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Maybe you missed that there’s a sporting competition/clash of nations going on, so the NYT will make sure you have one million Olympics words to read. You think you don’t need to read those words because you already saw everything on TV, but you misunderestimate the NYT for their ability to run quirky pieces that get little details no one else does. Take, for instance, their piece on yesterday’s women’s mogul race. Did you watch moguls yesterday? Moguls are ridic, what with the skiing over horrifying enormous bumps and then also too needing to do flippy shit off of ramps mid-run. There was an American favorite in the race, Hannah Kearney, that you could not escape hearing about because American. The NYT covers a bit of that, but then goes on to tell you things like what music they played at the event.

Music played for the audience throughout the night — the competition started at 10 p.m. local time — and most of it was club beats layered on top of well-known pop and rock songs. “Smells Like Teen Spirit” was turned into the sort of number one would hear at a rave.

God bless you, NYT. We would probably buy that soundtrack, and we’d definitely attend the late-night mogul rave party.

The Times also covers the apparently abundant (but unknown to us) rumors that the USA and Russia are in some sort of Olympics detente and are colluding to fix the figure skating results. Seems probable, if only for the reason that we can envision Putin threatening the lives of everyone involved until a Russian medal in the sport was ensured. Oh figure skating, you hotbed of intrigue!

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