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Muslim sharks will behead you!
A typical Syrian refugee probably.

Oh fiddlesticks, the Sharia law is coming to Indiana, probably. A cruel federal judge named Tanya Walton Pratt has ruled that she doesn’t even CARE that horrifically stupid Republican Gov. Mike Pence does, like, three oopsie squirts in his pants every time he thinks about scary Syrian refugee children, and even worse than that, he’s not allowed to stop them from being resettled right there in his state, among children of the corn who elected him. Everybody take cover!

A federal judge on Monday ruled that Indiana Gov. Mike Pence overstepped his authority when he ordered state agencies not to pay refugee resettlement agencies with federal grant funds for their work helping to resettle Syrian refugees. […]

“The State’s conduct clearly discriminates against Syrian refugees based on their national origin,” U.S. District Court Judge Tanya Walton Pratt wrote in the order. “Although the State says it has a compelling reason for doing so—the safety of Indiana residents— the withholding of federal grant funds from Exodus that it would use to provide social services to Syrian refugees in no way furthers the State’s asserted interest in the safety of Indiana residents.”

Translation: Judge Pratt does not find your pants-shitting fear over Syrian refugees compelling, and also suck it, Mike Pence.

If you’re surprised by this result, you might be a moron. See, when our long national nightmare of Muslim toddlers from the scary brown people nation of Syria began, Republican governors banded together and proceeded to cry and cry and cry some more about how children fleeing a war-torn land is tantamount to ISIS sneaking into America and burning the whole place down. They were NOT about to let any of those people come in and destroy Our American Way Of Life with their Muslim-ing.

Do those governors have the authority to bar them from their American states? Shit no. Didn’t stop ’em from being dicks. Texas Gov. Greg Abbott tried SO HARD to keep the Syrians from lollygagging into his state, but he was too weak to stop them. Indeed, a federal judge ruled in February that Abbott was cordially invited to lick a dick with his efforts to keep those scary Islamics out. And now, right this very second, there are refugees learning to Remember The Alamo and that everything is bigger in Texas, et cetera. (INCLUDING JIHAD PROBABLY.)

Of course, this OMG SQUEEEE TERRORRRRRRRR! over Syrian refugees has been a feature of our national discourse for several months now. After the Paris attacks (which were actually not committed by 4-year-old Muslim Dora The Explorer fans, despite what you might have heard on Fox News), it seems if you had an “R” anywhere near your name, you immediately lost your shit. Donald Trump, Mike Huckabee, Ben Carson … all of ’em. Hell, Congress actually held an emergency vote on Syrian refugees, to let ISIS know that its mission of instilling fear in the hearts and minds of American idiots had been fully accomplished.

And now this! Oh well. Texas probably doesn’t exist anymore, and we guess Indiana won’t either after this ruling, LOL big loss.

We’ll close by reiterating our Official Wonkette Policy On Syrian Refugees, because what the hell, might as well say it again for anyone out there who is still too dippy to understand:

Of course U.S. America should take in refugees. It’s our fucking job. The alternative is to leave them stuck in hell, where they will either die or become radicalized against the United States. Or else we might as well replace the plaque on that nice welcoming statue in New York Harbor with one that reads, “Sucks to be you.” The lesson of World War II was supposed to be “Never Again,” not “leave ’em to die because they’re scary foreigners with the wrong religion.”

And if you don’t like it, go fuck yourself.

[Buzzfeed]

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  • Callyson

    جيد!

    jid!

  • Spotts1701

    Um, no offense Governor, but there isn’t really anything worth blowing up in Indiana anyway.

    • Painter of Goats

      Seriously. We used to drive through Indiana on our way to visit my Grandmother when I was a kid and I’m trying to remember something, anything about that state. I got nuthin’.

      • FauxAntocles

        John Mellencamp playing guitar in a cornfield?

      • marxalot

        I slept through it twice on a bus trip to Toronto and back.

      • chicken thief

        The Big Peach?

      • Smokahontas

        Gary. How can you forget Gary.

        • Whale Chowder

          You mean the original definition of the term “shithole?”

          • Smokahontas

            Anal libelz!!!11!1!!

          • Whale Chowder

            “Outhouse” would also have been acceptable.

          • Smokahontas

            Are we still talking about tossing salad? Because I’m into kinky, but I’m pretty sure an “Indiana” costs extra.

        • Celtic_Gnome

          I remember the first time I encountered Gary. There was this glowing orange cloud on the horizon that never moved. It turned out to be Gary.

    • handyhippie65

      that really long trip with only unidirectional turns is about it. i think it is 500 or so miles long. long way to drive to go nowhere.

    • Dudleydidwrong

      Someone said that birds fly upside down when crossing Indiana because there’s nothing there worth shitting on. I’ve never seen that but wouldn’t doubt it.

      • handyhippie65

        they find my truck often enough.

    • Blank Ron

      The Studebaker and Auburn-Cord-Dusenberg museums. And Wolf Park. I think that’s it?

    • Smokahontas

      I’d say that installing a hole where Indiana is would be an improvement. Although I’m sure there are some good Hoosiers too.

      • Celtic_Gnome

        The New Grand Canyon. Just down the road from Shelbyville.

  • schmannity

    But can Indiana bakers still refuse to bake those Sharia shortcakes?

  • Scooby

    On the bright side if they do impose Sharia law on us gays won’t be able to have any more pizza weddings …so we got that going for us.

  • dslindc

    “Fine, but no Christian Pizza for your creeping sharia party!”

    -Mike Pence, probably

  • Once again, I remain more worried about the prospect of crazy white men shooting up my mall, movie theater, restaurant, workplace, school, or kindergarten, than I do about a Syrian refugee doing it.

    • arglebargle

      Stuff happens.

    • Treg.Brown

      Armies of Lone Wolfs?

      • H0mer0

        binders of women?

    • gacl

      If you lived in Syria, you would face much less danger from Euro white men and much more danger from Syrians.

      • Well, sure, and if I lived on Alderaan, I’d be more worried about white men with Death Stars, or if I lived in Westeros, I’d be worried about… well, pretty much everyone.

        But I live in America where the weather report might include a 40% chance of light gunfire with a chance for overnight outbursts of flying bullets.

      • handyhippie65

        i am much more likely to be shot by a white hoosier, than a brown syrian, in indiana. i know i live there.

      • Dudleydidwrong

        You planning to move to Syria, gaci? Let us know how we can chip in for your trip.

      • chicken thief

        And if you lived in some upscale suburb in the Dallas-Fort Worth area, you face more danger from one of affluenza suffering neighbor kids than from Syrians or Euro white men.

      • Blank Ron

        Would these be the white men in the fighter-bombers overhead?

  • calliecallie

    As long as the muslins are willing to learn to play basketball, it should turn out okay.

    • weejee

      Often they’re the Kareem of the crop.

      • arglebargle

        Nothing but Annette. Wait a minute….

      • SterWonk

        Kareem was born in New York. I would say “… the Hakeem of the crop”, but nope, he’s from Nigeria.

    • baconzgood

      F1 racing libel!

    • TheBidenator

      Basketball? No, no, no! They aren’t tall enough but Indiana has Notre Dame and Texas loves football almost as much as they love guns, cowboy hats and inbreeding…

  • AngryBlakGuy

    …resettlement to Indiana should be considered “cruel and unusual”

    • weejee

      But, but, they have a fine Agricultural Institute in West Lafayette.

      / with apologies to Lot49

    • TheBidenator

      They will feel a little at home going to a place run by a bunch of corrupt religious extremists who discriminate against them for their holy text sez so….maybe it’ll lessen the culture shock to go from Assad or ISIS to GOP controlled states.

    • arglebargle

      I lived in Goshen, IN for four years. You are correct, sir.

  • chazmanr

    If Indiana no longer exists, where are Chicago felons going to go to buy their guns?

    • weejee

      Ferguson?

      • chazmanr

        No, that is where East St. Louis felons go. Wouldn’t want a turf war.

  • MrBlobfish

    Barack HUSSEIN Obama wants to impose Islam ON American and Imprison chrtians while making everyone HAVE Abortion so he can destroy American(!) by fundenatally DESTROYing Amireican rights and take away OUR guns so THE UN can invade and impose gay marrage on us!!!

    • chazmanr

      You forgot the part about implementing The New World Order, Alex.

      • Treg.Brown

        Beyonceilluminati Libelz!!!ALLTHENUMBERS!!1

    • The Wanderer
    • TheBidenator

      That’s interesting and I want to subscribe to your newsletter…now tell me your thoughts on how Globowl Warmnin’ is an IlluminttAI plot to burn our bibles an steel ar GUNS!

    • Hemp Dogbane

      Real Amercians know how to lock the CAPS !

    • Why am I Mr. Pink?

      HOW IS BABBY ABORT?

    • TheoLib

      I thought Planned Parenthood was already “fundenatally” destroying America ..

  • RoyalUglyDude

    The State’s conduct clearly discriminates against Syrian refugees based on their national origin

    Right. That was the point! Was that wrong?

  • handyhippie65

    this was on the news last night. dickshit is already seeking an injunction to stop it. i wonder how much of my hard earned tax dollars he will spend fighting this? one penny would be too fucking much.

    • Spotts1701

      Don’t you know that lawsuits to promote Republican hobby-horses don’t count against the budget? That’s Republican math.

      • handyhippie65

        it seems they flunked second grade arithmetic, then. i was taught better than that, and i was educated in indiana in the 70″s.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Wait. This was a federal court ruling. Who are they going to appeal to? The Supreme Court? 4-4 tie, baby. ‘Nuff said.

      • handyhippie65

        nobody ever accused pence of being a reasonable, rational human being. just a republican.

  • cousin itt

    Who’s going to take ME in from the shithole called the USAUSAUSA?

    • Treg.Brown

      • nmmagyar

        MMMMMMMMM! Delicious

      • Blank Ron

        Wow, all he needs is a flower in his buttonhole…

        • Celtic_Gnome

          Whoa. I read that as butthole.

  • TheBidenator

    God haven’t they suffered enough already? Now we want to send Syrians to the red Midwest, the deep South and Texas? Talk about crimes against humanity….

  • Lizzietish81

    Home of the HOLY SHIT IS THAT A BROWN KID WITH A GUN?! KILL IT!

  • pragmatist3

    Indiana is also planning to ban the tired, the poor and the huddled masses yearning the breathe free.

    • Nightflyer

      Hey, the Klan ran Indiana in the 1920s…their leader, William Stephenson, tried to do just that, until he got nailed for trying to nail an underage girl in a train, leading to her death.

  • baconzgood

    How much money was wasted on this grandstanding instead of cleaning parks or building schools?

    • Blank Ron

      AOT,K

  • TheBidenator

    Greg Abbott really needs to be shown out using the stairs….or the window.

    • Dudleydidwrong

      An honest defenestration is good for the soul. Heave Pence while you’re at it.

  • marxalot

    Said it before, say it again: after growing up queer, socialist, and Catholic in a place where you couldn’t toss a football without hitting some beef-fed bubba with a gun and a lot to prove, I ain’t scared of schoolchildren.
    Maybe these Scared White Straight God-Fearing Conservative types should cowboy the fuck up.

    • arglebargle

      You grew up Catholic? Now that’s scary.

      • marxalot

        I got over it! But everyone I knew for about 8 years was Baptist, and they freak me out to this day.

    • Pickwicknext

      Show us on the dolly where the priest touched you and how many times it happened

      • marxalot

        First, I have girl parts, and second, fuck you.

        • H0mer0

          a compatriot with a foul mouth (I’m a girl also too.) Religion is the opiate of the masses and stuff.

        • Pickwicknext

          I am a terrible person. I have admitted this several times.

    • Ilgattomorte

      I was born Catholic, in the same way other kids are born with diabetes. After years of treatment I went into remission. One good shot of atheism and I’ve been clear ever since. It’s a miracle!

      I just thank God that I got all of that God out of my system.

      • Lindambuckner

        “my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….

        two days ago new McLaren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month .,3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Hereoo!610➤➤➤➤➤ http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsHome/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:::::oo!610…..

  • Scooby

    To be fair I would probably want to live in Syria if I knew the alternative was Indiana.

  • YayConspiracy

    OMG, OMG, OMG! a terrorist! Oh, it’s just Cliven Bundy.

    • Don’t worry, he’s locked up (yay) so he can’t hurt anyone anymore…

      • YayConspiracy

        Phew! Those wingnut bigots scare the living shit out of me.

  • TheBidenator

    Can’t we just cordon off the red states to keep the stupid from leaking out? That’s pretty much my answer to everything they do by the way….it’s a good plan.

    • handyhippie65

      hey now, i enjoy my trips out of this fucking boot, don’t fence me in, bro! they would never let me back in, if there were a gate at the border.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Can we get them to pay for the cordon?

  • chicken thief

    To the fuckheads that elected Pence the court order just proves that their fear of Big Gubmint Tranny via unelected judges is justified. Pence lost in court, but won in the hearts and minds of the base.

    • Well, the hearts anyway, I’m not sure the minds exist to be won…

      • Blank Ron

        Comes to that, there’s not a whole lot of evidence that they have hearts either.

  • Vincent Ricola

    OT – I just got drafted to work the polls in my state this election. I’m
    gonna be on CNN ya’ll! Possibly for editing ballots to read Donald Duck
    instead of Donald Trump, but maybe I’ll decide to take my duties
    seriously instead! I’m shooting for the “sticker lady” job!

    • Drumpf*

    • chicken thief

      Watch out for the New Black Panther Party terrorizing the polling stations with their (one) billy club (in a land of >300M guns)!

    • Biff52

      Congrats, I guess? I turned down the county delegate job offer, myself, because I didn’t particularly want to visit Tonopah unless I was getting paid to do so, and it’s a volunteer position.

      Also, “sticker lady’? I thought Vincent was like the opposite of a ladyname..

      • Vincent Ricola

        I’m an enigma that walks in the shadows. I’m also a lady that lacks in creativity and was watching Vincent Prices movies while sick at home in bed the day she made her Disqus account.

  • TheBidenator

    Maybe the wingnut Christians are worried that Muslins will have terror-envy if they move onto their blocks?

  • AntiDerpomeme

    Is Pence legally required to use tongue?

  • Bureaucrap

    If only we could make official wonkette policy official US policy. Perhaps we could get Bernie to introduce it (wording intact) as a Joint Resolution.

  • gacl

    The official Wonkette policy quoted says that if we don’t invite and embrace refugees, “they will either die or become radicalized against the United States”. Wow, that is promising. Normal people should want to block those that would become easily radicalized again them from immigrating to their societies.

    I’m more sympathetic with Syrian Christians who’ve are being overtly persecuted by the Syrian Muslims. Somehow, I don’t think this crowd shares that concern.

    • Jonny On Maui

      Stand by, it’s coming…

    • Jonny On Maui

      Oh, just for shits-n-grins, I like most folk

      As far as religions. well, they can all go fuck themselves. You too…

    • YayConspiracy

      Because that’s the christian thing to do: To welcome all who are persecuted, downtrodden and in danger, irrespective of who they are or what they believe.

    • Lizzietish81

      Hello person who thinks that the Civil War was about State’s Rights.

      • gacl

        That is totally off topic.

        • Major_Major_Major

          And yet you don’t deny it. Lizzie is following a logical progression to the next waypoint.

          • Jonny On Maui

            Let’s see if he want to sell his daughter…

          • tehbaddr

            Na, he’ll lend out his sister for a sum, but only cause he wants her back.

        • Treg.Brown

          Off topic but spot on.
          Good thing they don’t allow comments here.

        • Lizzietish81

          Maybe, but it’s a good point to judge how stupid you are.

          The answer is very.

          • gacl

            That is quite the childish taunt. Let me guess, Ron Paul, PhD Thomas DiLorenzo, and others who express my Civil War perspective are also “stupid” because they don’t agree with your dominant herd mindset?

          • Lizzietish81

            LOL oooh Ron Paul and someone with a PHD

            That means two things, Jack and Shit…and Jack left town.

          • gacl

            that is literally the most childish comment I’ve read on the Internet in ages.

          • Jonny On Maui

            Wow! You really are new aren’t you?

            Enjoying the cluebat workover?

          • Lizzietish81

            So you’re 14 and just got browsing privileges.

            Good for you.

          • jmk

            Do you not read your own crap?

          • Bad Granny

            Be careful, these libtarts start out childish but they can accelerate to bawdy in under sixty seconds!

          • Smokahontas

            Oh yeah??!?11!! Well, na na na boo boo!

            That JUST HAPPENED!

          • YayConspiracy

            Oh! A PhD! All his thoughts must be correct!

          • Lizzietish81

            A state’s right to what sir?

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=roNmeOOJCDY

          • gacl

            To secede. A state’s right to secede. No Confederate sympathizer would be speechless, that’s the wildly obvious answer. That video is horrible. I get it’s left wing snark, but factually it’s horrible.

          • gacl

            BTW, both South and North were absolutely racist against blacks. Lincoln has tons of outrageously racist quotes against blacks and was quite willing to allow slavery to continue indefinitely. Lincoln’s top generals owned slaves in their immediate families. The idea that the North fought the war to end slavery is just completely absurd.

          • Jonny On Maui

            Well, when you’re dealing with a petulant child…

          • Spotts1701

            DiLorenzo has a PhD in economics. He’s about as qualified to propound upon history as I am about quantum physics. Even his supporters said that his “critical biography” of Lincoln was so riddled with errors and a “travesty of historical method and documentation” that it cannot be taken seriously by anyone who actually studies the field.
            But that was a lovely lie of omission. Very much like him.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          And apparently accurate.

        • YayConspiracy

          Caught you off guard, didn’t it?

    • AntiDerpomeme

      Normal people understand how to parse a sentence with an either/or structure.

      • gacl

        I parsed that: “they will either die or become radicalized against the United States”. gee, I’m sure US citizens are thrilled to share their society with those so easily radicalized against them.

        • Jonny On Maui

          A “Thank you sir, may I have another” if I ever saw one…

          BTW, I’d like to buy your daughter, what’s your price?

          • H0mer0

            does he realize that none of the wonkettariat really hold Israel, Qatar or Saudi Arabia to be role models as countries with regard to civil rights?

        • chicken thief

          Marco, don’t you have a town hall meeting or fund raising dinner to attend?

        • MarkM

          From where I’m standing it looks like U.S. citizens are pretty fucking easily “radicalized” against just about everyone who is deemed a “threat” by Rethug politicians and Faux News. Ted Cruz thinks we should find out if sand can glow in the dark. Donald Drumpf wants to build a wall, deport millions of people and ban ALL Muslims from entering the U.S. How hard do you think it would be for him to recruit members of the Drumpfenproletariat to staff concentration camps? Not very hard, I think.

          Fear and ignorance are the handmaidens of intolerance and inhumanity. Thank you for illustrating that so effectively.

          • gacl

            If “radicalized” is closing your doors to complete foreign needy refugees, just about every nation on Earth is radicalized. Japan doesn’t allow any Muslim refugees. Israel doesn’t. Even the Arab Sunni Muslim gulf states turn away other Arab Sunni Muslim refugees in need. India quite literally shoots to kill at any refugees trying to enter from the Bangladesh border.

          • Lizzietish81

            France, which was attacked by terrorists meanwhile, let’s in thousands of refuges.

          • gacl

            Yes, France was attacked by refugees/immigrants or the sons of refugees/immigrants. That is not a happy story.

          • Lizzietish81

            And then they let in more. Why? BECAUSE THEY’RE NOT CHICKEN SHIT COWARDS.

            eta: also correction, they were not refugees, the attackers were born in Europe.

          • gacl

            I did say “sons of refugees/immigrants”. Are Japan and Israel and Saudi Arabia and Qatar and UAE and Kuwait and Argentina cowards for not inviting Syrian refugees? Or just making self interested choices.

          • Lizzietish81

            Yep they’re cowards.

          • Jonny On Maui

            You really have a problem that we’re not like the rest of the world, don’t you.

            For the rest of us, that’s a good thing…

          • Biff52

            Yeah, like if China jumped off a bridge, USAmerica should too, posited America’s Mom…

          • thenearesthippie

            This isn’t about what other countries are doing. This is about what America — touted by Americans as the greatest, bravest, most moral, most noble nation ever — should do.

        • Latverian Diplomat

          Well let’s see, democratically electing a black President turn a bunch of Americans into drooling Tea Party morons. The Sandy Hook shooting caused a bunch of idiots to scream “False Flag” while running to the gun store to buy more, and Trump saying that he could build an impossible wall for nothing got him first place in the Republcan nomination race.

          I think we could use some Syrians over here. Given what they’ve been through, their responses seem rather level-headed.

        • Shibusa

          US citizens already share their society with those so easily radicalized against them: Angry white male hate groups.

          • gacl

            If you don’t like whites, there are plenty of non-white areas to move to.

          • Lizzietish81
          • tehbaddr

            How about non-religious areas? NY and DC were the best I’ve found so far, got any other suggestions?

          • Lizzietish81

            Boston.

          • gacl

            China is overwhelmingly non-religious. Within the US, probably not, but the Christians + Jews generally don’t bother anyone.

          • Courser

            Excuse me, but Christians bother everyone, about everything, constantly.

            Modern Christians are a pox on society.

          • Smokahontas

            Watch out! You’re about to get troll burnt… Its actually kinda cute when they think they’re making a point.

        • YayConspiracy

          easily radicalized: like the guy who shot down three at a planned parenthood facility? Or those fine people in Oregon?

    • Treg.Brown

      “Normal people should want to block those…”

      2 out of 10 Ann Romney Othering points.

    • Spotts1701

      When you tell people who have committed no offense other than where they were born that they are no different in your eyes than the people who are trying to kill them, that tends to make them wonder if there’s something to the belief that we are “evil”.

      • gacl

        By that logic everyone is evil. Does Japan invite and redomicile non-Japanese refugees? China? How about Saudi Arabia and Qatar that have tons of wealth and fiercely claim the exact same Sunni Muslim Arab ethno religious identity that the Syran refugees have?

        • Jonny On Maui

          “Ohhh, we’re different, how terrible…”

          fuckin coward…

        • Villago Delenda Est

          Well, let’s see. Nominal Christians ran the Holocaust, so that makes all Christians evil.

          I think we’re done here, jackass.

        • Spotts1701

          That whooshing sound was the point going right over your head.

          The point is that when radical elements are saying to people who are not radical at all we are “the Great Satan”, it tends to have an effect when we act out of irrational fear and blame all Muslims for the violence of the very small minority (despite the fact that the majority does denounce the minority, repeatedly)or identify them all as terrorists.

          Never mind that the ones we do let in are a very, very small fraction of the total number and they have to go through an extensive vetting process. It takes at least a year just to be vetted to be approved to maybe relocate here. Plus they have to get a job, reimburse the government the costs of bringing them in, and agree to be monitored by ICE and DHS for 10 years. If they don’t, back on the plane to Damascus.

          • Blank Ron

            It is easier for a violent sociopath to get their hands on a gun than it is for a Syrian child to enter the US.
            Yeah, let’s be scared of the child.

          • gacl

            Is Japan and Qatar and Kuwait acting out of irrational fear by not inviting and redomiciling Muslim refugees?

            Regarding the strict refugee checks: Consider the story of Obama’s aunt. She was legally ordered to be deported, but fought it and won, she never worked a US job, and lived on all kinds of government aid programs. On paper, I’m sure there were strict checks to stop all of that. In reality, they didn’t.

          • Lizzietish81

            First question: yes they are

            Second Question: You just compared an old lady with terrorists.

          • Spotts1701

            Oh, I love the “because it failed once we must not do it” fallacy. It’s so cute.

          • Shibusa

            It must be terrible to be gaci, scared of everything and everyone, all the time.

          • gacl

            You are quite literally choosing to view the standard tribal nature of all humankind as an “irrational fear” or phobia.

          • Smokahontas

            Actually, that’s called xenophobia, and it’s not something to aspire to… If you’re not a dick.

          • thenearesthippie

            Humankind’s “standard tribal nature” is something to be overcome, not embraced.

          • gacl

            The nuclear family is of course the very basis for human tribal nature. Do you seriously think we should overcome rather than embrace the nuclear family?

          • You’re out of your league here, sweetie. Go play on the freeway.

    • Major_Major_Major

      With regards to your first paragraph, you do realize that you are playing into the stated fears the radicals are using to gain support. OTH, by letting people escape the war torn country and likely death, and instead get to experience USAmerica as we profess to be (melting pot, land of opportunity,etc.) we have effectively nullified a large portion of the radicals argument.

      As to the second, I don’t think anyone wants to keep the Syrian Christians out, just to provide a safe haven for all Syrians fleeing their country.

      tl:dr Nice attempt at concern troll with a smidge of straw man, and GFY

    • Treg.Brown

      When should we start tearing her down?

      • gacl

        That’s just a sign. So what? The US never had an open door policy to all immigrants. That is absurd.

        • Jonny On Maui

          Went to school in Texas, didn’t you…

        • MarkM

          Dismisses one of the most famous symbols of America with a wave of his hand…

          https://youtu.be/m3dZl3yfGpc

        • Treg.Brown
        • Blank Ron

          ‘It’s just a sign. We actually think all you wretched refuse can just stay home, thanks.’
          This is why people think that groups like ISIL have a point, you twit.

        • jmk

          So when did YOUR family get here, genius?

        • SK

          That’s just a sign.

          Very perceptive!

          So what?

          So read it.

      • “So you finally did it! You elected Donald Trump! GOD DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!!!”

        • Blank Ron

          Suddenly the whole series makes sense.

          • H0mer0

            I for one, welcome our furry primate overlords…

    • Are you one of those “dumbz” I’ve heard so much about?

      • nmmagyar

        Keep reading down. The answer is “Yes”

        • Villago Delenda Est

          Yes, he’s pretty obviously one of the people determined to give Daesh what it wants.

    • Lizzietish81

      Let’s see about that…

      “Despite their minority status, Christians have long been among Syria’s elite. They have been represented in many of the political groups which have vied for control of the country, including the secular Arab nationalist and socialist movements which eventually came to the fore.

      The founder of the Baath Party, which has ruled Syria since 1963, was a Christian, and Christians rose to senior positions in the party, government and security forces, although they are generally not seen to have any real power compared with their Alawite and Sunni colleagues.

      Although, like other Syrians, they had very limited civil and political freedoms, Christians are believed to have valued the rights and protection accorded to minorities by Hafez al-Assad, who was president between 1971 and 2000, and by his son Bashar.

      A large proportion of the country’s Sunnis also tolerated or supported the Assads, whom they saw as guarantors of stability.

      When pro-democracy protests erupted in Syria in March 2011, many Christians were cautious and tried to avoid taking sides. However, as the government crackdown intensified and opposition supporters took up arms, they were gradually drawn into the conflict.”

      Oh, it looks like rather than being persecuted, they were pretty privileged.

      http://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-22270455

      • Blank Ron

        There you go again, bringing facts to a troll fight.

    • Shibusa

      Frankly, I’m most sympathetic to Syrian children (no matter what religion they’ve been raised in) than anybody else.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      I don’t care if the refugees worship Donald Drumpf as the one true avatar of Mammon, if they’re refugees, they need our aid.

      And you can go find a fire to stand in.

    • tehbaddr

      Hey now! We got a live one on the line, and it can spell and use punctuation and all that also, too.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      Somehow I doubt you give a rat’s ass about them other that that they are Christians you can prop up as your sacrificial persecution this year.
      Fuck the fuck off. Liberals care about ALL persecuted people- not only the ones who pray to the same sky daddy as us.
      You know, like Jesus told us to do.

      • YayConspiracy

        Jesus? Who’s that?

        • Usedtobeyellerdawg

          I think he works for Trump.

          • mrpuma2u

            Na, he was too low energy, and not classy enough.

          • Lizzietish81

            What kind of loser get’s himself crucified?

          • Celtic_Gnome

            As his gardener or poolboy.

        • thenearesthippie

          He mows my lawn. I pay him next to nothing. America!!!!11!

    • This is a liberal snark site. Are you aware of that? ‘Official wonkette policy’ is like ‘the onion’s editorial position’.

      That being said, the official wonkette policy on refugees is pretty spot on in my world view.

      • gacl

        This is a left wing political humor site. The political opinions expressed are completely genuine.

        • Blank Ron

          You haven’t been here long, have you? Why don’t you go sit quietly in the corner and learn something.

    • Shut up.

    • SK

      Gimme money. Wait, who’ve are is grammatically wrong.

      • gacl

        thank you. fixed. that was an editing error.

        • SK

          You mean, you made the error when you edited your comment once before? What was it before that?

  • Shibusa

    Indianapolis Horizon Christian Fellowship School morning drop-off line next week:
    http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s–HihYjpqy–/c_scale,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/19gp376lgq9bnjpg.jpg
    Thanks, Obama.

    • Skwerl King

      Crossroads of America!

    • beavertank

      Are those the welfare cadillacs I keep hearing so much about?

  • nmmagyar

    Evan appears to be “Mad About A Thing”. Must be contagious around here.

    • boll ocks

      Mad about many things, I’d wager. As we all are.

  • MarkM

    Isn’t the point of America and:
    “Give me your tired, your poor,
    Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
    The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
    Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed, to me:
    I lift my lamp beside the golden door.”
    that they will become Americans once they are exposed to freedom, democracy and opportunity? If you fear that they will not assimilate, aren’t you tacitly admitting that maybe America isn’t all that it could and should be? (Remembers that Donald Drumpf is leading the Republican presidential race) Okay, maybe you have a point…

  • Creepoman

    You can’t say micro-penis without Mike Pence. And yes, I am ashamed to still be talking about this.

    • laineypc

      Obligatory micro-penis libelzzz!

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Hey, MIke Pence is goveror of a state named in honor of people who should have been more careful about letting in immigrants. It’s heritage, not hate, or something.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    Evan, I love your translation from the formal language of legal discourse to what the fuck is going on here.

    Home of the Brave, my ass.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Although the State says it has a compelling reason for doing so—the safety of Indiana residents— the withholding of federal grant funds from Exodus that it would use to provide social services to Syrian refugees in no way furthers the State’s asserted interest in the safety of Indiana residents.

    “But we used the magic Scalia words ‘compelling State interest’…wait, who just died?”

  • STATE GUVMINT: We don’t want no fancy furriner terrist befowlin’ our Godly soil!

    FEDERAL GUVMINT: We’ll pay you a hundred bucks a head to take ’em.

    STATE GUVMINT: Can we get paid extry for the preggers ones?

  • Jen_Baker_VA

    Does anyone else besides me notice that whenever the R-shitweasels are “withholding funds to make us all safe” they are always Federal dollars?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Thanks to Republican financially wizardry, state funds are hard to come by.in the states they run.

  • fawkedifiknow

    Six Pence, none the wiser.

    • Zippy

      he can kiss me my ass

  • Anything that makes Republicans poop their pants makes me happy. :)

  • dshwa

    Another good thing about Fat Tony being dead is there’s practically zero chance the Supremes overturn this either.

    • Me not sure

      “We know how he would vote, so that should count.”
      Americans for Necro-jurisprudence.

  • Joshua Norton

    Any sane person’s attitude toward Syrian refugees doesn’t come from a bleeding heart place, but from a “don’t be a bunch of goddamned idiots who play right into the enemies propaganda” place.

    • eddi

      Pragmatism is dying right alongside of charity and decency.

    • laineypc

      Funny how those go together.

  • Arnnmann

    Concern Troll (below) was banned before I could reply, but I did want to get in this shot:

    Oh, now you must be among the righteous of the earth. If that’s the case,then there’s this.

    “For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?”

    So saith the founder of your religion. And of course, you know what happens to the blindly righteous. According to that same, er, authority:

    “Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels.”

    So there’s that. For more, you can always read the 25th chapter of the gospel according to Matthew yourself, I guess.

    • Robyn Ryan

      well…

  • CriticalDragon1177

    Man Sharknado was a stupid movie, but not as stupid as the Islamophobic “counter jihad’s” reaction to the Syrian refugees.

    • Lord-Nash

      Watch the RiffTrax live version, it’s glorious.

    • What, did they unleash a Octoquake on them? (Uh-oh, the execs at Asylum are now getting An Idea)

  • Takoma DC

    If we consider for a moment that Timothy McVeigh, Terry Nichols, Ted Kyzcynski, Dylan Klebold, Eric Harris, George W.Bush, Condaleeza Rice, Dick Cheney, Paul Wolfowitz, Donald Rumsfeld, Adam Lanza, Dylann Roof, Elliot Rodger, Christopher Harper-Mercer, Ted Bundy, Jeffrey Dahmer, Gary Ridgway, John Wayne Gacy, James Huberty, Charles Starkweather, Michael McClendon, James Holmes, Robert Hawkins are, like 99% of all spree and serial killers, American.
    We’re going to have to redefine “threat” “terrorist” “danger.”

    • Fred Dobbs

      I applaud you!

  • Celtic_Gnome

    The best part, with a probable 4-4 tie on the Supreme Court on the ruling, there ain’t a damned things Mike Pence can do but comply.

    • Lord-Nash

      Actually, I think the Supreme Court cases are on hold until a new Justice is confirmed.

      This is actually why Republicans have an interest in confirming someone…the District circuit courts are where these cases lie (and their rulings apply) until they can be decided by SCOTUS. And the District courts are mostly Democrat.

      • kareemachan

        Actually, that’s not the case. The Supreme Court has heard and decided a case since Scalia died.

        • Lord-Nash

          My fault.

  • Ducksworthy

    Like this?

    • Oh, Bush, on the first date? SOMEBODY is pretty “easy” aren’t they?

  • Robyn Ryan

    been saving this…

  • alnnc

    Where does that judge get off with overruling the guv simply because his action does not really do anything for the safety of Indiana residents. Doesn’t she know that according to the federal appeals court covering Texas in an abortion case, it’s not the court’s responsibility to determine whether the state administration is lying or not? I mean, why would a court be concerned about truth or facts, right?

  • Me Guest!

    Dang, I always miss the bun fights, but maybe it’s just as well, my BP won’t stand much more.

    Here in Canada, the last of the (pre-screened) 25,000 Syrian refugees Prime Minister Trudeau promised to admit just arrived from Syria and various refugee camps. Yes, there are a few Chicken Littles running around screaming “The sky is falling,” but otherwise the biggest problem is finding accommodations. Some families are stuck in hotel rooms awaiting an apartment, but that problem appears to be mostly in Vancouver and similar low-vacancy-rate locations (Vancouver’s is 1/2 of 1 percent).

  • boll ocks

    Judge Pratt, we need more judges like you. Way to hold the line.

  • crazymonkeylady

    Indiana Politics: You will find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. I’m going there to see my daughter tomorrow. Poor girl. Surrounded by rednecks, bible-thumpers and very poor taste in fashion.

    • Riley Whodat Venable

      Be carefull where you buy pizza.

    • Rachel

      Kentucky might actually be worse.

  • Lindambuckner

    “my .friend’s mate Is getting 98$. HOURLY. on the internet.”….

    two days ago new McLaren. F1 bought after earning 18,512$,,,this was my previous month’s paycheck ,and-a little over, 17k$ Last month .,3-5 h/r of work a days ..with extra open doors & weekly. paychecks.. it’s realy the easiest work I have ever Do.. I Joined This 7 months ago and now making over 87$, p/h.Learn. More right Hereoo!610➤➤➤➤➤ http://GlobalSuperEmploymentVacanciesReportsHome/GetPaid/98$hourly…. .❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:❦A1:::::oo!610….

    • Party Thug #24

      Bessie!!!

  • Lord-Nash

    And even if…IF the judge ruled that Indiana could stop payments to those agencies, Indiana should be forced to give the federal money it would have paid back to the government with interest.

  • Sterculius

    I bet Pence already had that money earmarked to go to his cronies to build a for-profit prison and a for-profit gay conversion therapy warehouse.

  • blaid droog

    Fortunately for me, I will be dead before sharia law becomes the law of the land. Right now I’m much more worried about xtian fundie insanity becoming law.

    • laineypc

      really they aren’t that far apart

      • kareemachan

        Baka.

  • laineypc

    So under this bone headed idea, refugees would stay there but without resources to get shelter, food, or education. And when they start doing things out of desperation to obtain basic necessities, lo and behold, safety concerns! Governor was right all along.

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