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All three branches of the Wisconsin government.The Koch Brothers’ dumb little whore from Wisconsin, Scott Walker, is testifying before Congress today — and he’s got a very unique take on the class war he’s waging against the working citizens of his state. “In Wisconsin, we are doing something truly progressive. In addition to holding the line on spending and finding efficiencies in state government, we are implementing long term budget reforms focused on protecting middle class jobs and middle class taxpayers.” Uh, yeah! By screwing people out of the minimal protections unions provide for some public-sector workers, Scott Walker is actually protecting the middle class he and his corporate backers are intentionally destroying. Progressive!

As Walker will be reading this statement to actual convicted street criminal and right-wing sociopathic hack Darrell Issa — who is now, hilariously, “chairman of the Committee on Oversight and Government Reform” — you can expect Issa to start crying while masturbating under his desk, into an easy-kleen puppet of a poor child’s mouth.

Anyway, Scott Walker is in Washington, everybody! Go say hello and push him down a broken Metro escalator, to forward Progressive Values! [TIME]

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