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Pizza pizza!Delusional vanity candidate Herman Cain is still successfully duping his excitable mouth-breather viewers watching at home into believing that he is at least half-interested in running an actual presidential campaign instead of just siphoning money from the donations to buy up his terrible books, but apparently his staffers are starting to grow wise to the scheme. Their biggest “clue” seems to be that he is an aloof rich guy who is constantly screwing everything up — from his weird videos to names of countries to simple policy questions — just as surely as he shows zero interest in fixing any of it. Because hey, if his style was good enough for shitty pizza, it’s good enough for a presidential campaign! 

The NYTimes has a fun report full of cantankerous interviews with former staffers complaining about how he is a terrible manager who never bothers to communicate with his staff or whatever — basically everything everyone hated about proven grifter Sarah Palin in 2008 minus the $150,000 Nieman Marcus shopping receipt, because he’s already rich. AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT.

From the article:

And then there was that e-mail to the staff about traveling in a car with Mr. Cain: “Do not speak to him unless you are spoken to,” the memo said.

“I found it odd,” said a former staff member who liked to prep Mr. Cain for appearances while driving. The aide, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, quit not long afterward, citing the e-mail as one of the deciding factors.

Herman Cain and his piles of pizza money are too fancy for all of you losers!

Setting up offices was also something of a trial. “When I told people, ‘You’ll be getting offices and phone lines,’ I’d have to postpone that,” the former staff member in Iowa said. “It was like they were running for sophomore class president.”

Mr. Hall added, “We couldn’t even get our own e-mail addresses,” for the campaign.

And on and on and on and on. There are dozens of these quotes in the story. But who’s got time for offices and phone lines when your fifteen minutes are about to be up? [NYT]

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