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They're also keeping Texas safe from Yeti attacks
They’re also keeping Texas safe from Yeti attacks

A group of armed protesters stood around with guns and signs outside a mosque in Irving, Texas, Saturday to protect the Lone Star State from the imminent threats of sharia law and/or terrorism. After a few hours of making mosque members nervous and getting approving honks and thumbs up from passing traffic, they left satisfied that disaster had, for the moment, been averted. One protester, in his early 20s, brought his mom along, possibly in case of accident. Several protesters wore masks to protect their identity from those who would do America harm.

Irving, you may recall, is the charming town where they don’t care for Muslim kids playing around with clock innards. After being arrested for bringing a home-reassembled clock to school, Ahmed Mohamed got to meet President Obama, and then his family moved to Qatar, which is friendlier than Irving freaking Texas. So congratulations, dickbags, you chased the one smart kid out of town. But maybe there were more smart Muslims hiding in the mosque?

The protesters outside the Islamic Center of Irving didn’t specifically mention the threat of 14-year-olds tinkering with electronics, but they were very concerned about the Paris attacks and wanted to send a message that they do not want any Syrian refugees coming to Irving, where they might build more clocks or launch jihad. Rally organizer David Wright, who brought a “tactical shotgun” along, explained to Dallas Morning news reporter Avi Selk that the group was carrying the boomsticks “mostly for self-protection.” But, he continued, “I’m not going to lie. We do want to show force. We’re not sitting ducks.” Wright’s group calls itself the “Bureau of American Islamic Relations,” a play on the Council on American Islamic Relations.

anti-CAIR

Get it? They’re loaded for BAIR.

Wright also claimed he had heard Muslims in Irving had made death threats against Mayor Beth Van Duyne, who’s become a minor rightwing hero for her loud warnings earlier this year that area Muslims were setting up sharia courts. (The fuss was actually over a private mediation service, which was no different from those run by Catholic or Jewish groups, except it involved Muslims, therefore Creeping Sharia.) Selk duly noted that the Dallas Morning News hasn’t seen any verification of the supposed death threats, but Wright insisted they were real enough to justify being prepared to use deadly force:

“We don’t want people to think we’re out to kill people or shoot people,” Wright said as dozens of Muslim worshipers and students at the Islamic school pulled out of the parking lot past him, some standing in groups to stare at the protests in wonderment. “It would be ridiculous to protest Islam without defending ourselves.”

This is absolutely true, because other ridiculous protests at mosques have also involved guys carrying semi-automatic rifles to defend themselves from scary Muslims.

Irving City Council member David Palmer, who was notified of the protest by a member of the mosque, dropped by the protest wearing non-tactical sweatpants to see what the bother was all about.

“Does it look like there’s any threat here? Nobody’s even close to them,” Palmer said, standing in a parking lot where police cars nearly outnumbered the four or five mosque members who watched the spectacle.

“My initial impression was they were using them for intimidation,” Palmer said. “I doubt that they’d be happy if some of the Muslim churchgoers here showed up at their Christian church, their Baptist church, their Methodist church tomorrow morning with rifles slung over their shoulders.”

That seems awfully cynical, Councilman Palmer! We’re quite certain the anti-Islam gun-humpers would rush out to congratulate the Muslims on their fine understanding of their Second Amendment rights, and perhaps to engage in an impromptu exchange of firepower for the sake of comparison purposes.

Mosque leaders warned members to avoid engaging with the protesters, and they kept clear of the gun-toting patriots. Selk said the small number of mosque members watching the demonstration either declined to comment, or said that they thought freedom of speech is a wonderful thing. Even when it’s weird speech.

One of the protesters, who wore a name tag reading “Big Daddy Infidel” and withheld his real name for safety’s sake, told Selk that while he isn’t looking forward to it, he is prepared to kill to defend Texas from radical Islam if he has to:

“You know, I hope 10 years from now, we just stood out here and froze to say what we wanted to say, and nothing ever came of it on either side,” he said quietly. “I hope the supplies I have in my house, the food and the water and medical supplies, I have to use up in my retirement years.”

But, he concluded, “This stuff is among us. People are blind if they don’t think it is.”

Big Daddy Infidel did not specify whether he’d purchased his supplies of dried food from Glenn Beck, WND, or Jim Bakker.

After a couple of hours, the protesters headed home, and as of Monday morning, it would appear that Texas has still not fallen under radical Sharia law. Raving paranoia may still be a threat, however, so it couldn’t hurt to buy more guns and supplies for your bunker.

[Dallas Morning News via ThinkProgress / WaPo / Image from Avi Selk on Twitter]

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  • Nounverb911

    Irving Texas? Sounds Jewish.

  • SnarkOff

    Not wishing ill on anyone, but why the hell do teh Islamic terrorists keep threatening New York and Washington? Why don’t they go after these assholes?

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Apparently, they are!

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Professional courtesy

      • kindness

        Yes. They see the derp is deep with these.

    • Thaumaturgist

      They’re too scared to go to Chicago. Because gangs.

  • Spotts1701

    “We don’t want people to think we’re out to kill people or shoot people,” Wright said

    So this is what cognitive dissonance looks like in real time. Fascinating.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Which is why we’re carrying around all these metal penii of death.

      • Calling dibs on Metal Penii of Death as the name of my kink-positive gay metal band. Warning: shows are adults-only, and the videos are NSFW.

        • marxalot

          Sell plain white t-shirts (logo on the back maybe) for $5 to anyone who wants to get into the “splash zone.” DIY fully custom concert shirts!

          • $5? Obviously you don’t know how capitalism works, comrade. $55!

        • Zippy

          so basically Nazareth meets the Tubes…

          • Villago Delenda Est

            Fee Waybill can get SO behind that concept…

          • mtn_philosoph

            Don’t touch me there.
            Spank me there.
            Don’t touch me there.
            Touch him instead.
            Don’t touch me there.
            Touch me over here.

    • Cranky Man

      That twitching tringer finger says you’re a liar.

  • MsAnthropesMr

    The coldest it got in Irving was 31 degrees F over the weekend. Big Daddy is a giant weenie. Him freezing was like that girl from WIldfire dying in a killing frost.

    • marxalot

      I’ve often felt that the real affront of Texas cold is not the temperature itself so much as the contrast: unlike so many things in this jaded world, the overnight change from 80 degrees to 30 still has the power to shock.

      • Werewolf

        Overnight? I’ve felt the temp drop from 70F to 45 in an hour. I hate it when the the high temp is at 7:00AM.

      • mtn_philosoph

        If you want to really feel cold, sit around in 40 degree weather all day, and then remain there as the temp drops down to 30 after sundown.

        Bonus points if you don’t eat anything prior to or during the wait.

    • SnarkOff

      Busted down his stall.

      • MsAnthropesMr

        Jesus, won’t that hoot owl shut the fuck up?

        • SnarkOff

          Six fucking nights in a row.

          • jodyleek

            She’s coming for me, I know. Haven’t figured out if that’s good or bad.

    • Joe Beese

      FREEDOM HAS NO TEMPERATURE

    • Wonkaholic

      It’s not the cold, it’s the stupidity.

  • Lance Thrustwell

    I think it’s always good to assume there’s a problem before there’s any evidence it actually exists. Paranoid fantasies are too often overlooked as a source of good ideas!

    • Painter of Goats

      Yes, like weaving from side to side when you are driving behind a car transport truck, just in case one falls off.

      • MsAnthropesMr

        Here, I thought you were drunk! Good to know.

      • Beaumarchais?

        I’m glad I’m not the only one who does that!

    • Paranoia is the mother of invention! I think that’s the expression…

  • Toomush_Infer

    All complexes live in Texas…

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      All our messes live in Texas.

      • Querolous

        If your gonna play in Texas (you gotta have an idiot in the band)

    • lovelydestruction

      And Texas is the place I’d dearly love to secede.

  • Nounverb911

    Aren’t the Ten Commandments Sharia with a different name?

    • Thanks But No Tanks

      Yes, the alternate name for both is “A bunch of bullshit”

  • Villago Delenda Est

    So, Daesh has indeed opened up an American branch. How exciting!

    • OneYieldRegular

      They even have matching uniforms!

  • cousin itt

    so it couldn’t hurt to buy more guns and supplies for your bunker.

    You know who else had a bunker?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Archie and Edith?

    • AntiDerpomeme

      actor212? Oh, you said “bunker” not “bunk.” Never mind.

      • SterWonk

        I have a bunk too! Post anything sexxxy enough, and I’ll go there. ;-)

        • AntiDerpomeme

          I accept that challenge

          • Villago Delenda Est

            I can’t unsee that.

          • SterWonk

            You and I clearly have very different definitions of “sexxxy enough”. But you do you. ;-<

          • jodyleek

            What the hell happened to Shrek?!?

    • Enfant Terrible

      Anyone who has seen Sarah Silverman in a swim suit?

    • Zippy

      Boston?

    • Thanks But No Tanks

      I’m honestly worried about the bunker gap with ISIS/ISIL/Daesh/fucktards

    • richardgrabman

      Archie Bunker?

      • pumpkinspiceheroincat

        No, EDITH.

  • Painter of Goats

    The Lone Brain Cell State.

    • btwbfdimho

      Wins the intertubz.

    • Zippy

      where even the stupid is bigger

    • Steverino247

      The derp at night is big and bright…

  • Anarchy Pony

    I wonder if making people feel like criminals and treating them them with suspicion at all times will at all make them feel alienated from the rest of society and thus more willing to lash out…

  • Enfant Terrible

    Dear Irving, Texas:

    DAESH uses the narrative that Muslims in America are being oppressed by assholes with semi-automatic weapons to recruit new followers. And here you are, feeding DAESH’s narrative! Doing *exactly* what DAESH wants you to do!

    And you call anyone who is sympathetic to religious minorities “sheep” who are easily led by the nose! Shoot, you don’t even need nose rings to be led around! Well played! Not really.

    With utmost sincerity,
    ET

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Providing aid and comfort.

  • Seaside

    Armed religious zealots from a barren, oil-rich area protesting armed religious zealots from a barren, oil-rich area.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Our barren, oil-rich areas are better than their barren, oil-rich areas.
      Or at least, Jeebus loves them more.

      • Joe Beese

        Back in the innocent days of the late 1980s, long before Manhattan was haunted by the specter of Islamic Terror™, I lived there with my father. Near our apartment was an all-night magazine store I liked to shop at. One night the owners, who I would guess were Pakistani, were silently enduring the beliefs of one of their customers. “Mohammed’s no different than any other man,” he explained. “Some day he’s got to stand before Jesus and be judged.”

  • Joe Beese

    <>

    That seems like a missed opportunity for outreach. “Hi, neighbor. I was just admiring your AR-15. Is that a Bushmaster? Has it fed 5.56 NATO rounds reliably for you? I’m, uh… asking for a friend.”

  • Somehow I still remain worried about being killed by Jim Bob Dumbshit strolling down the street with his tactical shotgun than I do of the people going to worship in the Mosque.

    • OneYieldRegular

      A friend who was dining next to one of the restaurants hit in Paris, and who spent the night in the kitchen afraid for her life, wrote to say that despite the Paris attacks, she still feels much safer on the streets of Paris than she felt when she lived in the United States.

  • gene108

    If the solution to Islamic Terrorism is that guy in the camo outfit, with a green baseball cap, sunglasses and big gun, why the fuck is he just wasting time in Irving Texas and not lending the world his wonderful insights and abilities to combat a problem threatening many countries around the world.

    I think that guy owes us all an apology for being a lazy ass mofo and needs to step up and end Islamic Terrorism as he is the solution.

    • SnarkOff

      I was thinking, why doesn’t he enlist in the fucking military?

      • Steverino247

        Because he’s insane.

        • Thaumaturgist

          In the infantry, Insanity isn’t a bug, it’s a feature.

          • Steverino247

            I knew some screwy people in the infantry, but nobody really crazy. A few burn outs, guys who actually liked killing, one guy in Korea who thought getting a blow job after having vaginal intercourse with a prostitute would prevent him from getting an STD…

            Hey, wait a minute!

      • Painter of Goats

        Because he just wants to look brave. He doesn’t want to actually be brave.

      • marxalot

        Boy’s got trouble taking orders, see, and reading to the end of a sentence without using his finger, which is a problem given that his always seems to be on his tri**er.

        • Villago Delenda Est

          This is my weapon, this is my gun. One is for fighting, the other for fun.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        He’s a damnable coward, like all the rest of these pathetic shitstains.

        • Thaumaturgist

          Being a coward never did me any good. Nor did my allergies, like to lead.

      • Jenny

        Because his mom is worried he might get killed?

        Also, because he’s got this tic, right, and it isn’t safe for the military.

        And there’s that one time he assaulted his recruiter when the guy told him he needed to get a clearance note from his doctor to serve.

        Oh and some failed drug tests, and he didn’t get his GED.

        But other than that…

        I bet he just knows he would be a great soldier ready to do all the soldier things, but instead he is here defending that curb. How sad. :(

        • Werewolf

          Sarge, I’m just 18, got a ruptured spleen, and I always carry a purse….?

          • Thaumaturgist

            S’all right. Gheys is welcome in Obumer’s military.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Have you seen some of those gays in the military? They’d kick this crowd’s sorry asses six ways to Sunday.

  • Count Awesome

    A 20 year old brought his mom to this? Milennials can’t do ANYTHING without their parents being around to support and help them out.

    • Joe Beese

      Helicopter bigotry

      • He probably expects a participation ribbon.

        • SuspectedDemocrat

          They’ll stop at the trophy store on the way home. And then maybe some ice cream.

          • Celtic_Gnome

            I highly recommend Graeter’s Bourbon, Pecan, Dark Chocolate Chip.

    • Angry_Cop

      Adam Lanza – same thing. Went on to shoot 21 kindergartners
      Chris Harper-Mercer – 10 of his fellow college students
      Eliot Rodgers – 6 of his fellow college students.

      The common thread? MOTHERS who set their kids up with money, guns and hatred, and then ignored all the warning signs.

      • pumpkinspiceheroincat

        Ah, fuck. Sweetie…..SWEETIE! Put the PS2 down and tell mommy where you hid the armalite….

  • CriticalDragon1177

    Oh my God, Muslims are practicing their freedom of religion here in America! The horror!

    • Villago Delenda Est

      There is unfortunately a substantial number of people who think that “Freedom of Religion” means you get to pick your Christian sect. All other religions need not apply.

      • CriticalDragon1177

        I know. Bryan Fischer comes to mind.

      • Thaumaturgist

        Jesus and TJ wrote the Constitution for theyselves, meaning Christians, not no Mooselems.

      • jmk

        These folk love to go with the justification that Islam isn’t a religion but a political system masquerading (they’re so sneaky!) as a religion, so the First Amendment doesn’t apply.

        It’s always fun to ask these dolts if they realize that the First Amendment covers political beliefs and speech also too.

  • marxalot

    Irving’s gross. That’s where the Trinity Broadcasting Network is headquartered, btw. Rent’s cheap, as is life.

    • Jenny

      Yup. I lived there decades ago because the commute to work was less than 2 miles and my apartment rent was under 400 a month. But my car insurance went up 300%, evidently living in Irving puts you at risk to stolen cars and idiot drivers.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Whodathunkit?

        • Jenny

          Not I because I grew up in the busted down shadow of a navy base. Irving was paradise in comparison. But for some reason, living in Irving was a bigger risk than living in a neighborhood that pizza, ice cream and UPS trucks would not go to.

    • beatbort

      And, if memory serves, it’s where the most hated sports team in America, the Cowboys, attempt to play footsball.

      • Jenny

        They moved to Arlington.

        • beatbort

          Ah, that explains why they now play as though they live in a cemetery.

      • PubOption

        Is their training ground still in Irving, on the Avenue of Champions?

    • richardgrabman

      And Lee Harvey Oswald’s home town.

  • weejee

    Are their any proper brassieres for these boobs? Perhaps something in a Woody Allen vein?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      You’re thinking of “Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex”, aren’t you?

  • Rick Hill

    Jade Helm was a red herring people!! Wake up!!
    (If that makes no sense to you then…just keep reading elsewhere. It’s not meant for you to understand…)

    • Joe Beese

      I’m not sure what to make of the fact that my adopted state of Utah was one of the “hostiles”.

      It’s true that you can’t get decent Chinese food here, but as long as you’re heterosexual, we’re pretty harmless.

      • witsended

        Egg foo yong, chicken chow mein and beef and broccoli – in many places, food like this would be a typical Chinese takeaway meal.
        But in China, most people have never heard of any of these western favourites, which have not been served in local restaurants before.
        One restaurant called Fortune Cookie is trying to change that. It’s the first to serve American-style Chinese food in Shanghai.

        http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-34896355

        • Mavenmaven

          What do you call Chinese food in China?

          • witsended

            Woof, Woof or Meow.
            My evil alter ego made me do it.

          • eddi

            Cantonese food, anything with legs except the table.

          • Redstart

            When I was in Beijing with my tai chi school, we sat down in a restaurant that actually had bull’s peenie on the menu. One of us jokesters (not, I sir!) tried to order it but they refused, as they only serve it to folks of the male persuasion.

          • eddi

            That is one heck of a lot of yang to lay on someone’s plate. ?

        • laineypc
  • Lot_49

    Ammosexuals are a-fear’d of brainwashing and indoctrination because they are themselves victims of it.

  • CriticalDragon1177

    Look at all these armed “patriots” standing up to defenseless Muslims. They think they’re so “brave.”

    If you guys really want to fight “Islamic terrorism” why don’t you go to the Middle East and fight ISIS, instead of wasting your time here fighting the imaginary “Creeping Sharia / Stealth Jihad?”

    • marxalot

      Yeah! Go “fight them over there so we don’t have to fight them over here.” And leave the rest of us the fuck alone.

      • Make sure your will clearly indicates what we’re supposed to do with the supplies you have in your house, the food and the water and medical supplies, you have to use up in your retirement years. Just in case.

        • Redstart

          Put a seal on the door, open it up in a hundred years (assuming there are any people that survive the climate upheaval), valuable time capsule!

      • CriticalDragon1177

        These “patriots” would all get slaughtered by ISIS, or they’d flee in terror. Plus they couldn’t join forces with the locals, even if they let them, since most of them are Muslims. Most likely, these “patriots” would leave us all alone after that, since they wouldn’t be able to do much of anything after trying to take on ISIS, since they’d all be dead.

        Ironically they’d end up emboldening the terrorists, by sending them the message that Americas are morons who are really easy to kill, which would make things worse for all the civilized people in the world.

        • bupkus23

          We already seem to be sending them the message that Americans are morons who are really easy to panic into actions that only make things worse for themselves…

          • CriticalDragon1177

            Unfortunately I have to agree, but those bigoted idiots going over there to fight ISIS would only make it worse.

    • Zippy

      because they’re all really a bunch of pants shitting cowards?

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Nail. Hammer. Hit.

        • Thaumaturgist

          They’re fighting from behind, the Atlantic Ocean, that’s all.

          • jmk

            It’s strategery…

  • Jeff Ackerman

    Did you notice the Soldier of Fortune magazine sticking out of Big Daddy Infidel’s back pocket? That is where he found all the latest fall fashions.

    • Zippy

      that and a trip to Bass Pro

      • BehaveYrself

        and rent boys, also too

  • Relativicus

    Anonymous, masked, and armed. If that doesn’t spell “courage,” I don’t know what does because I never learned how to spell.

    • Redgyal

      It’s spelled K-L-A-N.

      • r m reddicks

        Synonym for S-T-O-O-P-I-D-Z?

      • eddi

        Also D-A-E-S-H. I’m getting a lot of irony in my diet lately.

        • Redgyal

          Oh. The best way to fix that is to take some bowel cleanse.

          • BehaveYrself

            yeah, just watch out for the santorum.

    • Thaumaturgist

      Don’t insult me from Europe; insult me to my face!!!!11!!!

  • fawkedifiknow

    This is just like the guy who was standing on a street corner in mid-Manhattan with a banana in his ear. A passerby asked him why. “To keep elephants away” was his explanation. To the observation that there were no elephants nearby, he replied, “See? It’s working.”

    • Lefty Frizzell

      “Do you know you’ve got a banana in your ear?”

      “I’m sorry, I can’t hear you! I’ve got a banana in my ear!”
      or
      “Know it? I wrote it!”

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Homer Simpson: “I’d like to buy your banana, sir.”

  • Zippy

    “We don’t want people to think we’re out to kill people or shoot people,”

    Heavens, what would give people that idea?

    • D Ash

      I always thought the sideways-brim cap was the giveaway. Was that wrong? Should I not have thought that? Hmmmm, now I must haz a ponder.

  • blinkytoo

    The guy in the picture with the sign misspelled the message. I should read: I’m with stupid! ->

  • Skwerl King

    I always thought an armed society was a polite one, not one filled with asshole jerks hiding behind their guns.

    • D Ash

      It is all relative to the state of mind behind the finger on the trigger. Or else the lack of one. Pretty much common, these days.

    • eddi

      A polite society might be armed. But an armed society need not be polite.

  • btwbfdimho

    ““I hope the supplies I have in my house, the food and the water and medical supplies, I have to use up in my retirement years.”

    Hey, check the expiration date on those yogurts, they won’t last 10 years!
    These are people hoarding for the day after the apocalypses. They live in fear, here in Texas, in the US.where.nothing.happens.

    • D Ash

      Who was it who said, “Fear is the great mind destroyer.” I feel strongly that I read that in a book some while back. Anyone?

      • Villago Delenda Est

        • D Ash

          Well, I was close, but it was no hand grenade.

          • Villago Delenda Est

            And the number of the counting shall be three!

        • bupkus23

          The Bene Gesserit ( a religico-political cult ) litany from Frank Herbert’s “Dune”

  • OneYieldRegular

    “I hope the supplies I have in my house, the food and the water and medical supplies, I have to use up in my retirement years.”

    We do too, Big Daddy. We do too.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Isn’t that adorable. He consistently votes Republicans and thinks he’s going to be able to retire.

  • Thanks for the sign, guy in the second photo. I couldn’t see the other guy in the camouflage outfit.

  • r m reddicks

    “We’re not shitting fucks.” I think I fixed that for you.

    • Vecciojohn

      That’s right. They’re shitting bricks.

      • D Ash

        In Belgium right now, it appears to be shitting cats!

        • Villago Delenda Est

          Those Belgians. So wacky in the face of terror. Then again, they’ve been the cockpit of Europe for centuries. You learn to deal under those circumstance.

          • r m reddicks

            Waffling again. They never see the Kaiser rolling.

            Edited because I type like shit.

  • george gonzalez

    I recently did some business with a guy out in the sticks. $40 bucks changed hands and we chatted for a minute. During which I learned that the nearby concrete block house was his “shelter” in case “things go bad” and he would use the money to buy “supplies”. I made some non-committal remarks and made sure to leave at a brisk but not tire-squealing pace.

    • Zippy

      you really need to find a better meth dealer…

      • D Ash

        or move to a state which is thumbing its nose at the DEA?

    • jmk

      Was there banjo music in the background?

    • SuspectedDemocrat

      And if things don’t go bad, it’s also his retirement plan.

    • BehaveYrself

      Did he name tag read, “Big Daddy Infidel”?

  • Joshua Norton

    My attitude toward Syrian refugees doesn’t come from a bleeding heart place, but from a “don’t be goddamned idiots who play into the enemies propaganda” place.

    • jmk

      And from an “actions have consequences, dumbasses, so be nice to people now and reduce the crop of enemies you face later” place, also too.

  • r m reddicks

    Who could know that these freedom fries eaters would love them some Paris.

    • Vecciojohn

      We have always been at peace with the cheese eating surrender monkeys.

      • r m reddicks

        I’ll have some whine with that if you would, monsieur.

        • Vecciojohn

          And will you be needing a bucket?

          • r m reddicks

            Don’t see how not. I peer into it with the strangest of eye. “What the fuck is this?” I think. Then back to the Kelvinator.

  • orygoon

    Folks, the answer to “why aren’t these brave young patriotic men holding guns not serving in our official armed forces?” may well be that they applied and were not hired. The Spare joined the military some few years ago, and more recently, the son of a friend enlisted. They were quite carefully screened and had to be persistent to get in. (And they both knew losers at basic training who were sent home.) The services are really quite selective these days.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Bad experiences in the last 15 years have reminded the military of previous bad experiences. Lapses in institutional memory, coupled with the need for warm bodies to fill in the missing billets in the TOE can do that.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      Pickier than the RNC, that’s for sure.

  • Michael Smith

    These guys are definitely bad people, but they are also stupid. Isn’t there some way we can trick them into doing things that a good person would do?

    • Vecciojohn

      Distraction often works. We could tell them Obama is building a secret Kenyan moon base where the refugees will be trained in terror tactics. There’s only one solution. Donald Trump needs to spend his billions on a rocket we can use to invade the moon. All True Patriot Americans must put on the camo costumes and go out to the forests and drill and practice eating Tang from a tube. After we do that, we can elect Newt the G as Lord Protector of the moon until hostilities cease.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Then there’s the mid course correction on the way to the Moon that takes them to the Sun!

      • clubseal

        You’ll need to give Aerosmith a call, because when the shooting starts, you don’t want the patriots to miss a thing. In space.

  • btwbfdimho

    What would Jesús do?

  • Brewerofbeers

    I really wish someone would stand outside their church with guns.

  • chascates

    And if Christianity is a religion of peace and tolerance . . .

    • D Ash

      . . . then, as Gandhi said when asked what he thought of Western Civilization: “I think it would be a good idea!”

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Jesus, pretty good guy. His followers? Definitely a very mixed bag.

      • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

        What most people forget about Gandhi is that he was a horrible racist who championed apartheid in South Africa, and abused his grand niece.

        He only believed in nonviolence when it suited him.

    • It’s like extremists aren’t moderate, or something.

  • orygoon

    Another reason why these Texans may not have joined the military? Some do it to see the world. But these guys may reason: they’ll send me somewhere that’s hellish hot, unreasonably violent, and oversupplied with religious bigots. So what would be the point?

    • Villago Delenda Est

      You mean like Texas in the summertime?

    • eddi

      I doubt they could pass the written test. Or even the physical. You still need at least two teeth that mesh.

    • BehaveYrself

      *They* say they won’t sign up because they refuse to support Pres Obama as Commander in Chief. *I* say maybe they’re just infected pussies…

    • Wombat

      People might shoot at them also too.

    • bobbert

      She told me to come, but I was already there.

  • JohnnyZhivago2

    Solution to Islamic terror????? Camouflage!!!!! It goes with EVERYTHING!!!

    • eddi

      In the middle of town. They are so special.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      And makes fabulous evening wear, too!

  • BoatOfVelociraptors

    What was that about clinging to their guns and their religion?

    • georgiaburning

      it was about 100 percent accurate

  • Callyson

    • Villago Delenda Est

      The shit never stops, I do fear.

      • clubseal

        Stop eating at Taco Bell.

    • theCryptofishist

      Can you repeat that in bunny form?

  • superdave

    I thought about checking out the comments on the Dallas Morning News story, but decided against it. I couldn’t handle the DERP.

    • ChicagoLovesYou

      Never read the comments (except on Wonkette)

      • jmk

        There are comments on Wonkette?

        • That_got_me_thinking

          No. They are not allowed.

    • richardgrabman

      Actually, the comments weren’t bad. the bedwetting brigade was getting plenty of pushback from normal people.

  • witsended

    The interview with those fine patriots was not only biased but censored.
    Why did they not mention the nice lady in red who said.
    I know that all these people of different cultures have brought many benefits to the United States, their impact on food springs to mind.
    It’s just that, now we’ve got the recipes……….

  • Mavenmaven

    How fast do you think those demonstrators would run if someone scary approached them?

    • gene108

      Guys amped up on their own superiority, and not wanting to look like cowards in front of their bros, are more likely to start shooting at the first sign of someone “scary” and let God sort it out.

      Basically what happened to Trayvon Martin or the kids, who got shot up in Florida, because someone else in the parking lot thought their music was too loud.

      • beatbort

        More like what happened at that Hooters knockoff when the rival biker gangs were fightin’ over the all-you-can-eat buffet.

  • listen2meIsmart

    Thank Republican Jebus they were there, can you imagine what Texas would look like with out Skeeter and his fleshlight, sorry gun, keeping us safe.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    And the first conservative Christian leader to call out gun worship as idolatry will be making an announcement at 10 to never.

    • BehaveYrself

      Same Christian leader is calling out Muslim clerics to call out jihadists, and the congregation throws fistfulls of money. I really don’t understand just wtf is going on anymore.

  • Seattle Rain

    Demonstrating outside of churches with guns?
    Beating up protesters at Trump political events?
    Screaming all Muslims are terrorists at town meetings?

    The 2016/2017 Republican Party is beginning to look a lot like Hitler and the early days of the Nazi Party.

    Shameful.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      The parallels are distressingly obvious. And these people are perfectly OK with it, too.

      • clubseal

        And some have the gall to ask how the Holocaust happened. Make people afraid of a certain group, suggest that they be registered, “just in case,” and the rest is up to the miserable wart on the Earth we call humanity.

        • SuspectedDemocrat

          And every year say, “We have to do what would be unthinkable a year ago.”

      • bupkus23

        They ain’t no parallels – them’s intersecting lines!

        • pumpkinspiceheroincat

          More like a Venn diagram with only one circle…

    • eddi

      If they had one clue what they looked and sounded like… Ah Hell, why kid myself. They would double down and fly a stars and bars decorated swastika.

  • They seem nice.

  • Msmlg1979

    Those outfits are great. So versatile. You can hunt deer in the morning, then go straight from the tree stand to your local mosque to terrorize people who have never done a damn thing to you, and still look sharp afterwards at the local waterin’ hole while you swill cheap beer and congratulate yourself and your fellow patriots for your principles and bravery in a world gone mad.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      People who wear camo to go hunting in the woods, without the orange vests, are wishing themselves to be turned into a statistic.

      • Msmlg1979

        Being outside in your own yard during hunting season is a dangerous prospect in my neck of the woods. You have to watch yourself, your kids, and your pets closely. Buck fever is a helluva drug!

        • Wombat

          If I had a dollar for every time even ONE of my friends has found some Responsible Gun Owner wandering their property without permission and SHOOTING TOWARD the house, barn, and/or livestock, I’d have a lot more time to comment on Wonkette (if comments were allowed, which they are not).

        • Redstart

          Never wear white mittens while hanging up clothes in your back yard, it can be fatal.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        They are wishing themselves to be turned into venison, even.

      • Redstart

        Seems to depend on which season. Deer hunters on my land wear blaze orange while turkey hunters wear camo. Maybe turkeys aren’t colorblind?

        • Villago Delenda Est

          The danger is from idiot humans with guns. If you blend into the background, you’re more likely to be shot due to movement, than if you’re wearing a color obviously not found in the forest.

    • pumpkinspiceheroincat

      And so nicely accessorized! Those scarves are on fleek!

  • 0gham

    Gun fetishists like to claim their penis replacements are for protection. Looks to me like they are for intimidation.

    • laineypc

      And itching for a fight maybe.

    • BehaveYrself

      Exzactly. Not only are these assholes unhappy with their dicks, they have no idea how to use them.

  • Beaumarchais?

    What could possibly go wrong?

  • TheBidenator

    Is it wrong of me to hope this happens every time I see a group of gun toting wingnuts wandering about?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhe58xORWG0

    • JH Marx

      I started brainwashing my son with ‘War’ since he was a tiny baby.
      It worked!

  • SnarkTank

    it would appear that Texas has still not fallen under radical Sharia law
    .
    Dunno ’bout that. It’s run by people who think that women are chattel, religion is king, teh gheys is bad….Is there a word for Christian Sharia Law?

    • clubseal

      History.

    • tomamitai

      Is there a word for Christian Sharia Law?

      Dominionism.

  • TheBidenator

    Fascism comes to America carrying a gun, draped in a flag with a cross necklace and dribbling from its mouth….

    • Thaumaturgist

      And the dribble freezes on their chins, because the temperature is in the mid-40’s.

      • SK

        …proving yet again that global warming is a hoax

  • greyXstar

    GG, America! I’m sure absolutely none of this shit will be used by ISIS as ‘proof’ of their recruitment claims that we blindly hate Islam…

  • clubseal

    That was a smart thing that city council member said. Are you sure he was from Texas?

    • georgiaburning

      My guess is that he’ll be leaving soon

      • Land Shark

        tied up in the back of a rollin’ coal duellie heading towards Mexico …

  • chicken thief

    “…some of the Muslim churchgoers here showed up at their Christian church,
    their Baptist church, their Methodist church tomorrow morning with
    rifles slung over their shoulders.”

    Which I reported on my blog True American Patriot as:

    Some of the Muslims showed up at Christian churches,
    Baptist churches, and Methodist churches with
    rifles.”

    Do I get a James O’Queefe Award for Excellence in Selectively Edited Content?!

  • JustPixelz

    The heated rhetoric from Trump, Cruz … well AOTK … combined with that Jihadist In The White House makes inevitable some Muslim deaths at the hands of folks like this Texas crowd mob. And when it happens, wait for Trump, Cruz … well AOTK … to blame the victims.

    • HanBarbara

      Knowing these Morans, they will likely kill Sikhs that they’ve mistaken for Muslims. It’s happened before.

      • Redstart

        Tomahto.

  • JustPixelz
    • laineypc

      I was just going to post something similar saying that the armed Texas patriots actually think this is super cool and they are jealous.

    • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

      I’ll raise you my Kurdish peeps in the YPJ. They scare the pee out of ISIS.

      • HanBarbara

        Yeah, they sure look subjugated by their menfolk

        • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

          The Syrian Kurds operating in the YPD autonomous zone of rojava have built the only truly feminist, egalitarian society the world has ever known. They’re also the only true democracy in the Middle East, since Israel, being an apartheid state, doesn’t really count as democratic as a result (democracy for *some* of the people is not democracy)

          • Jen_Baker_VA

            Pretty cool. I wonder how long the west will allow them to function?

          • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

            No worries. Obama already sold them out to Turkey for the use of an airstip, so not long.

          • “The Syrian Kurds operating in the YPD autonomous zone of rojava have
            built the only truly feminist, egalitarian society the world has ever
            known”… er, I support the YPD fighting ISIS, but you are sucking down an incredible amount of propaganda/wishful thinking there.

          • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

            How so? Show your work

            I also think you mean the YPJ/YPG is fighting ISIS, although for my part, I mistyped PYD as YPD – an unfortunate habit my fingers have developed – one of the many difficulties with the Kurdish acronym soup.

          • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

            The AI link is interesting.

            The WAPO is birdcage liner that will always twist things toward US interests, which means by extension, Turkey’s.

            I’m not seeing any sourcing from the Syria Untold link- just a lot of accusations. The one about PYD working with Assad is just nutty.

          • “Not only have the PYD never been elected to anything in their entire
            history, but they have concerned themselves with smashing every modicum of opposition, including those who were initially committed to their project. They’re building something akin to a Marxist-Leninist one party state. The veneer of ‘libertarianism’ and ‘anarchism’ is a genuine absurdity, one only ever referenced by PYD members, their supporters and white western leftists.” – a Syrian Arab leftist

            https://www.amnesty.org/en/latest/news/2015/09/syria-abuses-mar-pyd-fight-against-terrorism/

          • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

            Well, considering I know people who are over there right now, I think I’ll withhold judgement, since patience will give it to me firsthand.

          • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

            > The veneer of ‘libertarianism’ and’anarchism’ is a genuine absurdity, one only ever referenced by PYD members, their supporters and white western leftists.” – a Syrian Arab leftist

            And this statement is a logical absurdity.

            Of course detractors aren’t going to praise the PYD. Otherwise they’d not be detractors, would they?

            And at least half or more of the westerners I know who are aware of and support the PYD aren’t white, so the statement is false on it’s face, besides being illogical as well.

  • georgiaburning

    Second Amendment- Sacred! First Amendment- not so much. It’s clear which sort of worship is in practice

  • Leema Raven

    That is a lot of stupid, right there.

  • That_got_me_thinking

    The solution to Islamic terrorism is a grinning moron?

    • eddi

      No. a mob of grinning Morans.

  • House0fTheBlueLights

    Note to self: don’t go to movie theaters or college campuses in Texas. Probably stay away from the courts also too.

    • Land Shark

      and the legislature too also.

      • theCryptofishist

        And towers.

        • Redstart

          Fertilizer plants, grain silos.

  • I_Buttle

    “After a couple of hours, the protesters headed home, and as of Monday morning, it would appear that Texas has still not fallen under radical Sharia law”.
    See? It worked!

  • eddi

    That is one well-organized militia you boys got there..

  • whitroth

    While you’re out there being terrified, could y’all tell me just what kind of shotgun ol Jeezuz H.”turn the other cheek” Christ would have carried?

    mark

  • UnsaltedSinner

    It’s like these characters have escaped from a Goon Show episode:

    Lt. Seagoon: German officer outside, sir.
    Major Bloodnok: I surrender!
    Lt. Seagoon: He’s a prisoner, sir.
    Major Bloodnok: Oh. Bring the coward and his money in!

  • Magic Juan

    “They’re also keeping Texas safe from Yeti attacks”

    What?!? Texas is getting attacked by coolers as well as muslims?….oh wait, you mean people’s Yeti coolers are being stolen don’t you?

    • Gleem-McShinez

      YETI COOTERS!!?

      Damn, I knew it! Operation Jade Planned Parenthood was REAL! They are trying to strike back with mutated vadge-monsters!!!1

      Oh, “coolers.” My mistake.

      STILL, BE VERY AFRAID!!1

      • OneDemin EOr

        Yesterday, I learned there is a coach for the Detroit Lions named Jim Bob Cooter.
        This knowledge is deeply disturbing somehow.

        • Redstart

          As disturbing as that hefty bearded Patriot’s defense coach named (Matt) Patricia?

    • HanBarbara

      It works as well as my white cat keeping my home free of mummies. She would claim that she takes her job very seriously.

  • Playonwords

    Driving slowly past these guys would seem to be the only good reason for having a truck Rollin’ Coal”

    • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

      I prefer balloons filled with pepper spray. It’s more eco-friendly.

      • theCryptofishist

        But they have to be compostable balloons that wont end up choking sea turtles.
        See turtles are cute! Or magnificent! Or otherwise not deserving of choking on a balloon.

        • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

          Very true.

          Does anyone else appreciate the irony of me learning how to make pepper spray in bulk by reading the scribblings of right wing nutter, Kurt Saxon, and thus making this possible and economically feasible in the first place?

          • theCryptofishist

            I’m just impressed by your reading the scribblings of right wing nutter Any Guy. Because: scribblings. Because: right wing. Because: nutter. My brain would just stop.

          • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

            When I was a teenager I had some prepper friends – a side effect of being an anarchist, even back then.

            Not that I agreed with most of their politics, but knowing what’s in Army field manuals, knowing how to disassemble, repair and modify firearms, and knowing how to engage in urban guerrilla actions against the state are areas where preppers and anarchists tend to share common ground, despite being very left, and the others being very right.

            I’m still an anarchist, but my former prepper friends are leftists now. =D

          • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

            Adding, The Poor Man’s James Bond series is pretty much mum on politics. An anarchist who didn’t know who Kurt Saxon might not have any idea he was basically fascist by reading that series. It was all basically instructions on how to do things, not political views.

        • danah gⒶz ❤?❤

          Your screen name makes me want to adopt “neofoodalist” as my screen name.

    • CriticalDragon1177

      Rollin’ Coal is pretty much the best way to tell people you don’t care about the environment. That would send a rather mixed message to other liberals, not to mention possible give these “patriots” grounds to sue you for making them sick.

      • HanBarbara

        Also, not good for your engine. The excess fuel washes oil from the cylinders, or so I’ve heard.

        • Jen_Baker_VA

          True enough. A Neighbor of mine thought he was being all funny and cute doing the coal rollin schtick and then his engine died and he was all sad.

          • OneDemin EOr

            Hahaha

          • Mehmeisterjr

            Reverse schadenfreude? Is that a thing?

          • Mehmeisterjr

            Making a statement is far more important than understanding what statement you are making, right?

        • Markuserektus
      • Playonwords

        Meant as a joke, my mistake.

        • CriticalDragon1177

          Well, they would kind of deserve it, actually.

  • thewitchqueen74

    Can’t we just give Texas back to Mexico already??

    • richardgrabman

      Hasn’t the United States done enough harm to Mexico? We could have all avoided this had anyone listened to Lucas Alemán, the Mexican foreign minister in 1844, who proposed accepting the Texas Republic as a French dependency. Given that the French and Texas both think they’re the center of the universe, and everybody else is weird, it’d probably have worked out pretty well.

    • Bolshevik Crimes

      I think California (Mexifornia) with all of the regressive liberal cultural Marxists should be given back. Jerry Brown should feel right at home leading a bankrupt and corrupt third world banana republic Mexican state.

      • thenearesthippie

        California should just become its own country. As a tax-paying Californian I’m tired of supporting deadbeat red states.

        • Land Shark

          Hear, hear!

      • just_jim
        • Mehmeisterjr

          Clueless is as clueless does. Kansas is bankrupt. Donald Trump’s sucker investors went bankrupt (repeatedly.)

        • theCryptofishist

          Yeah, 8th largest economy in the world!
          *pumps fist, does other victory-dance type things*

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Cultural Marxism must account for the unending Tikhon Khrennikov musical festivals we encounter, day after day. No Bieber? Really?

      • Walter Wellstone

        You got it wrong, son. California has a budget surplus.

        • Mehmeisterjr

          They’re cramming their cultural Marxist surplus economy down out throats!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111,1!!1,11,1!111!!,!

          • theCryptofishist

            And we’re making you like it, too!
            Beg for more, Mehmeister, beg for more.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      That’s what we could use to pay for that yooge wall!

      • BeliTsari

        Hell, soon we’ll be able to stock the Ohio & Potomac with piranhas. Let the remaining bridges fall under the weight of their trucks. Just use all the remaining TVA grid to electrify the wreckage, like YOOJE bug zappers!

      • just_jim

        We’d have to pay Mexico to take Texas. So how can we use that to pay for the wall?

        • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

          Blackmail. Either build the wall or we force Texas back on you!

  • HanBarbara

    If we end up with a right wing President, Congress and Supreme Court, these are the people who make sure we all get with the program. Freedom my oversize ass. You can see it starting to happen at Trump extravaganzas already.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      Program or pogrom?

      • theCryptofishist

        potato, potahto

  • Jen_Baker_VA

    Fucking mask wearing pant shitting cowards.
    You really want to stop ISIS, fucktards? Sign the fuck up. You are NOT protecting our nation by what you are doing. You are, in fact, making it a more dangerous place to live.
    Put up or shut up you yellow bellied weekend warrior wannabe chickenshits.

    • richardgrabman

      Sign up for what? Is the U.S. really sending ground troops to fight ISIS? Please??? Where’s the money for Haliburton in that?

      • Swampgas_Man

        This country needs a goddamn Foreign Legion. Or Day Camp, or somegoddamnedwhere to send these cosplayers.

        • Mehmeisterjr

          We have a Foreign Legion. It’s called The Carlyle Group.

      • Jen_Baker_VA

        I was watching on the PBS that a bunch of weekend commandos from the UK were self enlisting with whichever side they thought were the good guys and junk. If they really wanna go fight them, they can is the point

        • Mehmeisterjr

          Feet in search of boots?

          I’m sure that Blackwater or Xe or whatever it calls itself today can arrange it. Just be sure you have your term insurance paid up to the limit.

          • Walter Wellstone

            Nah… These fuckers won’t pass the physical. They’re useless.

        • theCryptofishist

          They could always pretend to join ISIS, then bring it down from within.

          (Actually, that wouldn’t work, but it’s no less fantastical than their little fairy story.)

  • OneDemin EOr

    Talk about an all-around shit world view, past, present, and future:
    I hope I have to use my emergency supplies in my retirement years? WTF?
    Scottie Hughes, spokesperson for the Tea Party, kept insisting on CNN, “You never hear moderate Muslims condoning terror attacks!” She repeated this statement several times, despite S.E. Cupp and Brooke Baldwin both using the word “condemn”, trying to get Spouting Scottie to realize her error. She never did catch on.
    These people cannot express themselves in English, for god’s sake. And they want to “take our country back”? I agree: back to the 1850s.

    • richardgrabman

      IN the 1850s, most English speakers used the language correctly.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Well, not Sam Weller.

    • docterry6973

      And of course many Muslims around the world have condemned terror attacks, but if she refuses to listen then I guess she isn’t lying.

      • Redstart

        I dunno. I kind of agree with the Muslim woman who said asking ordinary Muslims to condemn Muslim wackobirds was the wrong answer. I certainly feel no need to apologize for the Westborough Baptist lot. And there is a hilarious Twitter stream of Muslims apologizing for other things, like algebra. See #MuslimApologies.

    • just_jim

      At least Scottie Hughes got it right. I never have heard moderate Muslims condoning terror attacks, instead they condemn the attacks.

      • bobbert

        Yes. An accidentally true misstatement.

        • Mehmeisterjr

          Vocabulary! How does it work?

  • MikeyArmstrong

    Most boys stopped playing G.I. Joe when they were twelve.

    • Bolshevik Crimes

      Now,….with the regressive cultural Marxists running things boys are no longer playing G.I. Joe. Boys are being shamed away from that and encouraged into becoming sissified sycophantic pansies that grovel at the feet of bullies….like Muslim terrorists.

      Oh pleeeease Mr. terrorist don’t hurt me. I promise you that I will make a good bitch. I will cook, bake,clean and bend over on command, but you have to promise not to hurt me because I bruise so easy.

      • bbcaaat

        You have been misinformed by your thought installers in the lame stream media.

      • NanBullenshede

        What. an. Arsehole.

        • Mehmeisterjr

          You are far more concise than I am.

      • thenearesthippie

        Is this a political manifesto or a job application?

        • Mehmeisterjr

          Dear Sir,

          I believe I would be a great G. I. Joe salesman because I tend to fly into hysterical panic the second those ISIS baddies push my buttons.

      • just_jim

        Frightened, Ignorant and Cowardly is No Way to Go Through Life, Son http://whatever.scalzi.com/2015/11/20/frightened-ignorant-and-cowardly-is-no-way-to-go-through-life-son/

        Or maybe those of us who aren’t right wing cowards aren’t cowering in fear from the terrorists. The terrorists may have won as far as you are concerned, but some of us aren’t impressed by the the Islamic version of what the extreme right wishes they could do.

      • Mehmeisterjr

        Now,….with the regressive cultural Marxists running things boys are no longer playing G.I. Joe. Boys are being shamed away from that and encouraged into becoming sissified sycophantic pansies that grovel at the feet of bullies….

        I’m old enough, pre-G.I. Joe, to remember when parents were urged (by right wing nut jobs) not to allow their boys to become sissified sycophantic pansies by playing with dolls, referring to G.I. Joe dolls, passed off crass merchandisers as “action figures.” So I’m not sure that Joe is going to work with surviving Birchers and Koch-suckers.

        Anyhow, say what you will about the Bolshies but, far from projecting effeminacy, they set the standard for overblown, militaristic bullshit.

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQhDYIcwR-w

        complete with penis substitutes out of your most fevered open-carry wet dreams. (See photo.)

        That’s why they got their actual dicks caught in the bear trap of Afghanistan. History, pal.

        The rest of your message (the make-up and dress-making classes stuff) screams of someone so deep in the closet that he is spooning his G.I. Joe dolls back there.

        • theCryptofishist

          *swoon*

      • Walter Wellstone

        So, you got a thing for G.I. Joe. That’s OK. We don’t judge.

      • Markuserektus
      • Bammac

        (Laughing at you) The closest these losers will ever get to a terrorist is on X-Box in their single wide salon. It’s not the “cultural Marxists” pissing themselves and gunning up at the threat of a bunch of refugees fleeing war- it’s your kind, filling their pants like their hero the “Nuge”, clutching their GI Joe with Action Arms and Real Feel beard in one hand and their pansy 9 (with genuine Punisher grips!) in the other, bedwetter.

        Have fun in Toyland.

      • doktorzoom

        Moran has been banhammered, comment left up for amusement

  • TundraGrifter

    Oakland’s Black Panthers tried that walk around with rifles and shotguns thingie when Ronald Reagan was our governor. The result? Stricter gun laws.

    You betcha!

    • Gerald Parks

      AND extermination of the Black Panther Party!

  • docterry6973

    And they wore their camo and trucker hats too, bless their hearts.

    • Catstro

      Their white robes were at the cleaners.

    • Jerry Noneofyourbizz

      And some of these, also, too, as well:

      • Land Shark

        One would assume they rolled coal on their way out. It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

        • Laffing Crow

          Hubby came home from work awhile back saying the new temp had a truck with two big exhaust pipes jutting out of the bed and huge initials PR on the back window with arrows pointing to the exhaust pipes. He asked me, “You’re on the internet all the time, do you have any idea what the fuck that is?”

          We watched some “activists” do their Prius Repellent thing on youboob and knew the new hire was a complete and absolute idiot with some profound “masculinity” issues, that he probably couldn’t easily afford on a temps wages. This led to the realization that PR subliminally stood for Penis Replacement.

          So, mean guy hubby goes back to work and relays this assessment. Someone else provides the info that the PR mod costs some bucks and it ruins your truck, the guy paid money to ruin his truck. His nickname became PR and it wasn’t for Prius Repellent. He was not happy.

          He was a temp, so he’s gone now but I’ll bet he doesn’t get the enjoyment that he used to from those consonants on his rear window. We feel just terrible about that. Really!

  • Catstro

    My hunting loving, Jesus loving cousin and her hunting loving, Jesus loving friends were posting about this with comments like, “I will pray for them” and “they need Jesus”.

    It took me a second to realize that they were talking about the open carry GI Joe nuts.

    They really are losing all but the most zealous.

    • Jen_Baker_VA

      Thank God the religious crazies are starting to see at least. Or at least, your particular ones.

      • Catstro

        To be fair, they’re not crazies, just really, *really* sincere.

        • Bammac

          Yuck. Even worse.

          • Catstro

            I have both in my family, and I will take the sincere but annoying Jesus lovers over the batshit crazy Jesus lovers any day. I mean, in the end I know both parties think I’m going to hell because I don’t accept Jesus as my personal savior, but group one at least believes in welcoming the refugees and that Trump is pure evil, and they make a mean pound cake. The second have literally zero redeeming qualities.

          • Bammac

            Pound cake gains anyone a dispensation. Same goes for those who make good mashed potatoes, or knows their way around a Cornish pastie…

  • D_C_Wilson

    Camo, masks, and semiautomatic weapons. And these were the guys protesting against terrorism?

    • handyhippie65

      ironically, with terror. or, mebbe stupidly, one can never be sure bout these things.

  • bbcaaat

    Intimidation with a weapon is a felony, hope there are lots of trials for this after the 1st of the year in Texas.

    • Mehmeisterjr

      But it’s OK because National Security!

  • Vegan and Tiara

    “My initial impression was they were using them for intimidation,” Palmer said. “I doubt that they’d be happy if some of the Muslim churchgoers here showed up at their Christian church, their Baptist church, their Methodist church tomorrow morning with rifles slung over their shoulders.”
    Good point, Palmer!

  • That 20 yr old that showed up with his mom also wants to join the Army, if his mom will ever let him.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    Knights Derplar.

  • Celtic_Gnome

    We just stood out here and froze? In Irving, Texas? Come on!

    • Mehmeisterjr

      I damn near frozen my ass off (in an all-wool band uniform, yet) in Dallas, so it is not impossible. Though, I think in this case, this guy is exaggerating his martyrdom just a tiny little bit.

    • Markuserektus

      The guns hafta compensate for the cold weather effects on certain parts of the male anatomy.

  • Sterculius

    Why didn’t the police show up and shoot them all? Oh, that’s right, they were grown men with real weapons, not a little black kid in a park with a toy gun. Oh wait … that’s odd, were any of them black? Bah, I’m sure it was an equal racial mix.

    • Alex Grey

      HEY!!!! Racism is over in ‘Murica!11!!!1!!

  • Walter Wellstone

    Fucking pussies won’t even show their faces or give their real names. I’m sure they would all shit their pants if they came across an ISIS militant high on meth, armed with an AK-47 and a suicide vest coming at them shooting first and asking questions later. These idiots have no fucking clue what war looks like and how shit smells in battle and how fucking noisy it is but they think they’re tough and brave just because they’re good at Call of Duty. Fuck these pathetic motherfuckers.

    • Jessica Salcedo

      damn straight!

  • Markuserektus

    Maybe Mr. Mohamed will win something

    http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-34904226

  • BeliTsari
  • Stein Olsen

    They are sure to keep their asses far away from where the actual fighting takes place and then claim they are the solution to terror. Well done.

  • Glenna Jones-Kachtik

    If they want to really fight against Sharia law & the Muslim hordes I know several places that would allow that to happen & they get to carry their guns while doing it. We have the Navy, the Marines, The Army, The Air Force, The Coast Guard – they are welcome to join up & go fight on the front lines. Not that any of these doofuses could now pass a physical or make it through boot camp but they could join up.
    There is just no excuse for this type of crap – in TX or anywhere else either.

  • Bammac

    Thank Gawd for goofy X-box commando virgins and their hokey tacti-cool toys, stump stupid ignorance and brainless, lightweight, almost-made-cheerleader Moms.

    I feel much safer….

  • Laffing Crow

    The Patriots here in Texas have been fighting the Muslim threat for years now. There is a well known Iranian restaurant owner in Kerrville who was building a larger restaurant at a better location for his Mexican restaurant, which was the most popular in town. This was a little while after 9/11. When it became apparent that he had put a “terrorist” dome on it, all hell broke loose in the local newspaper. This guy had lived there for years, had gone from nothing to owning two restaurants (he currently owns five) and was now upgrading his first restaurant and no one had a problem with him. He puts a dome on his restaurant and suddenly he’s some kind of terrorist threat.

    In this case, it all went away rather easily. He wrote a piece in the newspaper explaining the dome and more importantly, he built a dividing wall down the back end of his parking lot and had a huge patriotic US flag mural painted on it. No one else in town had anything approaching that level of patriotic display and it made the complainers look petty and they eventually shut up. Muslim threat contained. Of course, now these same people are battling the threat to their religious freedom and businesses posed by gay cakes.

    I don’t know what it cost him to build an unnecessary wall so he could cover it in patriotic paint but obviously a lot less than letting the Muslim hatred fester enough to ruin his two businesses.

  • Soetoro Marx

    Wouldn’t it be fun if American Muslims take a tip from Tennessee Lieutenant Gov. Ron Ramsey – heck, even take his words – and send out the message:

    “While this is not the time for widespread panic, it is a time to prepare. I would encourage my fellow Muslims who are serious about their faith to think about getting a handgun carry permit. I have always believed that it is better to have a gun and not need it than to need a gun and not have it.

    Our enemies are armed. We must do likewise.”

    The right-wingers wouldn’t object to that, right?

    • thenearesthippie

      All the upfists!

  • Anita Ledford

    You should see his facebook page. He has lots and lots of friends and most of them are Ted Cruz supporters. He brags on his page that he was MENTIONED by “The Young Turks”. So all he wants to do is show off.

  • Angry and Short

    I live North of Dallas. Unfortunate, yes, but it’s about the only place I can find a job. Irving is no charming city, it’s a modicum of shit wrapped in the blight of aging sprawl.

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