The eighth and ninth Republican traitor-senators have been revealed! Lamar Alexander and Bob Corker now say they’ll back the START nuclear treaty with the Soviet Union, and which requires the United States of America to have a few less nuclear death missiles, which will make it super easy for the Rooskies to drop the A-bomb and cause Communism. Stalin must be laughing it up today!

Republican defense secretary Robert Gates, who was appointed by George W. Bush and still runs things as if Bush/Cheney were still running things (which we guess they still are?), begged some more Republicans to please join him in supporting the treaty so that the “Great Bear” can parachute the Red Army onto our public school playgrounds and rape our white children with Lenin-Marx. [Washington Post]

Donate with CCDonate with CC
  • Come here a minute

    We'll meet again
    Don't know where
    Don't know when
    But we'll meet again some sunny day

    • BeWoot

      Yankee Dog Tango to base: YeeeHaw!

      • XOhioan

        Slim Pickens showed us the way.

  • WuuuulVERIES!!!!!!!!


    Wuu… what?

    What do you mean that Red Dawn made no sense? US Naval domination in the Cold War, lousy Soviet logistics, why the fuck would the Sovs invade Dumbfuckistan?, lack of any meaningful Sov airlift capabilities, and dumbshit writing… Oh right.

    • SmutBoffin

      Makes you miss Reagan's America, doesn't it? When Hollywood wasn't 'liberal' at all (also cf. Rocky IV).

    • SmutBoffin

      What do you mean that Red Dawn made no sense?

      That was life in Reagan's America: dumb and wrong and with a crappy soundtrack.

      • Kidneys4Sale


    • V572625694

      "Some people say there's a bear in the woods." We thought this commercial was about the Soviet Union, when it was actually about Alaskunt Mama Grizzly, who was still in her third of five colleges. Republicans know this stuff. Don't argue with them; it's not about reason.

      • bumfug

        Does this treaty keep the dingleberries off the bear's ass like Charmin does?

        • Does the pope shit in the woods?

          • LionelHutzEsq

            Only when directed to by the Fuhrer, or when little boys are around.

    • The chair is against the wall.

      John has a long mustache.

  • SayItWithWookies

    You know who else signed a non-aggression deal with the Russians?

    • ShaveTheWhales

      Ahhhh, Realpolitik.

    • Negropolis

      Santa? I hear he's signed pacts with every nation within the Artic Circle.

  • MuslinMosk

    Given Alaska's proximity to Russia, this must be how moderate/less-retarded Republicans plan to deal with the Sarah Palin problem.

    • yet i find this scary, considering russia's proximity to russia. you're probably right though.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Hmmm. The only reason I can think of that these two Tennessee Republicans would sign on is that they wheedled out a promise that the Rooskies wouldn't nuke the shit out of Oak Ridge.

    • hagajim

      Or there is additional monies going to Oak Ridge…but either way. As long as I don't have to listen to John Kyl ever again I don't care.

      • V572625694

        He's hateful, but do does he give you the same gag reflex McConnell does? Kyl's like an excessively familiar undertaker. McConnell's more of a cough-syrup crazed druggist.

        • Negropolis

          Kyl has really upped the crazy ante, lately. I guess John McCain wasn't being vile enough, right? Seriously, those two couldn't retire soon enough, with the only qualifer being that I'm sure whoever is waiting in the wings for both will be equally vile and will have youth, which may make their replacement even more vile.

    • tribbzthesquidz

      Hope they make Oak Ridge promise not to blow up Oak Ridge. Also.

    • transfatz

      What would Basil Marceaux do?

  • SmutBoffin

    The fact that Barack Obama negotiated with somebody is a sign of weakness and muslinity.

    • LetUsBray

      And moral weakness, also too.

    • transfatz

      I like it!

    • horsedreamer_1

      Exactly. Where's his solidarity with his Mohammedan brothers in Chechnya?

  • mavenmaven

    The Republicans have discovered that Russian women are hot due to internet porn, and so are in favor of better relations. As long as they hate the Islams.

    • HistoriCat

      It's an interesting theory but it hangs up on one point: Republicans/women … just sayin'.

    • XOhioan

      In case of nuclear attack, the Senators will need women with sexual characteristics of a highly stimulating nature.

    • arihaya

      you certainly never saw Tatar girls (Russian citizens and Muslims and hots)

  • but with less nukes, how are we supposed to keep getting boners?

  • Serolf_Divad

    START? Oh, you mean the Satanic Treasonous Antiamerican Reversediscrimination Treaty?

    I weep red, white and blue tears for America today… what's left of her.

    • Monsieur_Grumpe

      Does Glen Bleck use writers? You could sell that short and wonderfully psychotic rant to him for millions of gold colored coins.

      • Serolf_Divad

        Why are all my Goldline coins filled with chocolate?

  • gullywompr

    Best. Lame. Duck. Ever.

  • CapeClod

    It is always wrong to negotiate a nuke treaty with a country lead by a bare chested Fats Domino impersonator.

  • LionelHutzEsq

    I don't see what the Republicans are so afraid of, after all, John Boehner has proved that you can live perfectly well, even after absorbing enough radiation to turn your skin orange.

  • When it comes to the main things presidents do, he IS president.

  • ttommyunger

    Don't know what the fuss is about. Terrorists are the only ones even vaguely interested in using nuclear weapons and they are not signatories to any Treaty, real or proposed. Russia and the US are not interested in mutual destruction, plus, nuclear war does not feed the beast (Military-Industrial Complex).

  • transfatz

    Why would Russia bother with nukes at all when you can just lob a bunch of low margin short sell orders into a fiber optic cable and accomplish the same thing?

  • fuflans

    i can't think about any of this. does anyone have a ham biscuit?

  • arihaya

    on another note: current Russian administration (Putin and Medvedev) didn't really like Stalin, since Stalin was Georgian and lately Georgia has been very naughty to Russia (launching rockets, marching tanks and stuffs like that)

  • ShaveTheWhales

    I for one am thrilled that we may finally ratify a treaty that means that we will only have enough nuclear weaponry to kill every mammal on the planet three times as opposed to ten times.

    Or whatever.

    Fuck it, how no-brains does something have to be before the no-brains on the R side of the aisle will put the good of the country — and of the whole fucking species — above their political assgrabbery?

  • Negropolis

    This is just following the Republicans view that one can never have too many enemies. They'd love to start up the Cold War, again, especially if it forces Obama into trying to put out another fire they've started, little pyro imps that they are.

    BTW, I will never forgive the likes of Corker and Shelby for their completely disgusting grandstanding during the auto bailout. Shamelessly shilling for Toyota. How's that working out for you guys, lately?

Previous articleLoathsome Southern Dandy Lindsey Graham About To Be Outed?
Next articleCensus Allocates 6 More Crazy Members of Congress To Florida, Texas