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redrow 4Yr Wonkette  has been considering a move into high-end real estate as a way of diversifying our portfolio, which is currently a little heavy on dick joke manufacturing and political scandal futures. From the looks of this long-form commercial, “World At Your Feet,” from British luxury apartment purveyor Redrow Housing, our first step is to decide: where does today’s refined and ambitious covert psychotic killer want to live?

After watching this, we are intrigued but left with a number of questions. Do these apartments have basement storage units with optional Buffalo Bill containment pits? Do they offer lower-level starter rentals for check-forgers who are working their way up to murder? Do the linen closets have built-ins to hold all the plastic sheeting and power tools that a modern killer’s lifestyle demands?

Forget the apartment; we want to see his business cards!

Redrow seems poised to corner the insufferable new money market of strivers who have conquered London rather than being “swallowed whole” by it, who are chauffeured home after their women are safely asleep, and whose dark secrets remain artfully concealed among their slick new appliances and top-shelf liquor.

redrow likka

We can only hope there are a few of these types left stateside for us to lure into our Wonktower development, where the doorman will always be waiting with a smile and an alibi.

Update: After days of posts like this one, the ad has been pulled from Vimeo. Happily, Yr Wonkette was forward-looking enough to grab a copy and put it up on YouTube.

[Redrow Housing on Vimeo / YouTube copy]

You can follow Beth on Twitter. 

 

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