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Wow. This is a very acerbic Sarah Palin dressed up in a classic batshit old hag “leopard print muu-muu, beehive and spectacles” ensemble as she practically snarls at the retirement home folk who were bussed in to nap through her speech at Disneyworld. (And oh look, she’s standing behind a sign that is exactly one vowel away from a teabagger spelling of the word “ripoff.”) Anyway, Sarah Palin is here to explain between resentful sighs and pauses filled with bitterness that the problem with the Occupy Wall Street movement is, ready for it, that it is just too entitled.

From the transcript:

I looked at [Occupy Wall Street] and was thinking these folks, they feel legitimate indignation about the Wall Street bailouts, financial institutions behaving recklessly and then we get stuck with the bill. And then three years later, many of us are still quite ticked off because we don’t have assurances that those who caused the financial collapse in the first place, that they are being held accountable, and that it won’t happen again. But this Occupy Wall Street crowd — now it seems to have evolved a bit — Occupy Wall Street crowd is drawn now to, I believe, the wrong conclusions. They say, ‘Wall Street fat cats got a bail out, so now I want one too.’ And the correct answer is, ‘No one is entitled to a bailout.’

She actually hissed this last line. Our little sociopath queen is sounding so growed up! [Crooks and Liars]

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  • nounverb911

    Palin's still around? I thought they set her adrift on an ice floe.

    • datateday

      They tried to set her afloat on an ice floe but the seals, polar bears, and narwhales thought she was too annoying out there and sent her back. She landed somewhere in Alaska in which she befriended some Tundra Leopards and returned to civilized society in which she wears one of the Tundra Leopard's elder members in the clip we see today.

    • nanooknw

      Sarah, who???

  • nounverb911

    Looks like a maternity dress, is Bristol pregnant again?

    • I was thinking the same thing…

      Plus I was mesmerized by the height of her Bumpit.

    • MzNicky

      I wondered also. On the other hand, gotta admit, not many ex-VP candidates can pull off a leopard-print maternity dress.

      • Dimitrios_M

        Spiro Agnew surely back in the day.

      • Mahousu

        Somebody needs to tell Joe Lieberman that. It's getting kind of embarrassing.

        • AlterNewt

          Oh now don't sell ol' Joe short. He added the handbag and the clip-on pearl earrings. It's a pretty good look for him.

          • horsedreamer_1

            Really, tucking it is just enhanced circumcision. Nothing obscene about it.

          • Oh, so the leopardskin pillbox hat wasn't his idea?

      • neiltheblaze

        Lindsey Graham could pull it off. And might under the right circumstances.

    • DaSandman

      lol …GENIUS…

  • Barb

    She is not against entitlement. Alaska hands out the yearly welfare oil checks right on time, Sarah and her family get government run health care because Todd is an Eskimo, she has SarahPAC and her daughter is paid to pretend not to be having sex. What a dumb bitch.

    • Occupy V572

      Barb: money I get from the government is earned. Money you get the from the government is an undeserved entitlement. Try to understand this.

      • OhNoGuy

        Thanks for clearing that up. I was so worried there was something to Barb's comment.

        • Barb

          OhNoGuy, there is never something to Barb's comments, lol

          • HistoriCat

            That's Barb libel!

            Wait ..,.

          • Hey, don't you trash my friend … hey, Barb?

    • Tundra Grifter

      Barb:

      Actually, two checks a year. There's the royalty fund payments that have been around for years.

      And then there's the "windfall profits tax" oil companies pay – a new tax instituted by Duh Guv'Nor.

      Socialism, anyone?

    • Negropolis

      Doesn't it just make you mad? The rank hypocrisy; it burns. She is the queen of entitlements.

      • Barb

        Exactly Negropolis! Dang RNC had to buy this hillbilly family clothes. They had to buy Todd's underpants!

        • horsedreamer_1

          Silk drawers. Like going commando — in French.

    • Jukesgrrl

      I'd think I was a pretty SMART bitch if I could get money handed to me for doing next to nothing, as the Grifter-in-Chief and her family do.

      • Barrelhse

        Yeah, I was thinking "dismal cunt."

    • Gainsbourg69

      Needs moar I've got mine so fuck you.

  • Peggy? Peggy Bundy?

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Edith? Edith Prickley?

      (Whoops. Widestanceshakedown got there 12 minutes before me; below.)

      • Chichikovovich

        Damn! This board is relentless, unstoppable, like a wave of army ants. I step away from the keyboard for a few hours, come back, look at that picture of the teaparty Venus, and think: Well, hell, that's Andrea Martin playing Edith Prickley! But I know already that there is no point in thinking I can post something. Two hours lead time is like giving Usain Bolt a ten metre head start. And sure enough….

        • ChessieNefercat

          Yeah, I haz a sad. I can't get to any of the articles any more before there are already hundreds of comments, from the premier Wonketeers. So I go for quality reading instead of already-been-posted-by-someone-funnier commenting.

    • Jukesgrrl

      Brilliant!

    • Negropolis

      Al!

    • anniegetyerfun

      You take that back. Peggy Bundy was a class act compared to this rubber glove of duck jizz.

      • ChessieNefercat

        So true. Proof? Peggy was smarter (she never thought she was qualified to be President, so far as I know) and a better mother (neither Kelly nor Bud was ever knocked up/knocked up someone). And that family was actually close (goooo Bundys).

        But Bumpitbrain's outfit does make me wonder if she fell asleep to Married with Children/Flintstones re-runs.

        • horsedreamer_1

          True. But her best friend was a lesbian (whose merkin was a perpetually unemployed layabout).

          • TitsOccupado

            OMG!
            It all makes perfect sense to me now!

          • horsedreamer_1

            Let this meeting of NO MA'AM com to order!

      • snackypants

        Your turn of phrase in this comment makes my head spin, in a good way.

      • Uh … OKAY. Rubber glove of duck jizz. All righty, then.

      • tessiee

        "this rubber glove of duck jizz."

        It works on so many levels!

  • She's back to shopping at the Wasila Super Wal-Mart.

    • Occupy V572

      You haven't seen Wasilla….

      • neiltheblaze

        Wow! Who knew? One little hole in the wall pizza joint sells Latte! And there's a Yoga place – right across from the Krazy Moose Sub Shop! Their Krazy Moose Balls with pasta are always a favorite.

        Now I know why she spends so much time in the lower 48.

        • Generation[redacted]

          "Mocha Moose."

          DO NOT WANT

          • neiltheblaze

            Hey, for all I know it's one of the unsung jewels of the Yukon or wherever. I looked them up – they have great reviews.

            But the Latte at the pizza joint down the street is only a dollar. They probably make it with instant Maxwell House and Olvaltine, but it's only a dollar!

          • tessiee

            "the Latte at the pizza joint down the street is only a dollar. They probably make it with instant Maxwell House and Olvaltine, but it's only a dollar!"

            Considering that it's Alaska, where a toaster costs like six hundred dollars, the fact that something only costs a dollar is probably more of a warning than a recommendation.

          • tessiee

            ""Mocha Moose."

            DO NOT WANT"

            Although mocha mousse might be very nice.

      • TitsOccupado

        Almost as scenic as Trona, CA.

        • ShaveTheWhales

          It's remotely possible that Wasilla might smell better.

          • TitsOccupado

            You have been there, then. My condolences.

      • lulzmonger

        Whoa.
        "A-1 Pawn" in a town that small = COME ARMED OR STAY AWAY.

    • Jukesgrrl

      Do they take Disney Dollars?

  • Bible Spice, you certainly are correct. No one is entitled to a bailout. Even you.

    • iburl

      What is the difference between feeling "entitled to a bailout." and feeling entitled to quit your job and still get paid? And no, traveling around the country in a gaudy bus dressed like a reject from a Herb Alpert album cover, spouting idiocies, is not a job.

      • horsedreamer_1

        Hey, now. Herb played the trumpet. Sarah plays the butt trumpet. Totally different thing.

    • Negropolis

      Is there such a thing as "too stupid to fail?" 'Cause if there is, she's it.

    • oldmayfly

      your comment reminds me–on another site the other day someone referred to Ann Coulter as "Skeletal Spice"

  • e_z

    She looks and sounds sort of familar, didn't she used to be somebody?

    • Only in her UV irradiated mind.

    • Geminisunmars

      Nope, she never waz.

    • Generation[redacted]

      No.

    • Negropolis

      She used to think that she was somebody.

    • neiltheblaze

      She has always been a nobody.

    • BS4Dummies

      The mu mu looks familiar. Church Lady from SNL? Or was that the Wal Mart greeter I seen last week?

  • MaxNeanderthal

    Who the fuck's rattled her cage?

    • flamingpdog

      Broad belongs in a cage.

  • "Rick Scott is a doer. I know he's a doer because he's managed to tick off all the right people," she said to applause.

    A doer
    A deer
    A female deer
    Devil Rays…
    ~

    • Gainsbourg69

      Rick Scott has ticked off people because he's tried to privatize every fucking thing in this state. Other than that he's cool as shit.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Not quite all the right people — the Department of Justice still needs to be added to the list.

    • bikerlaureate

      I guess Casey Anthony is a doer too.

      • horsedreamer_1

        Sarah wishes Bristol had a little of that can-do spirit.

        … Too far?

    • Nostrildamus

      Rick Scott = Doer tick

    • tessiee

      "A doer
      A deer
      A female deer"

      D'oh!!

  • MissTaken

    And to think I was convinced the most annoying thing about Disneyworld was It's A Small World.

    • Schmannnity

      It's a small mind after all.

      • NorthStarSpanx

        Sarah would have benefited to knowing about the Small World, it could have made her even try at foreign knowledge if she had set her surveyor's marks so early on the White House before she was even elected Governor with 48% of the vote.

  • Schmannnity

    GTFO of Florida. We have enough trouble without importing it from the most heavily federal government subsidized state in the union. Go build a bridge to nowhere and take it.

    • Jukesgrrl

      I'd love to know how the audience of Florida olds would have reacted had she referred to Social Security and Medicare as "entitlements" they didn't deserve. Why didn't she hiss, "Get a job," to them?

      • She's a lot of things, including STUPID, but suicidal ain't one of them. Those old coots can *really* shake it when they're mad. And by "it," I mean one's carcase, preferably by the throat. With their teeth.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Go build a bridge halfway to nowhere and take it.

      Fixed.

  • Hey, didn't you used to be Sarah Palin?

    • neiltheblaze

      What? I thought it was Tina Fey.

  • rocktonsam

    did Trig FINALLY get to go see Micky Mouse?

    He lives with Goofy.

  • Boehneriffic

    Cunt

    • bikerlaureate

      T

  • Joshua Norton

    Relax and enjoy our big band sound as we ask the musical question "What the f*ck was THAT all about?"

  • widestanceshakedown
    • PhilippePetain

      Who's the stacked broad in the background?

      • Lascauxcaveman

        Proabably fellow SCTVer Katherine O'Hara.

        I don't remember her being so gosh darn chesticularly endowed.

        • PhilippePetain

          (AHERMPF!!!)

          I will FROM NOW ON HEY LAAAAAAAAYDIIIIIIIEEEEE

        • emmelemm

          Are you sure that's not a picture of Jennifer Coolidge? (your link)

        • That's Jennifer Coolidge, another one of the Christopher Guest posse.

          Catherine O'Hara: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thu

          • Lascauxcaveman

            My bad! That's what I get for google imaging the words "Katherine O'Hara" and then picking the one with the best cleavage.

            The scrunched-up crazy-smile led me astray, too. (But mostly the tits.)

          • Oh, Jennifer Cleavage! Now I get it.

        • Jesus Christ what the FUCK was THAT? Can it see out of those little eyeslits? Will it know that I popped a forehead vein at the sight?

  • meatlofer

    She has put on a few lbs. Better lay off the Rice ……Glenn Rice that is.

    • More like Uncle Ben's

      • Nostrildamus

        Glenn Rice -> Uncle Ben's -> Uncle Glans -> Glenn Rice

    • mannacler

      Glen likes the badonkadonk.

  • memzilla

    I feel entitled to not watch Muu-Muuselini.

    • OhNoGuy

      I got to 11 seconds, a personal best! (chest puffs out, almost beyond belly!!)

  • owhatever

    Go screw a basketball player, bitch.

  • fredbell

    The infinite-refill soda offer at Disneyworld has caused her to put on 20 pounds…Yikes…She's been carrying around her 40 oz. cup for three days now — continuously slurping for a crazy straw….

  • RPoof?

  • MissTaken

    That muu muu distracts from the lu jit a mit in dig naa shun spelled out on her palm.

  • PhilippePetain

    Aw fuck this shit she'll never die

    • Chichikovovich

      Travail, famille, patrie doesn't sound like such a great idea when she rabbits on about it, eh Phil?

    • Nostrildamus

      Today we are all Transylvanian peasants.

  • RadioOcupados

    I guess our half-term governor's reprieve is over. Back to the rack.

  • Callyson

    Looks like the white paint on the wall is peeling off. Even the building wants to get the hell away from Saint Sarah.

    • schvitzatura

      Patton flag American crumbling infrastructure…this represents freedom!

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      That screechy voice is something else, innit?

  • V572625694

    You can see now why the RNC was willing to drop $150K from their Fashion Emergency Fund at Nordstrom to tart her up for the McCain campaign. Sweet Jeebus, she chooses to dress like that?

    • Pithaughn

      At least she never had a $400 haircut, am I right?

    • Gainsbourg69

      In a room full of Florida olds she looks like Coco Chanel.

    • oldmayfly

      The good news is that no leopards were harmed in the making of that dress.

      • tihond

        On the other hand, it lets us know there's a Cougar on the prowl.

        • NorthStarSpanx

          If she had stayed a small pond politico, her monogrammed blue collar shirts and sportswear would have disguised Snowdrift Snookie's lack of style.

          The woman doesn't know how to add warmth and character to her home (unless Fox stage dresses her home set) and certainly doesn't know how to dress or accessorize unless its a Star of David, a rhinestone Jesus belt buckle or her Wonderwoman flag bracelet for her audience.

        • tessiee

          COUGAR LIBEL!!

  • neiltheblaze

    Can't we just put a wooden spike through her heart and make her go away in a cloud of ash?

    • Generation[redacted]

      If prolonged exposure to tanning beds doesn't work, nothing will.

    • Negropolis

      Like zombies and The South, Sarah Palin shall rise again!

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Probably the only way to get any brains into her.

  • flamingpdog

    Well, that was the world's shortest sabatshitical!
    Thanx for making me look good for once, Kirsten.

  • Callyson

    "we don’t have assurances that those who caused the financial collapse in the first place, that they are being held accountable, and that it won’t happen again."
    Thanks to *your* party's opposition to minimally effective reforms, no, we sure don't.
    Bitch.

    • HedonismBot

      No. Republicans ain't never got nowhere by fixing actual problems. They will make problems worse, if they think they can derive electoral benefit by doing so – because actually solving the problems (by ending wars, taxing the rich more, protecting the environment, etc) would for once and all expose the emptiness and hypocrisy of their political principles.

      • tessiee

        Not only do they have no interest in helping people, they're actively opposed to fixing problems. They want things to turn to shit, because they "think" that's proof that "government just doesn't work".

        • They're doing their best to ensure that government doesn't work. Which is why they should ALL be kicked out of public office. There was a time, once, when Republicans STOOD for something. Now they're all too busy sucking Koch to stand at all.

  • ThundercatHo

    Half the crowd is adjusting their hearing aids mistakenly thinking that the screeching sound is their devices going haywire.

  • chascates

    She's managed to hang around longer than the 'Where's the beef?' lady. But isn't as enjoyable.

    • MonsterAGoGo

      Along a similar vein, I find it funny to take all her transcripts and read them aloud as Larry "Bud" Melman. THANKS, PHONE DUDE!

    • Barrelhse

      At least Clara Peller had the good grace to die.

    • Negropolis

      Have you seen the new Wendy's commercial? The lady is still dead, but the campaign lives on.

  • PhilippePetain

    Well, dammit, I should have read the actual post before being a redundant dummy.

    • TitsOccupado

      This retraction of a former comment has been deleted by the universe.

  • memzilla

    RPOF = best acronym since CREEP.

    • RadioOcupados

      Stupidest acronym since Teabaggers. But at least they woke up and tried to change it when they realized what we were snickering at for a few months.

      • horsedreamer_1

        PUMA is stupider.

    • Barrelhse

      Republican Party Of France? Who knew.

    • Remember POOP?
      (I forget what it stood for, but there were hats!)

  • Tundra Grifter

    At this point, she's just going through the motions.

    – Todd Palin

    • rocktonsam

      Todd would know this for sure.

      • Tundra Grifter

        Even if he had to ask his business partner to find out.

  • Generation[redacted]

    Why does her podium say "RIPOFF?"

  • mavenmaven

    Just in time, after Herman Cain I was almost nostalgic for her. This certainly cured me of that.

  • MissTaken

    Remember kiddies: this is what the GOP consider "HOT"

    • comrad_darkness

      Meaning, "not choosy"?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Meaning "outdoors, in daylight, in Orlando".

  • As soon as she started speaking–if that sound like a ripsaw hitting a knot in a pine plank could be called speaking–most the elderly gents and ladies turned off their hearing aids.

    • tessiee

      Worst voice since the Fran Drescher/Gilbert Gottfried/Bobcat Goldthwait porno.

  • neiltheblaze

    Yes, Sarah is as fashionable as she is articulate

    • Barrelhse

      Now if she would be fashionably late, as in "the late Sarah Palin."

  • MissTaken

    I lost the office pool that Dippin Dots would outlast Sarah
    http://blog.sfgate.com/hottopics/2011/11/04/farew

    • Lascauxcaveman

      NOOOOOOOO! NOT DIPPIN' DOTS!!!!!!!

      (up til 2 minutes ago, i had never heard of Dippin' Dots.)

    • Tundra Grifter

      Best movie snack ever! The theaters around here peddle horrible popcorn. How fucking hard is it to cook POPCORN!?

      Buy a good brand.

      Heat it up. (I.e., pop it.)

      Put butter on it.

      Serve it.

      Apparently in Northern California it's about as tough as splitting the atom.

    • neiltheblaze

      They only managed to lose $12 million?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        Jon Corzine was busy elsewhere.

  • Wonderthing

    She is one book tour away from kneeling in a back alley for crack.

  • Veritas78

    When did it turn Cuntober?

    • emmelemm

      Well, we are turning our clocks back this weekend…

    • RadioOcupados

      Half-term quitter Govember?

    • More like,

      no.No.NO!.NONONO!!!MAKEITSTOP!MAKEITSTOP!MAKEITSTOP!!!!!
      …vember.

      I can't even read what this bitch says without getting a headache much less listen to it.

    • Barrelhse

      It seems like Novulva.

    • Negropolis

      There are not enough months in a year. Leave it to Hallmark to invent a new one. We went stright from October to Cuntober, and it won't be until we've finish Blowvember that we reach November.

  • Negropolis

    Bitch, please. Your entire Tea Party movement is based on self-entitled olds who feel entitled to every government program this side of the Civil War, and entitled to discriminate against people not like them.

    Fuck off, you old washed-up, two-bit grifter-rat. Mean-spirited as ever, I see. Bless her heart.

    • Katydid

      OT, but I was wondering today, why do the olds drive so damn slow? You'd think they'd be in a hurry all the time, what with being about to die and all.

      • Negropolis

        It's not that they drive so slow, it's everyone else that drives so damned fast, these day, or at least that what my grandma tells me. You know, those damned kids and their 8-track players, and Atari games, and disco, and their convertible Ford Mustangs and whatnot.

  • JackDempsey1

    "And oh look, she’s standing behind a sign that is exactly one vowel away from a teabagger spelling of the word “ripoff.”"

    And she's standing *in front of* a 2-story package wrapped with a red bow.
    Betcha it's a herd of carribou and a machine gun.

    • Gainsbourg69

      Hove-around subsidies FTW!

  • BklynIlluminati

    I thought she was already in hibernation what happened? Which one of you woke her??? BASTARDS ALL OF YOU!

    • fuflans

      well i don't know about that, but she's certainly started storing the calories…

    • rocktonsam

      monies woke her
      I doubt $he ever sleeps

    • That coulda been me. It's not MY fault there's nothing but bean stew in the fridge, ferchrisakes.

  • Come here a minute

    Your governor is very impressive. He's a bit of an illustration of still waters running deep.

    Just don't ask him where Clearwater is.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Come here a minute and Kissimmee.

    • Gainsbourg69

      Clearwater is where I was called a spic for the first time. No joke.

      • Uh … what? Like, just out of the blue? Is it Aryantown, and you were the only dark-haired individual, or what?

    • Negropolis

      Clearwater is where the Sharia'd city of Dearborn use to own an apartment building for its residents up well into the 2000's.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      More like "stagnant waters still reek."

    • tessiee

      Is that the right-to-life town that Domino's Pizza owns?

  • YouBetcha

    Awwwwwww, is our little Snowbilly Princess feeling neglected? Quick, someone send Greta to pay her some much-needed attention.

  • BigDumbRedDog

    She better watch out wearing that in Alaska. Some overzealous hunter is going to mistake her for a leopard seal or something.

    • rocktonsam

      or an overzealous randy seal.
      was that Todd's porn name also?

    • And you're telling us this because? Oh, wait. You're not planning a HUNTING trip to AK soon and laying down a cover story or nuthin', are ya?

      • tessiee

        "You're not planning a HUNTING trip to AK soon and laying down a cover story or nuthin"

        Certainly not!
        It's a SURVEYING trip!

        • Yeah, well, the last time one a THOSE happened, a pretty blonde lady ended up in hospital and a whole bunch of other nice people bought the farm with all the little furry animals on it. So don't think I'm not keeping a surveyorly eye on you, tessiee. Because I … oh, wait, it's Palin.

          Carry on.

  • mercianomad

    I would love to bombard her with various gotcha questions across multiple categories for an hour and then make the results public.

    • Tundra Grifter

      What would you do with the last 55 minutes?

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Katie Couric's been there and done that. Palin can spew mindless word salad forever; her supporters marks just slurp up the teabagger code words without trying to parse any of it.

      • I didn't realize, Biely, that it was actually possible to parse the bullshit she spews so regularly.

        • Biel_ze_Bubba

          You can often spot nouns and verbs in order, and then filter out the spontaneously-generated-in-the-brainstem gibberish, to arrive at whatever thought she might actually have in her head. For example: "Paul Revere [random bits of imagined history] warn the British [random 2nd amendment babble]." Her teabagging marks focus on the bracketed crap.

          • I can't listen to more than two words of her screeching. It's the voice, I think. It feels like fingernails scraping the skin right off my soul.

    • I would love to bombard herwith various gotcha questions across multiple categories for an hour and then make the results public.

      FIFY, NNTT

    • tessiee

      Her idea of a "gotcha question" is anything other than, "Why are you so awesome?".

  • Walkinwiddaking

    i think the correct answer is the Greedheads who caused this fiasco should be held accountable.

    • flamingpdog

      Greedheads caused Sarah Palin?

      • TitsOccupado

        They created her from whole cloth.

      • Walkinwiddaking

        Sarah Palin caused this latest or for that matter, the 2008 economic collapse? I'm sorry, I haven't been watching Fox news lately so….

  • PubOption

    Did she claim that the Occupy Wall Street protests have been going on for three years?

    • Years, weeks… you socialists and your damn addiction to facts!

    • That's what I thought I heard. Is she insane?

  • comrad_darkness

    Sarah Palin says: "Stand aside, people, and let Wall Street finish stealing the retirement funds of our dear guests here at this dinner."

  • Nice leopard-print Snuggie.

    • neiltheblaze

      The Shamu Mu Mu.

      • snackypants

        Sham-wow!

    • TitsOccupado

      Why doesn't leopard rhyme with leotard?

      • It used to. Oncet.

      • tessiee

        "Why doesn't leopard rhyme with leotard?"

        You know what *does* rhyme with "leotard"?
        Trig.

  • BarackMyWorld

    What do Sarah Palin, Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, Herman Cain, Rick Perry, George W. Bush, Mitt Romney, and Barack Obama all have in common?

    They all supported the TARP bail-out in 2008.

    • Lascauxcaveman

      But most of them were against it before they were for it before they were against it.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      How many of 'em support the tarp camp-out in 2011?

  • Beowoof

    Too irrelevant: Didn't Watch

  • Soylent Green

    Bailout?! I don't want a bailout. I was robbed and I simply want it back.

  • Schmannnity

    I look forward to Monday's Fox 'n Friends when they denounce this filth for leaving her special needs child at home to go off on some personal crusade.

    • Does doing a half-assed job to collect an out-sized speaking fee qualify as a personal crusade? If so, where do I sign up to be a Crusader?

    • I'm still trying to figure out why the fuck she bothered having that poor kid. She hasn't spent a day with that child out of the public eye, as far as I can tell. Either she's dragging the poor kid around, insufficiently dressed for the weather in public, as if his poor weak heart and delicate immune system aren't stressed enough by the mere fact of being *alive* — jezus, I don't have words for how angry this makes me. Children don't ask to be born. They're usually conceived by people who aren't thinking of them so much at the time as thinking of getting their fucking rocks off. Which is why, once the poor wee mites get here, those responsible for *making* them should be making them their first thought and care. It's by OUR choice, not THEIRS, that they must suffer this world. Let's at least try to be halfway decent human beings and CARE for them and love them.

      Fuck, snakes show more concern for their little ones than this wretched, stupid cunt.

      • tessiee

        "She hasn't spent a day with that child out of the public eye, as far as I can tell. Either she's dragging the poor kid around, insufficiently dressed for the weather in public, as if his poor weak heart and delicate immune system aren't stressed enough by the mere fact of being *alive*"

        $arah thought all that traveling around she did while she was in labor was going to solve her little problem, but I guess the kid's turning out to be harder to get rid of than she expected.

        "Children don't ask to be born. They're usually conceived by people who aren't thinking of them so much at the time as thinking of getting their fucking rocks off."

        It's one of life's little ironies that the people most likely to become parents are those who are too lazy or too irresponsible to use birth control — i.e., the people who are least suited to being parents.

        • It makes me furious. Every fucking child abuse or neglect story. And it's even worse when the kid is disabled, because those are the most helpless of the helpless and it's unconscionable that people find it in their hearts to treat them as they do. Palin is representative of that. That child is disabled, in order to live a halfway decent life, it needs to be sheltered until its immune system is strong enough to cope. It needs lots of quiet time and love in order to grow and develop with any hope of a good life. I wouldn't treat a fucking possum the way she treats that kid.

          Ah, I'm ranting like a loon. Good thing nobody made ME god, huh? I'd already have wiped out half the planetary population.

  • emmelemm

    I really hope a Sarah Palin post isn't going to be the last thing we see all weekend.

    {sob}

  • Rotundo_

    Peg Bundy without the intellect, good looks and taste. The real Dame $arah for all the world to ignore! RPOF must really be scraping bottom if they're booking the grifter queen for one of these rubber chicken fiestas. Couldn't they get Kelsey Grammer or some other conservatard has-been actor?

  • Jebus I hate her

  • iburl

    Once again, Fuck You McCain for doing this to us.

  • HobbesEvilTwin

    grifter cunt is grifty (and cunty), also, too.

  • fuflans

    muu-muu libel!

  • Katydid

    Damn, I had forgotten she was alive. Sorry, no snark, even her name reminds me of bad times, and makes me cranky. I don't hate her anymore; I just don't ever want to read her name or look at a picture of her and her hillbilly griftin' clan again. As Paul Simon said, "I don't find this stuff amusing anymore."

  • El Pinche

    You know what would make this "speech" better? A big ass basketball player's vein packed cock in her mouth. "Nmff Onfff Isnff Entifftilttfff tofff afff baffillff outfff. Allsofff"

    • horsedreamer_1

      Oh, you think that strumpet Palin deserves so good? Just wait 'til Jackie Christie throws down over that kind of insipidity.

    • Er … with, or without, said player attached?

      Because, not to be difficult, or nothing, but, you know, I mean, just ew.

  • ibwilliamsi

    "They say, ‘Wall Street fat cats got a bail out, so now I want one too.’ "

    I have NEVER heard anyone say that. I HAVE heard "I haven't made up my mind whether or not I should run for President, please send me more money to help me decide."

    Bitch. And that's putting what I think of her nicely.

    • No, what the Indignados say is, "Wall St. got bailed out, we got SOLD out." That's what they say. They think that those responsible for the financial crisis should be held accountable, with jail terms and fines. And that there should be regulation to ensure this kind of stuff does not happen again, and the banks should NEVER be bailed out again. I haven't heard anything different, or not too different, anyway.

  • Only partially off-topic.
    From an Associate Press article about a new book by Mark Kelly and Gabrielle Giffords to be published this month:
    "The book also mentions Sarah Palin, who was criticized after the shootings for a map posted by her political action committee that showed a number of Democratic-held congressional districts marked with crosshairs. Giffords' district was among those covered by the tiny symbols, which were supposed to indicate seats that would be targeted by the Republicans.

    Giffords found the map disturbing. After the shootings, Kelly vented his feelings about the map to President Barack Obama. He thought Palin might call to offer condolences because of the mounting criticism, but she never did.

    Representatives for Palin's political action committee, SarahPAC, did not immediately respond to messages seeking comment."

    • Negropolis

      You know, Mark Kelly is a good guy, but he wasn't seriously awaiting an apology from the Sarah Palin, was he? Hell would sooner freeze over than Griftress apologize for anything, ever.

      • I think what he was waiting for was simply a chance to embarrass her. And if everyone reports this story the way AP did, he might have found it.

      • horsedreamer_1

        He's an astronaut. He literally has his head in the clouds.

        (I see this as the brother of a rocket scientist. Terribly smart guy, but not always the most pop-culturally aware.)

        • He sounds like a decent human being, which means, of course, that he has no clue how the SnowBillyGrifter's mind (or what passes therefor) works.

  • fuflans

    also: it looks like disneyland needs a bail-out. that or they put her in the 'critter country'.

  • Redhead

    So only the Palin family is entitled to bailouts? Why is this woman giving speeches anyway? Aren't there some jumbo bags of cheetohs from the costco that need eating?

  • Blueb4sunrise

    Are we sure that there were really other people in the room?

  • Tommmcattt

    Nobody deserves a handout? You sure about that, Sarah-Plain-And-Dumb?

    From a 2008 article on Alaska tax policy vis-a-vis oil companies:

    Some of that new cash will end up in the wallets of Alaska's residents.

    Palin's administration last week gained legislative approval for a special $1,200 payment to every Alaskan to help cope with gas prices, which are among the highest in the country.

    That check will come on top of the annual dividend of about $2,000 that each resident could receive this year from an oil-wealth savings account.

    Fucking hypocritical cunt. Hideous taste as well, by the way. My dog could pick out better separates.

    Full article here:
    http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2

    • real_dc_native

      It's fair compensation for having to live in the same state as the Sarah monster.

  • BarackMyWorld

    "…they feel legitimate indignation about the Wall Street bailouts, financial institutions behaving recklessly and then we get stuck with the bill."

    I thought the preferred conservative talking point was that it wasn't the banks fault because they were FORCED by the government to loan money to people who couldn't pay it back, and the high-risk derivative trading was actually good because JOB CREATORS FREE MARKETS LESS GOVERNMENT TAX CUTS TAX CUTS TAX CUTS!!!

    • RadioOcupados

      Pssst, BMW, Sarah's a little slow on the uptake if you know what I mean. You might even say she's re†arded.

  • Antispandex

    She sounds so stupid that you are tempted to think she just doesn't get it. The problem is, she does.

  • chascates

    Sarah is against bailouts but loves those handouts, speaking fees, endorsements, etc. As to mentioning how 'work ethic' made America great how does a serial quitter know anything about that?

    • I think she'd tell you it's only semantics. If she knew that word.

      • ChessieNefercat

        "If she knew that word."

        Oh, she does.
        See man ticks! (crabs?)
        Semen ticks! (ouch?)
        Some antics (what she's up to all the time)

  • real_dc_native

    You can never find a predator drone around when you need one.

    • iburl

      You can find a drone coming from somebody dressed as a predator, though.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      The leopard-print camo must be fooling you.

      As any wolf can tell you, Sarah is a predator. And if the wolf is half-way intelligent, he'll tell you she's a drone as well.

  • GeorgiaBurning

    I'm expecting the hotel gift shop will need to be restocked, what's the over/under on the bill for all the Mickey Mouse gear she charges to her room?

  • "The sheriff is a ni—!"

    • ttommyunger

      "near"

  • TitsOccupado

    Voice like a fucking dolphin whisperer singing a duet with a ripsaw.

    • Tundra Grifter

      TO: That's some funny stuff right there!

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Peeled the paint right off the wall behind her.

  • x111e7thst

    How soon till she wears out her welcome everywhere else and is reduced to playing the Beach Haven Moose Lodge?

    • horsedreamer_1

      If they were still around, I would say Palin could open for the Frogs.

  • Tundra Grifter

    Kirsten:

    Of course she's yelling at the Olds! Otherwise they couldn't hear her.

  • Negropolis

    Look at her all gussied up and using big girl words. Isn't she just precious? You know, the White Precious, Kathy Griffin once refered to Bristol as, I hear?

  • Limeylizzie

    Ocelot-festooned cunt.

  • iburl

    Ugly-Ass-Muu-Muu-vember

  • OutsideAgitator

    So it's live from Dismal World with her Royal Dimness. That sure was a Grisly World of a speech she gave. But there is a tragic kingdom connection for Tawd – he might actually be fuckin' Goofy every once in a blue moon. Damn you Walt, wherever you are!

  • SayItWithWookies

    That dog on the porch sure barks a lot.

  • anniegetyerfun

    Those aren't leopard spots. They're starburst stains.

  • iburl

    Who else can combine the sense of style of a Bill Gates with the intellectual depth of a Dan Quayle and share an eerie historical similarity to Vlad the Impaler…

    "Vlad Ţepeş, Vlad III of Romania (also known as Vlad the Impaler) was Prince of Wallachia three times between 1448 and 1476."

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      He quit, twice?

  • Toomush_Infer

    I'm sorry – my old computer doesn't have HD – does that shadow on her forehead really say: "Best Used by 2008"?…

    • ChessieNefercat

      I think her best was probably about 1968.

  • GlowneyHouse

    csp/dw

    (Contained Sarah Palin/ Didn't Watch.)

  • Terry

    Oh, y'all missed the best part. Snowbilly thinks Rick Scott is deep:

    "Rick Scott is a doer. I know he's a doer because he's managed to tick off all the right people," she declared, according to The Associated Press.

    "Your governor is very impressive. He's a bit of an illustration of still waters running deep — unassuming, humble, an amazing life story, a life story that really is the picture of what someone can accomplish in America with work ethic and commitment."

    • … and no sense of right and wrong." FIXED.

    • ChessieNefercat

      Was she talking about the Medicare fraud convictions? Because I understand that she would get all starry-eyed over that, but geez, you stupid cunt, no need to be so blatant about it.

  • HistoriCat

    OK, I'm not going to mention any names here but someone in an earlier post today mentioned that it had been two weeks since Wonkette had a Sarah Palin story. You should have known that kind bragging was going to come back and bite us.

    • Quick, tell me who it is, so I can strangle them. Before they invoke her name again and afflict us with her like a veritable POX.

  • ttommyunger

    Jeez, she is falling apart at the seams….I don't even want to hate-fuck her anymore.

    • Dood, she must be beyond dead then, because you'd pretty much hate-fuck anybody. Right?

      • ttommyunger

        …………I'm thinking………..

        • S. L. U. T.

          But you knew that. Gotta stop reading Wonketz when the cats are sleeping. I LOL'd and scared them off the bed again. Poor li'l bastids are starting to look nervous whenever the laptop comes out.

  • OccupyFnChicken

    So when is she going to hook up "Jersey Shore" style to Joe the Plumber?

    Actually, I bet he hit it a time or two when they were tag-teaming the goddamn teabag circuit

    • She made him think it would happen, then she closed the Motel 6 door in his face.

    • ThundercatHo

      Oh, please, no. You just reminded me that JTP is running for the repug nomination in my congressional district. If he gets it he'll be up against Marcy Kaptur so nothing to worry about except it could bring the Snowbilly Grifter within 500 miles if she decides to campaign for him.

      • Word to the wise: That worked SO FUCKING WELL when she went to CallyforNEEYuh to campaign for SMegma Witless and Cara Carleton Sneed. Why, just the other day, Governor Witless … what? You say she didn't win it?

        All righty, then.

    • horsedreamer_1

      The Chez Palin smush room doubles as the University of Alaska-Anchorage Bacterial Sciences Field Study.

  • Neoyorquino

    I hadn't had the misfortune of hearing about her in awhile. I was kind of hoping she'd been eaten by bears.

    • ChessieNefercat

      Poor bears.

    • iburl

      She heard bears won't eat ocelots.

    • That's a cruel fate to wish on a bear wot 'as never 'armed yew.

  • SudsMcKenzie

    …. like a swallow returning to Capistrano.

  • ThundercatHo

    OT: Did anybody hear that 12 members of congress took "The Food Stamp Challenge" to feed themselves on $4.50 day/$31 week? This gesture was apparently to bring attention to the fact that the "super" committee is considering cutting SNAP funding.

    • It all started with the lovely and steel-willed Jackie Speier of California, a progressive who is acutely aware of the challenges facing the working poor, especially poor women with children.

  • An_Outhouse

    I hope Herman Cain is paying attention. I don't know if Herman would have gotten himself into this if he knew he would have to wear a mumu in a few months.

  • Hey you remember in 2008 when the Bush Administration bailed out the banks? Neither Does Sarah Palin.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Fuck … I get all the way to Saturday without Her Griftiness intruding into my consciousness, and now I find this steaming heap of political performance crap dumped on my mental front yard.
    Is there a nationwide petition that I can sign, demanding that this stupid annoying bitch just shut the fuck up and disappear?

  • littlebigdaddy

    Roseanne Barr has lost a little weight.

  • horsedreamer_1

    Yellow Ledbetter is more intelligible than this.

    • tihond

      Even Blind Lemon Jefferson thinks her outfit is a bit too much.

  • ChessieNefercat

    Was she wearing her leopard-print hooker shoes with this fetching ensemble? http://tinyurl.com/423babm

  • Toomush_Infer

    Okay, I know what it is (been unable not to think about it since yesterday): Where's the f'in Leopard Skin Pillbox Hat????…

    • Hey! I said that! So WHAT if I said it a day late?

    • tessiee

      "Where's the f'in Leopard Skin Pillbox Hat????"

      In Bob Dylan's wardrobe.

  • JackObin

    Yes, may I have Thousand Island dressing on my word salad?

    • tessiee

      "may I have Thousand Island dressing on my word salad?"

      If only $arah had ordered the caesarian salad.

  • !!!TELEPROMPTERZ!!!

  • Isyaignert

    Glad you posted a transcript because I flat out refuse to listen to that shrew's screetchy, scarcastic voice. She is the most ridiculous person in the GOTP since Herman Squirming Cain, and Michelle Batshit Crazy Bachmann, Naughty Gnewt Gingrich, Hang 'em High Perry, and Which Way Is the Wind Blowing Romney.

  • FlyOverGirl

    Make. It. Stop.

  • rubyslippers

    What's the difference between Sarah Palin and Goofy's wife?
    Nothing, they're both fucking goofy.

  • rocktonsam

    Mrs. Palin,

    Runners World Magazine on line one.

  • jus_wonderin

    When she get a hole in her rowboat, I will give her….the finger.

  • nellpost

    Seriously, that is one ugly outfit.

  • Darklady

    Does she give that speech to Trig when they cash his SSD checks? How about when any of her kids and Todd go in for their subsidized government medical care? Or when she hangs out with her political friends who get paid their taxpayer salaries for their entire lives?

    Given how many times she's squacked this same line of bullshit, you'd think she wouldn't need to pause, double check her notes, stumble over her own tongue, and whatever else she needs to do to remind herself of what nasty lies to spew next for more money than she's worth.

  • tessiee

    "Sarah Palin dressed up in a classic batshit old hag “leopard print muu-muu, beehive and spectacles” ensemble"

    As a batshit old fart, I must formally protest this portrayal as being "classic", or in any way typical. I *never* wear a leopard print muu-muu, but only ever wear leopard print lingerie.

  • tessiee

    "these folks, they feel legitimate indignation about the Wall Street bailouts, financial institutions behaving recklessly and then we get stuck with the bill. And then three years later, many of us are still quite ticked off because we don’t have assurances that those who caused the financial collapse in the first place, that they are being held accountable, and that it won’t happen again."

    This can't be a correct transcript. It's too grammatically coherent, makes too much sense, and shows too much compassion.

  • tessiee

    I have a strong religious or moral conviction that somebody ought to kick the crap out of Silly Sarah.

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