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Scary monstersGuys, guys, calm down now. You may have thought you finally found some voter fraud after all these years of searching far and wide and under every ACORN, but it is pretty clear to the Virginia attorney general, registrar and Board of Elections that you didn’t. To them, it is quite obvious that a guy working for the RNC conducting voter registrations, who was caught blocks from their office shadily throwing completed voter registration forms in someone else’s Dumpster, simply cannot be guilty of voter registration fraud, despite working for the company widely known to commit voter registration fraud for the RNC. How do they know this? Because nowhere on Virginia’s voter registration applications does it list party affiliation! Therefore, dude would have no way of knowing the forms he was throwing away belonged to Democrats. And there are so many other reasons he might have thrown away people’s applications! Investigation closed! Wait, really, the investigation’s closed? Sho nuff.

“There’s no way to tell by party when people fill out these forms, what party they’re affiliated with, so I don’t think there’s any political motivation,” Virginia Registrar Brandi Lilly said Friday.

Obviously, the folks being paid millions to do voter registration for the RNC in Virginia could not possibly have come up with any super sophisticated ways of knowing if they were registering Democrats or Republicans. Like for instance, they could definitely not use precinct data to determine if someone registering were statistically more likely to be a Democrat or a Republican. And they certainly would never use demographic data, like happening to notice if the person attempting to register was, say, BLACK BLACK BLACK OMG SO BLACK Y’ALL. And a third thing they would never do is happen to ask that voter while they were registering that voter if he or she happened to be Democrat or Republican. It is just logic!

So Brandi Lilly is obviously correct. There could have been no political motivation for throwing out those registration forms that one and only time (that Colin Small was caught). It must have been something else entirely to make that guy throw out those voter reg forms!

Like …

Like they said, case closed!

[WTVR, via Wonkville miner Terry]

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