SHARE

i'll pay you back!!!!!!!! in lightbulbs

Despite his glowing endorsement of both Mitt Romney and Mitt’s opponent Barack Obama back in January, John McCain has decided to switch to the other other other team and help out Michele Bachmann, who is broke, by hosting a fundraiser for the ex-never president and current and possible future congressional hologram. McCain will be paid in oysters and champagne, and Jon Huntsman will make a brief appearance to say “Romney is a sack of shit” in Mandarin. It should be fun. We want to go!

Really, this is happening! Bachmann is actually a mere one million dollars in debt, which in campaign finance terms is enough for about 20 yard signs and 14 bottles of Moet. So, the fundraiser will be in Washington some time this week, and it is unclear who will pay for that, but probably you. City Pages reminds us that it was just last summer i.e. a coon’s age ago when Mr. John compared Bachmann to Obama because of her opposition to raising the debt ceiling (which Obama also opposed, in A.D. 2006, when he was a senator).

Lest we forget, Bachmann is running for office again, in the name of Lightbulb Freedom, which means that the god of laughter is shining down on us, and so, do do not think of this as the beginning of the end, but merely the end of the beginning of the end. Bachmann would also like to remind you that no one else in Congress “in the history of the United States Congress” raised as much money as she did –$13.5 million — during her 2010 bid. She would also like to say that reports of her $1 million debt are “misleading,” which is not to say wrong, just not nice or patriotic at all. Also sexist. [City Pages]

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
Previous articleHandsome Old Joe Biden Yells at Fellow Olds
Next articleYouTube Does Not Care for Herman Cain’s Bunny Snuff Film