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Top of the morning to you Wonkers on this fine Taco Tuesday! Here’s some of the stories yr Wonkette might ‘splain with dick and fart jokes today.

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  • dslindc

    That Charter School segment from John Oliver was very good. Also his bit at the end of the show encouraging Trump to drop out.

  • Msgr_Moment

    Has Melania Trump ever seen the inside of Glenn Beck’s trunk? Inquiring minds want to know!

    • dslindc

      It seems irresponsible not to speculate wildly.

    • Painter of Goats

      Trunk or trunks?

  • Michael Smith

    Yes, the John Oliver segment taught me that charter school advocates and critics alike refer to Ohio as “the Wild West of charter schools,” which seems to be a very boring version of the wild west.

  • Rick Hill

    “…not really real story about Melania Trump having Love for Sale in the 1990s.”

    Now, if not then.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      Oops – I should always scroll down. GMTA!

      • Rick Hill

        I would say great minds, yada yada yada but trump has been my idol and now I will just say “You will hear from my lawyers!!11”

  • Msgr_Moment

    Barack Obama’s going to go hang out in Louisiana and check out how bad the flooding is now that the governor says it’s cool. Good thing Bamz spent a few years making FEMA great again

    Dubya just wanted to say, “Heckuva job, Brownie.”

  • Major_Major_Major

    I’m Just Asking Questions, but was Melania a member of the guild of seamstresses?

  • Ezio

    Oh yeah, Trump being afraid of going to black communities will definitely ensure he gets that “95% of the African American vote” he was talking about.

    How does Corey Lewandowski keep getting invited on tv?

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      How can CNN justify paying him a salary when he’s also taking a salary from Trumpf? Do they have a Clinton staffer on payroll? People are asking this (no, they aren’t, but they should be!).

      • wide_stance_hubby

        CNN freed itself from cumbersome things like integrity long ago–it really streamlined operations.

        • Good_Gawd_Yall

          I guess once you’ve revolutionized television news, there’s nowhere to go but down. Sadly.

      • tehbaddr

        People are saying things. We’re looking into that.

    • Vincent Ricola

      CNN is where fired campaign staff goes to die. They are also embracing Faux news refugees.

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    So, the Trumplethinskin campaign doesn’t mind if everyone knows Melania has sex for money now, but they’re upset that we might learn that she once got paid for having, presumably, better sex before she hopped on the Trumpf money train? Okay . . . .

    • Painter of Goats

      Oh thanks, now I am thinking about Melania hopping on Trump’s “money train”. Oh well, at least that’s more creative than “Little Donald”. But still, ew.

      • tehbaddr

        More like she slides up and down his body, rubbing herself all over his little nub.

  • AntiDerpomeme

    Taco Tuesday is incomplete without the south-o’-the-border tequila. Mr Trumpachump, tear down that wall!

  • AntiDerpomeme

    I just hope Melanoma put some of the proceeds from her various “business enterprises” into a rainy-day fund. ‘Cause you know at some point the yam will cut her lose for younger, dumber wife #4.

    • (((JustPixelz)))

      Don’t be coy with “wife #4”. Just say “Ivanka”

      • sw19womble

        Bringing true meaning to the term “sister-wives”

    • Rick Hill

      No concern. Putin is paying her well…

  • berkeleyfarm

    “Jill Stein Soylent Scooter” … glad I wasn’t drinking my morning cup o’joe when I read that.

    • Well, Gary Johnson is just puttering along in his Sedan of Sadness.

      • Hijabi Rockstar

        I know a guy who’s all about Gary Johnson. What’s that? Yes, he is a white male freshman, how did you know?

  • Good_Gawd_Yall

    I need a story about the good guys. Could we have something about, say, Sherrod Brown or Al Franken, or an update on Gabby Giffords, or a Happy Nice Time with Amy Klobuchar? I’m having that thing where it feels like there’s just so many assholes, I can’t even.

    • I try, but sometimes the headlines just aren’t available that early in the morning.

    • Señor Skwerl

      The Minnesota State Fair starts Thursday, come meet Al and Amy in person. And drink some mini-doughnut beer.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        Love to, but that’s a hell of a commute.

  • Major_Major_Major

    Henceforth, Donny will be allocating not a fucking penny a portion of his funding towards Colored People Diverse Demographic Outreach™.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      He should hire Mel Gibson or that guy who played Kramer. I hear they’re available.

      • Major_Major_Major

        David Duke is still waiting by the phone, also too.

        • Good_Gawd_Yall

          I shouldn’t criticize people’s appearances, but Duke looks like somebody who had his pressure washer pointed the wrong way.

          • wide_stance_hubby

            Not a criticism, but I note that his hair looks to be about 400 years younger than his evil-ravaged face. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. . .votes as needed, etc.

    • Painter of Goats

      But how large a portion…same as his hands in proportion to his tangerine coated self?

  • wide_stance_hubby

    I think it’s outrageous to essentially call Melania a high class hooker. If she had any class, she would not have married an orange turd.

    • jmhm

      I don’t know why this is a story. Donald Trump couldn’t bag Milo if he wasn’t rich. The sky is blue and upwards of here. In other news, water wet.

      • Good_Gawd_Yall

        I think the implication in the story is that she was a hooker BEFORE she married Trumpf. Which, of course, isn’t a story because who cares, but it has apparently become illegal to have news stories that don’t include at least one member of the orange tribe.

        • jmhm

          I mean, I support women making the best choices they can with their bodies, but unless young Barron is a baster baby, “Melania Trump has sex because money” is not news.

          • Vincent Ricola

            This.

        • Aquaria

          Most people don’t care that she was an escort, in theory.

          However…

          First is the obvious: There are still people in this country who do think it’s a big deal if a future first lady was an actual whore.

          Second: This is a man who has trashed everyone and subjected them to the most disgusting vitriol about their personal characteristics (Mexicans are rapists). Anyone who does that makes himself and his family fair game for the same type of vitriol in return over their personal characteristics.

          Finally: There is a legal question here related to when she came to the US, how, and what it could mean for her status as an immigrant. If she was here earlier and working as a prostitute (let’s not sugarcoat what an escort is), then she undoubtedly had a boatload of illegal, unreported income. So what, you say?

          So there’s a part of the green card application where applicants have to verify that they have not committed any illegal acts in this country. Prostitution and failing to pay taxes are illegal acts; ergo, she could be in very serious legal trouble over that alone, and it could jeopardize her status as an immigrant here, adding fuel to the rumblings already out there about her legal status to be in the US.

          Which is ironic, given–again–Trump’s vitriol about immigrants.

      • wide_stance_hubby

        Milo? If that’s a story, I am so glad I missed it, I’m going to continue to miss it.

        • jmhm

          Well, suffice it to say that Milo probably doesn’t publicly pine to be turned over the knee of most paunchy old guys.

      • “Donald Trump couldn’t bag Milo if he wasn’t rich.”

        I read “bag” as “bang” and now I’m ill. Not that Trumpy’s short fingers could satisfy Milo’s yearning for BBC, of course.

  • jmhm

    Pssst. Tweak.

    • ??

      • jmhm
        • wide_stance_hubby

          T also

        • Jamoche

          Stay the course. Ride that puppy down in flames!

  • Groundloop

    I listened to the Bongino meltdown at the YouTube link and had a good chuckle. Then I made the mistake of starting to read the comments. Never read the comments. Thank goodness they aren’t allowed here.

    • Pro Tip: You can download a CSS add-on, or a general browser extension, that limits the youtube comments.

      • arglebargle

        Just the tip.

      • Groundloop

        Thanks for the tip. Pro or otherwise. I’ve installed a Chrome extension that looks to be effective.

        Further to the Bongino story, I thought for a second he was the same guy that threatened to throw a reporter off a balcony. It isn’t, that was Mike Grimm, but in discovering that, it looks like Bongino wants to sue the Politico Florida reporter because he (Caputo) recorded the call without Bongino’s consent, even through the Twitter exchange between them shows otherwise:

        http://www.breitbartunmasked.com/2016/08/23/dan-bongino-threatens-to-sue-caputo-over-profane-phone-call/

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      No, no, never the comments, or the bumper stickers. That’s how I’ve survived living in Kentuckistan since the hostile takeover of Our White House by that black Kenyan Muslim mom-jeans-wearing tyrant.

    • sw19womble

      Pro Tip: Never read youtube comments without a hazmat suit and breathing apparatus (unless you’re watching anime clips, they tend to be a bit more chill).

    • wide_stance_hubby

      Never read the comments, never play the video. Both of these things slow down commenting about them!

  • Joshua Norton

    Strange how Trump has to hire a new set of lawyers every time he takes some kind of legal action. Usually a normal business has an established firm that handles all their legal matters. I wonder if he pays his legal bills as conscientiously as he pays his other vendors (i.e. totally screws them over).

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      It’s almost as if people find working for him to be unpleasant. Weird.

    • Doug Langley

      Remember all those lawyers he hired to take on the vendors suing him for non-payment? Well, now those lawyers are suing for non-payment.

    • OneYieldRegular

      He hires teams, drifts, flotations of lawyers, contracted, subcontracted, mini-contracted. I know one who has worked on Trump projects – and who, to his credit, recently declared his refusal to do so any more.

    • Michael Smith

      I think he’s like the Chinese Emperor that built the Terracotta Warriors – after the laborers finished the warriors and the rest of the tomb, the emperor had all of them killed and buried there so that the location and layout of the tomb would die with them.

      Trump finishes one lawsuit, then hires a new firm to sue the former legal team, and on and on..

  • Painter of Goats

    So according to Corey Lewandowski if Donald Trump is elected he will make life better for black people so that Donald Trump will feel safe enough to visit black people.

    • tehbaddr

      A visit from Donald Trump makes everybody’s life better. NOT!

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        Vendors of spoiled fruit and vegetables might disagree.

    • Left Coast Tom

      Trump had to sneak into the back entrance at the California State GOP convention in Burlingame. The US Census tells me Burlingame is 1.2% African American.

      I guess Trump has never considered the possibility that if he’s finding it difficult to visit people, the problem may lie with him and not with other people.

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        Just because you can draw thousands of bitter, twisted racist assholes to a venue doesn’t mean you are popular Donnie. Know who ELSE can draw big crowds in spite of being almost universally reviled?

        • Good_Gawd_Yall

          It’s Hitler this time, isn’t it?

        • Catstro

          Nickleback?

          • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

            You win the Kewpie doll!

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    Trump wants special prosecutor to investigate Clinton Foundation. HEY! Ken Starr is looking for a job.

    • mackafritz

      Release your tax returns Donnie.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      As soon as the special prosecutor gets finished investigating why the rent at Trumpf Tower suddenly went up to five times what it was when Donnie was paying the bills, and Trumpf “University,” and what Trumpf’s hiding in his taxes, I’m sure he’ll have time to get around to the Clinton Foundation. Would some time in 2067 work for you, Cheeto Benito?

    • jmhm

      Jonathan Chait has been javerting about this for years. I’m sure he’d be thrilled to have the opportunity to support the warmongering Republican candidate more directly.

  • Lance Thrustwell

    Why would anyone print something like that about Melatonin unless they had rock-solid evidence? (Hell, even then, I wouldn’t print it, but then I think (independent, unpimped) sex work is okay.) Anyway, isn’t a presumably undersourced accusation against the wife of one of the most litigious men in the galaxy kinda… stupid?

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      I think someone’s discovered (not sure how, it’s a mystery!) that Trumplethinskin has a short fuse, and is trying to provoke a Twitter storm.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Could be a pretty damn expensive twitter storm.

    • PubOption

      Also, why does a lawyer named Harder seem to specialize in sex-related lawsuits?

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Andrea Tantrum claims Fox is the Playboy Mansion of cable news, files lawsuit.

    • ManchuCandidate

      Avoid the FNC grotto though. It becomes a wading pool when Jabba Ailes slithers in with his metal bikini clad employee du journey.

  • Vincent Ricola

    I don’t need the 90s to confirm Melania Trump’s willingness to engage in pay-to-play. She consented to marry Donald J Trump and I am pretty sure it wasn’t because of his sparkling personality, handsome looks or timeless observations about the world around him. That’s all the proof I needed.

    And Jeff Weaver is an ass. I’d quit too.

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    One way Trump can show his sincere interest in getting black votes is to call for the repeal of all those fucking Republican voter restriction laws. Your move Little Donnie.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Purple reign purple reign.

  • Señor Skwerl

    Yesterday I posted on the Facebooks that it was okay if she was a sex worker and we shouldn’t drag this out because I have known several individuals (for whatever reason) chose to work in the sex industry.

    I await my letter.

    But here is my first draft of my response:

    Dear predatory law firm,
    I would like to first point out that I have no assets, You might as well sue an lemonade stand or a Central Park skwerl. Secondly: look up the Streistand Effect.I am sorry that other people have accused her of being a whore and marrying him so she can have “whore diamonds” (their words not mine) and responsibly speculating on how a model chose to marry such a person. This was not the purpose of my post. My post was showing support for people who have worked in the industry and not to shame them.

    But you seem to want threaten any blog poster who dares to comment on the Gawker artice: http://www.liberalamerica.org/2016/08/22/trump-lawyers-said-melania-didnt-fk-money-forced-us-apologize/

    So I apologize for showing support for sex workers who are forced to be treated as second-class citizens in the eyes of the public. I apologize for my compassion and withholding of judgement whether they are actively working in the industry or not.

    In other words, I apologize for trying to be a decent human being.

    Sincerely,
    Skwerl

    • (((JustPixelz)))

      Needz moar “go fuck yourself”

    • marxalot

      I agree: there are any number of legitimate criticisms of the woman and the company she keeps. Acting as if all those pale before the fact that *gasp* she made money off her body is an insult to everyone who’s ever plied the oldest trade.
      Love the letter.

      • Candy Apple

        I don’t care if she prostituted herself or not. But I do revel in the additional crap topping to the already overflowing shit sandwich the Religious Right has to choke down in order to support the Republican candidate and still maintain that they are voting for “God’s chosen vessel”.

        • artem1s

          these guys would have loved Henry VIII. watching Drumpf, I’m beginning to believe in reincarnation, dammit.

    • Hutch

      I know it’s a draft, but you’ll add the name of the predatory law firm, Shit, Fer & Brains, in the final won’t you?

  • Bad Granny

    *ahem*
    That’s West By God Virginia, or Mr Lincoln’s Virginia, depending upon which Virginia one happens to be standing in.

    • sw19womble

      What about Yes, Virginia?

      • marxalot

        I prefer “No, Virginia”

        • sw19womble

          You monster!!! Why do you hate Santa Claus!!!!!

    • tehbaddr

      The one with less teeth per capita.

      • Bad Granny

        Fewer.

        • tehbaddr

          Uh oh, I’m getting grammar skooled here!

          • Bad Granny

            By a hillbilly with a pretty casual relationship with the language and frightening low tooth count.

  • tehbaddr

    From the conspiracy link:

    “Big events like wars, the current recession, and the outcomes of elections are controlled by small groups of people who are working in secret against the rest of us,”

    I agree, they’re known as the 0.1% ers!

    • Candy Apple

      Down with the Bourgeoisie! Uphold Marxism-Leninism-Eat-The-Rich-ism!

      • tehbaddr

        Libtard Tory Marxist uprising NOW!!!111!1111!!!!!!

    • bookish

      As it ever was.

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    When Trump and his mouth hole talk about the supposed corruption of the Clinton Foundation, I wonder how he expects to separate himself from his own foundation, its donors, his businesses all over the world. If Bill Clinton remaining on the board of the Clinton Foundation is too close for comfort, Trump needs to divest himself of his foundation and ALL his business interests. (Sorry carnivores, including Trump Steaks!) And Melania needs to divest of her businesses.

    His children’s properties are suspect too.

    Here’s an all-too-likely scenario: Scotland acquires a nuclear bomb and stores it next to Trump’s golf course. Trump then refuses to launch a a pre-emptive attack until after “the busy season”. But during that crucial interval, the radical Scots nuke a gay nightclub in South Bend, IN. We cannot let this happen!

    • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

      That sent a chill up my spine. It’s all too plausible. If Drumpf is elected, anything could happen!

      • artem1s

        yep, this needs to be the lesson of the century. drowning government in a bathtub has consequences. One of them is candidates like Drumpf within reach of the nucular codes. ANYTHING can and will happen.

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      The liberal media needs to push this whole narrative, that Trumpf is so heavily in debt to foreign countries, because he actually is. It’s not just some “appearance of impropriety” – the man is owned by the Russians and the Chinese.

      • Pierre_de_Fermat

        What about the Scots?

  • alwayspunkindrublic

    Holy shit, you see the photo of the mildewed sheetrock cubicles Trump is charging the suckers 170K a month for? Dude can’t even resist being grifting slumlord to his own campaign.

    • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

      Classy as fuck!

    • tehbaddr
      • Blank Ron

        Ye gods and little fishes, just looking at the picture is giving me breathing problems.

        • tehbaddr

          But tRump Tower, so classy!

          • Blank Ron

            He has the best drywall!

      • Spotts1701

        The last building I saw that looked like that was about 2 weeks from being demolished as a health and safety hazard.

        • tehbaddr

          Some molds are beneficial, like in Roquefort. That doesn’t look like a good one though.

          • OneYieldRegular

            However, “spreadable sheetrock” does describe the taste of many of the products Americans call “cheese.”

          • SDGeoff

            Or “cheese food”.

    • FauxAntocles

      I wonder if they charge extra for the flag…

    • OneYieldRegular

      He’s gonna create so many (mildewed sheetrock cubicle) jobs your head will spin.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Today’s rundown doesn’t seem as depressing as yesterdays. Sort of a Not-Too-Bad Tuesday, if you will.

    • Catstro

      Don’t jinx it!

  • Bill Slider

    Jill Stein must be a total loser. The year the Democratic Party decides to go conservative on our ass, and be all Hawkish with Hillary, in order to attract the not that crazy wingnut version of the GOP, read the educated, white, money boys, the progressive wing of the Democratic party is just sort of hanging out there with no place to go. The Green party, with their environmental policies, could become the much needed, viable third party. So the Green party, seeing the open door for growth, seizes suicide instead by embracing the not science at all, anti Vax philosophy. Trump and Stein must both be secretly be supporting Hillary. Hillary needs to keep that health rumor just a rumor, or we are all fucked, and not in a nice way.

    • eka

      people always talk about wanting a third party, but it’s extremely unlikely with our system. maybe if the republican party implodes, there’d be room for something else on the right to form. i’d rather focus on moving the party we have to the left.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duverger%27s_law

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        Exactly. Here we have a useful vehicle that needs some work, so let’s overhaul it and make it better…rather than trying to build an entirely new car around an armrest and a gas cap.

      • artem1s

        No one with enough organizing chops to actually make it happen wants the headache of forming a third party. The problem is that our political rules are extremely vulnerable to grifters. People who can actually organize are going to be drawn to an established system because they actually want to get stuff done. Con men and grifters promise a quick end run around that system and the rubes get sucked in every time. Perot came the closest and then Buchanan shut that right down because it was messing with the GOP grifting the libetarian arm of the GOP. It’s been that way for decades now and it’s only getting worse now that the 24 hours news cycle has decided to get in on the profit. Excise taxes on excessive campaign expenditures and donations might be an answer. But YOOGE amounts of money have been injected into the cycle and the grifters are coming out of the woodwork to get in on the action. They won’t go away until the money moves somewhere else.

    • artem1s

      grifters gotta grift.

  • Recipriversexclusons

    Despot Donnie, on hearing about Steven Wessel’s success, is considering him for either Secretary of Commerce or Secretary of Treasury. DD sez he’ll decide based on how well Wessel does in “Apprentice, Trumphouse Oval office”.
    When asked for comment, Despot Donnie replied, “I know a good scammer businessman when I see one. He’s the best, I’m the bestly. What have you got to lose?

    • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

      Stephen Wessel?!? Oh God. Soon they’ll be writing a song about him.
      Why not hire Steven Hess and Stephen Goebbels while you’re at it.

      • eggsacklywright

        Chekov says: “Keptin, it’s a Kardassian Wessel!”

  • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

    Someone needs to come up with lyrics for “The Purple Rose of Texas.”

    • Good_Gawd_Yall

      Did you know that you can sing most of Emily Dickenson’s poems to the tune of “The Yellow Rose of Texas”? Try it!
      “Apparently with no surprise
      to any happy flower
      the frost beheads it at its play
      in accidental power.
      The blonde assassin passes on
      The sun proceeds, unmoved,
      to measure out another day
      for an approving God.”

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        That’s…awful. I love Emily Dickinson, and I am not happy to have that thought in my head.

        • Good_Gawd_Yall

          Sorry – that’s how I memorized that poem for a class waaaaaaay back in grad school!

          • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

            I forgive you, I guess.

      • eka

        i heard that years ago on wait wait don’t tell me and emily dickinson is now ruined for me.

        • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

          Well, let’s see:

          For each ecstatic instant
          We must an anguish pay
          In keen and quivering ratio
          To the Ecstasy.

          For each beloved hour
          Sharp pittances of years,
          Bitter contested farthings
          And coffers heaped with tears.

          Nope, still good :-)

      • Malaclypse

        Guess that means you can sing “The Yellow Rose of Texas” to the tune of Gilligan’s Isle as well?

        • MrCanoehead

          And you can sing the Gilligan’s Island theme to Amazing Grace.

      • Amy!

        I’d only used it with “Because I could not stop for death,” but it’s nice to know it’s universal.

      • kareemachan

        That’s nuthin’. You can sing ‘Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening’ to the tune of ‘Hernando’s Hideaway’.

    • tehbaddr

      All I can think of when you mention “The Purple Rose of Texas”, is prolapse pr0n! EEEEWWWWWW!

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        That’s just nasty…

  • Duke

    Melania Trump is a whore.

    Many people are saying it.

    • tehbaddr

      I read it on the intertubes, Must be true!

    • Candy Apple

      I have heard this, too.

    • tehbaddr

      It’s all over the Google. People are looking into it.

      • Grizz1y

        I wrote read on the internet that she attended the KGBs Sparrow School.

    • chicken thief

      *counting change found in the couch cushions*

      Lemme know when she slides down to “cheap whore” level….

      • Grizz1y

        Eww. I wouldn’t even sit in a chair that had been used by Deadbeat Donnie.

    • Bernarda Alba

      We know she sells herself for money because she’s Trump’s consort.

  • Bill Slider

    The story that Mrs Donald Trump might have been a hooker before she became just another trophy wife of some old geezer, is not the story. The story, is she competes with the Donald for column inches with the magnanimous dumpster fire, and that makes him so jealous. It reminds me of all those oil wells on fire in Kuwait during the First Gulf war, multiple dumpster fires polluting the environment.

  • Usedtobeyellerdawg

    My debt checks in on me monthly, just to bum a few bills. Once I came around to the conclusion that dying in debt means you get away with a lot of free shit, I felt better though.

  • Candy Apple

    Obama didn’t make FEMA that great if I’m not head guard at a FEMA camp right now! I polished my jackboots repeatedly over the years for NOTHING!

  • limberrat

    Oh Jill Stein, you make me laugh bigly with how incompetent your campaign is.

  • Spotts1701

    Oh, crap – Bill O’Reilly is onto us! He tweeted out yesterday that it’s unpossible for the U.S. to be discriminatory against minorities because, well, if we were so discriminatory how come we won so many medals at the Olympics?!? Hmm?
    https://twitter.com/oreillyfactor/status/767840916707024899

    • bubbuhh

      The important thing is Ryan Lochte and friends are white. So, pfft! No discrimination there, move along.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      He has got to be the stupidest man in the entire world.

      • Bub the Leftwing Zombie

        Hannity: “Nuh UH!!”

      • jmk

        Jim Hoft – “challenge accepted.”

    • Amy!

      Shouldn’t his signature include the third letter from his last name, not just the first two? It would be more accurate.

      • Paperless Tiger

        How about BORE?

  • bubbuhh

    For those who are interested, here’s what Melanoma is threatening to sue over.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3749919/The-racy-photos-troubling-questions-Donald-Trump-s-wife.html

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      You know, why would she even bother? Who cares? Meh. More publicity BS to stay in the media eye without having to give interviews.

  • rosenbomb

    OT: I saw some troublesome wingnut bumper stickers on a truck while driving into work. One sticker said “Gun Control Made the Holocaust Possible: NO MORE NAZI GUN CONTROL LAWS.” His other sticker said “Gun Control is NOT KOSHER” with a Start of David surrounded by some weapons.

    He also had a Ben Carson 2016 sticker.

    • mancityfooty .

      great, that’s all we need now.
      Nazi guns.
      jebus help us

      • phoenix00

        “Yahweh help us”

        FTFY

    • Señor Skwerl

      Probably this guy: http://jpfo.org/

      • Ghenghis McCann

        Brain bleach, Stat.

      • SDGeoff

        Just from first glance, you know it’s a rwnj site. Yuck.

      • rosenbomb

        You’re right! The weird Star of David thing I referenced is definitely the same as that logo. I didn’t know this organization existed, but I can’t say I’m surprised.

  • bookish
    • jmk

      Well of course they did, bless their hearts.

  • TeeRaak

    Melania Trump is not now–nor has ever been–the basic equivalent of a “happy hooker”.

    There’s no proof Melania has ever been happy.
    https://media4.giphy.com/media/l46C7X7h54JXm23YY/200w_d.gif

  • chicken thief

    Oh, sure, Barry HUSSEIN O’Bamz will head to Loozy-anna now that the greens have dried out.

    • jmk

      Drumpf is taking credit for “shaming” Bamz into going.

      If he makes me eye-roll and facepalm any harder, Imma have to charge him with assault.

  • Doug Langley

    Yikes, the news is sure depressing. Needz kitteh, STAT!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lydVMWcH0lc

    • bookish

      Intrepid kitty= happy pup.

  • I Only Like Cats

    I think we should be funding MAGNET schools (so that they can ahadccept more troubled students… I would’ve loved that) and other alternative public schools (that aren’t getting enough funding because of charters) so that kids can go at their own pace and get the help they need rather than shelling out money to businesses. I looked up the charter school I went to one year (never, ever again) and the only story I could find about it was a girl being suspended for shaving her hair, to show support for a friend with cancer. (The dress code is incredibly long because the first high school class had tried to find ways to express their individuality with the uniforms and the school had a hissy fit because of the “disrespect” and “rebellion”.)

  • eddi

    Trump doesn’t want to go to meet black people. That’s OK. Black people don’t want to go to Trump rallies anyway.

  • Jeff in the desert

    It is INTERNET DAY!!!!!! 25th anniversary. Too bad our comments don’t exist to celebrate.

  • calliecallie

    John Oliver is lovely, but I can’t watch all that nonsense about those charter schools.

    • Skadi

      I agree with him mostly, which is why I’m so chagrined to be looking for a job at a charter school now…

      • efoveks

        This could be an opportunity to make a difference where one is desperately needed. Also too, best of luck on the job search! May your road to success be a short and productive one. :)

  • OneYieldRegular

    What, no story about how the GOP’s Ron Johnson wants to eliminate teachers and just have kids watch Ken Burns videos in order to get an education? Evidently Ron Johnson has no idea who Ken Burns is, because Ken Burns buried Trump at his commencement speech at Stanford in June.

    • Bernarda Alba

      He’s so behind the times! Just give each classroom a computer and let the kids take turns on it. There’s lots of free educational stuff on the internet!

      • Jamoche

        But no Wifi, that rots their brains!
        No YA fiction, either – that brought down the Roman Empire.

        • jmhm

          Probably just as well. The roman vampires are all Catholics, at least according to Twilight.

  • Me not sure

    As a Georgia Democrat I am so glad that Jill Stein didn’t make it onto the ballot and Gary Johnson did. This might be the first time since Bill Clinton that Georgia goes red.

  • bookish
    • tehbaddr

      Yeah we covered that below, and it’s in the morning round-up.

  • ExecutorElassus

    Are you’uns going to have our Editrix post a long-form thinkpiece about the recent demise of Are Wonket’s old nursery and benefactor, later kinda-nemesis, the recently-deceased Gawker?
    I was here back before Ken Layne took over, right after Ana Marie Cox left, and got to watch all the weird wish-ah-knew-howta-quit-you goings-on between the Wonkers and the Gawkers. Kinda sad to see them crushed by some man-baby tech-bro billionaire with a grudge, but also kinda hoping some of their better commentators will come here.

  • Paperless Tiger

    I thought they said he QUINTUPLED the rent, but who’s counting? I guess he wants to recoup all the ‘self-funding’. So that’s another big lie for Trump, but again, who’s counting?

    • Khavrinen

      “another big lie for Trump, but again, who’s counting?”
      Count all of Trump’s lies?! Do numbers GO that high?

  • kareemachan

    ‘Green Party presidential nominee Jill Stein won’t be on Georgia’s presidential ballot this November after the state said the party had too few verified signatures on its petition. The news comes a month after the Green Party submitted what it said was more than 1,600 pages of signatures by the state’s July 12 deadline. Party officials had not been sure of the
    number of signatures, but they estimated it had been more than 10,000. ‘

    You know, somebody should point out to the Greenies that if they actually ran in other races than just the presidential one, they might have enough experience to do these things correctly.

  • Recipriversexclusons

    President Obama’s Zachary Louisiana presser is available on C-Span now.

    https://www.c-span.org/video/?414274-1/president-obama-visits-baton-rouge-louisiana

  • bookish

    Wingsuit flyer crashes, dies.

    I can’t feel sorry for him. I only hope he didn’t leave any little ones behind. He lived and died doing what he loved, and it was phenomenal.

    http://nbcnews.to/2bRi0ez

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