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UnrelatedGood Friday-time, colonies! England, Land of Kings, would like to participate in what shallst now be titled, Thine Gloubal Tea Party Ninny Knickers Movement. The British Tea Party component shallst launch its first Proutestation this Saturday, and shallst be led by Sir Telegraph Writer Human Daniel Hannan, a “British fiscal conservative.” Actual tea shallst be there, unless certain Bostonian riff-raffs, wooled in uncouth Savage Knickers, destroy their tea again.

Mister Hannan The Leader explains:

Labour has raised more than a trillion pounds in additional taxation since 1997. Yet, unbelievably, Gordon Brown has still managed to run up a deficit of 12.6 per cent of GDP (Greece’s is 12.7 per cent). A far lower level of taxation brought Americans out in spontaneous protest last year.

Hmm… let’s suggest this is not the most accurate read of our American Tea Bagger movement? Get rid of that word, “spontaneous,” for starters. Then remember that the teabaggers’ protest came almost immediately after Barack Obama signed the largest middle-class tax cut in history, affecting 95% of Americans.

“Race” also played a factor, according to radical Internet liberals.

So just don’t even try to out-crazy our wingnuts, Lobsterbacks, got it? OOOOH MUMMY MUMMY PRIME MINISTER GORDON CHUMMINGTON TOOKETH MY NINNY-NINNY GOLDEN MONEY FARTHINGS, MUMMY MUMMY SAVE ME MUMMY, whatever. Try speaking American for once.

British Tea Party Movement to Launch on Saturday [Telegraph]

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  • give us a bob

    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/YeOldeButcheredeEnglishe

    So are you begging them to invade New Orleans again?

  • SayItWithWookies

    And the Tea Partiers over here will welcome their British compatriots — right up until they find out they have universal healthcare — and like it.

  • qwerty42

    perhaps a gentleman’s drink of earl grey?

  • faustroll

    A far lower level of taxation brought Americans out in spontaneous protest last year.

    A very far lower level, as in zero. And over there, does “spontaneous” mean “orchestrated by a Republican affiliated PAC run by nincompoops and whackjobs” or do I need to break out my American to British dictionary?

  • grendel

    How many flags would a faggot fan fly, if a faggot fan could fly flags?

  • Joshua Norton

    They don’t really get the whole “Tea Party” meme, do they? They need something from their own side of the pond – like Guy Fawkes blowing up Parliament.

  • Come here a minute

    Nobody does teabagging like British queers — just ask Andrew Sullivan.

  • PsycGirl

    [re=520904]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Especially given the starchy comment from the BBC article linked earlier:
    “The US is the world’s richest nation and the only industrialised democracy that does not provide healthcare coverage to all its citizens. ”

    Whose apathy toward the sick and downtrodden are you insulting, British compatriots? Them’s fighting words!

  • El Pinche

    This has Peggy Noonan written all over it.

  • Cicada

    [re=520904]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Given the fact that teabaggers are famous for protesting against possible Medicare cuts, I’m going to go out on a limb and say consistency will not keep them from embracing their British brethren.

    Those damn europeeyun leetust’s using fancy words, on the other hand…

  • Jim Newell

    [re=520913]El Pinche[/re]: I have one tired, unreadable British cartoon voice, alas, to use for all British people in any scenario as well as Brooklyn native Peggy Noonan.

  • grendel

    Also, who are the British equivalent of the Koch family (the family who’s bankrolled the John Birch society, Cato Society, FreedomWorks, The Heritage Foundation, and over a dozen others…)? “Spontaneous” “Grassroots” movements, indeed….

  • iwillsavethispatient

    Ideas for names before they settled on Tea Party:
    – Spotted Dick Party
    – Toad in the Hole Party
    – Faggots and Dripping Party

  • bitchincamaro

    [re=520908]grendel[/re]: I raise a flagon of mead to your wordsmithery, sir.

  • freakishlystrong

    Labor not Labour, fucking teabags.

  • comicbookguy

    Keep your government hands off my NHS!!1!

  • germansteel

    But still, which country looks like it has invented dental care yet?

  • loquaciousmusic

    I don’t mean to be a spoilsport, but the original “Boston Tea Party” teabaggers actually dressed themselves up as Indians. Obviously, this is much more exciting than just wearing knickers!

  • Escape Goat Nation

    Has no one explained to them that England doesn’t have a Black President?

  • comicbookguy

    Government shouldn’t mandate dental care. That’s Hitler-style communism.

  • Extemporanus

    TEA FAG the LABOUR CHAVS BEFORE THEY TEA FAG YOU!!

  • El Pinche

    [re=520917]Jim Newell[/re]: British Tea Party Crumpets are more of a Cornish English. Noonan is definitely the Queen’s English.

    Some of the angry comments from Brits on that page are funny BTW. They’re about the same as our crazies but crumpetier. “You silly figgy pud! Please take your Parliamentary procedure and shove it a in dustbin!! If you were here, I would smite thee with a warm swash of tea, you fresh scoundrel!!”

  • Ruhe

    [re=520918]grendel[/re]: Conrad Black?

  • Ruhe

    [re=520918]grendel[/re]: Sorry. Should have said Sir Conrad Black, notorious ex-Canadian.

  • bhosp

    From the comments, about the British Value Added (Sales) Tax:

    “I asked my wife what would happen in the USA if a state charged 17.5 percent sales tax at the till. She replied, ‘There’d be a revolution.'”

    Isn’t this exactly what the wonky side of the GOP wants to replace the income tax with?

  • nappyduggs

    London calling.

  • J. Robert Oppenheiner
  • Cape Clod

    [re=520920]iwillsavethispatient[/re]:
    Fin and Haddy Party.
    Bubble and Squeak Party.

  • rocktonsammy

    these guys know how to put on a tea party

  • freakishlystrong

    From the comments:

    I AM A MEMBER OF THE TEA PARTY IN AMERICA.TO MY KNOWLEDGE WE HAVE ABOUT 15-17 MILLION PEOPLE IN OUR MOVEMENT AND ARE GROWING EVERY DAY BY LEAPS AND BOUNDS.WHEN WE FIRST STARTED WE WERE TOLD BY EVERYONE WE COULD NOT SUCCEED IN TAKING OUR COUNTRY BACK FROM THE PROGRESSIVES.THE NEWS MEDIA CALLED US EVERY BAD NAME IT COULD THINK OF.WE WERE RIDICULED BY THE PROGRESSIVES AND TOLD TO SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN,BUT WE LOVED OUR COUNTRY AND WE WERE DETERMINED.WE BELIEVE IN OUR CONSTITUTION.WE HAVE NOW STARTED TO CHANGE OUR REPUBLICAN PARTY AND MOVE IT BACK TO IT’S CONSERVATIVE ROOTS.WE HAVE WON THE LAST THREE STATE ELECTIONS,EVEN IN MASS. WHICH WAS VERY LIBERAL.YOU ARE AT THE BEGINNING OF YOUR MOVEMENT AND MANY WILL TRY TO DEMORALIZE YOU AND TRY TO STOP YOU,BUT DO NOT LISTEN.YOU HAVE MANY , MANY SUPPORTERS OVER HERE,YOU ARE NO LONGER ALONE.WE HAVE BEEN ALLIES IN MANY BATTLES,AND WE ARE YOUR BROTHERS IN THIS TIME OF CRISES.YOU WILL FIND AS YOU GROW IN NUMBERS THAT THERE ARE MANY OTHERS WHO ARE SHARE YOUR BELIEFS AND ARE READY TO JOIN THE FIGHT.

    All caps? Check
    Liberal? Check
    Wingnut? Check
    15-17 million? What the fuck?

  • jetjaguar

    Oh god, the next Bugle podcast will be FUCKING AWESOME.

  • Escape Goat Nation

    “WE HAVE BEEN ALLIES IN MANY BATTLES”

    Except for that uhhhh…Tea Party one.

    Yeah, so…. am I to understand that the English Tea Party members are protesting themselves?

  • PsycGirl

    [re=520969]freakishlystrong[/re]: The Tea Party is claiming Scott Brown as one of its own? I thought they cast him into the abyss earlier this week.

  • One Yield Regular

    My word! Imagine what may happen if a British Tea Party ship laden with Tea Party props sails into Boston harbor and meets the blindly passionate, tri-cornered nostalgic, Revolutionary War-reenactement fervor of American tea-baggers?

  • assistant/atlas

    Wait, do the British have an even shakier grasp on history than Americans? Well, I guess they do have a lot more history to remember.

  • jodyleek

    [re=520920]iwillsavethispatient[/re]: Tarts and Vicars Party.

  • S.Luggo

    [re=520932]Escape Goat Nation[/re]:

    At least not since this guy: http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/10/29/article-0-07037711000005DC-828_468x688.jpg

    He encountered a speck of trouble at Bosworth Field when he tried to enact Serf Care Reform.

  • DustBowlBlues

    Wonder if they would consider trading their tax rates and the NHS for our taxes and our health (lack of) system?

    I would totally buy into that deal.

  • DustBowlBlues

    [re=520926]comicbookguy[/re]: You completely beat me to that one. I read the comments before I ventured the same thing.

    A British friend was visiting at the same time my youngest, who had just graduated from college, got a job as a labor organizer. The friend and I were at the local bank in our little town and I told the teller my daughter had gotten a job–with full benefits! Everyone at the bank reacted to the benefits part with such excitement that when friend and I went back outside, she said, “You people really do have a health care crisis, don’t you?”

  • iwillsavethispatient

    [re=520969]freakishlystrong[/re]: I really hope the British Teabaggers embrace the whole “believe in our constitution” thing, seeing Britain has an unwritten constitution. I guess that means that’d have to believe in it, as they can’t see it.

  • iwillsavethispatient

    [re=521004]jodyleek[/re]: I’m pretty sure that was the Conservative Party in the mid-nineties. Ugh, I just got a flash-back of David Mellor. Stomach-turning.

  • Katydid

    [re=520911]PsycGirl[/re]: Remember how there was always one kid, usually in junior high, who would always say, “The United States is a republic, not a democracy,” whereupon people would beat the snot out of him?

  • grevillea

    Silly Brits, getting all excited cos they think it’s literally a tea party. I remember Bill Bryson writing something about how the middle-class English can conceive of nothing more thrilling than having a cup of tea with a dry biscuit (cookie), OUTSIDE on a fine day…

  • AnnieGetYourFun

    [re=521036]Katydid[/re]: I still do that, but all my boyfriend can do is grumble about how stupid republics are.

  • JMP

    Doesn’t the UK already have an official party for the overt racists in the BNP? I’m not sure what need they really have for a new one.

    [re=521028]iwillsavethispatient[/re]: Well, having the unwritten constitution should make it even easier for them to just pretend it says what they wish it did.

  • Katydid

    [re=521026]DustBowlBlues[/re]: Yeah, sure, nice story and all, but why don’t you admit “labor organizer” is a euphemism for “works for ACORN?” Bleeding heart commie lib who steals our tax munnies for the poors just to screw the banks you are.

  • BlueStateLiberal

    [re=521028]iwillsavethispatient[/re]: Doesn’t matter, we have a written constitution, and I can assure you no American teabagger has ever bothered to read it.

  • Katydid

    [re=521047]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Which do you still do, say the US is a republic, or beat the crap out of junior high kids?

    I actually admire American adults who know the difference between a republic and a democracy, and understand which form of govt we have, as I’m pretty sure the percentage of the population who know is depressingly low. There we go, being liberal elites again, understanding things.

  • Katydid

    [re=521061]BlueStateLiberal[/re]: Teabaggers may not have read the Constitution, but they’re positive liberals hate it, “for its freedoms.” And I really really want to punch people who say “freedoms” instead of “freedom.”

  • comicbookguy

    [re=521053]Katydid[/re]: and “works for ACORN” is just a euphemism for “provides free tax advice to teenage white pimps and hos.”

  • S.Luggo

    [re=521028]iwillsavethispatient[/re]: A few years ago George Bush addressed the House of Commons and got heckled. (Laura, such a rowdy.) When asked about it, George replied, “Well, I guess it’s their First Amendment right.” Idiot.

  • TimeCubist

    What’s a monkey farthing?

  • Min

    British Tea Party To Launch With Protestations

    I misread this. I thought the Brits were getting ready to catapult a few Baptists and Methodists into the frey.

  • canadasteve

    The Telegraph is nicknamed the “Torygraph” for a reason. They are vehemently anti-Labour. Why, they’re the British “Washington Times”.

  • Jukesgrrl

    [re=520969]freakishlystrong[/re]: Punctuation errors, CHECK.

    [re=521077]Katydid[/re]: There’s more than one freedom, Katydid. There’s:
    – the freedom white men believe was bestowed upon them by God,
    – the freedom white men were willing to allow wimmins and some people of other colors to have,
    – the double-freedom enjoyed by corporations who are also people,
    – the freedom granted begrudgingly to people like criminals (e.g. Miranda rights),
    – and the freedom we force on other people (e.g. Iraqis).
    That’s FIVE freedoms right there!

  • El Pinche

    [re=520969]freakishlystrong[/re]: He ment to say 15-17 bajillion

  • El Pinche

    [re=521061]BlueStateLiberal[/re]: If it’s not microwave or stove-top instructions, teabaggers haven’t read it.

  • Jukesgrrl

    [re=521178]El Pinche[/re]: Aw, c’mon. They read the “Casual Encounters” on Craigslist.

  • MilwaukeeKent

    Irony drips, since these are the same Conservative/Tory/Royalist f*cks we sniped from the woods not long after the first Tea Party. Hilarious to see our Tea Baggers allied with Brit Conservatives.

    Those British women, though — American girls may have junk in the trunk, but they’ve got loot in the boot!

    The Brits just want to be spanked by their nannies.

    Anyone starting a Coffee Party in Wisocnisn?

  • MilwaukeeKent

    Gah! Wisconsin! Rule Dyslexia! And may the sun never set on the British Empire! Oh yeah, it did. Well, there will always be another England…

  • El Pinche

    [re=521203]Jukesgrrl[/re]:

    Horny Patriot, BBW, loves Constitution, Small Govt, scat play. Meet at Dennys restroom, Exit 398, 3rd stall at 11 pm tonight. Nobama

  • DustBowlBlues

    [re=521053]Katydid[/re]: Busted.

  • AddHomonym

    [re=521069]Katydid[/re]: But in Venn Diagrams, the “Republic” circle is entirely inside the “Democracy” circle, n’est-ce pas?

  • sezme

    This is just a promo for that new Tim Burton movie. Will the Mad Hatter (Osama bin Laden?) be there?

  • sezme

    [re=521210]MilwaukeeKent[/re]: Wisconsin? Likely a weak coffee party.

  • Mr Blifil

    Don’t fuck with the Brits. They will off you and hide the evidence for 75 years, just to piss off your grandchildren when it turns out yeah, they murdered you.

  • S.Luggo

    Hannan: Anglo-Irish, anti-immigrant, Borg assassin raised on a family poultry plantation in Peru.

    Works for me.

  • yoink

    The Doody’s being declared Mr.Brain’s faggot family

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxSWUK80h7M&feature=related

  • comicbookguy

    These patriots deserve our support. Every day they suffer under the tyranny of socialized medicine, and they all yearn for the freedom to buy their own insurance, or not, if it’s too expensive. Freedom!

    When you hear of tyranny in the world, socialized medicine is everywhere, I bet it makes you glad you never left Kansas.

  • Aimee Dan

    Worth reading blog … still we need to implement the things so far!

    Plantation Dental Services

  • K. Kim

    I have been to several such repellent dentists, and seen many more of them in action. If you are aware of any others who are willing to provide real service and treatment without one eye always on their profit margins, please let the people know who they are.

    K.Kim
    Plantation Dentist

  • Joan S.minaj

    Plantation Dental had a similar previous celebration

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