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Soviet Pedobears 4 Liberties.
Good to see the Russian chapter of NAMBLA made it out for the big GOP conference.

This is why they need to drive Chevy Tahoes.
Ronald Reagan personally designed all of these wingnut bumper stickers on his Apple II, in Heaven.

Never forget the day a gay plane killed all the Japanese people, for freedom.
Celebrating homosexual culture *and* the nuking of whatever race we hated back then.

FINAL (???) CPAC REPORT FROM GARRETT QUINN:

Sorry I didn’t get more stuff. Was busy actually writing, drinking overpriced beer ($7 for a pint? Fuck You DC), bothering Paultards, searching for knickknacks, searching out people from Massachusetts, arguing soccer, and networking.

CPAC was bigger this year but I think the venue wasn’t as good as the Omni.

Higher number of dudes in colonial garb than previous years.

Didn’t really pick up any social-con vibe other than when they booed that guy off the stage and when Rick Santorum spoke.

No Joe the Plumber made my heart cry inside.

Giant posters of Palin or Coulter were available for young conservative dorm rooms everywhere.

I’ll put something together for you later more thorough. The video of the CPAC aftermath is worth it. A great farewell to CPAC.

Thanks again to GARRETT3000 for all these great pictures and reports.

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  • StripesAndPlaids

    I suppose the right bear arms is better than the right to arm bears.

  • President Beeblebrox

    Giant posters of Palin or Coulter were available for young conservative dorm rooms everywhere.

    Who knew tranny porn was so big in colleges these days?

  • norbizness

    I agree with them, so long as they’re confined to muskets and required to shoot themselves.

  • memzilla

    Furries in colonial garb? The right to Pedobear arms?

  • freakishlystrong

    Dear Wingnuts, if, indeed, “Government is the problem and not the Solution”, please, stay the fuck out of it.

    Thank you,

    PS: what are “bear arms”?

  • Extemporanus

    “You can have my cock when you pry it from my cold, dead kid!”

  • Smoke Filled Roommate

    Is that pronounced “Kuh-kirk-ba”?

  • SmutBoffin
  • coolcatdaddy

    I’m sorry – I can’t respect any movement that makes bumper stickers with Comic Sans.

  • V572625694

    You know what’s funny about the teabaggers? Nothing, right? But you know what’s ridiculous about ’em? It’s that they don’t even know what the Boston Tea Party was about. It wasn’t about seeking freedom from England, or oppressive taxation. It was local Boston tea merchants protesting the “globalization” caused by imported English tea, which would be cheaper than theirs. In other words, a little squabble about tariffs, not a heroic struggle against colonialist oppression. Read all about it here.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_Tea_Party

    Oh, and pretty soon Scalia’s going to extinguish gun laws everywhere, not just DC. And since corporations are real people now, like Pinocchio, they’ll be able to have guns too! Hooray for democracy, as interpreted by old Catholics on the Supreme Court!

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    What happened to the flaccid elephant?

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    Oh no no, Ken. Dear Dead Ronnie wasn’t nearly technologically adept to operate any Mac product. His speed was definitely more Coleco Adam. In hell, also, as well.

  • Extemporanus

    [re=517151]memzilla[/re]: Remember, Pedobear is one of the faces of the GOP.

  • norbizness

    I thought they were named after Cartman’s Tea Party, not the Boston Tea Party.

    http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/southpark/images/3/3a/Cartman%27s_tea_party.jpg

    “I think you’re a big fat piece of crap!”

  • OhPleeze

    I don’t want Nobama’s nazi-lovin, socialist gubmint cuttin off my arms, or takin’ away my god-given right to wear sleeveless dresses!!! Trig 2013!!!!

  • HuddledMass

    [re=517163]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: No, no that grey thing is the Obama Fail Whale. Or Cthulu….

  • bhosp

    [re=517147]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Coulter actually looks pretty hot in her CPAC poster. My boner doesn’t know what to do!

  • Snarkalicious

    [re=517162]V572625694[/re]: Well, eventually, all of the corporations will merge into one under the glorious leadership of a man they will call ‘The Pope’. Do you want The Pope to go without his Luger and Stielhandgranaten? Asshole.

  • Prommie

    Whatever happened to the fundie christ-tards? Didn’t they used to run the GOP? Every GOP preznit candidate had to formally begin his campaign at Bob Jones, for God’s sake, it was in the rule book.

    But they are gone, in a flash, they have vanished, and now here is the mob of, well, basically they are all Birchers now.

    Never thought I would say this, but I miss the fundie-tard, these Patriots scare me.

  • V572625694

    [re=517162]V572625694[/re]: Oh and another gun issue, soon to be resolved to society’s detriment. The Second Amendment talks about the right to keep and bear “arms.” It’s pretty obvious that “arms” includes machine guns, poison gas, flame-throwers, nuclear weapons, mortars, hand grenades, C4 explosive, intercontinental ballistic missiles, etc, even though none of these fine things had been invented when the Bill of Rights was composed by Jefferson. If you let government tell you you can’t have a Mk-19 grenade launcher, pretty soon they’ll tell you you can’t have a slingshot. So look for a big expansion at your local gun store, soon!

  • Lazy Media

    Didn’t Gavrilo Ssrkva shoot Arch Duke Ferdinand, precipitating WWI? Good times.

  • gurukalehuru

    CCRKBA looks godawful Soviet.

  • Magnus Maximus

    Hoho, “got a birth certificate?”

    JUST LIKE THE MILK ADS GUYS LOL

  • Mr Blifil

    What was Cockblockers Anonymous doing there in the first place?

  • Hooray For Anything

    [re=517158]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: Sounds Arabic to me. Just sayin’

    [re=517162]V572625694[/re]: Gun toting corporations? That could make customer support a bit more interesting.

    Apple’s guns would probably conch out just as they fire but would look awesome in doing so, Microsoft’s would take about twenty minutes to lock and load and then crash, NBC/Comcast would spend a lot of money on a new-fangled gun only to replace it three months later with a really old one, Starbucks’ guns would shoot out Dave Mathews CDs, Toyota’s would just fire and fire and fire and not stop firing, and Goldman Sachs would napalm an entire neighborhood and then get the Government to pay for rebuilding what they burned down.

  • imissopus

    [re=517173]bhosp[/re]: They left this tag off of Coulter’s poster:

    *Not Pictured: Coulter’s Penis

    Hope that helps. One way or the other.

  • Lazy Media

    [re=517162]V572625694[/re]: Uh…sort of. The Boston colonists didn’t import tea themselves, and they sure as heck didn’t grow it. The whole war started over rich Britons in America being angry that they weren’t given the same rights and privileges as rich Britons in England. Y’know, freedom.

  • V572625694

    [re=517198]Lazy Media[/re]: One should never let so-called “facts” get in the way of a good argument. It’s not like were The New Republic.

  • Tundra Grifter

    [re=517173]bhosp[/re]: According to this morning’s radio show, Jimmy “JJ” Walker (not “Beau James,” the former mayor of New York City – he’s pretty dead; a great Bob Hope movie, however) beat you to it…

  • Smoke Filled Roommate

    [re=517186]Magnus Maximus[/re]: Where’s ‘Klan Calvin’ pissing on a fiery Obama with a burning cross in the background? They do make those decals, right?

  • Re: the top middle bumper sticker in that second pic: the only thing worse than random quote marks around things are random opening quote markes that you never close.

  • Lionel Hutz Esq.

    Everyone knows the real action at CPAC is in the Men’s Restrooms.

  • Tundra Grifter

    [re=517198]Lazy Media[/re]: LM: Actually, the American Revolution was supported by a cross-section of Colonists. It wasn’t just the rich or just the poor (unlike many revolutions since then). It wasn’t a majority, of course. Current reliable estimates are it was about a third of the population (with another third opposed and the final third waiting to see what happened).

    I certainly would agree with you that American Colonists wanted to be treated like British citizens.

    And the Boston Tea Party was against lower taxes. The British government wanted to help out the East India Company by making their tea cheaper. The Colonists resisted.

    Isn’t that what today’s Tea Baggers want – higher taxes?

  • Come here a minute

    [re=517216]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: I think the “glare” is hiding the “close quote”, but otherwise, “good point.

  • richardwb1

    [re=517166]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: I doubt that Raygun could operate a typewriter, of any vintage.

  • Magnus Maximus

    [re=517213]Smoke Filled Roommate[/re]: If they don’t, I suggest you get on that, stat! Ethics/integrity be damned; you’re sitting on a goldmine!

  • Come here a minute

    I[re=517216]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: I’m sure you’ve heard about “this”.

  • Fred Wertham Jr.

    [re=517179]Prommie[/re]: Maybe the fundie Christ-tards got raptured and nobody noticed. Somebody should go check cuz FREE STUFF.

  • Chernobyl Soup

    Meh. Any sign can be funny in the right context. Perfect example: in my town there’s this elevator repair guy driving around. Sign on his truck say “Schindler’s Elevators”. Nothing funny about that. But move this guy’s business to, say, London, and that shit is hilarious.

  • Extemporanus

    [re=517216]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: [re=517226]Come here a minute[/re]: Maybe the “SOCIALISM” bumpersticker could practice what it preaches by sharing one of its apostroquotedoohickies with the “NO WE CANT” bumpersticker on the bottom.

  • Smoke Filled Roommate

    [re=517229]Come here a minute[/re]: Am I “drinking” this “shit”?

  • SlouchingTowardsWasilla

    CCRKBA – is pronounced sis-er-ick-ba. Rolls right off the tongue.

  • FlownOver

    Has the “Wriggling Around Caucus” bus already left?

  • Barry White Zombie

    [re=517184]gurukalehuru[/re]: It made me think of some 1985 Grateful Dead. http://www.rrcp.net/store/pc/catalog/gratefuldead20yearssofar_1031_detail.jpg
    Not their strongest year, but not bad by later standards.

  • Hooray For Anything

    [re=517259]SlouchingTowardsWasilla[/re]:
    CCRKBA
    Oh the time has come
    And you know that you’re the only one
    To say O.K.
    Where you going
    What you looking for
    You know those boys
    Don’t want to play no more with you
    It’s true

    You’re motoring

  • S.Luggo

    Design class is a gateway drug:
    http://tinyurl.com/ya5c76c

  • pub_option

    Are they implying that Karl Marx was not a socialist, since he wanted the workers to lose their chains?

  • This Cat

    [re=517198]Lazy Media[/re]: I thought John Hancock and John Adams were tea importers (smugglers)

  • McDuff

    [re=517146]StripesAndPlaids[/re]: Now that the socialist anti-gun Obama signed the law allowing U.S. Americans to carry guns in the National parks, maybe my ranger buddies better arm those bears.

  • sati demise

    [re=517179]Prommie[/re]: Jerry Falwell is trying to make a zombie comeback. You know he is in negotiations with Belzeebub.

  • Chet Kincaid

    CCRKBA is pronounced “cock-grabber”. You’re welcome.

  • proudgrampa

    [re=517204]V572625694[/re]: Facts? I don’ got to show you no stinkin’ facts!

  • Potater

    Ooh, free pics of the CPAC afterbirth!

  • rocktonsammy

    Common sense gun lobby= legal pot

    usa.

  • rocktonsammy

    We have an Enola Gay and DADT?

  • Slamtundra

    Cocaine Cannot Kill My Pain either, motherfuckers. And I clearly don’t have as much pain as you do.

  • BeWoot

    [re=517229]Come here a minute[/re]: Thanks “for” the link. You made my day. (I know. Sad, isn’t it?)

  • Captain Swing

    Common sense – Gun Lobby.

    Oxy – moron.

  • swamijoe

    [re=517226]Come here a minute[/re]: fuck you guys (gays?) are good…I’ve only been readin’ teh Wonkette for years and not commentin’ cuz I been afraid too look stoopid?!

  • AxmxZ

    For the record: “Ссяква” in Russian portmanteaus into something like “pissy pumpkin.”

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