piece of verbal diarrhea that plops out of his mouth, his candidacy would have been over long ago.

    • MizzMazz

      The bestest and smartest business mogul, who no one likes. Should tell you something about yourself, Donnie. I found an old kitchen sponge under the sink yesterday, and despite the simularity, I liked the sponge better.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      Ah, but that’s the point – the fact that he, with his phenomenal skills and talents, can’t get the media 100% on his side shows just how rigged it all really is.

  • chicken thief

    The only good thing that came out of Trump’s candidacy is that it revived Alec Baldwin’s career.

    Oh, wait…

  • beatbort

    Is Carlos Slim related to Root Boy Slim? This has been bugging me for, literally, seconds now.

    • MizzMazz

      What about Fat Boy Slim?

      • FauxAntocles

        Or Slim Whitman?

        • MizzMazz

          Or Slim Jims? Snap into one!
          Greasy skinny meat sticks that are ultimately unsatisfying. Sounds about right.

          • Nasty Leftenant Anna

            XD LOL!

            How are you today, MizzMazz?

          • MizzMazz

            I’m okay. Good to see you. Have a short week at work, so will be able to spend some time here with intelligent people. How are you?

          • Nasty Leftenant Anna

            I’m good, too. :) That’ll be great to have you around some more. :)

            I’m playing this morning, experimenting with my Halloween costume. :)

          • MizzMazz

            OOhh, whatcha cooking up? Still Black widow?

          • Nasty Leftenant Anna

            No, I’ve got something with all the pieces I need. :) I can show a preview in a moment or two…..

          • MizzMazz

            I don’t think I’ll be able to do any Halloween (Samhain) things this year, but I have this hanging in the closet, and it’s good fun

            https://glowyzoey.com/collections/led-stick-figure-costumes/products/adult-led-stickman-costume

            Anyone can wear it, and it gets positive attention. Such a nice break from uncomfortable costumes.

          • Nasty Leftenant Anna

            :D I like it! Light up the night!

            I don’t have any plans, really. But he little store i open, so I’ll go show off my costume at least.

          • MizzMazz

            I work in a gov’t job, so no costumes or any funtime on the floor. If I’m feeling it, and the batteries work, I will go out on our street and make some commotion. It’s a sweatsuit, so super comfy, and people pull over to take pictures, but the LEDs block my face. It’s perfect.
            ETA, I didn’t realize how popular these got – the guy is making bank, and good for him!

          • Nasty Leftenant Anna

            I love the idea! It would be great for escorting little ones Trick-or-Treating, as well.

          • MizzMazz

            Last couple places I lived there was no Trick-or-Treating, and I think that’s kind of sad, because I loved dressing up, and Momma would make us whatever we wanted to be. I think it’s all parties, or blocked out, because people are scared to let their kids roam the neighborhood anymore.
            Confession: When I was ten, I got to be the Flying Nun. Not so much that I wanted to be a Nun, but I wanted to fly, and I looked the part enough, and it was a cheap costume to make out of old sheets, and Grandma was so happy I wanted to be a nun. Grandma also wondered why my wedding dress was black and purlple, but she was very old then, so it didn’t matter so much then. :)

          • Nasty Anna Dash

            Awws. That’s cute, and again – are we sisters?

            A black-n-purple wedding gown Rocks! :)

          • MizzMazz

            I think we are sisters, and you are the sister I need, not the sister I got ;). I hope I can be the same to you. Too bad we don’t have private channels here (unless we do, and I am too dopey to use them ) I just wanted to say my beloved really liked the vids you posted of the Japanese planes. If I can get my Thunderbird vids offa my phone, I will put them up. Nothing exciting to watch on a video, but being there is good fun.

            Black and purple gown fit and I don’t look good in white. >:)

          • Nasty Anna Dash

            ~hugs~ We are sisters, Hun.

            We can work something out, RE: private. Always ready for T-Birds footage, and I’m happy he enjoyed them. :)

            I look good in white, but that B&p gown would look amazing! :D

        • Mr Canoehead

          Slim Goodbody?

      • FauxAntocles

        Or Slim Pickens?

      • NastyCatsVote

        Slim Shady? The REAL Slim Shady?

  • jesuswasablack
  • Anna Rompage

    Patricia Murphy said this week that she visited Donald Trump’s campaign office in North Carolina and found only “one man learning how to use the phones.”

    Look like Patty’s gonna be sued as well….

    • Crank Tango

      No ground game libel!

    • Toomush_Infer

      Ted didn’t like that…

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Trump’s campaign is ending like the final scenes of Scarface.

  • Crystalclear12

    The reason the media is biased against Trump is because he forced them to say nice things about a Clinton.
    You know how much they hate that!!

  • Indiepalin

    Point of fact: Carlos Slim and Carlos Danger have never been seen together at the same time.

    • Mr Canoehead

      Neither have Danger Mouse and Austin Danger Powers (Danger is his middle name).

  • calliecallie

    (Spoiler Alert) Not the first time Ma Bell tried to rig an election. Just ask James Coburn, the President’s Analyst.

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0062153/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

    • The Wanderer

      Fun movie. Loved the phone rep with the cable coming out of his trouser leg.

  • Señor Bad Hombre

    So Presumptive Madame Corrupter-in-Chief-Elect Killary Benghazi Klinton is beginning to look to set up her Satanic Shadow Cabinet, so which post is she nominating you to?

    • cousin itt

      Department of Snark.

    • Imperial Advisor

    • JustDon’tSayHombre

      The Obama SCOTUS nomination team

  • Joe Beese

    File under: Doing The Right Thing For The Wrong Reason

  • lucidamente

    Time for another re-dubbed video of the Hitler-screaming-at-the-generals scene in Downfall.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Well, his motivations are fucked, but I can’t argue with breaking up the media monopolies.

    • Crystalclear12

      Let’s start with fox!

      • revenant

        Murdoch’s empire is definitely high on the list of targets.

  • Me not sure

    I’m going to make a bold prediction here and say that Trump will end up suppressing the traditional Republican vote so much that, not only will the Democats end up handily winning both Presidency and the Senate, but will come within 10 seats of winning the house. I think that numerous state House and Senate seats will also flip. If we can get mid-term and off-year election turnouts up we can have it all our way in two years. We need control of more state legislatures and a no nonsense SCOTUS before the next census and redistricting. Let’s make it happen.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I was really happy when I heard that’s what Obama was going to be working on. Reapportionment scares me almost as much as their getting the court does.

      • Marion in Savannah

        For sure. Our congresscritter district was recently redrawn because GA12 had had the temerity to elect a Democrat to Congress. (Admittedly he was a piss-poor excuse for a Democrat, but he did have a D after his name.) That’s unlikely ever to happen again the way it’s been redrawn.

        • Celtic_Hombre

          The one silver lining from the 2014 election is that Ohio passed a constitutional amendment requiring a bipartisan commission to do the apportionment using software to ensure competitive districts. Its first test will be the 2022 midterms.

    • Barley_Brains

      Me not sure but me hopeful! ;{]}

  • Longstreet63

    Sooo, just a note on this rant: ATT is not, in fact, the original Ma Bell. It is SBC, a regional phone company created when Ma was broken up. It devoured many of its siblings and eventually the dessicated corpse of Ma Bell, and then assumed the name ATT because it still had market value. Rather like wearing it’s skin.
    But, no, not the same company.

    • The Wanderer

      Berke Breathed noted the resemblance between the AT&T logo and the Death Star.

      • Longstreet63

        Yeah, but the new one is in friendly pastels!

    • Arolpin

      I would say it’s more like the old ATT without all of the expensive, money-losing things like local access in rural areas, research & development labs, and the idea that as a utility, it’s supposed to work some of the time. Now they want to take all the asset they built (profitably) as a monopoly and use it to sell more services at a higher cost, and not worry about overbuilding the network.

  • AnOuthouse

    “Donald Trump will break up the new media conglomerate oligopolies … attempting to unduly influence America’s political process.”

    Russia is a media conglomerate now?

  • lucidamente

    Trump campaign press release or business plan for Trump TV?

  • elviouslyqueer

    If Trump can successfully break up Comcast, then I’m very much pro that. Otherwise, he can go fuck himself with a gigantic unlubed pacifier.

    • cousin itt

      I notion of a ‘lubed pacifier’ somehow concerns me.

      • You poor sweet innocent!

        Don’t you recall David “Diaper” Vitter?

        • Marion in Savannah

          Jeez — it’s lunchtime. Puhleeze, just a bit of decency and restraint during mealtimes would be appreciated.

          • OddMan

            If you are looking for “decency and restraint” that is down the hall on the left.

          • JustDon’tSayHombre

            and it’s a really long hall

    • MynameisBlarney
  • Hither and Yawn

    Breaking up the media oligarchy would be a good thing; ti would definitely increase the variety of anti-Trump slams in print and cartoons.

  • This might be the first general theme to come out of the Trump campaign that I’m actually pretty interested in – media centralization was a real problem for a long time. The internet disrupted that pattern for a while, creating new competitors while hollowing out the entire print media industry, and that’s created a different sort of problem that a normal campaign might even be talking about.

    But of course they have to spin it into some sort of intentional conspiracy, directly targeted toward Trump himself, because you can call Trump’s run a lot of things, but “campaign of ideas” is not one of them.

    • Stulexington

      This puts me in mind of an article, I believe it was even from Wonkette, about how the GOP could probably get more done, or at least get support from the moderates if they just talked about problems instead of a seemingly pathological need to blow things completely out of all proportion.

    • Berkeleybear94

      It is a classic case in the origins of conspiracy – 2 facts, an actual concern and a huge leap to conclusions not borne out by evidence.

      There is a reason to fear consolidation, but it isn’t any of the crazy shit they go off on the rails about. MSNBC isn’t targeting Trump for Comcast, but Comcast sure as shit does have an eye on China/content providers and creators are pulling their punches to make sure they have access to China. But those are entertainment people – that’s what they do. Thinking Rachel Maddow goes after Trump in service of Beijing, though – that’s just crazy. Everyone knows she’s part of the “Gay Mafia” out to make all our children queer, not commies.

      • Within the mindset of conspiracy, there’s probably a lot of overlap in the queer/commie Venn diagram.

        • Bear OmNomNom

          Lavender is the new red!

  • DainBramage

    Guess who Trump said these things about. No, it wasn’t himself.
    “failed”, “a clown”, “has very little chance”

    Martin O’Malley

    • JVisconti

      Emmett Kelly pondering a career comeback or maybe Jeb! ?

    • John Smith

      We know it wasn’t Fatty Arbuckle, he is Trump’s hero.

    • Notreelyhelping

      Clarabelle?

  • baconzgood

    I can’t embiggen that croumulent list on my phone. I’m not on #twitty because #ihazoldz #myopinipntakesmorethan144characters
    #iseenopoint

    So…did Trump insult Baconzgood? Bacon? Or any pork related pork products up to but not excluding pork rinds?

    If so the gloves are officially off in my book!

    • NastyBossetti

      Bacon did not make the list, so you can keep your gloves on.

    • JustDon’tSayHombre

      Take ’em off anyway.
      (When were they ever on?)

    • BadWolfGirl

      You’re safe, no mention of Baconzgood, Bacon or any pork related pork products! (Snickers & snorts as I am cooking bacon for BWK ;)

  • I don’t have much of a problem with breaking up megacorporations, but if you’re only going to do it to the ones that hurt your wittle fee fees, you’re just a pathetic little ass.

  • jesuswasablack

    You know Trump actually talks a pretty good game, ending job killing free-trade, breaking up corporate media conglomerates, saving SSI, it’s really just too fucking bad that his party has been behind most of these problems. If only I was a half-wit brain dead moron he might get my vote!

    https://i.imgflip.com/pyz46.jpg

    • revenant

      he has no actual policies or anything to implement these worthy goals, it’s just a more appealing line of bullshit than his usual

  • azeyote

    he gets more orange every year – you would think he went to Syracuse – probably want to keep him in on Halloween – that pumpkin head thing is to scary for the tots –

  • Anna Rompage

    Irony, a heir of a multi million dollar fortune, and who is married to a super model is claiming the system is rigged against him….

    Face palm…

    • He’s wishing he can start a dynasty like the Targaryans and keep his offspring pure…

      • cat cafe

        You know who ELSE wanted to keep everyone “pure”?

    • edith prickly

      Yes, especially by “anti-Trump CNN”, that keeps hiring his former staff as spokesrobots…

      • revenant

        four, count them, four current or recent high-ranking Drumpff staffers on the CNN payroll.
        and how many of Hillary’s people?

        • zerosumgame0005

          so Hillz folk are the smart ones. got it :)

      • Nasty Land Shark

        The paychecks don’t bounce.

  • badhombreinatacotruck

    Trump is pretty sure Hillary is “Crooked!”

    • There was a crooked man who walked a crooked mile…

  • Scooby

    When they said freedom of the press they were talking about dry cleaners.

  • Coke is rigged!!! Drink Pepsi.

    • Khavrinen

      I’d expect Trump to say it the other way around. After all, a lot of people seem to think he’s a big fan of coke. ( Oops, was that supposed to be capitalized? *whistles innocently* )

  • Callyson
    • Stulexington

      He looks like he’s posing for when he climbs up a cross and nails himself too it.

      • Problem – big nails, small hands

        • Marion in Savannah

          I suppose they could try picture frame brads or carpet tacks…

          • jmk

            Push pins or thumbtacks ought to be enough.

      • Hardly Ideal

        That pose bugs me so much. I’ve said it before, but how can you look at that and not think “Used Car Salesman who rolls back the odometer on his 200k+ jalopies?” Especially when he’s smiling while doing it.

    • cat cafe

      He really does have the tiniest hands.

  • Stulexington

    Unfortunately this is probably just another prelude to Trump TV. A fresh and unbiased look at how the world actually loves Trump and wants Trump to be in charge of all the things everywhere forever. And the icon will be be an old sailing ship with all the lines removed to show that it’s not rigged in any way.

    • Marion in Savannah

      Hence, blown hither and yon by random winds. Sorta like his campaign.

    • MynameisBlarney

      From what I understand, his aspirations for his own network are not going so well.
      Ailes ditched him and his “outreach” attempts via his SIL have been rebuffed.

      He might end up with an online only “BlazeTV” clusterfuck of a show.

      • revenant

        and that, we hear, is on the way to bankruptcy. who woulda thunk it, that a raving lunatic would, first, have as much success as Glenn Beck, and second, destroy his creation by megalomaniacal mismanagement?

        • MynameisBlarney

          Yup, it is a joy to behold, innit?

    • cat cafe

      He has mistaken the fact that he had some temporary success with “The Apprentice” as some indication of his own abilities, as opposed to having a highly skilled reality show producer and the powerhouse of NBC Universal behind him. Not to mention he has some idiotic idea he can beat Rupert Murdoch at his own game in direct competition with him. How does he think a TV network happens? He is completely ignorant of even the most fundamental basics, like, getting people to actually air your programming, a network of affiliates, major advertisers, having actual TV executives, producers, directors, writers, on-air talent, a marketing department, a publicity department, not to mention financial backers. Trump TV will be as much of a disaster as Trump steaks.

      • Stulexington

        But he had Roger all lined up. Which is the best people, believe me.

  • edith prickly

    If I change my name to Edita Espinosa, can I terrify Donald Trump too? #northernmexican

  • LifelongLurker

    He makes up in quantity what he lacks in variety:

    The electoral process

    “totally rigged & corrupt!”“totally rigged and corrupt!”“rigged”“Very very unfair!”“Rigged”“rigged”“allowed Crooked Hillary to get away with ‘murder’”“rigged”“rigged”“rigged”“rigged”“rigged”“Rigged”“RIGGED”“Rigged”

    • revenant

      he has a very small, basic vocabulary. just the rudiments (sorry- there’s another word he wouldn’t know)

  • Mavenmaven
  • Serai 1

    who has got to be feeling so strange amused, knowing that for no particular reason, Donald Trump is terrified of him

    Fixed that for you.

  • Notreelyhelping

    Those revised libel laws wouldn’t affect Trump TV because, of course, it would publish only the irrefutable truth. (Irrefutable is fancy word for “kinda”; no?)

    • revenant

      “irrefutable” meaning “contradiction is illegal”

    • Berkeleybear94

      So much so it will call itself Truth. But because it wants to appeal to our new friendship with Russia, it will use the Russian translation.

      Pravda.

      (Turns out that rag still comes out, but not as one of Putin’s many official media sources)

  • Kooolest G

    is bil moyers advising the trump campaign now?
    oh and you don’t want to hurt trump’s feelings, you wouldn’t like him when his feelings are hurt
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ycVdJVRB-g

  • Vera

    Why can we just have a good old Cocktober? Trump has to ruin everything.

    • sw19roadtrip

      What? He isn’t a big enough cock all by himself for every month of the year?

  • Nasty Khaleesi

    Oligopoly. The new Monopoly. Coming soon to a toy store near you!

    • Doug Langley

      Just what I’ve been looking forward to – a chance to acquire Trump Tower instead of Park Place.

      • Nasty Khaleesi

        Mar-a-Lago, baby!

  • harryr

    Considering that he cannot even pronounce “big league” properly, i am so looking forward to him mangling “conglomerate oligopolies” at his next rally.

  • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    Trump doesn’t know the word “concede”. He also doesn’t know the words, “grace, charity, humility, policy, apology, informed consent, civil rights, preparation….”

    • sw19roadtrip

      Sociopaths gotta sociopath

      • WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

        And voters gotta vote.

  • SecludedCompound

    This man is A Idiot™.

    • PRW

      Bigly league!

  • DeplorableTXTacoTruckofDoom

    Probably noted below, but #justwaking up, so:
    I find it odd he omitted Fox News seeing as how it’s owned by a huge company that has multiple outlets in places around the world:

    Now why would he do that I wonder?

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/21st_Century_Fox

  • Bear OmNomNom

    Trump 2016! No trigger locks — just trigger warnings!

  • Candy Apple

    That NYT article is like a helpful graph of who Donny Dumbass feels most threatened by. The longer the list of insults, the more frightened DT is of them.

  • Celtic_Hombre

    You know, September just flew past, gone before I even noticed. It looks like it will never be possible to get to the end of October. This month just keeps hanging on, filled with Donald’s whiny-ass titty baby bullshit.

  • Celtic_Hombre

    Isn’t it interesting that every charge he makes against the evil corporations are ones he is also guilty of?

    • cat cafe

      The only thing in his putrid, bloated head is himself–everything he talks about, in every way, is just a projection.

  • bookish

    https://thinkprogress.org/trump-first-amendment-too-much-protection-37e72ee16ea2#.uyt2ermhf

    In an interview with WFOR, CBS’ Miami affiliate, Trump was asked if he believes the First Amendment provides “too much protection.”
    Trump answered in the affirmative, saying he’d like to change the laws to make it easier to sue media companies. Trump lamented that, under current law, “our press is allowed to say whatever they want.”

  • whitroth

    Wait – you’re telling me he’s going to swing the anti-trust club, like nobody since Teddy Roosevelt? That I’d love to see. Would he do it, yeah, um, I’ll get back to you about it….

    • Craig Pennington

      Yeah I was thinking the same thing — breaking up the media giants sounds like a pretty good idea, but coming from his bullshitting pie-hole …

      • phoenix00

        Not to mention doing it for the wrong reasons.

        • Craig Pennington

          Yep — his overt motivations are twofold: to silence criticism and to punish enemies. I just don’t trust an actions taken for reasons like those, even if such actions are superficially in line with my own goals.

          we all know that if any big media company suddenly started praising Cheeto Jesus, all thoughts of breaking it up would disappear faster than a Scion contractor’s hope of being paid in full.

          • phoenix00

            Ahem FOX NEWS ahem ROGER AILES ahem cough cough

  • bookish

    Trump a “libel bully”?

    http://www.nytimes.com/2016/10/25/us/politics/donald-trump-lawsuits-american-bar-association.html

    Alarmed by Donald J. Trump’s record of filing lawsuits to punish and silence his critics, a committee of media lawyers at the American Bar Association commissioned a report on Mr. Trump’s litigation history. The report concluded that Mr. Trump was a “libel bully” who had filed many meritless suits attacking his opponents and had never won in court.

    But the bar association refused to publish the report, citing “the risk of the A.B.A. being sued by Mr. Trump.”

  • Henry B.
  • Incoming Ham

    So we get a choice in media, Trump Pravda or Izvestiya?

    • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

      “In Pravda there is no truth and in Izvestiya there is no news.” – old soviet joke.

  • bookish

    WaPo: historic German slur against press shouted by Trump supporters.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/worldviews/wp/2016/10/24/the-ugly-history-of-luegenpresse-a-nazi-slur-shouted-at-a-trump-rally/

    Trump supporters shouting “Lügenpresse” (lying press) started to circulate Sunday, viewers from Germany soon noted its explosive nature. The defamatory word was most frequently used in Nazi Germany. Today, it is a common slogan among those branded as representing the “ugly Germany”: members of xenophobic, right-wing groups.

    Its use across the Atlantic Ocean at a Trump rally has worried Germans who know about its origins all too well. Both the Nazi regime and the East German government made use of it, turning it into an anti-democracy slogan.

  • NasteyeGrex
  • Mike Steele

    Well, there goes our neighborhood version of Cheers…it’s bad enough already. The bank of TVs currently displays all manner of sports, the Weather Channel and Faux News. Soon, there’ll be an Orwellian shitscape of Cheetos Jesus spewing from every screen…

  • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

    Only two pages?

    • Really small print.

      • eddi_the_Bad_Hombre

        I’ll bring a magnifying glass.

  • Akat

    I feel compelled to point out that Verizon, as direct inheritor of some of the baby bells, is way closer to that monopoly than AT&T is anymore. That’s why we have the fiber optic shortcomings. Dude, know your scapegoats.

  • Teto85

    Awwwwww. Poor widdle Donnie got his fees fees hurt. Unfuck him.

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