SHARE

Poor murder weapon has to wait to find a new home.
Poor murder weapon has to wait to find a new home.

[Update: New development; see end of post] Oh, hi, America’s sociopaths, looks like you’re just going to have to wait for another chance to bid on George Zimmerman’s turgid child-killing muscle. The auction site for the 9mm handgun Zimmerman used to shoot Trayvon Martin dead now displays only a dead link for that particular item:

gunbroker error message

It’s unclear why the listing was removed from the auction site, Gunbroker.com, or whether the sale was cancelled by the site (very likely) or by George Zimmerman himself (are you kidding?). It’s almost as if the gun dealer didn’t want to be associated with the most beautiful, iconic artifact of the right to self defense (or prosecutorial incompetence) in American history, for some reason. We’re sure someone is working on one beauty of a carefully worded statement at this very moment.

Also, not that anyone would be the least bit surprised to find George Zimmerman lying through his teeth, it turns out the Smithsonian Institution had absolutely no interest in acquiring the Kel-Tec 9mm, no sir, no way, no matter what Zimmerman said in his sales pitch. The Smithsonian clarified the matter in a hurry on Twitter:

smithsonian zimmerman tweet

Perhaps Zimmerman was thinking of a different institution, such as the Grifty Child-Shooter Media Whore Hall of Fame. We can see how he might be slightly confused about that.

If you still feel the need to spend too much money on an item that screams “I am a raging moron,” you can still bid on the 2014 National Rifle Association Black Ops Jeep Wrangler, currently going at the low, low price of $52,225.

NRA black ops jeep

You’ll have to find your own unarmed black teenager to make the purchase a truly historic artifact, however, and you should know going into it that the Smithsonian probably won’t want it.

Update: Another online gun shop with no sense of shame or decency has now made the gun available for auction again. USA. USA.

[ABC News / NYDN Update: RawStory]

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
  • Lizzietish81

    Ted Nugent is very sad.

    • Malmborg Implano

      I’m sure if he made him a direct offer he’d happily sell it to him.

  • Nounverb911
  • Hemp Dogbane

    In solidarity with Mr. Zimmerman I am auctioning a bag of Skittles, and I guarantee the item will sell.

  • Spotts1701

    you can still bid on the 2014 National Rifle Association Black Ops Jeep Wrangler, currently going at the low, low price of $52,225

    Perfect for the sovereign citizen who needs to fend off urban assault. (Note: They would never take it off-road.)

    • PubOption

      It has a tow bracket on the front, so probably not very reliable.

      • Nounverb911

        That’s for towing it behind Wonkabagoes.
        (Extra ‘e’ in honor of Dan Quayl).

        • Major_Major_Major

          I’m impressed with the e’s at which you pulled that off.

    • Scooby

      It says Black…right there on the car! They are afraid the cops will shoot it.

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      They might take off road if they’re drunk and hankerin’ to shoot some nearly extinct fish in a national park.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      This is what I love about people driving civilianized HMMWVs. It’s massive overkill for just tooling down to the Kroger.

      • CJTX

        I got to drive an Army one on a military contractor job…us newbies were excited! The one vet on the team at the time said, “Yeah, the novelty wears off pretty fast.” He was right. I hated that fucker – give me a Dodge Caravan anytime. Sure, the Humvee can go anywhere….at 5 mph. I also picked the one with “air condtioning” – which should be called “blowing hot, sandy air all over the cab”.

    • SnarkOff

      Can it be modified to roll coal?

      • Jay Vaughn

        Think about how small of a dick you’d need to be caught dead in that monstrosity. It already does.

    • bupkus23

      The only question in my mind is who paid whom for the advertising? Did the NRA pay Fiat Chrysler to put their name on that Jeep, or did they make a big donation to the NRA in order to court the douchebro market??

      Inquiring minds want to know!

      • wavicles

        We’ll never know, it’s blackops.

      • Querolous

        Jeep is owned by FIAT. Fiat is an Italian Company. Rome is in Italy. The RC HQ is in Rome. The RC is controlled by the Illuminati. QED: NRA = Illuminati!!!111¡¡¡ Wake up sheeple!!!111¡¡¡

  • Lizzietish81

    When does the sidewalk Travon attacked Zimmerman with come up for sale?

    • coozledad

      That tiny space between his eyes should henceforward be referred to as a Zimmerman.

      Example:George W. Bush has one and a quarter Zimmermans.

  • OneYieldRegular

    Hasn’t this human shit stain had another run-in with the law yet that will put him behind bars forever?

    • Nounverb911

      No, but he’s still trying.

    • YourNameHere

      The guy who is trying to kill him also appears to still be trying. with votes.

      • cynmac

        Unfortunately, he peed on a neighbor’s front door and the bond was revoked. True Story. He’s behind bars.

    • hollydturner

      Conjuring OJ! I’m not a witch (although some would argue) but I’m still conjuring up the OJ scenario with a vengeance. Come on witches spell! Work already!

  • YourNameHere

    In his defense I was also chased by a child this morning while his parents yelled TOMMY NO and it was terrifying…ly adorable.

  • PubOption

    The Crime Museum has closed, so they obviously can’t have been interested.
    http://www.crimemuseum.org/

    • YourNameHere

      The Death Museum is still open.

      • Kavefish

        Are they taking volunteers? Are they taking *nominations* for volunteers? If so then, By George, I think we have someone they should talk to!

  • YourNameHere

    Ahhh looking at the Jeep is blocked because guns. I am now sadfaced.

  • Scooby

    Not Smithsonian Museum… Smith & Wesson Museum.

  • hollydturner

    This is why I was doing my happy twirly dance earlier! Eat shit Zimmerman!!11!!11!

  • Pinkham’s Law

    I don’t know if it’s worth $52k, but that’s a pretty sweet Jeep. It’d be even sweeter after you took all the nasty graphics off, though.

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      Black Ops Matter?

    • Blank Ron

      I wonder if it’s one of those Jeeps that has the sticker that says, ‘Do not drive off road’?

  • Lady Bug

    As someone who is both anti shooting kids and pro Smithsonian, this story has me very mad!

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    the only way to stop a bad guy with a gun auction…

    • data_ninja

      I’m tired of all of these auction movie fantasies that these gun nuts keep pretending to live in!

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “But please enjoy our many other fine weapons available for purchase on this internet site, because, what could go wrong?”

  • jmhm

    Maybe the Henry Ford Museum will take it. They have the JFK assassination car, Edison’s last breath, and the first McDonalds. I’m sure it would fit right in.

    • Nounverb911

      Along with Lindbergh’s swastika?

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        His lesser known plane, “The Spirit of Ferguson.”

        • cynmac

          Lindbergh’s plane is actually at the Smithsonian. Sux on that Zimmerman!

      • jmhm

        I think the dingo was framed, myself.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      It’s true. Edison’s breath was so bad it killed an elephant once. They framed AC current for it afterward.

      • jmhm

        It’s incredibly creepy. Ford thought that the soul left the body in the last breath, so he paid off the doctors to imprison his best friend in a test tube for eternity. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7873498607b2b16e1b6c65da49dac83343aa7e0bda9d51bf8913516be8d0739a.jpg

        • YourNameHere

          Awesome. Now I have something way funnier to threaten my best friend with the next time she does something horrible.

        • Blank Ron

          It’s actually Nikola Tesla’s last breath. Edison stole it and claimed it was his.

        • bobbert

          This did actually lead to a pretty good Tim Powers novel.

    • Malmborg Implano

      They also have Rosa Parks’ bus.

      • jmhm

        Startling, isn’t it? I’m sure where ever Ford’s last breath is, he’s _pissed_. We’re talking about a man who named the company town he built for african american employees “Inkster,” here.

      • cynmac

        Wait, What? They have an Oscar Mayer Wienermobile AND the rocking chair from Ford’s Theatre in which President Abraham Lincoln was sitting when he was shot! If I’m ever in Dearborn, MI, I know where I’m going! Looks more interesting than the Ripley’s museum in Gatlingberg and the Black Civil War museum in DC. Not as good as the Spy museum in DC, perhaps. Or the Salvador Dali in Tampa.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    That Black Ops Wrangler just screams “dickhead” at you at Rolls Royce jet engine decibel levels.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      the judges would also accept ‘Douchebro’

    • h4rr4r

      Needs a monster sticker.
      I can assure you it will never see dirt.

      • borninatrailer

        Ahh, the Monster sticker. This decade’s No Fear.

        • h4rr4r

          The driver will be wearing those jeans with the crap sewed on. It’s like ass sequins for douchebags.

        • cynmac

          Afflicted Libelz!1!!!!

  • 24601

    I thought black ops were by their nature covert. They don’t just run around advertising their mission like a 1999 Honda Accord with a Domino’s sign on the roof.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      We are talking about people to whom “military left” means their right foot.

    • clubseal

      It’s not as subtle as a decal that says, “Not Black Ops”.

      • 24601

        Or the “My other car is a black helicopter” bumper sticker.

    • Sakonyachen

      Actually, in a few years, I’m sure we will probably see some kind of fast food or snack food adverts on all our military equipment. Free market and all. Can’t have tax dollars being wasted on military equipment for soldiers after all. The boot camps will be run by Body By Jake and P90X in conjunction with Browning and Smith and Wesson. TWA will run our Air Force and Carnival Cruises will be our Navy. This way, instead of spending trillions on government run military, we can funnel quadrillions to the companies the lobbyists represent.

  • Callyson

    Zimmerman said in an interview with a Florida TV station that he wanted to do the auction to “move past the firearm.”

    “I know how you feel: that’s what I wanted to do!”

    – Trayvon Martin

  • chimichanga

    No snark. Just a sick, sick feeling. And big sads. Puppies, kittens, snarky, clever Zimmermemes, please.

    • SnarkOff

      Don’t be sad! Someone out there had sense enough to shut this whole thing down. That is good news.

    • thewitchqueen74

      Here you go :)

    • Spotts1701

      Sleepy leopard kitten is GO

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUKnsmToA6U

      • chimichanga

        Aaawwwwwwwwwww. Thank you!

    • marxalot

      I bring you…. HEDGIES!

      • YourNameHere

        I want them all. The hedgies.

    • HogeyeGrex

      Boneless kitty?

      • bobbert

        Stair surfing.

  • Bitter Scribe

    I expect a Congressional hearing on the Smithsonian’s discriminatory procurement policies any day now.

    • lucidamente

      And why it’s not trending on Facebook.

      • SnarkOff

        SMITHSONIANGHAZI!!!

    • cynmac

      They have Monica’s blue dress tho.

  • SnarkOff

    If Zimmerman were a woman, this would be the point at which she’d start her career in porn.

    • 24601

      Perhaps he and Kim Davis could work on a project.

      • thewitchqueen74

        Oh god no. Just…no.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        All the Viagra and Cialis on the planet will not remedy that.

        • 24601

          You’re welcome. :)

      • SnarkOff

        They could call it “Permanent Lifelong Boner Killer.”

      • 24601

        “Ground Round and Pounded” could be the working title.

        • Zippy W Pinhead

          *oukes*

        • Parakeetist

          Nooooooooooo

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      Or Foxy Boxing. Or both.

    • BigBoppa

      Act 1 scene 1: (George approaches goat from behind) “That’s it my dear… stand your ground” (unzips slowly) “This will only take a minute…”

    • Jonny On Maui

      He’s run out of painting money, He’s willing to sell his penis replacement. Hard times in gay male porn are just around the corner…

  • btwbfdimho

    Mmm, who could be interested?
    Marco Rubio bought a firearm last Christmas, to defend his family.

    What about a well-deserved present for Rafael Cruz?

  • laineypc

    I was thinking that maybe someone from Anonymous could “buy” it but then reroute the money to the Trayvon Martin foundation and then Anonymous could take the gun, smash it to little bits on camera, melt it down and make it into a barbed dildo and return it to George with suggestions on what he could do with it. (And if that goes against commenting rules for non-commenters I promise to not do it again, it’s just that Zimmerman has no soul, so I figure we could make an exception.)

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “We’re not sorry that link is dead. We consider it self defense.”

    — The Internet

    • HogeyeGrex

      Quoth the server, “404.”

      • GoutMachine

        Slow clap. Needs moar upsy arrowz.

        • HogeyeGrex

          Totally swiped from bash.

  • btwbfdimho

    The blood-stained sidewalk tiles will soon be on display at the NRA Asshall of Infame.

  • Bitter Scribe

    The thing that pissed me off most about the trial was the endless picking on one of the chief prosecution witnesses, the young woman who was on the phone to Martin just before he got shot. All we heard about was how she was overweight, couldn’t read cursive writing, didn’t use proper English and every other fucking irrelevant snarky thing every wingnut shithead could think of.

    • SnarkOff

      American justice.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      The Department of Redundancy Department informs you that you are now on their watch list for the use of “wingnut shithead”.

    • cynmac

      The girl was from Haiti and English is her second language so it was really more cruel than that, also too.

    • AngryBlakGuy

      …hello, sleepy head! Welcome to America! Where when the victim is “black” they are on trial!!! I’m not sure where you live, but here in Florida it was about as disgusting as it could get!!! It was bad, that is all I can say. Sometimes I wish we could burn it down and start over

      • Sakonyachen

        Wait!

        You live in Florida?

        Why aren’t you MurderouslyFuriousBlakGuy?

        Angry seems a bit tame for what life must be like for you.

        • AngryBlakGuy

          …I’ve been trying to keep a “low” profile lately

          • Sakonyachen

            Probably the best plan. Even though the fact that you have to do it makes me MurderouslyFuriousWhytGuy! Then again those Hardee’s commercials with black people eating fried chicken at the park with bad R&B in the background sent me into an anti-racist tirade that makes Nat Turner look like Andrew Jackson. So there’s that.

          • AngryBlakGuy

            …lol, same here

  • Callyson

    Slightly OT, but an interesting link in the NYDN link:

    White men killed more American police than any other group this year, but conservatives won’t address the facts

    Huh, I wonder why that is…

    • 24601

      White Lies Matter

      • Nounverb911

        Didn’t #DipshitDonnie say that?

        • nmmagyar

          Not out loud. Yet.

      • Antonin Dvorak

        #AllLiesMatter

    • hollydturner

      Facts simply aren’t their friend. In point of fact they simply hate facts.

      • Vecciojohn LLC

        “Facts are stupid things.”

        • Villago Delenda Est

          — Shitty grade Z movie star

        • hollydturner

          Like totally!

        • Stupid facts. Be less facty.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Lessee now..79% of all the cops killed this year were killed by white men who probably had absent fathers.

      What? No?

      Geeze the narrative really takes a beating when you look at it with some degree of critical thinking skills, n’est ce pas?

      • Malmborg Implano

        There’s absent and then there’s absent.

    • MsAnthropesMr

      Won’t someone do something on white on cop crime?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      “It’s true, it’s true! We’re so lameviolent!”

      — Homer Simpson

    • TheBidenator

      Hahaha Callyson you’re so adorable…white guys can’t be murderous thugs. I’m sure there is another reason like Obama sending the cops after them forcing them to defend their lives…

  • Gorillionaire

    If Zimmy was going to give his money to anyone, it was going to be to the Keep George Zimmerman Job Free And On Perpetual Vacation fund.

  • Fitzgerald Chesterfield

    I guess he’ll have to put it on craigslist.

    • Nounverb911

      Larry Craig’s list?

      • mardam422

        I think even Larry would take a stance (wide) against that.

      • nmmagyar

        Say what you will, but that cop was hot enough to warrant offering a hummer to

        • Blank Ron

          Or at least a tricked-out Jeep.

          • nmmagyar

            I am obviously in the minority here, but I like the Jeep

    • MsAnthropesMr

      As someone who has sold plenty of merchandise on Craigslist, he deserves all the assholes that will call and ask for financing.

      • Fitzgerald Chesterfield

        Not to mention the people who will think he’s selling sex acts.

        • MsAnthropesMr

          Thaaats never happened for the stuff I sell. thank doG. But I mostly sell musical instruments, so I just get people who want payment plans and to ask I will sell it for 30% of fair value.

          • bobbert

            Payment plans. Hahahahaha.

  • borninatrailer

    That Jeep looks like a pretty good vehicle to shoot some teenagers in after they don’t turn down their music and then drive it to go get some pizza.

    • h4rr4r

      I think that jeep is more douche bro and shooty mcshootter. For that you need a rusty F150 with tons of ring wing stickers.

      • ahughes798

        That crazy ex-cop(Sheriff? Police Chief?) from Pennsyltucky would look good in that thing. As it rolls off a cliff……

  • Jay Vaughn

    A company whose entire reason for being is getting guns into the hands of people who shouldn’t be able to get them thinks that’s to sleazy to do. Fuck you.

  • Vecciojohn LLC

    Is there a Museum of Institutionalized Racism? Maybe they could do something with it.

    • nmmagyar

      Any museum with the word “heritage” prolly fits that description

    • BigBoppa

      North Carolina, South Carolina, Mississippi and Alabama are fighting for the rights as we speak. Kentucky thought they were in the running but got the Ark Encounter by mistake.

    • wavicles

      Yes there is, they call it Mississippi

  • Indiepalin

    This is bad new for the estate of John Wilkes Booth

  • MrBlobfish

    That Jeep is a penis extension on wheels.

    • marxalot

      But does it come with the cigarette-lighter powered attachment?

  • onedollarjuana

    I thought “black ops” weren’t supposed to be obvious.

    • BigBoppa

      Yeah…and militias were supposed to be well regulated too. Funny how that turned out.

      • Candy Apple

        Article I, Section 8 says the militia is called, armed, trained and disciplined by Congress. Article II, Section 2 states the militia is commanded by the President.

        Hahahaha, wingnuts. If you own a firearm and are not part of a militia that is commanded by the President, you’re in violation of your beloved Second Amendment.

        • GoutMachine

          Now there’s a Clayton Bigsby Part Deux sketch waiting to happen…

    • TheBidenator

      It’s mall-ninja style ‘black ops’ that involves telling EVERYONE you were in Delta force to sound tough….

    • Gleem-McShinez

      Whoever buys that, you can guarantee it’s not just his “ops” that aren’t black.

  • Joshua Norton

    Nice Jeep. Does it come with an optional gun turret?

    • PubOption

      Technically, one should be available.

  • TheGrandWaz00
  • dslindc

    Good.

  • Joshua Norton

    I found the perfect customer for a super-secret Jeep with “Black Ops” scrawled across the side of it:
    .

  • Candy Apple

    #sorrynotsorry, wingnuts — THE FREE MARKET HAS SPOKEN!

  • ZIMMERMAN BEGIN AGAIN DEPT.

    In honor of this tragic news here’s a reprint of my Longfellowish Zimmerman tribute:

    I shot my Kel-Tec PF-9
    It felled a kid, but that’s just fine;
    Uppity, he looked at me,
    And brandished Skittles and Sweet Tea.

    I breathed the ‘N-Word’ in the air,
    And viewed his hoodie as a dare;
    He was tougher than I thought
    As he made me eat asphalt.

    I’m the victim you’ll agree
    Like-minded folks praise me with glee;
    My noble gun deserves a shrine
    Until some jerk buys it online.

  • starfanglednut

    Wtf? He kept the fucking gun?!?

    • I know, right? I thought it would be in a police storage place forever, as “evidence”.

      • Antonin Dvorak

        His original post said it was recently returned to him by the DOJ; and his lawyer fought valiantly against the DOJ destroying it.

    • atheistinafoxhole

      Never throw away the murder weapon. It could be worth money some day.

      • Blank Ron

        If I’d known that I never would have tossed that crowbar in the Saugeen River. Damn.

  • Obviously, GunBroker .com just hates the Second Amendment.

  • TheBidenator

    Thanks for ruining Jeep forever for me, NRA!

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      it’s only at 52k? Is that an auction? Because I knew gunhumpin fundie wingnuts were tightasses, but DAMN.

  • TheBidenator

    Well George it looks like your smoke wagon is just going to have to find another home…might I suggest Ted Nugent? He’s a racist enough fuckface to want it and if you throw in a 13 year old girl he’ll give you 5k for it.

  • TheBidenator

    By the way, that Jeep is butt ugly. I like Jeeps but seriously, it’s like a Trump jeep that’s entirely gold colored and overloaded with his T name jizz. Gun humpers are fucking tools…

    • Iam Reading

      It ruined jeeps for me, and I didn’t think that could happen

  • TheBidenator

    So the website stood it’s ground and shot George Zimmerman’s attempt to grift dead….others could hear the grift clearly pleading for its life just before the fatal shooting but obviously the website was defending itself and this was not murder.

    Also, go fuck yourself with an red hot poker George…then fuck off the Earth as you’re using up the oxygen supply we don’t need you using.

    • Iam Reading

      And when gravity pull you down to earth and turns you into Zman ash, your ashes should fuck off too

  • The Other Tim

    Nothing says “Black Ops” like the words “Black Ops” in giant letters for everyone to see.

  • snigsy

    Good.

  • NotConvinced

    Is it beneath Child Killer George’s new found celebrity status to sell the gun in a parking lot at a gun show like everybody else? Crikey!

  • Joy

    I can’t believe there are still human beings with beating hearts in their chests that defend this offensive dirtbag.

  • coozledad

    No surprise there. Pathetic fuck couldn’t auction off his actual dick, either.

    • LaylaOhGee

      Well, you can’t sell what you don’t have.

  • OneDemin EOr

    That pathetically self-important puke needs to load that handgun with votes, put it in his purse in the backseat, and offer to drive someone’s toddler to preschool.

  • tegrat

    Nothin’ sez I’m in the “Black Ops” better than having it painted on the side a yer ride, amirite?

    • JustDon’tSayDittos

      That reminded me of a song – posting it up top.

  • YayConspiracy

    Every time this piece of walking smegma is in the news Trayvon’s parents must go through hell again. I wish Mr. Martin a really long bout of insomnia and an unquenchable thirst.

    • Kavefish

      (don’t you mean Mr. Zimmerman?)

      • YayConspiracy

        Yes, of course! thank you, I fixed it!

  • Iam Reading

    Not only is this murderer a pussy for bringing a gun to a stalking-induced fist fight, he brought a POS penis proxy, the Kel-Tec 9mm. Kel-tec, for when you want to be a little murdering bitch, but don’t want quality or expense to get in the way.

    • bookish

      Points for little murdering bitch.

      • nightmoth

        Points for stalking-induced fist fight.

    • Courser

      I wasn’t going to say anything, but Kel-tec guns are total cheap-ass pieces of shit. I wouldn’t have one of those things if you paid me. My dad bought a cute little Kel-Tec .380 and it chewed the fuck out of my palm when I fired it (it was at an authorized gun range so very responsible). I was glad that the thing was dad’s not mine.

      • ahughes798

        They might be cheap, but unfortunately, they work as intended. My sister says they’re shit guns, too.

  • redarmyzombie

    Dok…Editrix…Can’t we suspend the commenting rules for radicals, just this once, for George Zimmerman? If anyone deserves something stronger than a theoretical drive-by of votes more than this piece of human garbage, I’d be hard pressed to think of a better candidate…Can I at least hope his balls get gnawed off by a pack of wolverines?

    • brucej

      Why would you wish such a fate on poor inoffensive wolverines :-( They might get shithead poisoning doing that.

      • wavicles

        Not Honey Badger, he don’t give a shit!

    • doktorzoom

      You know what, for this waste of perfectly good carbon molecules, I’m actually OK with outrageously over the top stuff like wolverines. It’s the obsessively detailed scenarios of torture and rape that I find disturbing. Prison rape ain’t funny, and I’ve already deleted at least one comment on that.

  • Gleem-McShinez

    “The Smithsonian thing isn’t true? I’m wondering if the guy might lie about other things!”

    Said no Florida Juror. Unfortunately.

    • Squirrel_t_robot

      Zimmerman is a lying sack of shit who stalked a teenage boy for the non crime of walking.

      Zimmerman acted like a child molester; I always figured he propositioned Martin, BTW.

  • Squirrel_t_robot

    The Smithsonian has had quite a busy day on Twitter.

    • Jonny On Maui

      As I am a twit but don’t tweet I’m imagining they’re getting it from both sides…

      • Squirrel_t_robot

        Stay away! Every time I get involved on Twitter, some jack ass libertarian or out and proud fascist goes to war with me.

        With Tweets!

        • Jonny On Maui

          I am an old. I don’t facebook. I don’t tweet. And as that young man said on ‘The Nightly”, I was around before the internet. I know how to turn my phone off and do so from time to time…

          But this stuff is fun to watch…

          • ahughes798

            As an old, I find Twitter confusing.

  • kareemachan

    “Mr. Zimmerman never contacted anyone at GunBroker.com prior to or after
    the listing was created and no one at GunBroker.com has any
    relationship with Zimmerman,” GunBroker.com said in a statement.
    “Our site rules state that we reserve the right to reject listings at
    our sole discretion, and have done so with the Zimmerman listing. We
    want no part in the listing on our web site or in any of the publicity
    it is receiving.”

    • Jonny On Maui

      Was that issued before or after the shitstorm started?

      • nmmagyar

        After. They hoped it would fly under the radar (and they’d get their cut)

  • Brewerofbeers
    • Markuserektus

      I seems that sellers post their own ads. The last auction was short on time when it was linked here. Zimmerman is a totally repulsive person (a stretch on person hood) and has not a whit of morals. I don’t want to sit here and soak in negative energy about the moran. Given his track record, he’ll get in over his head on something and it will consume him.

    • doktorzoom

      Thanks, article updated. Also, sigh…..

      • Brewerofbeers

        We will see how long this one lasts, before bad publicity causes them to pull it and interweb conservatives start crying about “free speach. “

    • cynmac

      This makes me wanna hurl:

      The auction is now being held by on the United Gun Group website. Per TMZ:

      “A spokesperson for unitedgungroup.com says he got in touch with Zimmerman through a mutual friend once the initial listing was removed. He tells us unitedgungroup.com’s stance on the controversial item is if it’s legal, they have no objections and it ‘comes down to a moral decision for George to do what he wants with his property.’”

      • Roadstergal

        George hasn’t made a moral decision in his life.

  • Jgb979

    It’s almost like wingnuts might not actually make the most financially prudent decisions.

    I’m betting the real black ops travel around in a 10 mile per gallon penis extending jeep hummerzine like the A-team.

    • Jonny On Maui

      You wouldn’t give their car a second look. That’s the point…

      • therblig

        say what you will about the libyans, they knew how to be (mostly) inconspicuous.

    • Markuserektus

      Mr. T drove a black GMC van though…

    • Courser

      A couple of years ago I attended a seminar in Breckenridge, CO. There was a convoy of SuperDuty trucks kitted out with ballistic fabric ALL over them. The drivers even stayed at the same hotel I did, but I have no idea what all the black ballistic fabric is about. Maybe keep them off the radar? Specifically? All the chrome and everything was covered up.

      They removed some of the ballistic stuff at the hotel and they were plain, white SuperDuty trucks. Course we have a LOT of military in CO so who knows?

  • Blanche Beecham

    This whole Zimmerman thing is just gross.

  • So how long until he’s on DANCING WITH THE “STARS”?

    • chiefkurtz

      He’s going to fuck that Ted Cruz looking gal for sexuallyturnedoffpermanentlycom

      • blondeiq

        Please post llama pictures.

    • malsperanza

      He’s already the grand champion Biggest Loser.

    • Rick Hill

      He’s already picked out his song. Only hold up is Bristol hasn’t returned his calls:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3plBzBB8LE8

  • handyhippie65

    i don’t know. i say let him sell it, and confiscate the money and give it to martin’s parents. at least some good may come from it.

    • malsperanza

      That could only happen if the Martins filed a wrongful death lawsuit. Given that he successfully claimed self-defense, they wouldn’t win, even with the lower standard of proof.

      Trayvon if officially the perp. That’s how evil the stand your ground law is. It really is a license to vigilantes.

      • handyhippie65

        way to make me hate humanity even more, thanx a lot.

  • Parakeetist

    The NRA are huge assholes, but that’s a neat Jeep. If I bought it, I’d have to get an exorcism for it.

    • mrpuma2u

      You could always re-paint it with flowers and spotted owls and then email them after you fixed it.

      • Parakeetist

        Aha! Thankey.

  • whitroth

    Hey, you need to expand that name, so we can include others who haven’t yet shot children or grownups, but are just waiting their chance.

    Then we could add Ted Nougat, and Tits Fiore, and the Bundys, and the Duggouts, and they’d all be in *one* place at the same time….

    mark “ok, who fired that 5.5″ cannon on that USS Destroyer, it wasn’t supposed to be fired while aimed at the shore….”

    • ahughes798

      Much as I loathe the Diddlers, I don’t think they’re violent, or physically dangerous. I would replace the Diddlers with…Sean Hannity.

  • Tommmcatt

    Hopefully this attempted sale of Zimmerman’s favorite loathesome mastubation aid will signal the beginning of his descent into abject poverty and homelessness.

    But I doubt it. Wingnut welfare loves a racist, and adores murderers of innocent teenagers, so they have a twofer with this creep.

  • malsperanza

    Reached for comment, Zimmerman said he was disappointed, but was not going to dwell on the past. “Unlike some people, I’m moving on with my life.” The sometime neighborhood-watch expert showed reporters his prototype for a first-person-shooter game based on his experiences. “I harbor no ill will,” he remarked. “I’m going to send a free copy to Trayvon’s parents, you know, as a gesture.”

    • Kavefish

      I can picture the gesture they provide in return.

    • roberteye

      Yeah he’s moving on with his life, unlike Trayvon.

    • Sunnyinwyoming

      Are you being snarky or is that actually a real quote?

  • JustDon’tSayDittos
    • JustDon’tSayDittos

      Because someone remarked a little farther down how asinine painting “Black Ops” on the side of a jeep was, I thought of John and John.

      • Spurning Beer

        You’re going to make fun of my Witness Protection Program baseball cap, too?

  • Beaumarchais?

    On the bright side, perhaps this is a sign that the Zimster is flat broke and will soon be homeless.

    • alwayspunkindrublic

      I’m worried he might have to kill another kid to get the grifter bucks flowing again.

  • Angela Ruzzo

    If I had the money, I’d buy the damn thing, then hold a public event (media invited) and have it crushed to smithereens.

    • Leadfoot_LA

      Maybe we can start a go fund me. Unfortunately, the $$ would still go to Zimmerman.

      • Jukesgrrl

        Him actually having more $ than he makes selling paintings of confederate flags might be just the incentive Trayvon’s parents need to sue him in civil court, something they have not done at this point. I’ve heard several people suggest that Oprah should be encouraged to buy the gun and destroy it. She certainly could afford it.

        • cynmac

          I don’t think Trayvon’s parents want any more of the circus. I wouldn’t.

  • BadKitty904

    Presumably said link was wearing a hoodie?

  • guppy06

    Tangent: So. Much. Hatred for those LED light bars.

    At what point is it legal to throw roofing tacks out your car window? Or is it just one of those “No jury would convict” things?

    • Roadstergal

      Would juries convict for removal of the valve cores? Banana in the tailpipe?

      • guppy06

        A tailpipe full of valve cores?

        (Hey, I’m committed here…)

    • Mary Stone

      Sugar in the gas tank.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Chloroform works much better – hot hydrochloric acid on hot metal is a sweet combination.

    • I would certainly not laugh if someone committed the despicable act of vandalism where they poured a bag of near rotted onions down the exhuast stack of those patriotic “rolling coal” trucks those True Patriots™ fellas like so much.

      • HorseChestnut

        Rotten onions are the worst.

  • Mimihaha

    I hate to point this out, but if the media just ignored him, and not give him what he craves, maybe he’d go away.

    • HITO

      but then Z might be so inclined to kill again to garner that attention he thinks he deserves

    • DinkyBossetti

      I think it’s a worthy goal to expose the fact that he stands to profit off of killing a child. If no one knew, no one would have been able to stop the original auction from happening (and hopefully this one, and the next one, until he gives up).

  • Poor Georgie. The load in his britches is now thicker than his billfold. Moist too – if he lets his underwear dumps dry up, it’ll be the first time in forever there’s been anything hard below his waist.

    There’s always ED ads – guns are a soft-off/moldy-banana move, just a heepin’ pile of humiliation like wearing a Cialis T-shirt over your gimp suit.

    Hey, does Cialis need another ass for its bathtubs? If he’s up for an actual day of work, I got a plugged-in toaster at the ready. I got an extension cord cuz I seem to remember a lot of beaches and fields.

    • Speaking of “extensions”, the last clerk who asked Little Georgie if he needed an extended warranty was shot dead. Little George knows he’s way past his warranty period. #ammosexual #ammosexualproblems

  • Peripatetic Poltroon

    Can someone run the price up to eleventy billion?

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …can someone re-post the commenting rules, because I’m about to get banned!!!

    -This guy obviously is either chemically dependent or mentally unstable(DUH!!!!11!!!).

    -His face has officially eclipsed Ted Cruz and Trumpenstein as the most punchable faces in America.

    -As a responsible owner of a 2 year old BLACK son if this rancid bag of rat turds ever crossed my path $&&$ ^**^??#{#{% []]]][^^}€{€€|+=|€_>|£|¥+|

    -He is clearly on the “OJ Simpson” path and will end up imprisoned because he thinks he is “invincible”

    #FukkThatGuy!!!

    • Rasilom

      I must say, your skirted the rulz quite well. And for the record this pasty white boy agrees with your 100% Just fuck than guy. And may all the demons in hell fuck him too, repeatedly, without end 24/7 365 for eternity.

      • HorseChestnut

        I’m going to be that guy and ask that we please not wish rape on anyone, ever, for any reason. Not even George Zimmerman, not even in Hell. Nope.

        • Rasilom

          you are right and my appologize. I ment to add with votes.

          • AngryBlakGuy

            …well, considering that I don’t believe in imaginary sky Gods or Fire Gods, you get a pass from me! Just always remember the votes part my friend

      • ahughes798

        According to the Bibble, says my fundy neighbor(she’s really nice, actually)all demons and angels are male, period. So you’re right on target, Rasilom!

        • Frank Underboob

          Wait, so she’s saying that Succubi are no longer a thing?

          • ahughes798

            I’ll have to ask her about that. Were Succubi in the Bibble?

          • Frank Underboob

            Most of the demon stuff wasn’t in the Good Bock.

    • Redgyal

      He will never end up like OJ because there are people who want to protect him. Fact.

      • AngryBlakGuy

        …not so sure of that. This asshole has went out of his way to exploit this murder. Even right-wingers have tried their best to distance themselves from him. I think if he is ever arrested on a solid charge, his ass is toast.

    • Frank Underboob

      I’m white, but my teenage son is black & living in a racist town, & I can’t tell you how glad I am that handguns are illegal here.

      • AngryBlakGuy

        …I live in Florida and I can tell you that the Martin family acted in a better fashion then I could ever imagine. If I was in their position I may have ended up on national news for doing something stupid

        • Frank Underboob

          I don’t blame you. I f I lost my son that way, I honestly don’t know what I’d do.

  • Bill Slider

    There are auctioneers and there are lawyers. Then, there are other auctioneers and other lawyers..They both are similar to bankers. All three are very religious. They worship the God of Greed

    • Delu

      Fear Hate and Greed. The biggest motivators of all.

      And the greatest of these is greed.

    • alpacapunchbowl

      #notalllawyers

  • Mary Stone

    May George Zimmerman fail at everything he tries to do, including breathing. May he live to be 100 years old while failing at everything he tries to do, and may there be Legos under his bare feet for eternity.

    • gingerland62

      Spoken like a mother of a son.

    • TheBoatDude

      Well, he’s well on his way for that first one….this guy isn’t going to be really happy anytime this life…

    • phoenix00

      He did succeed at standing his ground…..

  • sosuume

    Jesus. Is there any limit to the depth of depravity for this guy?

    • Jesus: Nothing Dad or I could figure out. Even Satan is puzzled.

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Not at all.

    • HITO

      how desperate is he to now auction off his most prized treasure of murder ?

    • gingerland62

      No

  • Pinkham’s Law

    It’s baaaaaaaa-aaaaack. Now on another auction site. You may or may not get to the page. It appears that they were VERY unprepared for the traffic!

    • The Witch of Endor

      Yep, it looks like the site’s down.

      • dshwa

        I hope it’s down because of “WTF is wrong with you!?!!?!!?” posters letting them hear that they are terrible.

        • HorseChestnut

          I hope it’s down because anons decided to do something useful and DDOS’ed it into oblivion.

          • bupkus23

            Even better – they pretended to be buyers, and bid the price up to infinity and beyond!

      • Frank Underboob

        It’s up, but the current bid is in the tens of millions of dollars, mysteriously.

  • Zimmerman: “Well, what good is ‘black lives matter’ if those lives aren’t murdered by my Patriot Maker™️????? What good is A’murica if I can’t sell mass quantities of my personally signed, blood stained Patriot Makers™️?? for profit??? Black lives only matter if they’re *dead* black lives! USA! USA! USA!”

  • chimpevil

    The devil already this piece of shit’s soul, who cares whatever else this piece of does in life, the piece of shit. RIP Trayvon.

  • HITO

    “no comment on the actions of that person that murdered Trayvon”

  • Be Gin

    So Hollywood…whatta ya waiting for? This guy only has so much shelf life and then ****poof****.

    Now don’t cry wing nuts. I’m sure someone will make that GZ feature film you drool for some day. Something with GZ, Tonya Harding AND Chuck Norris. You can’t lose money with that cast!

  • CatCope

    Asshole, Prick!!!!!!!!!! MJ, G.Frey, Bowie, Prince GONE.. This Piece of Shit still walks free without ANY restrictions or repercussions? Lady Karma, Where are YOU??? You are the bitch who knows where this creep lives. Go GET ‘EM already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • gingerland62

    I see a vice presidential nomination in his future if he keeps this up.

  • Incoming Ham

    Mr. Zimmerman, here is your award for being dick of the century, 2000 way tie, but you are in there – fairly near the top, and for just being an all around shit person. It comes with a voodoo curse and a coupon for Donald Trump Steaks from Sharper Image.

  • dshwa

    Hopefully, despite the pledge to donate the money to fighting BLM, this is a further sign of his financial death spiral. That’s the only positive I got, and anything else I say would violate The Rules for Radicals and roughly 27 precepts of 11 different religions.

  • Mr Sincere

    This is a very sick individual.

    • OppressedMass

      As is whoever actually buys that gun.

  • Be Gin

    Now he picks a fight with Decency itself! I guess killing-people-one-at-a-time is just not good enough for G…now he has to kill Higher Orders of Human Aspiration too.

    If telling him to fuck off is the wrong response and people want to take the high road G will just keep finding ways to rub our faces in his depraved opinion of the human condition.

    Y’know what? I’ll have a drink, get some rest and start again tomorrow. I ain’t letting you nightmare nihilists kill my party. I’m going to get me some love. I’m going to do some good. I’m going to prove you wrong G. You don’t get to write this story.

    • Rasilom

      What I am wondering is this, could some minority person just outright shoot this piece od shit under stand your ground for the simple reason than they felt treatened by his generally presence and the fqct than he has killled before and is concealed carring? Really not wishing violence on him just wondering if he got his ass capped because he showed up somewhere and was recognised for whos he is. It would before irresponsible not to speculate…..

      • cynmac

        Not even his girlfriend could get away with that and she had an actual domestic violence call on him. i think we just need to wait for Karma to take effect.

        • Rasilom

          Go Karma Go!!!! She is vengful and has and infinite memory and will make you pay across multiple lives if She feels it is nessicary. This is why I really really try to treat and people well.

      • Frank Underboob

        I think it’d be poetic justice if a white ‘Christian’ guy shot him, preferably in a drunken argument in the parking lot of a bar.

      • Sakonyachen

        The word minority has the answer to your question right in the middle of it

  • Jayleia Green

    Nothing screams black ops like a big logo that says “BLACK OPS” on the side…

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Needs a Confederate flag.

      • jmk

        And a Gadsden one.

    • Thatsitfor Theotherwon

      I thought these guys hated the blacks?

  • Jonny On Maui

    I see the threads talking about ole Georgie Boy’s karma. It’s not only that our friend is building up a cosmic load of bad karma, it’s where he’s stockpiling it. One of the least things we can expect is window defying flying alligator payback, as this is standard in Florida. But at the rate Georgie Boy is shoveling it on, I can only assume our friends karmic demise will involve a charge by the hour room, a hooker, a python and the meth head hooker boyfriend that will end up doing the time. There will be video and it will be epic.

  • Sakonyachen

    And of course it has a phallus on the front. And of course it’s black. What the fuck is with racists and their fascination with the black phallus? Plenty white guys are well endowed. I’m not one of them, but that’s not the point.

    • Tio_Doidinho

      Takes a big man to admit that.

      • Sakonyachen

        A Huuuuuge man even.

  • Stein Olsen
  • bupkus23

    I see the original post has been updated, noting that Zimmerman found another website to fulfill his racist money-grubbing fantasies auction off that gun. What I didn’t see coming was this:

    “Bidding in an online auction for the pistol former neighborhood watch volunteer George Zimmerman used to kill Trayvon Martin appeared to have been hijacked by fake accounts posting astronomically high bids….”

    Link: http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/million-dollar-bids-shown-gun-killed-trayvon-martin-39085401

    How come Wonketeers didn’t think of this – or did they?

  • FZsdaughter

    It’s been relisted. According to Wonkette policy on comments (which are not allowed), I cannot say I hope whoever buys it uses it on him. But maybe I could say that I hope he is eating skittles in that neighbourhood one evening…

  • Thatsitfor Theotherwon

    I’d probably shoot kids too if I had a set of pig eyes like Mr Z…

  • bubbuhh

    I might be interested in purchasing this murder weapon. I would have to try it out first with Zimmerman present. In Florida.

    • SDGeoff

      I wouldn’t want to be near that little cretin. His MIA spokesmodel brother, on the other hand; well, I wouldn’t mind a private interview. (He always appeared rather half-hearted about speaking on that loon’s behalf. In my fantasy.)

    • Frank Underboob

      HE WAS COMING RIGHT AT ME! – YOU ALL SAW IT, RIGHT?

  • malsperanza

    Florida is one of those places where leprosy is still endemic.

    • Frank Underboob

      Apparently it’s somehow related to the armadillos. No, seriously, please stop laughing! http://naturalsociety.com/armadillos-spreading-leprosy-in-florida/

      • sillyclucker

        This is true , but scientists are pretty sure that people gave it to armadillos.

        • Frank Underboob

          If so, that’s an even more disgusting thing than the old monkey-sex-AIDS story.

          • sillyclucker

            Except the monkey one isn’t true of course. The opossum one very likely is.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    That 2014 Jeep is still on the block in 2016? If nobody’s hit the minimum bid yet, it’s not likely that anybody ever will.

  • jmhm
    • Tbone

      Clinton/bonerhitler 2016!

      • jmhm

        Bonerhitler amuses me, because apparently I am 12.

  • SDGeoff

    I wonder if one of Mr Trump’s little minions (you thought I was gonna say hands!) will snatch this item up and sell knock-offs on the Trump Steak Channel?

Previous articleWorst Restaurant Customers Ever Start Brawl Over Employee Smiling At Them
Next articleDonald Trump, Paul Ryan Is Not That Kind Of Girl!