the eagle soars no more.Here is your “new” 1996 Herman Cain gospel album that managed to hide from the Internets up until now, and no surprises on this one really, it’s 100% crappy synthesizer tracks that remind us of when the Internet was just a bunch of Midi files floating around on GeoCities pages. Cain’s vocals also include some backup singing we are not sure is human… screaming eagles? Actually none of this album is as weird as this roadkill eagle logo we found on his website while we were looking this up. Pizza fans the “Cainiacs” freed this monstrosity onto the Internet, so blame them and not Herman Cain, who at least we can say would beat John Ashcroft in a singing competition.

Our quick capsule review gives this album a pretty solid “meh” next to hits like Orrin Hatch singing gay love songs for Ted Kennedy and immortal John Ashcroft ballad “Let the Eagle Soar,” which clinically counts as mind rape.

From CNN:

His album, “Sunday Morning,” was recently released on the Internet, courtesy of Draft Cain, an independent group not affiliated with the campaign. According to Cain’s campaign, the CD was originally released in 1996 by GLC Music, Selah Sound Production and Melodic Praise Records.

The 13-track gospel record was posted by Maurice Atkinson, the head of Draft Cain. It includes religious tracks like “Lord’s Prayer,” “I Must Tell Jesus,” “Hallelujah Square” and “Precious Lord.”

The former Godfather’s Pizza CEO and radio host is no stranger to the stage and is sometimes heard singing on the campaign trail.

So here are some lyrics from “Hallelujah Square.” In this dramatic piece, Herman Cain makes zero mention of Eagles, Freedom, Tears, Fetuses or Eagles, so uh, Rick Santorum, get on that.

I saw a blind man passing along
Pushing his way
As he passed through the throng
Tears filled my eyes
I said, “Sir, you can’t see”
With a smile on his face
He replied to me
I’ll see all my friends in Hallelujah Square
What a wonderful time
We’ll all have a fair
We’ll sing and praise Jesus
His glory to share
And you’ll not see one blind man
In Hallelujah Square.

We don’t think Jesus will ban blind people from heaven, but whatever, Herman Cain, that’s your call. [CNN]

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