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What in the Sam Hell?
What in the Sam Hell?

A Dairy Queen owner in Texas has come under public fire for posting really bigoted signs about someone else’s religion. OH BOY, it’s Texas, must mean another Christian shitting on Muslims, we’re so tired of — wait, the asshat DQ owner is a Muslim? What the hell?!

Mohammed Dar really, really doesn’t like Hindus and Hinduism. He has made this explicitly clear at his Houston-area Dairy Queen with signs both outside and inside the restaurant — signs whose bigotry is only exceeded by their batshit lunacy. Among other credos, the signs proclaim things like “‘Not’ Monkeyism of Dark Ages,” “Follow The Truth Of The Constitution, NOT Evil Pharoaha,” “Manifesto of Illegality,” and “Demonic Mithraism.”

We’re not sure what any single one of those damn lunatic phrases means, but we’re pretty sure each is fucked up in its own special way. We particularly like the “Evil Pharoaha” one, because we’ve never seen someone misspell “pharaoh” in two different directions at once. Also too, it makes perfect sense, because we recall the great Judeo-Christian story wherein Rameses II called upon Kali and Shiva to intervene when Moses rained down frogs on his ass.

Now, your first reaction to this story might be: who the hell hates Hindus?! Did Dar see “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” one too many times and start assuming it was a documentary? Does he have a very specific phobia of four-armed elephant Gods? Is he violently opposed to jarringly-misplaced song and dance numbers? Hatred for any religion is unacceptable and wrong (unless it’s Scientology), OBVIOUSLY, but seriously, what the hell?!

But as baffling as anti-Hindu sentiment might seem to Americans, Muslim-Hindu conflict is a lot more common around the world — especially in South Asia — than many Americans realize. India, Pakistan, and Sri Lanka have all been hotspots for some pretty ugly shit related to this.

Speaking of ugly shit, here’s Dar’s impassioned defense of his WTF bigotry:

“Racism is the foundation of Hinduism,” said Mohammad Dar, owner of the restaurant.

Dar … insists his messages are not opinion but fact. He said along with ice cream he wants to serve up some education to his customers and that’s all he’s trying to accomplish with his signs.

“This the facts, anybody has a problem, I challenge them to prove me wrong,” he said. “I do not practice racism but human equality.”

Yeah, Mohammed, we don’t think “these aren’t the droids you’re looking for” is going to work on this one. Call it a hunch.

Anyway, let’s talk about — oh, Mohammed has more bullshit to say, cool:

Dar told KPRC he serves 200 customers a day. These signs have been up for the last six months and he says only a few people have been offended.

About 1 percent, he estimates.

“This is not offensive, this is educational,” he said.

If nothing else, this guy is a fascinating window into what Donald Trump would be if he wasn’t a white New Yorker. But hey, you do you, Dar. Except, no, please stop doing you, you is one fucked up sumbitch.

Obviously, Dar has a legal right to hold and preach his horrible bullshit opinions-which-are-not-facts. That’s what free speech means. It also means we can call him a dicksocket and refuse to eat his dumb Hinduphobic blizzards.

We also can’t imagine Dairy Queen’s corporate HQ is particularly thrilled with being associated with bigotry now that this is out there, so have fun with that one, Mohammed!

[GrubStreet / Click2Houston]

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  • Spotts1701

    He better be careful, or his franchise rights will disappear faster than a Dilly Bar in the South Texas summer.

  • DerrickWildcat

    I don’t mean for this to sound racist but, Indians are really sneaky.

    • JohnBull

      Today we are all racist Indians.

  • Indiepalin

    Demonic Mithraism is just another name for the clap.

  • rachelmap

    What? Mithraism is still a thing?

  • memzilla

    [DQ owner] Mohammed Dar really, really doesn’t like Hindus and Hinduism.

    I hear he’s opening a new deli.

    • Shibusa

      Vishnu hadn’t gone there.

      • memzilla

        I wasn’t expecting a Patna back for my Pune effort.

      • coozledad

        Ellie will sue your ass for 150 millions.

      • HolidayinCambodia

        That wounds me to the crore.

        • Thepeoplevs.

          Stop being such a Brahma queen

      • HolidayinCambodia

        Genesh it’s not so bad.

      • mtn_philosoph

        I was afraid you might Goa there.

    • CapnFatback

      Yes, but do they sell New Dilly bars?

    • guppy06

      Waaaaaiiit… doesn’t DQ sell hot dogs?

      • Naytch

        He makes his from Sacred Cows.

        • guppy06

          So the Mulsin is selling Hebrew National?

          • Naytch

            No running pig dogs for him!

      • mtn_philosoph

        In some parts of town they are rumored to serve slumdogs.

    • FlownOver

      I’m not sure I Sri what you mean.

  • DerrickWildcat

    NO PUNS!

    • coozledad

      Ashoka’d use a sundae now.

      • SpideySenser

        With Ghandi sprinkles on top.

        • SnarkTank

          something something cut you with a Shiv-a something (with votes!)

    • SnarkTank

      Ooooo, a Pun-Jab!

      • mtn_philosoph

        Keep this up and I might be forced to tell my attack cobra to “Sikkim!”

  • Me not sure

    The odd thing to me is that most of the Dairy Queens around my neck of the woods seem to be franchised by Hindus.

    • onedollarjuana

      Populated by rednecks, I’ve found. Even in the tony wine-soaked area of Seattle Metro where I live. I don’t know where they come from, maybe spontaneous generation?

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        So, like they just spring into being owning franchises?

        • gedjcj

          I think they were referring to the rednecks populating the franchises. I suspect they’re included in the franchise package.

        • kev

          this is probably one of those deals where someone with $500,000 to invest can buy his way into the us amurica. once ISIS gets wise they’ll be snapping up the 7-11s everywhere rather than wait for the two-year refugee screening process to be completed. “good news osama — you-re check cleared — you’re in!”

  • Lizzietish81

    I can believe most of his customer base not being offended…because they don’t get it

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      Whatta they care if a brown wants to shart on other browns?

    • coozledad

      They probably think it’s an ad for phone cards.

      • SuspectedDemocrat

        “Pack of menthols and one Pharoaha scratcher, please.”

    • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

      It is Texas, they probably don’t even notice batshit signs, just part of the scenery.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    “Is he violently opposed to jarringly-misplaced song and dance numbers?”

    Coffee Spewed on the Keyboard Award of the morning

    • mtn_philosoph

      “Ma’am, if you find my bally would you toss it back into my yard?”

  • Jen_Baker_VA

    Also too, it makes perfect sense, because we recall the great Judeo-Christian story wherein Rameses II called upon Kali and Shiva to intervene when Moses rained down frogs on his ass.

    This was inspired.
    Also, both sides do it!!!!!!

    • AntiDerpomeme

      Oh damn, I was way late to that party. This is why one should read the comments before posting, if they were allowed.

  • Lizzietish81

    The weird part is that he references Pharaohs and Mithranism, which are Egyptian and Persian respectably.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      One thing bigots the world have in common, besides unreasonable hatred of different people just because, is their inability to grasp concepts like history, geography, humanity or cleanliness.

    • coozledad

      Pharoaha?

      Hahahaha.

    • FauxAntocles

      respectively…
      — Nitpick Police

    • Nounverb911

      I read Mithranism as Mittinsism. Why does he hate Mitt Romney?

      • CapnFatback

        Why shouldn’t he be like everyone else?

      • Latverian Diplomat

        If you endorse Ted Cruz, you have to expect some fall out.

        • yyyaz

          When you live in a state that elected Booger-Eatin’ Rapey-Face Shitstain Cruz, the fallout is far from over.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Hinduism, like many other polytheistic religions, has no trouble incorporating other religious figures into its pantheon.

      Mithras (or at least the name) is probably related to the Hindu god of the sunrise Mitra.

      For some Hindus, Buddha and/or Jesus were avatars of Vishnu.

      That said, this guy is clearing just posting half-understood, poorly translated hate speech.

      • SnarkTank

        I thought it had to do with that chain-mail vest that Bilbo gave to Frodo.

  • coozledad

    What an asshole. The divine truth of the constitutions is that Buddhists get up every damn day planning on how to ruin your dinner party. And don’t even get those fuckers started on the DQ.

  • Toomush_Infer

    Cthulu would have a word….

  • chimichanga

    Those Hindu goddesses tend to be all grabby and hog the fries.

  • beatbort

    Wait until you see the signs Apu put up in his Quickie Mart about Muslins!

    • Spotts1701

      “Please do not offer my god a peanut.”

      • H0mer0

        “I gave my [god] a chicken, which had no bones…mmm, chicken”

  • Thaumaturgist

    We have a First Amendment right to display cartoons depicting Mohammad. Who would engage in such repulsive conduct?

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      It is nice to see that Christianists do not have the sole ownership of being raging assholes.

      Ert, raging hypocritical assholes I meanted.

  • Lizzietish81
    • Jen_Baker_VA

      …..He is super pretty Justin T. scaled and I will now be you tubing all day long. THANKS, LIZZIE
      No really, Thanks!

    • guppy06

      Looks like a localization of Grease.

  • Shibusa

    Mohammed Dar shouldn’t type-caste Hindus.

    • The Wanderer

      That gag was untouchable.

  • Jack Parsons

    “Is he violently opposed to jarringly-misplaced song and dance numbers?”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnspfa8h5p0

    • MrBlobfish

      I don’t know which is more awesome, that video or this one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bTGjjeMQ_cM

    • The Wanderer

      I’ve never dropped acid before, but this will do.

    • H0mer0

      I am constantly reminded what I miss out on, being a Coconut Indian.

  • Bureaucrap

    I am still waiting for the ecumenical global mud wrestling championship to determine which religion is the one true religion. Looking at you, Pope Francis.

  • memzilla

    He’s probably still mad that Apu’s political connections got Quik-E-Mart a zoning variance.

  • Jen_Baker_VA

    On the one hand, you’d expect a Muslim living in Texas to understand what it feels like to be persecuted for your religious beliefs and called unAmerican and Unconstitutional.
    On the other hand, Texas.

  • DoILookAmused2u ?

    Actually, racism was inherent in the Hindu caste system which is called Varna, literally meaning “color” because your color had a lot to do with it.

    That being said, moderate modern Hindus have been moving their religion in a more tolerant direction.

    That guy is still a bigot though.

    • chicken thief

      I have a friend who is a ‘dot on the head’ Indian and is Hindu. In their ‘traditional customs’ they are quite racist (against even Indians who are darker than they) and misogynistic. It’s a bit of a culture shock for her when she goes back to India to visit family and friends.

      • marxalot

        Hinduism’s caste system has an actual class of “untouchables.” So… yeah. I believe the word is “problematic.”

      • SpideySenser

        Bindi-Libelz!!!11!

      • DoILookAmused2u ?

        Well, it’s legal for folks from different castes to marry now (if not totally accepted), and even “untouchables” can get a government job.

      • PubOption

        At the time I took Indian history (High School, England, about 1970) we were taught that the lighter-skinned Aryans (same Aryans as Hitler went on about) invaded from the general direction of Persia about 5000 years ago – or possibly 5000BC, I don’t quite remember – and pushed the darker-skinned Dravidians south to Tamil Nadu and Sri Lanka. The insurgency then taking place in Sri Lanka was seen as the most recent manifestation of this struggle. The British exploited the caste system during the Raj, further dumping on the darker, lower-caste Dravidians.
        I am told that the current UK history syllabus does not feature Aryan-Dravidian rivalry as much.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Probably viewed as an oversimplification these days. But there’s definitely a North/South division in India. One example of this is disagreement over a common “lingua franca” for India because there are so many regional languages spoken by tens of millions of people.

          North Indians prefer Hindustani. South Indians generally prefer English, as they dislike the attempt to push a Northern language on them, and prefer English (now that the Raj is over) as a neutral choice.

  • SessileRaptor

    Blathering about what he thinks the constitution is, being hateful toward religions not his own, claiming the first amendment protects him, who says that Muslims can’t assimilate into american culture?

  • Pinkham’s Law

    uh, wat? OK, time for some googling. BRB!

  • Nounverb911

    I haven’t been to a DQ since 1975, do they still only serve vanilla frozen ice stuff?

    • SDGeoff

      No. They have added many more, even worser items to their menu.

      • PubOption

        Some of them even sell burgers, so they are not likely to get strict Hindu customers.

  • SDGeoff

    His visual aids and his attitude indicate he’s been assimilated into the Chamber of Commerce in Tejas.

    • Skadi

      He should have known resistance would be futile.

  • natl_[redacted]_cmdr

    “A Dairy Queen owner in Texas…”

    Aaaand, I’m out. Beer run!

    • marxalot

      Bee double ee double arr you en!

      • yyyaz

        I got a ten and a fiver….

        • aureolaborealis

          Found a store with a sign, said their beer was coldest,
          so they sent in Brad, cause he looked the oldest …

      • theblackdog

        Oh I can’t stop thinkin what the hell were they drinkin when they made this county dry?

  • NorthernSaber

    “Demonic Mithraism”- wasn’t that on Hindu Rodeo’s first album? Man I miss hearing those guys on Cities97…

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …are we ready for another ABG life story? To bad I’m gonna tell it anyway!!!

    In high school I had a best friend who was from Dominican Republic. Anyone who would glance at him would have thought he was a African American(except he was fluent in Spanish). However anytime I would call him black he would protest that he wasn’t “black” instead he would say he was “Dominican”. I would always joke with him and his sister that if a “race war” ever broke out that I seriously would doubt that the KKK would take the time to splice the nuance of “black vs. Dominican”. Case in point, why are minority’s attacking minority’s in this country? If Trumpenstein is successful in establishing the 4th Reich they won’t care who is Muslim and who is Hindu, to them you are all the same.

    • Michael Smith

      Its like that part in Do the Right Thing when the korean store owners try to avoid having their store attacked by claiming, in broken English, to be black.

    • DemmeFatale

      Sikh LIBEL!!!!

    • kev

      that’s just sikh!

    • YourNameHere

      Are you really expecting years of racism, classism, homophobia and other bullshit to just stop because they also hate white people?

      • AngryBlakGuy

        …errrrrrr no?! At no point during my comment(or anyone who has commented) has anyone said they “hate white people”. Second my post was meant to illuminate the issue with minority’s infighting with themselves when their are groups out there that see you as 2 sides of the same coin. I was joking about actual “Mexicans” and “Sea Mexicans”(Cubans) the other day, not because I pulled it out of my ass but because I heard 2 “co-workers” say it and I had to put them in in check.

    • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

      I’m sorry to say that in the Dominican Republic “black” means Haitian. They are busily evicting “Haitians” who have live and worked in the republic for generations, some of whom don’t speak French.

      • AngryBlakGuy

        …the Domincan vs. Haitain issue is serious issue down here in Miami. And as a person who’s 2 best friends hail from either country I could give you a serious rant! What I can say is this, the younger generation in Miami/S.Florida hates what’s going on Hispaniola

      • WIDTAP

        Psst. Dominican. Haitians. You both live on the same fucking island. It’s not like New York or New Jersey…wait…let me get back to you.

    • malsperanza

      People retain their cozy hatreds from the Old Country. At the moment, India is being run by a very dangerous, extremist Hindu fundamentalist named Modi. He is attacking Muslims in north India and doing all he can to start a race war. Indian and Pakistani Muslims are understandably a bit depressed about it.

    • lurch394

      Yeah, I always wondered about the Italian Americans who went ballistic when black men wandered into “their” neighborhoods, such as Bensonhurst. I guess they didn’t remember how “white” Americans told Italian jokes.

  • coozledad

    Didn’t Devine eat dogshit? I ain’t eating nothing from this Dairy Queen.

  • guppy06

    The signs look much more professionally done than your average Texas bigot. I’m also impressed that he apparently got some good ol’ LaRouchie, anti-Brit sentiment in there.

    • SDGeoff

      Looks like megachurch delusional paranoid chart art to me.

  • Msmlg1979
  • LarryHoudini

    That’s some nice deflection there, but he could up his game. How about: “You think MUSLIMS is bad? The dang hindu pharaohaists don’t even eat cheeseburgers! Their neighborhoods is the ones we should be patrollin’.”

    • Latverian Diplomat

      I don’t think the JDL would be down with the “cheeseburger test”.

  • Michael Smith

    So, like, does this make him more American in the eyes of Texans? It is probably a good strategy.

    Though bigoted slogans are usually stupid enough when you write them in your own language, let alone trying to translate your irrational paranoia into a language in which you aren’t used to writing complete sentences.

  • jjdaddyo

    It’s true, crazy fundy Muslins hate Hindus more than Christians and maybe even Jews. Christians and Jews are at least part of the Abrahamic tradition, whereas they consider Hindus idol worshipping pagans, and Mohammed was not down with that.

    • SpideySenser

      Hence, Pakistan.

      • Hesavebread!

        And Bangladesh, because the two parts of Pakistan couldn’t get on.

        • SpideySenser

          True that! I forgot about them separating. Those sky fairies sure do have some awesome powers!

    • beatbort

      I’m getting the impression that Mohammed was not down with pretty much everything.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      In my experience, degree of hatred has more to do with who your neighbors are (or were in the old country) than the fine points of Theology. Often tied up with historical and ethnic tensions too.

      See Ireland for example.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    A great deal of the conflict involving Hindus in Sri Lanks is with the majority Buddhist population. Overlaid with ethnic tension and immigration issues.

    (The plan to build a wall in the Palik Strait has not succeeded, probably because India won’t pay for it?).

  • Antimassacree

    I hear in Egyptian “Pharoaha” means both hello and goodbye.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Meli kaliki maka!

    • Jonny On Maui

      They sure spell ‘aloha’ funny…

      • Antimassacree

        Even weirder in hieroglyphics.

        • WIDTAP

          Yes, but it is not as insulting when they give you the bird

  • SDGeoff

    Go to the website named on the little chart on the cash register. It’s a real piece of work.

  • Beowoof14

    Forget it Jake it’s Texas.

  • Barley_Brains

    There is a history of Hindu sectarian violence against Muslims in India.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Violence_against_Muslims_in_India

    • Aquaria

      And before that there were centuries of Muslim atrocities against Hindus.

      They’ve been at each other’s throats since the 8th century, at least.

      • Hesavebread!

        And there is anti-Hindu violence in Bangladesh, despite the help India gave them in 1971. No major wars since then just the continual, low grade stuff in Kashmir and elsewhere.

      • Barley_Brains

        Ah, the joy of religion.

  • marxalot

    Those stickers are right up there with that multi-headed porn/sodomy/rollerskates/muder/party dragon thing the deranged Catholic dude has.

    • SayItWithWookies

      Well the porn/sodomy/rollerskates part certainly sounds intriguing.

      • guppy06

        I already have balance issues with both rollerskates and jiggery-pokery. Why combine the two?!

      • The Wanderer

        Is that behind a paywall?

      • darnyoudarnyoutoheck

        Careful, that’s how penile fractures happen.?

        • SayItWithWookies

          I’ll wear a condom. Protection, right?

  • Michael Smith

    Maybe he’s trolling the Texans – trying to get them to think:

    “Wow, don’t you think this guy’s a little too obsessed with the dangers of a religion that barely has a presence here… Oh wait a second – That’s just like us!!”

    • chicken thief

      “trying to get them to think”

      Good luck with that, Dar.

    • LarkintheAM

      Assumes a latent self-awareneness not in evidence.

  • azeyote

    i’m surprised he got himself a franchise – here in Oregon it seems most all the small hotels, and quicki marts are owned by Hindus –

    • Anarchy Pony

      There’s a hindu family here in my small oregon town, and they own just about all the non franchise motels.

      • Querolous

        My knowledge of Hinduism is limited to the books and PBS TV show “The

        Jewel in the Crown” so I could be off base but perhaps it’s is a caste thing? That family might be hereditary innkeepers. There is also one Hindu/Samoan/Hawaiian Representative, Tulsi Gabbard.

  • Candy Apple

    I…what..? What does the ancient Egyptian religion have to do with Hinduism?

    • Anarchy Pony

      EVERYTHING, SHEEPLE!

  • MrBlobfish

    His web site is a hoot. Hallucinogenic and chock full o’ mispellings.

    • YoBunnyBunny

      Alrighty then…

    • Operation American Jesus®

      Holy sacred cow, this guy’s the Muslim David Icke.

  • Pinkham’s Law

    I think I now understand how Buddhists must feel when they try to figure out Israeli/Palestinian issues. I got nothing. 0.o

  • Nounverb911

    Didn’t the Pharoaha build Ben Carson’s grain storage units?

  • “4 armed elephant god? Phpppt. We all know that the world was created in six days by an all powerful invisible being who opted to talk to one guy in a desert 1400 years ago and hasn’t spoken to anyone since.”

    • Toomush_Infer

      Hey! God talks to me all the time – I just don’t listen….

      • yyyaz

        Why is it that the ones who listen always hear “stay home today and clean your guns, the time is nigh”?

        • Toomush_Infer

          See! That’s what I told Him, the last time I did listen….

  • Ergoetal

    Plugging for a Trump ambassadorship, when the time comes. Fair play to ye!

  • Proud Liberal

    Hate is so nouveau riche these days. Ugh….

    • chimichanga

      New and improved in the new Jumbo Economy size.

    • yyyaz

      Nouveau riche is so “not dying in the street” these days.

  • LarkintheAM

    Oh, we’ve got someone here who’s outdone this wanna by miles. Abe Ayad keeps having his gas station (warning – this really is highly offensive) painted over by the city, by offended people in the neighborhood, by the City Mission paying him off so that they can repaint it, only to have it pop back up overnight again like a poisonous mushroom. Only his targets are the usual Jewishes rather than the Hindus, so I guess Dar gets points for originality in his bigotry.

    • CripesAmighty

      Yeesh (but, credit where due: he sure got the Halliburton part right).

      • LarkintheAM

        Well to quote Rick Perry, even a stopped clock is right once day. But gigantic load of fermenting horse shit sort of outweighs his one reasonable opinion.

    • artem1s

      forgot about that guy. remember the asshat who owned the cold storage right by the interbelt with giant anti-Semetic murals? we used to call it Nazi Cold Storage. thank Yahweh they finally tore it down.

      • LarkintheAM

        They keep trying to give Ayad incentives to stop, but he lets them paint over the station and then has it painted with a different set of disgusting screeds. I’m glad the cold storage guy finally sold the building. No wonder John Demjanjuk felt right at home around here. :-P

    • Querolous

      Bigoted religionist sells beer. Go figure.

  • chimichanga

    In Tea/Fundy/GOP world, racism and bigotry are always the other guy’s fault.

  • Msmlg1979

    It’s that special time of year when all the churches put up signs dogging on the poor Easter Bunny ’round my parts. One near my office has “THE EASTER BUNNY DIDN’T RISE FROM THE DEAD”. It’s my fondest wish to get letters, and add “NOR DID JESUS, AND HE NEVER GAVE ME DELICIOUS CHOCOLATE EGGS HE LAID HIMSELF EITHER!”

    • CapnFatback

      “I know; it’s great!”

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THa3RLTT9PA

    • Villago Delenda Est

      You know, the funny thing is, the entire resurrection story dovetails quite nicely into all the other mythological traditions about this time of year in the Northern Hemisphere. But the Christianists never seem to grok that. For reasons, of course.

      • Anarchy Pony

        All that other stuff is totally lies though, not true like our beliefs!

        • chicken thief

          Buff Nordic Jesus, frankly, is just more believable.

      • marxalot

        Eostre says what?..

      • Msmlg1979

        While my Dad tearfully thanks Jeebus for dying for us during the Easter lunch blessing, I will do my usual meditation on my love for my family, and gratefulness for all we have.

      • Hesavebread!

        +1 Heinlein

      • therblig

        the fact that the date changes from year to year based on astronomical phenomena should be a tip off. plus, blue peeps.

    • Skadi
    • The Wanderer

      I think I’ll go the Fertility Rite path this Eostre.

      • Msmlg1979

        That’s my idea of a celebration, sans reproduction!

  • beatbort

    Would you like sprinkles on that Hate Blizzard?

    • chicken thief

      “Yes, please, BUT NO DARKY COLORED ONES!”

  • Starfish

    Schwartze…they’re darker than we are…let em go.

    • The Wanderer

      Los ihn gehen! Cop a walk, s’awright.

  • Anarchy Pony

    The deleted comments on this one are gonna be entertaining.

  • AntiDerpomeme

    BOTH SIDES DO IT!!!11!!

    Wow, just wow. I assume this guy does realize that he’s very likely to be subject to the same bigoted BS from the less tolerant “Christians” that are his good ol’ boy neighbors, yes?

    • DoILookAmused2u ?

      I see you do not understand how this malfunction works.

      • AntiDerpomeme

        Intolerance I get, we are “lucky” to see many examples here on this mommy blog on the daily. But frankly I’m surprised that a guy that has likely been the subject of this kind of hate himself hasn’t developed a bit of sensitivity to being on the other side. But yeah, I know, I expect too much of many of my fellow Earthicans.

        • DoILookAmused2u ?

          I have never noticed a positive correlation between being the target of discrimination and hatred based on overly broad and ignorant assumptions and not targeting others with discrimination and hatred based on similar broad and ignorant assumptions.

          In the end, you have to take people on a case-by-case basis, and all of them have their biases, and some are just way more empathetic than others, but thankfully… so long as there is a thin veneer of civilization, and the society itself does not enshrine bigotry into policy, most folks do ok. They’re by no means perfect (and neither am I), but most of them mean well, and unless intolerant fucks take over, they will continue to moderate I expect.

          • BeliTsari

            The most horrible, wild-eyed bigot I personally know in Texas, is a Palestinian Papist Honda thief, skedaddled there… from Queens?

    • BeliTsari

      Nah, jus as long as he’s sqillin’ psychotic, hate-filled bigotry lahyk uh PEEG… he’ll probably get elected to city council, state legislature or Pharaoh of all he surveys?

  • StephC

    I just want to voice my support for writing the line : But hey, you do you, Dar. Except, no, please stop doing you, you is one fucked up sumbitch.

    That’s some Pulitzer-level shit there.

  • Jack_Carter_USA

    I suspect Faux News will denounce him for discriminating while Muslim.

    • xhris

      “It’s totally okay that we’re racist, because ‘they’ do it too!!”

  • Fartknocker

    Kemah, Texas. Nice town and home of one Randy Weber, who has been a regular here at Wonkette with pearls of wisdom like:
    http://wonkette.com/572174/congressidiot-learns-some-people-really-touchy-about-hitler-for-some-reason
    This is why I visit Kemah but will never live there.

  • CapnFatback

    “I’d like to get a blizzard mixed with cookie dough, choco chinks, and religious intolerance, please.”

  • Hinduphobic Blizzards is totally the name of my new rock band.

  • limberrat

    I grew up in the Bay Area which has a heavy Indian, Pakistani & Afghan population. Trust me when I say ALL the religions and cultures HAAAAATE each other. We actually had a fight at the wealthy high school in town where a group of Sikhs got into a fight with a group of Hindus and used friggin golf clubs as weapons.

    • Hesavebread!

      Well the Sikhs killed Gandhi, so the Indians stormed the Golden Temple. You know how it goes.

      • Be Gin

        Yep.

        Badly.

        As always

    • chicken thief

      You know it’s an expensive school when they can’t get to their tire irons for all the golf clubs packed in the trunk.

    • Skadi

      I went to a high school in a small, whitebread community, and I remember when our social studies teacher was trying to explain the long history of fighting between Catholics and Protestants. Some kid in the class called out, “It’s because fucking Catholics got a ‘tude, man.” And instantly everybody gave each other the side-eye and you could see who was Catholic and who was Protestant. Not making this shit up.

      The moment passed, of course, and we all laughed it off. Nervously.

    • The Wanderer

      I think that the Founders realized there was never going to be harmony between the various religions. That’s why they put the Establishment Clause into the First Amendment. The best you can hope for with the rival faiths is a Mexican Standoff, as it were.

  • marxalot

    Equality of opportunity! For bigotry. Everything’s bigger in Texas, y’all.

  • Enfant Terrible

    When did Ganesha poop on his prayer rug?

    • Dr. Krieger IRL

      That was me, sorry.

  • tehbaddr

    Dicksocket, nice one Pinkham! I’ll have to deploy that sometime when referring to my SO.

  • chicken thief

    Rafael is gonna have to suspend his Cruzmentum campaign and go straighten that sumbitch out.

    • Toomush_Infer

      He’s obviously just a terrist…

  • Oh, since it’s Texas, you know this is going to end well…

  • say wha

    I’ve seen something very similar in Texas before…

    • BurgersAndFlies

      Praise Bob!

      • artem1s

        slacktivists unite!

        • tomamitai

          Sounds too tiring, I think I’ll just lie here.

    • Skadi

      …so the “Texas effect” works on people regardless of religion?

    • The Wanderer

      Praise Bob!

    • artem1s

      nah man don’t be beating on Bob Dobbs, Bob Dobbs is totally cool.

  • Tovarish Z

    Usually franchisees have strict requirements in their contracts about the appearance on their restaurants….me thinks he may not be a Dairy Queen owner for much longer.

    • Belasaurius

      Denny’s might take him

      • BigBoppa

        There’s always Chik-fil-A.

        • theblackdog

          Or Cracker Barrel

    • therblig

      Dar-Dar is to be…pyunished

      • kaw143

        Weesa no lika da Hindu. Dey tinka dey so smarty. Dey tinka dey brain’s so beeg.

  • SayItWithWookies

    I’d never argue with a dude like that — looking at that sticker, you just know it promises that if you open your mouth you’ll have listen to hours of tedious insanity.

    • xhris

      And don’t even get him started on the moon landing coverup, or how the vaccinations are an evil government hollow-earth Illuminati lizardman plot to inject us all with tracking chips, and how all the autism caused by said vaccines is just a side effect of the targeted mind-control beams.

      • Mimihaha

        Don’t forget about fluoride in the water!

  • Scooby

    I am going to open up a Dairy Pharoh next to this guy.

    • chicken thief

      You could store grain there during the winter, non-ice cream eatin’, months!

      • cynmac

        Winter LIBELZ! Every month is ice cream time!

    • AntiDerpomeme

      You need to decide if you will offer ice cream cones to-go. It’s a deal breaker for some folks.

      • Scooby

        My new logo!

      • zerosumgame0005

        or ancient Egyptian laptops from aliens!

    • UnsaltedSinner

      Aha!

  • chicken thief

    This will have mah main man Louie Gohmert pulling his hair out trying to figger wtf is going on.

    • Dr. Krieger IRL

      He has hair!?!

      • SDGeoff

        His nether-parts hair.

        • Dr. Krieger IRL

          Ouch!

  • thewitchqueen74

    I went to the website listed on the poster above and I just…I have no fucking clue what I just saw…

    • Skadi

      I’m betting it probably doesn’t involve balloons, though.

      • zerosumgame0005

        well, he just needs to learn to inflate them after insertion, not before…

    • Douglas E. Berry

      That’s some prime lunacy. I give a 0.7 TimeCube rating.

    • Hardly Ideal
    • tomamitai

      Me, too, also! But, then, I feel the same way when I read about quantum mechanics, so…?

  • Jennifer R

    I’m getting really fucking tired of everyone fighting over which imaginary sky daddy has the biggest penis.

    • tomamitai

      Yes, when clearly they should be arguing over whose imaginary sky mommy has the biggest breasts!

      • Whoever it is, Trump has already tapped her for wive #6.

  • Dr. Krieger IRL

    “Hatred for any religion is unacceptable and wrong (unless it’s Scientology), OBVIOUSLY…”

    You, sir, are a suppressive.
    I shall make Xenus at you, watch me go!

    • DoILookAmused2u ?

      He is possessed by Thetans.

      • Dr. Krieger IRL

        He needs an Audit!

        • DoILookAmused2u ?

          Many of them to go clear.

          • Dr. Krieger IRL

            Proceeding on up that bridge with our Bond-Villain-In-Chief David Miscavige.

          • theblackdog

            Has anyone seen his wife lately?

          • Dr. Krieger IRL

            Oh, yeah. She’s around… Somewhere.

          • zerosumgame0005

            depends on their bank account balances!

        • zerosumgame0005

          Free Agent his butt!

          • tomamitai

            Butt play isn’t my Forté.

    • XENU LIBELZ!

      • Be Gin

        Fuck XENU!

        Cthulhu will devour all false idols.

        • tomamitai

          XUL will devour all false browsers.

          • jmk

            THERE IS NO DANA ONLY ZUUL.

    • sw19womble

      SQUIRREL!

    • tomamitai

      I read Xenus today, oh boy…

      • leemoder

        That hurt.

  • proudgrampa

    Is DQ halal?

    • DoILookAmused2u ?

      Yea, no.

    • NoGoodnik

      There isn’t enough real food in it to violate any halal rules.

  • Oblios_Cap

    Hatred for any religion is unacceptable and wrong (unless it’s Scientology),
    Actually, my list includes Mormonism, too.

    • DoILookAmused2u ?

      I hate when any religion or ideology enters a debate on Science.

  • Blank Ron

    Watch out, Gene Ray, Mohammed Dar is coming for you!

  • SDGeoff

    I got it. He’s been watching Glen Beck.

  • UnsaltedSinner

    I would have thought a Muslim would know the ancient Egyptians weren’t Hindus. But then I would have thought that someone who would put that much work into a poster would look up the correct spelling of pharaoh, as well.

    • tomamitai

      And Pythagorean, also too.

      • Brianna Amoré

        I love just how much time and energy went into such poppycock.

  • RoyalUglyDude

    Everybody needs somebody to hate, right?

    • witsended

      Radiohead before they was.
      Prize please.

  • Mavenmaven

    Dairy Queen of Persia

  • Nockular cavity

    MAKE EGYPT GREAT AGAIN

  • el_donaldo

    Someone should check the back of the DQ for freon leaks.

    • Be Gin

      Check the whipped cream dispensers too.

      • Usedtobeyellerdawg

        Way back in high school, someone told me you could get high off of snorting whipped cream. I never got it. I must have gone through 10 tubs of Cool Whip and never got a buzz.

  • Iam Reading

    Pretty sure this dude used to post really crazy shit on nbcnews.Com . The phrasing is too similar to be accidental

  • therblig

    he sounds like a 200-threat count muslin

  • Hardly Ideal

    “This the facts, anybody has a problem, I challenge them to prove me wrong,” he said.

    Does the phrase “burden of proof” mean anything to you, guy? Your pals in the Apollo Hoax crowd seem to have that problem, too.

  • Usedtobeyellerdawg

    ‘Pharoaha’ is just like ‘Maharaja-aha’, only different.

    • cynmac

      It wouldn’t be “wingnut” without the misspellings. That’s what makes it genuine!

  • dshwa

    And the right wingers say Muslims can’t assimilate into American culture.

    • mardam422

      Ding, ding, ding!!!

      • Barbaraasinegal3

        “my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….

        two days ago new Mc.Laren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month ..3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Here!oi1833➤➤➤➤➤ http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsMedia/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:❖:❦:::::!oi1833….

    • leemoder

      Winner, winner. Chicken dinner.

  • beavertank

    Only 1% of customers have been offended, and I would imagine he explains that by saying only 1% of his customers have been filthy racist Hindu scum so he doesn’t care what they think anyway.

  • Be Gin

    I go to DQ for…come to think of it, I haven’t gone to a DQ in over 30 years.

    But when I did go it wasn’t for a lecture on esoteric hate cults.

    • Brianna Amoré

      That reminds me, I haven’t had one of their chocolate-dipped soft serve ice cream cones in decades. In fact, I don’t even know where to find one nowadays.

  • SK

    The only things that we should be concerned about this DQ organization are:

    1. Is it halaal milkshakes that he sells?
    2. Does he firmly hold a firmly held religious belief?
    3. What would Ben Carson do if he were dining there, and a patriot decided to hold up the place?

  • TheBidenator

    I love this guy, “Racism is the foundation of Hinduism,” said Mohammad Dar, owner of the restaurant.”

    Followed up with: “I do not practice racism but human equality.”

    Now it’s been a little while since I’ve had to strictly observe logical form in argument construction but it seems that if you completely contradict yourself in warranting your claim you lose all the points….nerds?

  • Too bad DQ lost its right to use Dennis the Menace characters decades ago or else we could have had a picture of Ruff taking a piss on a statue of Vishnu while Margaret explains to Dennis why Hinduism caused both World Wars.

    • Teecha

      I have just googled Dennis the Menace and Ruff because I’ve never heard of Ruff. Dennis the Menace’s dog is called Gnasher and I had a googly eye Gnasher badge when I was in the Dennis the Menace fan club.

      So I thought it was an americanised version of Beano stalwart, but no! American Dennis is blond! And he doesn’t wear a stripy jumper!

      My whole world has been turned upside down.

      • Oooh yeah, I always forget that there’s TWO Dennis the Menaces. And the UK one probably could kick the US one’s ass.

        • bobbert

          Are there two Mr. Wilsons?

          • Querolous

            One of them is behind that eye-height fence

        • Lamashtar

          What? Thats bizarre. Like unto the Russians claiming their version of Winnie the Pooh is better.

  • Bitter Scribe

    So of course this guy doesn’t mind when people make obnoxious assumptions about Muslims, right?

    • WhyFelicia

      It’s just education!

  • Lady Bug

    Well that ain’t halal.

  • bargal20

    Truth be told, the follower of the stupid religion known as Islam isn’t entirely wrong about the stupid religion known as Hinduism. It is a pretty bugfuck racist religion. The caste system didn’t come from nothing.

    • Steven Posey

      All religions are dumb and varying degrees of “bugfuck racist”. Just different names for the same archetypes, and slight twists on goofy ceremonies that all shake out to the same thing. There has to be a better reason to hate and kill each other than “their imaginary friend is dumb”.

  • whitroth

    What, he’s worried about the legions of Mithraists? Sorry, that should be Legions, since the last large group of Mithraists I know of were in the Roman Legions, a couple years ago (as in, a couple thousand years ago)….

    mark “laugh while you can, Monkeyboy!”

  • Jonny On Maui

    “we recall the great Judeo-Christian story wherein Rameses II called upon Kali and Shiva to intervene when Moses rained down frogs on his ass.”

    I just assumed a typo and new writer…

    • Suttree

      Exactly! Kaili rained down hell fire…….

  • Relativicus

    All this guy is is cover for Christians who want to do the same thing. He even uses the same arguments.

  • Brianna Amoré

    You know who hates Hindus? Muslims. A lot. Like, really bad. So bad that in 1948 all the Muslims left India and formed their own country called Pakistan. And a bunch of Hindus died, as well as a bunch of Muslims. Over a million in fact.

    So you know who really hates Hindus? Muslims. A lot.

    • You know who hates Muslims? Hindus. A lot. That’s why they elected the quasi-fascist BJP to power, and why old people are being beaten to death in Indian villages for being suspected of eating beef.

      Just in case you were trying to make out that it was ALL the Muslims’ fault, that the Pakistan movement was motivated by bigotry and not, for example, terror at being a minority in a country run by Hindus.

      • Brianna Amoré

        They’ve been at each other’s throats for centuries. Ironically the only thing that kept them from killing each other were the British.

        • WhyFelicia

          Yes! Thank goodness those white people were there to make things peaceful and awesome. If only they would come back, surely everyone would be happy again!

          • Brianna Amoré

            Thanks for putting words in my mouth. That’s not what I said at all. Go be outraged somewhere else.

          • WhyFelicia

            Oh, no, sweetie. I have been here much, much monger than you have, and this is where I like to be outraged. Please show yourself out, and don’t let the door hit ya where the Good lord split ya.

          • Note that these Islamophobes/racists don’t suggest that Sikhs (who killed Indira Gandhi) are bad people, or that the generally Christian or Hindu Tamils (who killed Rajiv Gandhi) are bad people. No, it all boils down to the racist myth that The Moozlims are always killing their guiltless neigbhours unless stopped by white people with guns.

          • WhyFelicia

            Don’t I know it!

          • TheBidenator

            I’m sorry to wade in here but India and Pakistan sure have spent a lot of their time fighting over Kashmir for you to dismiss a discussion as being ethnocentric and because of colonialism…..can you please explain how this isn’t indicative of a pair of states and cultures who don’t like each other? http://www.insightonconflict.org/2015/09/violence-escalates-india-pakistan-border/
            If you want to make that an ethnic issue go right ahead but it really seems to me that much like Greeks and Turks there is not much love lost between Pakistan and India.

          • The states of India and Pakistan don’t like each other and haven’t since Partition. But to expand that to “Muslims and Hindus don’t like each other” is stupid and racist. First off, they are NOT unified cultures. Both India and Pakistan are a mosaic of different cultures, languages, AND religions. If it was all down to religion, then Bangladesh would not have seceded from Pakistan in 1971. I pointed out above that there have been Muslim presidents of India.

            Instead, scumbags on both sides of the border have used religion to divide people and gin up support for dictatorships. Pakistan had Zia-ul-Haq’s regime in the 1970s; India’s current BJP (Hindu near-fascist) government is the equal and opposite example. This is NOT essential to either religion. And certainly not all blame going on the Muslim side.

            The “religious war” framing is a lazy, Western racist idea that ignorant browns can’t help fighting over their sky daddies. It absolves the British from deliberately exacerbating these differences in the 1930s to try to stop the Indian independence movement. Just like they ginned up Catholics against Protestants in Ireland and Jews against Arabs in Palestine. The India/Pakistan conflict is between two groups of right-wing politicians on each side of the Partition line trying to gin up fear and hatred. Saying “Muslims hate Hindus” makes as much sense as saying “Americans hate Muslims”. Some do, because their piece-of-shit political leaders encourage them to do so; but that won’t do as an explanation for WHY.

          • Trying to use “culture” as an excuse, on the other hand, is just ignorant. Punjab and Bengal were historical provinces of India which were split down the middle by Partition in 1947; but Muslim Pakistani Punjabis have more in common with their Hindu and Sikh fellow Punjabis across the border than they do with, say, other Pakistanis from Sindh or Peshawar. Similarly, West Bengal and Bangladesh are very, very similar apart from the religion issue – much more similar than with the rest of the subcontinent.

          • Brianna Amoré

            You know what? I would respect your knowledge of the situation and be willing to listen to your point of view, were you not such a GIANT FLAMING ASSHOLE about it. But instead you throw around the “Donald Trump rally over there” bullshit at me, which is beyond the pale in my book. So bless your cold, black heart.

          • Brianna Amoré

            You’re right. I should have known better than to wade into a fight that’s been going on for millennia. My bad, I’ll do better next time. (Hangs head in shame).

          • Another racist trope: “THOSE PEOPLE have been fighting for ever because of their barbaric religion.” The Donald Trump rally is on another website.

          • Brianna Amoré

            Oh fuck off.

          • careful_driver

            I think you hurt her feelings…

          • Good!

          • careful_driver

            Oh, I didn’t mean to suggest that’s a bad thing!

          • WhyFelicia

            Later.

          • But she’s right. You did say something racist. During the Muslim-run Mughal Empire which preceded the British, Hindus and Muslims usually got on (except under some of the more bigoted emperors, eg Aurangzeb). But the British instituted a religious “divide and rule” policy, playing Hindus, Muslims and Sikhs off against each other. The creation of Pakistan was a tragedy but it was the logical consequences of the British Empire destroying intercommunity trust.

          • Brianna Amoré

            Well if I said something racist, that was not my intention and I apologize for it. However history indicates that there has never been peace between Muslims and Hindus in India:

            “Historical records of religious violence are extensive for medieval India, in the form of corpus written by numerous Muslim historians. Will Durant states that Hindus were historically persecuted during Islamic rule of the Indian subcontinent.[19] The total number of deaths of this period, are usually attributed to the figure by Prof. K.S. Lal, who estimated that between the years 1000 AD and 1500 AD the population of Hindus decreased by 80 million.[20][21][22]

            Religious violence in medieval India began in centuries before the start of Delhi Sultanate, with the raids by Turko-Mongol, Persian and Afghan armies. It intensified during Delhi Sultanate, continued through Mughal Empire, and then in the British colonial period.[23][24]

            “ During the British period, religious affiliations became an issue. Religious communities tended to become political constituencies. This was particularly true of the Muslim League created in 1905, which catered exclusively for the interests of the Muslims. Purely Hindu organizations also appeared such as the Hindu Sabha (later Mahasabha) founded in 1915. In the meantime Hindu-Muslim riots became more frequent; but they were not a novelty, they are attested since the Delhi Sultanate and were already a regular feature of the Mughal Empire. When in 1947, Muhammad Ali Jinnah became the first Governor General of Pakistan and the new border was demarcated, gigantic riots broke out between Hindus and Muslims.

            – Marc Gaborieau, Anthropology Today[23] ”

            Religious violence was also witnessed during the Portuguese rule of Goa that began in 1560.[25]”

          • You don’t say where you’re getting these quotations from, but they’re one-eyed, bigoted bullshit. You don’t mention, for example, the exemplary religious tolerance shown by the Mughal Emperor Akbar. It seems you’ve decided that Muslims are a problem, that they hate and kill their neighbours because Evil Quran or something, and you only want to hear evidence that confirms that.

          • Thanks for that.

          • Hesavebread!

            She’s right, we largely stopped them killing each other but doesn’t mention we killed plenty of Indians and let millions starve. So we were quite good in one way but really, really bad in all other ways.

          • Calli Arcale

            “Thank goodness those white people were there to make things peaceful and awesome.”

            I think it was more a case of having a common enemy for a while.

    • WhyFelicia

      All the Muslims left India? How come there are 138 million of them living there right now?

  • the-fancy-beast

    This is like the Dark Side of Dr. Bronner.

  • richardgrabman

    Down my way people have signs saying they’re Catholics, so don’t want to be bothered by Mormons or Jehovah’s Witnesses. After a visit one afternoon by Mormons, Jehovah’s Witnesses… and the Baptists… and the Legionaries of Christ (Catholic Fascists), I put up my own sign, saying we were Aztecs and ate missionaries.

    • SessileRaptor

      The rare door-to-door religion salesmen we get always take “No” as an answer on the first try, a fact that I attribute to the high concentration of Jews (orthodox and otherwise) in my suburb. They know there’s no point in pushing.

    • whitroth

      Ah, takes me back to the old days on usenet, where we’d talk about dealing with doorbell ringers (and they’re appropriately called God-botherers in the UK).

      I haven’t had any good ones to deal with in forever (due to where I’ve been living). But my late wife and I had a pair backpeddaling once: we waited for them to babble to “Kingdom of God” ™, and you stop them. “Waitaminute, that doesn’t sound very American! Don’t you believe in democracy and the Constitution? Do you want to overthrow our free government, and replace it with a religious dictatorship, like I-ran?”

      *snicker*

      mark

  • paul helssom

    “Is he violently opposed to jarringly-misplaced song and dance numbers?”

    Oh, dear. Is that all it takes?

  • WhyFelicia

    Eh, fundie Hindus are as terrible and fucked up as any other fundie. But I have to admit that this imagery and signage is a new level of woah.

    • SessileRaptor

      My low point for “every religion has horrible, horrible jackholes” was when I heard about Buddhists at an orphanage preventing a visitor from giving the children candy on the grounds that the children had been born orphans and so were making up for bad acts in a past life and therefore didn’t deserve candy.

      • WIDTAP

        “…and so were making up for bad acts in a past life and therefore didn’t deserve candy.”

        Carmel is a bitch.

      • WhyFelicia

        Buddhists can be horrid dicks about a lot of stuff. But that’s a new level of OMGWTF.

  • WhyFelicia

    I think Dairy Queen seeks out the nutty Muslims. My hometown had exactly two Muslims in it, and they also ran the local Dairy Queen and were INSANE. A man tried to rob the store once, with a gun, and the owner jumped over the counter and chased him outside, where he beat him with a broom until the police arrived. I mean, mad props to him for facing down an armed robber, but he was still incredibly awful to unarmed customers as well.

  • Playonwords

    Mithraism??? WTF? Has this guy got Roman Legionaries in his town?

    Actually I suspect he is anti-Parsee (Zoroastrian) who worship Ahura Mazda. The Parsee fled to India after being oppressed by the Caliphs.

    • Zap Rowsdower

      I drive a Mazda. Nice car.

      • Rick Kitchen

        Is its name Ahura?

      • Querolous

        I remember when they first started selling their Wankel engine car. I had a confuse then decided that Maxfield Parish and Edison light bulbs were never popular in Japan

    • Lamashtar

      I didn’t think they still existed.

  • Lordpnut

    This depth of WTF takes time to process. I may not make it out the other side. If no one has heard from me in three days, send over a search party. Emphasis on PARTAY!

  • Michael Abracham

    Muslin?????

    • RoniOh

      You must be new here. It’s a joke, a parody of the illiterate types who display their bigotry with misspell . . . . oh fuck it, never mind.
      Yeah, you got us all you Typo King you. It’s really an article about cheesecloth.

      • Moonshadow Kati

        A quick peek at his Discus shows that yes, this is his first time ever commenting here, probably because comments are not allowed.

  • malsperanza

    The monkey thing is a reference to Hanuman. The mithraism thing is some kind of sideswipe at the Zoroastrians, a.k.a. the Bahai–those nice folks who got massacred a couple years ago because someone thought they were Muslims.

    But here’s the real question : is this one of those Dairy Queens that serves those deep-fried mushrooms? Because otherwise, fuck that guy.

    • SessileRaptor

      I remain eternally sad that my local DQs don’t have fried mushrooms because they’re my favorite junk food treat. There’s one pizza place locally that has them and that’s it.

    • Rick Kitchen

      Zoroastrianism/Parseeism and Bahai are two entirely different things.

      • cessnadriver

        Who cares! The only true god is the FSM!

        • Rick Kitchen

          Wait, let me get my colander …

          • Hesavebread!

            We are touched by Her noodley apendages!

          • cessnadriver

            Ramen!

      • malsperanza

        I thought the roots of Baha’i were Zoroastrian, no?

        • Rick Kitchen

          No, the roots are Islam. That’s why Islam hates it so much. Bahais think they are an advanced form of Islam.

          • Nico

            Actually we are a independent religion, not an “advanced” form of any other religion.

          • lurch394

            Baha’i, if I understand it correctly, is to Islam what Unitarianism or Unity is to Christianity. Yes, I can see how they’d hate that.

    • two months later, but I believe you’re talking about the massacre at the Wisconsin Sikh temple in 2012. Sikhs are not Zoroastrians either, fwiw. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wisconsin_Sikh_temple_shooting

      • malsperanza

        Yes, I think I managed to get everything wrong in that post. But my heart was in the right place.

  • Swampgas_Man

    Pharoaha — When Ramses listened to “Take On Me” and “The Sun Always Shines On TV”.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Nice try, Mohammed. But no matter how stupid and ignorant and hateful you try to be, you’re never going to be regarded as a real Texan.

  • handyhippie65

    hinduisim has been around longer that either islam, or christianity. buddha was a hindu. so who’s right? the old, or the new?

    • Mickey Donovan

      NOT,K

  • Steven Posey

    Someone should dress up in mummy bandages and a pharaoh hat and toss plastic scarabs at this guy. “YOU HAVE INVOKED THE CURSE OF THE PHARAOHS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO”

  • DavidW

    No one has a monopoly on the truth…

  • goddessoftransitory

    Well, my List Of Places I’m Super Glad Not To Work At just got longer by one.

  • “This is not offensive, this is educational,” he said.

    Which is exactly what I’m sure this guy would say if a fellow good ‘ol boy Texan pointed at him and yelled “terrorist!”

    Just educating you is all.

  • lurch394

    That does it: from now on I’m only eating at Dairy Queens owned by Sikhs. I’m stealing “dicksocket,” too.

  • kareemachan

    When a person gets a franchise, don’t they have to sign a contract with, well, I don’t want to say a morals clause, but something where they can’t besmirch the DQ name?

  • Abyss

    Mithraism…. Isn’t that that stuff the Elves made Bilbo’s shirt out of…?

  • splashy79

    So, religious freedom can go all kinds of ways, can’t it.

  • Jay

    I just want to point out that “muslin” (in the headline) is a fabric, not a religion. I assume this was a typo and not intentional, but this is the second time in a week that I’ve seen this typo and I don’t want it to become a thing.

    • Lala

      It’s not a typo, and it’s definitely intentional. It’s written that way to poke fun at the way that stereotypical racists make bigoted comments about “Muslins.” The idea that those making the comments are so stupid that they are unable to spell correctly. ;)

  • Every time the Muslim is the victim of hate in a story like this, the comments fill up with bigots saying “well it’s true, they and their religion are eeeevil.”

    To be fair, maybe we should do the same and say Hinduism does have some wacky beliefs about racism and caste.

    • Dapper Dan

      Then by that logic, Muslims are terrorists and believe in slavery and pedophilia.

  • nickRay

    Don’t you just hate it when Muslim DQ owners act like Republican presidential candidates….

  • SuperNeo™

    6 months 65 yr old idiot abusing relie gion . that too when he himself belongs to religion believe in killing in peoples.
    shame on Texas government for allowing this kind of nonsense, is Texas going in Pakistan way. where govt officially allows radicalization.

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