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American thinker.
American thinker.

Ted Nugent is upset, everyone. Barack Obama is his enemy, and he hasn’t jerked off to Megyn Kelly in at least two weeks. So he went to his old friend Alex Jones to talk through his feelings. Like, did you know how everybody’s got a dick in their butts and also America is in bad shape because we have never seen the moviefilm Old Yeller?

I believe that the reason America is stupid, apathetic, uncaring, slovenly, and allowed Barack Obama to become president … it’s because we didn’t play Old Yeller in our school system … there should have been an Old Yeller day. Then there should have been a patriot movie day. Then there should have been a Braveheart movie day. Then of course there should have been a Dirty Harry day.

Ted Nugent REALLY liked movie day when he was in school! Sure beats “learning things in classes.” Anyway, here is why Old Yeller is the reason for the season and how this relates to getting rid of all the liberals:

I don’t care why he’s foaming at the mouth, I don’t care how he got rabies, he’s rabid, get rid of the damn dog. When Old Yeller brings us slippers, give him a biscuit; when he foams at the mouth, you shoot him between the eyes. Any questions? You got to do it. America, you got to cleanse this country. No, I’m not talking about shooting anybody. I’m talking about dealing with an outrageous condition that is painful and traumatic and frustrating, but if you don’t face the beast, you’re dead, and that’s what’s going on.

The beast is lie-brals.

Literally right after that quote, Ted went on to say he is “buoyant and effervescent” right now because he killed a deer and gave his dog some fresh deer livers to eat. Then he said liberals are “subhuman freaks” and that “If I didn’t laugh I’d probably throw up blood, it’s so insane.” THAT DOESN’T SOUND VERY EFFERVESCENT, TED.

In conclusion, he says Ted Cruz and Donald Trump are the only hope for America, and if you don’t fight against the liberals like the rabid Old Yeller dogs they are (by shooting them between the eyes, METAPHORICALLY), then you are “bending over and taking it in the ass,” and Ted Nugent does not like that one bit, unless he does. You don’t know.

Here’s the video, if you hate yourself and want to endure 10 full minutes of these blockheads:

[Right Wing Watch]

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