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Harry wins another round.
Harry wins another round.

That badass Harry Reid is using the last days of his Senate career doing THE LORD’S WORK, for sure! It’s become an ongoing series lately, to report at you what hilarious things badass Harry Reid has said about the pitiful sack of rabid hamster pellets known as Donald J. Trump.

Back in August, Reid declared before God and man that Trump is too fucking stupid to take the American citizenship test. (Probably true!) Then last week, Reid proclaimed from on high that Trump is a “human leech,” a total scammy fraud, and also a “spoiled brat.” (More true things!) And since everybody’s been talking about poor Hillary’s ailing health, Reid pointed out that LOL that Donald Trump boy shops in the HUSKY section when he buys his Rustler jeans from Kmart, because he’s kinda HUSKY for boy his size. Oh, and he also called him a “liar” and a “phony” and “immoral” and “weak.” We just wish Harry Reid would learn to speak up about what he REALLY thinks, you know?

And now Reid has struck again, suggesting that MAYBE the reason Trump won’t release his tax returns because his, ahem, BANK ACCOUNTS, are kind of, well you know, shriveled and tiny:

harry

HAHAHAHA, he said Trump is “faking his net worth.” Wonder what other sorts of things Trump has to “fake.” It would be funny to ask Melania that, if she wasn’t in hiding or whatever.

After playing on Twitter, Reid went to his job at the Senate, and unleashed more hell about how Trump is probably not lugging around the kind of YOOOOGE family jewels he’d like us to believe, because for one thing, he squandered the family jewels his daddy gave him. A few choice quotes:

“He was born with an inheritance but lost his daddy’s wealth,” Reid said. “That’s why Donald Trump won’t release his tax returns. That’s certainly one of the reasons, of course. He is not worth nearly as much as he claims to be.” […]

“In lieu of real business success, Trump resorts to scams, like Trump University,” Reid said, pointing to the various lawsuits and investigations surrounding the Trump program. […]

“If he doesn’t have the money himself — which he obviously doesn’t — then he uses other people’s money,” Reid said.

We bet that’s 1,000% spot-on correct! We think if Trump released his returns, lots of common folks impressed by his alleged wealth would start to understand something about what kind of “rich person” Trump is. His supporters see his hotels and skyscrapers and imagine he’s just BATHING in actual money, and they aspire to have that one day. But we suspect, like Harry Reid suspects, that Trump is one of those “rich people” who actually, on paper, doesn’t have a pot to piss in. We’re guessing everything is leveraged with other people’s money, which would be why he had to use his own charitable foundation’s money (which is funded by OTHER PEOPLE) to pay off his own bad debts and settlements.

In very simple words, we wouldn’t be surprised if Donald Trump’s personal debit card got declined at the Applebee’s.

Look, it’s off-the-charts weird how Trump refuses to release his returns. His creep-faced son, Shitstick Junior, says they would bring up too many “questions” that detract from his dad’s core message, which is that the white race will rise again. Mitt Romney — MITT ROMNEY! — is fairly certain there is a “bombshell” in Trump’s tax returns. Could it be Mittens is reading Trump for one of those over-extended new money “fake rich” people that old money families with actual assets look down on? Is that the “bombshell”? We are just spitballing here, don’t mind us.

We sure do know Trump is overly sensitive about the size of his package, by which we mean the package that holds his ELEVENTY BILLION MONEY RICHES (allegedly). We know when Comedy Central roasted Trump in 2011, the only joke that was off limits was saying anything about Trump not being well-endowed in the financial department. It really bothers him! Is it because he has something to hide? If we saw Trump’s tax returns, would we find out the only thing that makes them bulge so impressively is a bunch of rolled-up gym socks? Oh, we are just askin’ questions.

Hey, Hillary, when you debate Donald Trump Monday night, you ought to ask him this stuff. It makes him CRAZY. If you can get him to use “shrinkage” as an excuse, you will automatically become president by default, #ConstitutionFact.

[Talking Points Memo]

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  • ViveLaDeplorables
    • Callyson

    • goonemeritus

      He should get on that stagecoach and leave town if he knows whats good for him.

    • Jamoche

      “Oh the Wells Fargo wagon is a comin’ down the street. I hope I hope I hope I don’t get screwed.”

    • Big Boppa

      She left him with nothing but a bloody stumpf.

  • Beowoof14

    Lawrence O’Donnell once pointed out that the reason Trump did The Apprentice is because he needed the money from his salary. It’s believable, many in the New York Media have pointed out that Trump’s wealth is no where near what he claims it is, as when you look at what’s behind those pieces of paper he pulls out of his pocket there is little or nothing there. Except for the inflated values Donnie puts on everything he owns.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      I read somewhere on the internet, so it’s probably true, that even taking Donald’s claims at face value, he would have had more money if he’d just parked his inheritance in a mutual fund.

  • Oblios_Cap

    “That bank was cold”.

  • Michael Smith

    Maybe Trump’s just hood rich.

  • Callyson

    Trump refuses to release his returns. His creep-faced son, Shitstick Junior, says they would bring up too many “questions” that detract from his dad’s core message

    He’s admitting that his dad is a hypocrite, then? And probably not as rich as he claims, to boot? Good to know!

    • Gayer Than Thou

      I thought the whole point of releasing tax returns was to raise questions! Tax returns reveal things about how one earns one’s money, how one spends and invests it, how one exploits the system, and, ultimately, one’s integrity. Because you have to say that your tax returns are true, or face penalties, and because you may have filed at least some of them before you ran for office, they are thought to be “true” in a way that campaign statements are not. I know you know all this, but boy does this burn my behind. If Hillary forgot to include one page of one schedule from 1986, we’d be on a 24-hour news cycle about how she’s not “transparent.”

      • I Only Like Cats

        We already are, and I don’t think she has any paperwork left she can release.

        • Gayer Than Thou

          Has she released her seventh grade book report on David Copperfield? Well? Has she? What is she hiding?

      • data_ninja

        In our oh-so-lovely capitalist society, showing your tax returns is the equivalent of showing a photo ID. How else could we prove that he is what he claims to be, or that he doesn’t have furriner moneys all up in there?

    • RepubAnon

      Every time Trumpski’s finances come up, he makes a racist comment. I’d say he’s more comfortable being a racist than having his finances examined publicly.

  • goonemeritus

    Trump is probably too poor to pay for a decent penis enlargement device.

  • jesuswasablack
  • Dr.Zoidberg

    Ok, O/T (slightly) but it’s been a bad week/month/year so someone needs to give me some damn hope before I go back to bed and just stay there…Trump isn’t going to win, is he?

    • cmd

      No.

    • I’m going to keep watching this spot to see what other wonkettes say b/c I continue to be terrified.

    • TJ Barke

      Well, someday the universe will collapse in on itself with a cold indifference to all our struggles.
      That gives me hope.

      • Dr.Zoidberg

        Thank you, I feel better now. I just needed to put it all in perspective…

    • Vincent Ricola

      I’m scared too. 2016 is taking no prisoners. Dems better fucking vote.

      • I Only Like Cats

        I feel like we’re going to end up replaying the 2000 elections and I’m so, so sorry for my generation.

        • Vincent Ricola

          If it’s a repeat of 2000 and tRump wins, I feel sorry for every generation that exists, has existed or may exist in the future. The supreme court appointments alone gives me nightmares.

          • I Only Like Cats

            I can’t believe how stupid Millennials are being— I swear, this isn’t like us.

          • Vincent Ricola

            Don’t feel bad, it’s not just Millennials, this clown bus election has gone on forever and people are burned out. I think the debates will do a lot to refocus attention on GOTV.

          • Daisy

            I guess our generation decided on, “Go big or go home” for the stupid moment.

        • Shibusa

          I keep hearing undecided millennial voters on the teevee talking along the lines of “Hillary has yet to convince me…” Ugh.

        • say wha

          If it is like 2000, and we wind up with Trump v Clinton, since there are only 8 justices on the Supreme Court, Obama gets his third term by default. Win Win!

    • Antonin Dvorak

      http://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/data-points/hillary-clinton-regains-momentum-against-donald-trump-poll-n650926

      She now enjoys 50 percent support among likely voters and Drumpf has 45 percent support.

      • It is mind-boggling to me that he’s even at 45%. 45% of people look at Trump and say “yeah, that’s who I want running the country.” FORTY-FUCKING-FIVE PERCENT!

        GAH!

    • Spotts1701

      “We may yet prevail. That’s a conceit, but it’s a healthy one. I wonder if the Emperor Honorious, watching the Visigoths coming over the seventh hill, truly realised that the Roman Empire was about to fall. This is just another page in history, isn’t it? Will this be the end of our civilisation? Turn the page.” – Jean-Luc Picard

    • Shibusa

      I’ve bookmarked this page: http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/

      • Dr.Zoidberg

        Hahaha! Me too!

    • Señor Skwerl

      No.

    • OddMan

      As soon as the really wealthy on Wall Street think he might actually have a chance, he will be taken down.

      If he wins, worldwide stock market crash, treaties broke all over, trade agreements thrown out the window, politics turn to fascism in the US.
      And finally a military coup.

      That should scare the hell out of all the real Billionaires. It sure scares the hell out of me.

    • Painter of Deplorables

      What’s terrifying me is that he just jumped up to a 43.7% chance of winning on fivethirtyeight. How can people not see how horrifying a Trump presidency would be?

    • Celtic_GnomePlorable

      I don’t really know what sort of people make up the Electoral College, but I imagine they’d be the sort of movers and shakers that would actually see their positions threatened by Trump’s incompetence.

      And, since they aren’t legally bound to follow the popular vote, they don’t have to vote for Trump just because a bunch of racists assholes did.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Something tells me those brats of his better not be counting on an inheritance from Pops. Better start making their own money and stashing it away.

    • Beowoof14

      Ivanka found herself a rich hedge fund manager, the boys are kind of screwed and may wind up working waiting tables. (Well I can dream that).

      • cmd

        They would make terrible waiters and would starve it they had to work for tips.

        • Grizz1y

          They can always fall back on their skill pouring drywall.

        • Busboys. They’d be terrible at that too, and everyone would hate them. But if they work in a restaurant that requires waitstaff and bartenders to tip out, they could continue living off other people’s money. They’re really good at that. You gotta go with your strengths, you know?

          • cmd

            I think if there’s a restaurant job for them, it would be cleaning out the grease traps. No tip outs, either.

          • Best idea ever!

  • Stop picking on poor brokeback donnie. I’m starting to feel really sad for him. Then I realize that the mental capacity of many voters come election day might actually send him to the white house and I want to “pray to the old gods and the new” that he ends up choking (on VOTES)….. At this point even David Duke looks better.

  • whitroth

    Hey, Evan, just a syntactical question: is it the case that Trump is, in fact, a rabid hamster, and these are pellets for feeding to rabid hamsters, or are the pellets infected with rabies, and he eats ’em like popcorn?

    In either case, we want pics of him with rapid foam on his lips….

  • Oblios_Cap

    Trump can always do McCain impressions. He’s got the tongue thing down.

  • MynameisBlarney

    The actual (totally not just made up) reason trump doesn’t know how little money he’s actually got, is because those stubby little Vienna Sausages he calls fingers just ain’t flexible enough to actually count his money.

    • PubOption

      But he’s got guys in yarmulkes to do that for him.

  • Now, I’m definitely not suggesting that someone should hack the IRS and release those returns for our amusement, I mean, our analysis, but if it happens to happen, those things happen.

    But for the love of God and all that is holy, if someone happens to do such an obviously wrong and bad thing, they should delete any nude selfies they find of Trump as penance.

  • TJ Barke

    “Y’all’s just totes jelly.”
    -average wingnut response.

    • I Only Like Cats

      I’d rather be poor than billions in debt I couldn’t pay back.

      • Gayer Than Thou

        Personally, I’d rather be ust rich enough without any debt, but I don’t know if that’s an option in this version of F/M/K.

        • I Only Like Cats

          If it is I’m stealing it and I’m not giving it back.

      • That’s a problem for future-Trump.

    • data_ninja

      It lines right up with their “Why do you want to punish success?” whenever someone mentions taxes.

      • therblig

        i don’t want no gubmint taxin’ my kin on that car up on cinder blocks in mah front yard after i die. that’s mah legacy.

  • Crystalclear12

    Trump will twit about this but not release his returns, which is the only answer that would shut people up. Hmmmm.

  • ViveLaDeplorables

    Harry Reid done stoled the Rethugs’ list of words to memorize.

  • I Only Like Cats

    Weird how Republicans are embracing fascism over utopia. Secret lizard people trying to end the world? Who knows.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Their idea of a utopia is a fascist state…one that they are the top 1% of.

  • Hobbes’ Evil Twin
  • Oblios_Cap

    How come Donald never Twatters at Harry when he says these things? He’s never shy at striking back at anyone else.

    • Spotts1701

      He tried with a nonsensical tweet about exercise bands (referring to ol’ Harry’s eye injury). Harry shot back that even with one eye he can see Trump for what he is.

  • Jenny, Manocidal Vagendiac

    He hussles so much that he legit has to be running a massive ponzi scheme.

    Once you get to a certain point of rich, your money makes money hand over fist that you don’t have to find and make “deals” like a junkie looking for his next fix.

  • Joe Beese

    Leech libel!

  • TheGrandWaz00

    “I’ve never passed a bad Czech.” ~Donald Trump

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    That would explain the eighty foot flagpole…

    compensating much, Donnie?

    • Dr.Zoidberg

      Always.

  • MynameisBlarney
    • HanBarbara

      That woke up the elderly senile cats. Think they are Trumphaters too.

    • Joe Beese

      Yeah, but does the cat live in a swing state?

    • This video makes me so happy!

    • Monsieur_Grumpe

      Yeah but most cats don’t vote.

      • MynameisBlarney

        But the ones that do, vote 9 times.

        • OddMan

          Cats from Chicago vote 18 times.

    • Painter of Deplorables

      What I wouldn’t give to see someone stuff that cat down Donald’s pants just before he steps on stage for the first debate.

    • Cats know a shithead when they see one.

    • Thiazin Red

      I hate to say it, but one of mine would vote for him. She watches him whenever hes on the tv. But, shes a fluffy little Targeryan who also loves to watch fire and violence, so she was already kind of evil.

      My other cat would probably vote for Johnson because he ultimately just thinks he should be able to do what he wants all the time with no rules.

      Basically, my cats are stupid assholes.

  • TeeRaak

    In Trump Restroom…

    Bum: Brother, can ya spare a dime?

    Trump: Sure. [Unzips]

    Bum: That ain’t no dime, that’s a penny!
    https://media1.giphy.com/media/OFWIfCNEoMztK/200w_d.gif

  • JoeChristmas

    At least we haven’t stooped to fat shaming yet.

  • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

    Just came by to let y’all know I’m worth eleventy gabillion million quadtrillion bucks. Believe me.

    • Spotts1701

      Ah, bought up a bunch of Zimbabwe dollars, did you?

    • Dr.Zoidberg

      Could I borrow a gabillion or two?

      • Blacktop Cadence

        When you go to make that same joke, but a lobster man has already scuttled in and done so.

        • Dr.Zoidberg

          Hurray! People are paying attention to me!

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Oh yeah? My output is down, but my income is up. I take a short position on a long bond, and my revenue stream has its own cash flow.

      And yeah I wish I were that clever. RIP Carlin.

    • Jonny On Maui

      Marry me!

      • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

        I’ll buy you something pretty, sweetheart!

    • therblig

      i’m worth 50 Godzillion, but it’s all tied up in asian markets.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      The problem here is that I would vote for you for president, even without seeing your tax returns. Unless, of course, the other candidate was Elizabeth Warren. Or Cher.

      • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

        I am so touched by being your third choice for POTUS! It goes to show how truly moral you are that I can’t buy you with all my fake money.

        • Gayer Than Thou

          You could try. I mean, as an experiment about my moral fortitude.

          • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

            Our fake brunches, imaginary shopping trips at all the best stores and shows we’ll never see will be fabulous!

          • Shannondtaber

            Google is paying 97$ per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family! !os624f:
            On tuesday I got a great new Land Rover Range Rover from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it
            !os624f:
            ➽➽
            ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash924MarketWireGetPay$97Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★::::::!os624f:….,…….

    • MynameisBlarney

      I’m 50% on the way to being filthy rich.
      All I’m lacking is money.

    • Monsieur_Grumpe

      Then you’re buying.

    • Snark Tank of Deplorables

      My brand is worth about $3 billion…plus I have $34.19 in the bank.

      • Gretchen Sharp Kidd

        That’s more than the majority of Trumpkins have the Monday before payday. If he can afford his salmon outside of a can, he is rich in their eyes.

    • Mr. Blobfish

      It’s nice to share https://youtu.be/a3HeyqXESOg

    • OddMan
      • MynameisBlarney

        What do you get when you have 200 female pigs and 200 male deer?

        200 sows and bucks!

        https://cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/71835932.jpg

        • OddMan

          You’re gonna need moray than that.

          • Querolous

            Eel get by.

          • wavicles

            He’s floundering already.

          • Querolous

            Is this his sole porpoise in life?

    • Rock Drummer

      ……”eleventy gabillion million quadtrillion…”

      That’s what, 80, 85 zeros?

    • greyXstar

      Oh yeah? My birthday is coming up ya know. By the way that’s a lovely sweater and your eye is looking fantastic today, like always!

      • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

        Happy birthday! Whore Diamonds for everyone!

        • greyXstar

          Whore diamonds are the best kind!

  • Gayer Than Thou

    I think that he could be worried about what voters will think of him if they discover he’s not that rich or he hasn’t given that much to charity or he’s taken a lot of advantage of the tax code, some of it fishy, but I suspect his supporters are more than able to cognitive dissonance themselves into admiring him for something they would despise in Hillary. I think he’s more worried about what people he does business with will discover, and what the IRS might spot that it hadn’t noticed before.

    • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

      This. I think we view his supporters as more complex than most of them truly are.

      • TJ Barke

        So they really are just a bunch of morons voting with their lizard brains?

        • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

          Apparently!

        • redarmyzombie

          I feel you give too little credit to lizards…

      • Mezzavagenda

        They are kind of like cats in that way.

      • Donald E Niman

        Well, Amoebae are eukaryotes, after all. /s

    • grindstone

      The evangelicals are ignoring a once-married grandmother who stood by her man, for a thrice-married philanderer who runs casinos. They have made their decision, and no amount of facts will dissuade them from their course. Some of them will probably break ranks and vote for the one NOT associated with white supremacy and fucking over charities, but they’ll do it quietly.

      • HanBarbara

        I try to have hope that the real “silent voters” aren’t the ones that feel too ashamed to admit that they’re voting for T-Rump, but slightly embarrassed to admit they’re voting for Hillary.

      • BrianW

        I read an interesting comment on this the other day, but don’t remember where. The person was talking about the fact that hardcore evangelicals cannot countenance a woman being in a position of authority over men. I don’t know how much of it was/is accurate, but having known some evangelicals it sort of makes sense.

      • artem1s

        fetus fetishers will never quit the cause, even if they are getting grifted by a con man

  • laughingnome

    Melania is likely faking something.

    • Brendan_M

      Like her legal status, her college degree, the speeches that she swears she wrote herself, her idyllic family life (when in fact her father had a secret family he abandoned)?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Humanity?

    • Snark Tank of Deplorables

      Her love of Cheetos?

    • MynameisBlarney

      Her respect and admiration of her hubby?

    • therblig

      length measurements and orgasms?

  • weejee

    Betting tRump has been investing in pressure cookers and Tannerite™.

  • therblig

    1000% ? Are you a Trump University CPA?

  • Lance Thrustwell

    It’s a funny thing, the cash-poor billionaire. But it happens. You’re just floating on a big, raging river of leverage, debt, and constant buying and selling. You can ride around in the private jets and stay in the penthouse suites, but nothing is paid for, and you’re always just a few steps ahead of your creditors.

    He’s got the perfect personality for it, though. You gotta admit he fits the profile.

    • BosDeploraGrl

      He is the Becky Sharp of New York.

    • MynameisBlarney

      If he hadn’t been born rich, he’d be hustling 3 Card Monte.

    • Spotts1701

      Yup. He reminds me of C. Arnholdt Smith, who tried to keep a small empire afloat while running from the SEC, the IRS and a bunch of other alphabet agencies. Cost him a tuna fleet, several companies, and the San Diego Padres when they finally caught up to him.

  • baconzgood

    Baconz is running out of snark on this Trump dude. I should have paced myself.

    • OddMan

      I know what you mean, I have run out of insulting words, maybe I’ll try some of Gingrich’s list.
      Just some of the ones under S
      self-serving
      selfish
      sensationalists
      shallow
      shame
      sick

      Those work, but aren’t nearly as good as some I’ve seen around here.

    • SadDemInTex

      Texas State Fair has a deep fried bacon lollipop this year. (I guess they batter the bacon and fry it?) Am I the only one who thinks battering bacon is heinous?

      • Querolous

        are they deep frying bacon on a stick or a bacon flavored lollopop?

        • SadDemInTex

          It’s bacon on a stick. I originally thought they wrapped bacon around a candy lollipop and the deep fried it…but no…lollipop now means something on a stick.

      • baconzgood

        No. Wrapping it in cheese and deep frying it though….

        • SadDemInTex

          I love French fries but that is pretty much the extent of my desire for deep frying (no, I cannot stand fried chicken and I really hate flour based gravy).

  • Panika MCD

    but Donald Trump probably pays for his TGI Friday’s endless appetizer and iced tea with the Trump Foundation credit card.

  • Daisy

    Oooh, I wonder how Trump will insult Harry Reid today? I mean, it’ll be stupid, obviously, but what kind of stupid?

    • I’ma gonna go with outright lie plus dismissal

      • MynameisBlarney

        AKA…Butthurt Poutrage.

  • I Only Like Cats

    Why did the Trump spokesperson who said dumb things on MSNBC look like he was in blackface?

    • Daisy

      It’s their (very poor) attempt at pandering to black voters, or a dog whistle to their racist supporters? I can’t tell anymore.

  • Panika MCD

    OT – Things I’d Rather (Hear Harry Ried) Talk About Than Donald Trump 9/20/16 #5 & #6:

    would love to hear his response to dipshit CJ Grisham who is scared of some gun control and gun safety advocates because BOTH SIDES DUET!

    http://www.mystatesman.com/news/news/opinion/grisham-anti-gun-group-misleads-public-and-is-out-/nsbLD/

    and what easy and delicious recipe he thinks I should try for the Prima Momma because I am about to go to the store. bonus points if it involves a pressure cooker because those are very easy!

  • Daisy

    OT: I haven’t even used Adobe on my laptop before, so I don’t really understand why it’s in…Basque, I think. It isn’t vital for it to be in English, but I am annoyed.

    • Oooo, Basque! I knew you were a secret commie revolutionary!

      • Daisy

        I’m not even sure that it is the language it is stuck in, it doesn’t even look like words for the most part. I could’ve managed if it got stuck in French, or Spanish, and my roommate understands German, so I could’ve begged her on that one too. But this? Yeah, it’s a good thing I don’t usually need Adobe.

        • Is it Romansch, maybe?

          • Daisy

            Doesn’t look quite right, based on what I pulled up.

      • Arolpin

        How about some of those Chorizos that we like? (The best Chorizo are the Basque chorizo, followed by spanish and then mexican. The ones that I had last night haven’t been sitting well. Probably because I ate them cold (they were cooked, but leftovers) after a couple bourbons.)

        I think DocZoom needs to have a Yankee Dog Chorizo today.

    • btwbfdimho

      Be sure those Basques are not half-empty or half-full des déplorables.

  • btwbfdimho

    Then Reid will get sued by The Dj T, who only after people who question his wealth. You could trash his wife or photoshopping him in bed with El Chapo, no problem, it’s all about $$$.
    https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/that-time-trump-sued-over-the-size-of-hiswallet/2016/03/08/785dee3e-e4c2-11e5-b0fd-073d5930a7b7_story.html

  • elviouslyqueer

    In very simple words, we wouldn’t be surprised if Donald Trump’s personal debit card got declined at the Applebee’s.

    I’d even go farther and suggest that Trumpkins eats those delicious endless mozzarella sticks with a fork like a common vulgarian, just like he does his pizza.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    I think it was Mark Cuban that said rich people don’t do things like sell steaks and water with their names on it.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Well…not unless that’s their actual livelihood.

  • Daisy

    If, god forbid, Trump wins, can we put Harry Reid somewhere safe and have him insult Trump from there? Or is that a bad idea ending with the destruction of most of the world, or at least the Western Hemisphere?

    • Blacktop Cadence

      He’ll just black bag everyone until they give up Reid’s bunker of insults.

    • hendenburg2

      Yucca Moutain?

      Oh wait. He banned it.

      (not sorry. I’ll never not be pissed about it)

  • A man with a gold toilet is trying to make people think he’s way richer than he actually is.

    • MynameisBlarney

      Gold spray paint maybe.

  • btwbfdimho

    The He knows that money comes and goes. His current business plan is to buy cheap empty baskets and sell them to different groups of deplorables.

  • Notreelyhelping

    Does Trump suffer from a liquidity problem? Depends.

    (I know I’m stealing that from somebody, but fuck it.)

    • MynameisBlarney

      Hehehe…

      Pewp.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Cold liquidity does lead to shrinkage.

  • McHitler

    As much as I love all of the coverage pertaining to Trump’s various bullshit, I can’t help but feel Wonkette’s entire platform has becomes “let’s talk shit about trump for an entire webpage.”

    Now, I’ve no problem with talking shit on him. He deserves almost everything the media’s tossed at him. However, almost-solely reporting on Trump leads one to ignore the happenings of other candidates or events. The entire blog (and many other liberal news sites/blogs) covers almost nothing but him, and it’s getting old.

    Any news about how 62 Syrian rebels were killed while in combat with ISIS forces in a bombing run by our own airforce? Or how congress-dems are attempting to push for a public option? Or maybe how “guccifer” leaked documents at a conference in the UK detailing DNC donors, their donations, and the positions of prominence they were given from their donations?

    It’s a good laugh to hear jokes about Trump from any site (especially this one), but certainly there’s room for almost any other news…right?

    • Snark Tank of Deplorables

      It’s still a welcome distraction from the months we had of 24/7 Dumping on Josh Duggar!

      • McHitler

        That was a dark time indeed…

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Given the kid gloves treatment Trump is getting from the MSM, there’s an element of catharsis here.

      That said, we’ve had terrorist cookies, Utah abortion laws, homophobic calligraphers, and police murdering a black motorist (again) today.

      • McHitler

        Yes, you have all that once you weed through the Trump storm on the main page. Try this: scroll down the page and take a shot each time “Trump” comes on-screen. If your liver is still working when you’re done, get back to me :D

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Its true the other stuff mostly went up earlier today. Just one more reason to visit Wonkette early and often.

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            or sort by “OLDS” so the stories are in chronological order

      • Jenny, Manocidal Vagendiac

        Eh this guy stops in every once in a while to stir the pot about liberals not being liberal enough. Scrolling or even just selecting a category you want to read is so hard apparently.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Well then, more upbeat stories about Jill Stein it is then.:-)

        • McHitler

          That’s been a more recent phenomenon, and my intentions aren’t to start issues.

          • I Only Like Cats

            Much like Nader-ism, you seem to have unintended consequences. I, for one, would like to know how fast I have to pack if Trump gets the presidency.

          • McHitler

            Depends: going to Canada or Mexico?

          • I Only Like Cats

            Canada. That’s where Future Mr. Cats lives.

          • McHitler

            Yeah, but Trudeau is also there :/

          • I Only Like Cats

            What problems do you have with Trudeau, concern troll?

          • McHitler

            Oookay, no no no. Let’s not open that can of worms.

          • MynameisBlarney

            What’s wrong with Trudeau?

          • Gretchen Sharp Kidd

            I suggest a go-bag in the hall closest. I anticipate a line at the border.

          • Jenny, Manocidal Vagendiac

            So do like the rest of us do, send a note or link to the story and a donation to the editrix because it doesn’t just write themselves. Uh oh Capitalism!

            There’s also wonkeville for your headline news. Or again, sorting by category.

          • McHitler

            The number of these stories are few and far between, and simply sorting quickly leads to previously-read articles, as there are few not pertaining to Trump in some way.

            And if I were to donate, it’d be once I feel the site’s producing content to my liking. Bapitalism :D

          • Jenny, Manocidal Vagendiac

            I donate and gosh I like Trump stories! That is so weird how that works!!

          • McHitler

            Then you do you, friend

    • MynameisBlarney

      Perhaps if this site is not to your liking, there are others that would provide the coverage you require.

      Maybe some folks here appreciate the snarkasm as a respite from all the fucked up shit happening every second of every day.

      *edit*
      last paragraph self redacted. It was needlessly rude.

      • McHitler

        Nah; just an old fan of the site whose watched its degradation from afar since then. Also is going back and looking through my previous comments necessary? That’s…kind of odd.

        • (((cynmac)))

          It’s how we have taken to identifying trolls. You haven’t been around for the alt-right, Dead Breitfart troll invasions.

          • McHitler

            I have been around for the alt-right. Hell, I used to browse /pol/ to read the garbage brewing in the awful corner of the internet. You never know when you need knowledge of opposing views to correct them.

            And…simply having a differing opinion shouldn’t be a sign of “trolls,” right?

          • I Only Like Cats

            That’s not what they said. We disagree heavy and often but Breitbart commenters are sacks of rude racist bile.

          • MynameisBlarney

            It’s not the difference of opinion that makes someone a troll.
            It’s how they express said difference.

          • McHitler

            Expressing a difference poorly doesn’t make one a troll. Even so, how does my original comment make me a troll?

          • MynameisBlarney

            I never said you were a troll, now did I?
            Nor did I say a poorly expressed opinion makes one a troll.

            That said, your OP absolutely reeks of concern trolling.

            I went against my gut instinct in my reply to your OP.

            I’m beginning to think that I was right the 1st time.

          • (((cynmac)))

            Not the differing opinion, but the repetition of much derpitude.

          • McHitler

            What’s the difference to you?

          • (((cynmac)))

            They can be the same, but also different.

          • McHitler

            That didn’t answer my question…

        • MynameisBlarney

          So, a lurker then.
          And the fact that your profile is open, is why I redacted that last paragraph.
          If your profile was locked, then I would assume you would be a troll.

          • McHitler

            Fair enough, but no I’m not a lurker. I come back every now and then to see what’s being posted.

          • LifelongLurker

            Dude, that’s what a lurker is.

        • taco truck vagenda

          Your concern trolling is noted.

          • McHitler

            Having a different opinion is not trolling.

          • taco truck vagenda

            What different opinion? You’ve dropped in to let us know that you’re disappointed with the “degradation” of the site. That’ classic trolling.

          • McHitler

            I’m disappointed in the content of the site, and the differing opinion (in case you didn’t read my comment) is “this site covers too much Trump.”

          • GHERKINS OF TRUTH!

            “TRUMP TRUMP TRUMP TRUMP TRUMP EGGS AND TRUMP”

          • Notreelyhelping

            But…I don’t like Trump.

          • Doug Langley

            Don’t you have anything without so much eggs in it?

        • LifelongLurker

          That’s right—Bring back Butterstick!

      • Big Boppa

        Beat me to it. All I gots now is a ‘say…do you know who else comes around every few months to bitch’….nah I got nuthin’.

      • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

        This. Or start your own site and write about any news that floats your boat.

        • McHitler

          “If you don’t like it, well you can giiiiiit out!”
          Can I not criticize this site and still read it?

          • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

            Yes. Just. Like. We. Can. Read. Your. Comments. And. Criticize. Them.

          • HooverVilles

            And THIS

          • mailman27

            Wait, wait… I’m hearing a faint signal… a whisper in the wind… Boowwwth siides doooooitttt !!!

          • McHitler

            I never said you can’t do that, but just telling me not to read here or go make my own site isn’t criticism.

        • I Only Like Cats

          I haven’t seen any satirical websites that focus on foreign and worldwide news.

          • McHitler

            Give me the funding and I’ll do it, let’s go~

          • I Only Like Cats

            You have to be a startup before you get funding, you know. Unless you’re Trump, for some reason.

          • McHitler

            *Runs to buy orange skin dye and suits made in Taiwan*

    • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

      It’s almost like the man is running for President and the election is important.

      • McHitler

        But everyone is covering him, and in doing ignoring equally-or-more important news.

        • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

          You should start your own site and cover what you want.

          • McHitler

            That’s. Not. The. Point. Of. The. Criticism. Nor does it address anything that I’ve said.

          • The Deplorable Ms. MLG

            You. Are. The. Guy. Who. Shows. Up. At. The. Party. With. Nothing. But. Negativity. And. Criticism. Next. Time. Bring. Weed. Or. Something.

          • I Only Like Cats

            Chocolate. Make him bring chocolate.

          • Daisy

            Ooo, chocolate. I need to buy chocolate, if tonight doesn’t go well.

          • I Only Like Cats

            I’ll send you some lindt bars.

          • hendenburg2

            What’s tonight?

          • Daisy

            Just busy.

          • Doug Langley

            Uh – oh. Beware the College 20 . . . or is it College 30 . . . or College 40 . . . anyway, just watch your weight.

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            just no skittles, I heard they’re all poisonous

          • Tacoclamgenda

            Only some of them are poison.

          • Doug Langley

            Just three of them. The trick is figuring out which three.

          • HooverVilles

            THIS!!!!!1!!1!

          • McHitler

            Criticism isn’t scary or bad inherently, man.

          • I Only Like Cats

            It just can’t stand on it’s own. Like a picture frame, you need a stand. In this case that would be positivity, drugs, or confectioneries.

          • McHitler

            ….Criticism can’t stand on it’s own..? I know you’re trying to be all snarky and fun, but that doesn’t make sense. Also picture frames come with their own stand, lmao.

          • I Only Like Cats

            I meant the frames themselves, which have to have the stand added onto them when they’re built. You are missing that thing and you’re falling flat.

          • sw19tacotruck

            *wakes up and for a second has a panic flashback to woodworking class which is the only subject a womble ever failed*

          • Querolous

            Ditto. My Dad was so ashamed.

          • JustDon’tSayDeplorable

            Those Cakes We Like or GTFO!

          • tinker12
          • JustDon’tSayDeplorable

            dammit! I fergot musturd!

          • Toomush_Infer

            Eat a Snickers, Miss Monroe…

          • TheGrandWaz00

            The steak dinner last night was lovely, but I really wanted chicken.

        • Mike Steele

          Was in jr. High during Cuban missile crisis. While we waited to see if the planet would be annihilated, there was little talk of anything else. Once the immediate danger had passed, the Mantle-Maris debate resumed. Breathe…

    • taco truck vagenda

      So read one of the articles that isn’t about Trump.

    • Astraea
      • McHitler

        Edgy :^)

        • sw19tacotruck

          Not as edgy as TRUMP’S TAX RETURNS!!!!!!minuseleventy!!!!!

    • Lance Thrustwell

      I knew you’d take some shit for that comment, but I see where you’re coming from. One consideration, however, is that this site is devoted to snark & satire, and some subjects, like people being blown up in Syria, are… a little less, ah, fertile soil for that sort of thing.

      • McHitler

        Snark and satire can be had about any form of corruption with relative ease. I just don’t see the need to focus Trump; if anything it might be helping him at this point. :/

        • I Only Like Cats

          Um, with dead bodies still warm and explosions everywhere and families grieving? OK, if you say so.

          • McHitler

            You can make the snark about the people responsible, not necessarily the bodies. But then there always “LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOOOOOOOO–”

            I’ll see myself out for that one, sorry.

          • MynameisBlarney

            Punching down.

            Noted.

    • laineypc

      It’s weird, I would normally be feeling you, but today for some reason I have a deep psychological need to see all the Trump hate and am compulsively immersed. I think it’s because I am deeply afraid what the outcome of the debate will be and I need my blankie. But you’re right. Lots of other holy shit crap to attend to.

    • merl1

      In case you hadn’t noticed, this isn’t a news site. It’s a site that makes fun of people.

      • Lee Hillhouse

        Actually it has won accolades for accuracy. ….and it does not just make fun of people. It fully explains issues. You have to read more than just the title.

        • Toomush_Infer

          “shivers”….

    • Manocide: The Vagenda of Fate

      Hi. Let me start by telling you I feel you.
      With that said…
      There will always be a more important story, a more ink-worthy scandal or international outrage. A mommyblog/dick joke emporium run by a babby overlord and a few carefully/randomly chosen minions isn’t going to be able to cover them all, or most, or even scratch the surface.

      As far as I can tell, and according to Wikipedia, this is a political gossip blog, we are weeks away from a presidential election, and one of the major candidates is a walking talking joke factory/house of horrors. These factors are gonna conspire to create a lot of dick joke opportunities.

      As soon as I am a goozillionaire, I will buy for Wonkette a Correspondent of International Bullshit and a whole Oh Dear Good What The Fuck Is Wrong With People Bureau

      • cat cafe

        Yes, thank you, exactly.

    • Notreelyhelping

      Wait 50 days, and no one will ever want to hear the name Trump again, no matter who wins.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      What is this “news” you speak of?

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Trumpkins are all “temporarily embarrassed millionaires” as John Steinbeck would say.

    Trump is the “temporarily embarrassed billionaire” they all admire.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    OT, but tangentially related. Both the Presidential and US Senate races in Nevada are incredibly close. WTF Nevada? I thought you were on the blue side of purple these days?

    • I Only Like Cats

      It’s the creepy hillbillies out in the desert.

      • Latverian Diplomat

        More unanticipated consequences of above ground nuclear testing?

        • So all those “Hills have Eyes” horror movies were actually documentaries?

          • Latverian Diplomat

            Hollywood never lied to us before, right?

          • But i don’t wanna go to veteranary college and become a cannibal due to a bizarre hazing ritual!

          • Latverian Diplomat

            All the professions have their screening methods.

            ETA:Except maybe journalism.

    • Markuserektus
    • Spotts1701

      Polling can be wonky here, and Cortez-Masto is having problems pulling the Hispanic coalition together. Turnout is going to be very critical. A lot may also hinge on the backlash if the Governor calls the Legislature back in to give the Oakland Raiders $750 million in tax money to move to Vegas.
      One advantage is that Johnson is on the ballot, and he may peel off a lot of Trump supporters in the rural, high Libertarian/Independent American areas. Plus the numbers that matter are Vegas and Reno/Sparks – win there, you win the state.

      • tinker12

        Having cannabis legalization on the ballot will bring out the groovy folks in NV, AZ, MA, CA, and ME to vote for other groovy folks (i.e., not Trump).

  • Jay

    Garrison Keillor nailed it.

    Who the fuck thought anyone would be saying that ever?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      None of his prairie home companions ever said it?

    • therblig

      strong, good looking, above average people?

  • I Only Like Cats

    Does it occur to anyone else that if England had acted like the US during the IRA period it would have been a lot worse? Because that occurred to me and now I can’t shake the thought that Americans are idiots.

    • Paperless Tiger

      It could always be worse. That’s what those angry, discontented voters don’t seem to understand. Sure, we got problems, but up till now fascism wasn’t one of them.

    • Be Gin

      I’m old and I can tell you that your “feeling” about American idiots is actually based upon a well known scientific fact known as Dunning–Kruger effect.

      This is why plumbers and forklift drivers know how to deal with China, environmental problems and complex macroeconomic situations with common sense and not fancy-pants education.

    • KJB

      To be fair, I’m British and we’re seeing a general resurgence of fascism all across Europe. UKIP in the UK, Poland, Germany, Austria, France… Hate crimes shot up after our Brexit vote. This is why I and many other people are so invested in Trump losing – he’s sort of become a modern figurehead for fascism all across the world.

      https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/sep/18/nation-state-marine-le-pen-global-mood-france-brexit-trump-front-national

      Oh the irony of the right borrowing the notion of international solidarity…

      • I Only Like Cats

        It’s because Americans defunded our education system, I’m pretty sure. We spread our terrible ideas and we’re sorry… OK, most of us are sorry.

        • KJB

          Well, we seem to be following suit so… :( Let’s hope that people start realising what a disastrously fuckwitted idea Brexit was (especially as many of its supporters die off) and we can backpedal from the nativist direction we’re heading in.

  • Rufus T. Firefly

    Short-net-worth vulgarian.

    • phoenix00

      not the only department where he’s short

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “It’s not my fault if the market is temporarily undervaluing half-baked real estate projects constructed with shoddy materials by a work force that hates my guts.”
    — Donald Trump

    • Be Gin

      Does that “blame it on the minions” thing still work? Thanks, I’ll give it a try.

      –John Stumpf @ passiveCEO@wells.fargo.com

  • anna rampage

    Melenia isn’t in hiding, rather Donnie had his buddy Vlad banish her to the deepest regions of Siberia after she embarrassed Her petulant man child of a husband while campaigning for him…

    That, or she’s recovering from her latest round of plastic surgery, because you know, the inauguration is just a couple months away…

    • hendenburg2

      Probably where Putin’s (ex?)wife is

      • Sheepshagger

        Lyudmila is resting. Vladimir lover her so much he does not want her disturbed, so a peaceful place was made for her.

    • HanBarbara

      I remember reading that she never wanted him to run for office to begin with- she knew that someone was going to dig up all those photos. Supposedly she is somewhat shy and introverted, although uninhibited about posing.
      If that’s the case, having those pictures in the Post must have been excruciating.
      Just another example of The Dons narcissism.

      • (((cynmac)))

        Allegedly, she doesn’t want to live in the White House.

        • TeeRaak

          Not Yurapean enuff

      • YoBunnyBunny

        This almost makes me want to pity her. But she did marry Trump, so that pretty much exhausted her Pity Fund. Sorry…

        • HanBarbara

          I’m sure there are compensations, but ewwwww…

        • Ulricii

          And she also took off her clothes for the pix, so no pity here either. Those were cameras, Melania. You’ve seen those before.

    • KnaveOfSwords

      Given how often Trump’s “I’m a counter puncher” bit has been trotted out to excuse him lashing out at rivals (or members of the press, or protesters, or pastors hosting his visits, or babies) who had nothing to do with the “attacks” that he was “countering,” and his antipathy towards women… well, Melania has my sympathy, and I have my theories about (one of the reasons) why she doesn’t appear in public more often.

      And my apologies to anyone who’s lighthearted snark just got ruined.

    • Dee-plorable Andee

      Plastic surgery to recover from a bad beating? It wouldn’t be the first time he beat his wife.

  • YoBunnyBunny

    Should the nature of his finances see the light of day, I wish the the whole twitterverse and all the people everywhere engage in nonstop mocking of Trump’s broke ass. Everyday, every news show could have a segment called “Point and Laugh at Trump Because He Has NO MONEY!!!!!!” Just unceasing mirth at the expense that Trump can no longer afford… Is that against Commenting Rules for Radicals?

    • MrCanoehead

      It’s all fair comment. No doxxing, no threats of harm, just accurate humiliation which he so richly deserves.

  • JustDon’tSayDeplorable

    Trollin trollin trollin! Keep it up, Harry! Trump on tilt might induce a tweet for the ages. A deplorable tweet, even.

  • Iam Reading

    I’m worried about potential illegal alien and definitely not future first lady Melania. Is she not allowed out of the house? Is she not able to speak? Is it because of her husband’s culture or religion? Im hearing things. Lots of people are telling me.

    • TheBoatDude

      Donald got drunk and posted the Rules of the House on the refrigerator:
      1). Melaniaaaa can not go outside
      2). Melaniaaa can not talk on the phone…

    • phoenix00

      She could plagiarize the actual First Lady?

    • Sarah E. Grove

      I wanna know where in the hell did Trump’s arm-candy disappear to? Haven’t seen her since the GOP Convention!

  • Nounverb911

    Trump used Trump Foundation funds to pay off law suit filed by golfer he promised a million to.

    https://twitter.com/NYDailyNews/status/778378226351611905

    • TeeRaak

      The game was rigged (by Trump).

  • Rachel Book Harlot

    If there’s one thing Trump loves to do (aside from his daughter), is brag. If he were as rich as he claims, and his tax returns actually showed that, he’d want those suckers reprinted on the front page of every newspaper. They’d be the banner on his Twitter page. Hell, he’d probably have them gold-plated and hung above his gold mantel.

  • JD Mulvey

    The man is worth billions and billions once you factor in the imaginary value of his brand identity.

    • Bee-Doo

      No snark, that’s actually how he ‘calculates’ his net worth.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        He’s going to have one hell of a write-off when this is over.

      • JD Mulvey

        Uh, yeah, I know… It’s what I just said. It’s also how he calculates much of his so-called charitable giving.

    • MANthrax

      He could lose everything if he doesn’t win this. His business is licensing “The Brand” if he becomes a loser I’m not sure he’ll have success putting his name on buildings. As some suggest he could start a TV network with his new found followers.

      • JD Mulvey

        He can always become a tv pitchman for First-Woman-President commemorative coins. Act now, because quantities are limited!

  • This guy’s name is literally made of fake gold, and here you are telling me he’s been bankrupt? And not just morally? That’s ridiculous!

    • cheatara

      Bankrupt multiple times.

      • Most businessmen aren’t savvy enough to go bankrupt even once, yet Trump did it multiple times! #Bankruption

        • At the corner, turn left

          At least we know he’s good at something.

  • At the corner, turn left

    Have y’all ever noticed that with all the whining the orange one does about how mean and unfair those horrible liberals are, saying and writing all those mean and unfair things about him, the ever litigious one has not brought one libel or slander suit against any of those mean liberal sayers and writers. Could be a reason for that, methinks.

    • Yep, he can’t find a lawyer that won’t demand full payment up front.

    • MilwaukeeKent

      Truth being the best defense against charges of libel or slander…

  • akryan

    Why the fuck is this race even remotely close? I just can’t wrap my head around what so many people are thinking. I think a huge mistake that Hillary has made is that she hasn’t put out positive commercials. Maybe they’re running somewhere, but I haven’t seen a single one on TV. Trump can take care of his own negatives. I just don’t understand why Hillary hasn’t put out any commercials about why people should vote for her instead of just against Trump.

    • I think Hills is being smart – she knows she is not an ideal choice for some and Trump is making great attack ads for her every time he opens his mouth or tweets. I think more positive commercials will come closer to the election.

    • She has a commercial about energy running in my area that’s positive and has nothing to do with Trump (I’m in FL, for what it’s worth. I’m seeing a lot of ads.) And really, there is a ton of positive stuff in her platform that’s out there for anyone who cares to look. Problem is, it’s all detailed and involved and not much of it looks like something that could be easily boiled down to a 30 second ad, or a tweet, or a soundbite. It’s all there, though – people really need to read. Especially people who can’t make up their mind about who they want to vote for – those people ought to be poring through the pages and pages of policies she’s got on her site. (I guess they should also look at the 8 or 10 30-second videos Trump has on his issues page too, for comparison purposes.)

      Honestly, her biggest mistake is probably assuming that the American electorate is smart and curious enough to find and digest any information that isn’t spoon fed to them in a commercial or meme.

      • akryan

        I’m glad to hear that. I think it should have happened a lot sooner. She needs to slaughter him in these debates. I don’t know if she can do it.

        • MANthrax

          I’m not a Hillary fan but loathe Trump even more. Trump is all things wrong in this world but he is one hell of a sales / con man and it’s like you or I going up against LeBron 1on1. I pray I’m wrong and atheist but God help us.

          • akryan

            The fact that the the moderator has said that he won’t call out lies really makes me worried. He has no motivation not to lie. He doesn’t even have to convince people he’s not lying. The only thing he has to do is muddy the waters. He’s also great at quips. He has a significant advantage in these debates.

          • MC Planck

            I would pay cash money to see Hillary get up there and tell a whale of a whopper. Just straight out lie: “Donald, we have video of you in that hotel room with that 13-year-old. As soon as the Justice Department validates it, they’ll be arresting you.” Or something along those lines. Just flat-out insane bullshit.

            And you know – you know! – the moderator would call her out for lying. Even if Trump had just told three lies in thirty seconds and he let it pass.

            Then Hillary looks at the moderator and says, “I thought you weren’t going to call out lies.”

    • TeeRaak

      Why? Because stupid people prefer to be lied to by lying Liars who tell lies they like so much. Simplistic lies for simple minded morons.

    • MC Planck

      Misogyny. That is why this race is close. You know how Obama made us realize that we are way, way more racist than we thought we were? Black men got the vote before women. We are way, way, way more sexist than we’ve ever been willing to admit.

      Trump may destroy the economy, plunge the world into war, and give Europe to the Russians, but at least he’ll preserve white male privilege. And for a shocking amount of Americans, that’s all they really care about.

    • House0fTheBlueLights

      I’ve seen quite a few positive Hillary messages, it’s just that those hilarious Trump “Briefings” tend to be the ones shared.

    • greyXstar

      There are positive ones, but it seems like there are more negative ones and they get more play. Personally I think Hillary needs to back off a bit and do more positive policy based stuff. Trump’s negative numbers aren’t going any higher.

  • KJB

    His creep-faced son, Shitstick Junior, says
    they would bring up too many “questions” that detract from his dad’s
    core message, which is that the white race will rise again

    Perfection.

  • Relentless

    Hillary is a sickly known liar. Hello??? People are sure stupid and ignorant. Benghazi, server in the home, Bleach Bit, saying she only had one device while she has had at least 13, destroying some with a hammer ( who destroys a phone with a hammer), losing some, not remembering if she had training, does not know that a ‘C’ means confidential……I am tired of typing all of her corruption. And she is SICK! That was no faint. It was a seizure and so are all of her face tics and blank stares. Yep….she is fit. She is running to keep Dobama’s corruption under wraps. Like we cannot wire money to Iran. Oops..…we did wire money to Iran.

    • Lara

      Hello?

      • Relentless

        Hello what?????

    • TeeRaak

      Most of what Hillary says is True, Mostly True or Half True.

      Most of what Trump says is Mostly False, False, Pants on fire False.

      Source: http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/lists/people/comparing-hillary-clinton-donald-trump-truth-o-met/

      Your point is….?

      • Relentless

        I believe my point is quite evident. Not to worry. She will be incapacitated in due time.

        • jmk

          Sure she will.

          What an active fantasy life you have, lil cupcake!!

    • Paperless Tiger

      If only BleachBit could get the cruft out of your head like it does your computer, you might be okay.

      • Relentless

        That was a completely moronic statement. You think it is funny what she did? You need Bleach Bit and a new brain.

        • jmk

          You know nothing at all about IT, do you, Dippy?

          When ANY device is decommissioned in a professional organizaion, it is wiped. Data is powerful and must be protected.

    • MC Planck

      Even if what you say was true, how is Donald better? He was actually fined for illegally donating, and as a result of that donation avoided an investigation into his actually fraudulent University.

      But OK, you don’t care about him ripping off goobers and yahoos. Doesn’t it bother you that he is in hock up to his ears to the Russians, that he says nice things about Putin, that he said he’d junk NATO and let Putin have the Crimea?

      When did your hatred for Hillary trump your hatred of the Russians?

      • Relentless

        Most of what you state about Trump, thus far, is unproven; however, there are a plethora of corruption proven about the Clintons. She was bring paid by me (and you) and he wasn’t. Personally, I will take Putin over Obama and day. Your last question makes no sense.

        • MC Planck

          “Personally, I will take Putin over Obama”

          And that’s all we need to hear. A True Patriot you are, a loyal defender of the Constitution, a warrior for justice, truth, and the American way… NOT! Thanks for playing.

          • Relentless

            F you!

          • MC Planck

            Such scintillating conversational skills are wasted on us poor dumb libtards. Redstate is calling for your talent. Or maybe Stormfront?

          • jmk

            We’re grown-ups here.

            We’re allowed to say fuck you, you shrunken-brained lickspittle. Piss off back to Drumpfleland.

    • DL

      Dobama? This has got to be fake. Or a prime example of Poe’s Law.

      • Relentless

        I made it up………Dope/Obama

        • jmk

          Making you Borelentless?

    • Vagenda and Tiara

      People sure are stupid and ignorant! Some idiots don’t even know the State Dept employees were required to destroy those phones.

      Have you ever stopped to wonder why the most investigated woman in the world has never been indicted or arrested for all of her “crimes?”

      Are you aware that 56 embassy employees were killed under the Bush regime? Odd that you never hear about that, isn’t it? Maybe it’s because Democrats don’t try to make political points off of tragedies. Christ, your idol Reagan turned and ran out of Beirut after 300 marines were killed on his watch.

      Also, you are A idiot.

  • TeeRaak

    Trump not being well-endowed in the financial department

    Since Trump hasn’t given to charity since 2008, that would indicate to me, he’s B-R-O-K-E.
    https://media.giphy.com/media/l4KhOnDl9ObQxL1BK/200w_s.gif

  • Paperless Tiger

    People are saying that Trump is in hock up to his goofy bouffant. I don’t know. Maybe the IRS. Maybe the dolts who are donating money that he puts in his pocket. Maybe they can figure out they are getting screwed. People are saying.

  • DL

    Trump being continually bankrupt would probably matter if the media even cared one bit about ever holding his feet to the flame. But the minute that Trump was able to get away with not paying *children* for performing at his own press event, that was pretty much the moment the press, by and large, rolled over for him.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Trump has said himself that he includes the “value” (self-assessed) of course, of his “brand” as part of his net worth, and he estimates irrc at $3-$7B. And that ain’t gonna show up on a tax return, because fairy tale.

  • Sarah E. Grove

    I LOVE Harry Reid! Give the orange shitgibbon hell, Harry!

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