SHARE

Jeff Gannon for Veep!
Official Wonkette CPAC spy Garrett Quinn took this cell-phone picture of a very handsome and distinguished plaid blazer, probably bought in 1979 at the Sears men’s sale. Oh, and what’s on this lovely sportscoat? A political firebomb, that’s what! Dick Cheney –the chuckling horror sack who designed and directed the moral, financial and military bankruptcy of the United States — should be drafted as a GOP candidate for president in 2012! Super great idea, but Cheney has never had any trouble evading the draft. (You know, because he’s a fat fucking coward, remember?)

Don't forget to light your Parliament 100 with a semi-automatic!
Here’s Garrett trying to take a picture after his tenth Jameson or whatever the Irish drink these days. (Other than the blood of white children, ha ha ha.) We’ve sharpened the image as much as possible, and we *think* this is a precious souvenir ashtray from the National Rifle Association. It’ll look great stacked up on the knick-knack shelves in the “den” with all the other weird yet meaningless mass-produced Made In Taiwan crap collected over the last century or so: Hula girl from that trip to Hawaii in 1971, miniature negro lawn jockey to replace the real one your goddamned hippie faggot kids berated you about for twenty years, until you reluctantly put it in the garage in the mid 1980s when that Bill Cosby was always on the teevee, funny salt shaker of a lazy Mexican asleep under a saguaro cactus, etc.

THANK YOU GARRETT QUINN FOR THE REPORTS. Young Mister Quinn blogs regularly on his blog about Scott Brown being so sexy, at least compared to Martha Coakley. Garrett Quinn actually got Scott Brown elected. Think about this.

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
  • thefrontpage

    Everyone will read “Angler,” Cheney will be tossed in jail for life, and we won’t have to worry about this corrupt, lying, delusional psycho any more.

  • freakishlystrong

    Quite frankly “drafting” Dick for anything is a losing proposition. He’s a war criminal also. Evil fuck.

  • Dashboard_Buddha

    Cheney – the chuckling horror sack

    Perfect description.

  • Fox News Light

    If you look behind the sticker you can see he is wearing “Dickies” brand clothing…which isn’t anything Cheney makes..its the clothes of working men sold at Wal-Mart….

  • Dashboard_Buddha

    Nice jacket. “Used Car Dealers for Cheney” – It fits.

  • BarackMyWorld

    Any draft of Cheney should have happened in 1968.

  • ManchuCandidate

    Unlike the last time when his other priorities were
    1) Not getting killed
    2) Not getting killed
    3) Needed to “support” the war on the home front
    4) Don’t like loud noises
    5) Afraid Army would find out he still wets the bed

    Dick just wants to enjoy his retirement feasting on roasted aborted fetuses and shooting his fellow GOPers in the face.

  • Gregoire

    Please Dick, run for president.

  • Ken Layne

    [re=517010]Fox News Light[/re]: Our correspondent says it was actually a “CPAC hipster,” which is frightening enough, but it’s also true that the low-level hipsters of about 10 years ago in certain second-tier towns would ironically wear Dickies work clothing when they went to see Reverend Horton Heat or whatever. MY SEARS COMMENT HOWEVER IS BETTER THAN THE REALITY.

  • Poochie

    Bok, bok, bok, chichenhawk.

  • queeraselvis v 2.0

    [re=517010]Fox News Light[/re]: Dickies is like a grown-up version of Garanimals. This explains VOLUMES.

  • proudgrampa
  • Way Cool Larry

    But a liberal blogger LIED about good old Dick!!!!
    http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2010/02/lies-and-damned-bloggers.html

  • Way Cool Larry

    [re=517020]proudgrampa[/re]: I don’t know, I don’t usually associate the Penguin with war crimes, just buffoonery.

  • Prommie

    [re=517017]Ken Layne[/re]: No, no, the Dickies were a california punk band that made the album “Stukas Over Disneyworld.” Also its a fake turtleneck.

  • Fox News Light

    [re=517017]Ken Layne[/re]: In fear of the ban hammer I will do nothing but agree with you. That is most def a Dickies Blazer sold at Sears during the Reagan campaign.

  • JMP

    C’mon, teabaggers; you should know by now that Cheney prefers to govern from the shadows in his undisclosed underground bunkers, manipulating the nearly-mindless puppet he’s put on the throne as a figurehead and a distraction. He’s never going to run for anything that requires him to step out into the daylight as the official ruler, in part because sunlight causes his people to burst into flames.

    He could use a new mindless figurehead, though; so Palin/Cheney 2012!

  • proudgrampa

    [re=517022]Way Cool Larry[/re]: My point exactly!

  • Monsieur Grumpe

    I think (hope) Flannel Man actually meant draft Cheney into the marines. They could have him clearing IEDs by walking around.

  • Terry

    So when will Cheney’s evil straight daughter run for office?

  • JMP

    [re=517020]proudgrampa[/re]: He’s always reminded me more of this guy, only more corpulent:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master_%28Buffy_the_Vampire_Slayer%29

  • Snarkalicious

    Holy SHIT, people, do you realize what this means? The Cheney we have right now is ONLY A DRAFT? Fucking hell, what is the finnished product going to look like? Motherfucking Gojira and shit.

  • SayItWithWookies

    I’m not worried that any number of enthusiastic fans could persuade Cheney to run. What would give me the heebie-jeebies is if he got appointed to some sort of presidential selection committee.

  • WIDTAP

    Of course one would expect Dick “Deficits Don’t Matter” Cheney to do real well with Americans afraid of deficit spending, right?

  • Autoo

    [re=517021]Way Cool Larry[/re]: But a liberal blogger LIED about good old Dick!!!!

    OMG! This means global warming is a hoax, doesn’t it?

  • FMA

    Everybody knows that any attempt to draft Cheney will be fruitless since he has better things to do.
    Besides, once they demand to see his birth certificate, they will learn that as someone who was born in hell, the bastard son of one Satan’s more evil minions, he is constitutionally unqualified to be president.

  • teebob2000

    Fail. He’s an expert at dodging the draft.

  • Lascauxcaveman

    [re=517017]Ken Layne[/re]: low-level hipsters of about 10 years ago in certain second-tier towns would ironically wear Dickies work clothing

    So THAT explains all the Dickies-brand guitar straps on eBay. I bought a lot of 6 of them for maybe $20, including a plaid one that matches the shirt in the photo above.

  • sanantonerose

    [re=517019]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: Hey! I used to wear Garanimals. Some days I still long for those orange giraffe tops with matching shorts. Would make getting ready for work so much easier.

  • An Outhouse

    I don’t think that photo is of a blazer. Its a picture of curling pants.
    See photo #10
    http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2010/02/vancouver_2010_part_1_of_2.html

  • June Cleaver 2.0

    [re=517024]Prommie[/re]: “Also its a fake turtleneck.”

    Now I’m understanding things.

  • Kinkster

    I love how there’s a more hipster than thou contest going on in the comments here. Then again, after that Inaugural Ball, i can believe it.

  • Mr Blifil

    Obviously the sticker tag thing is a typo and it was intended to read “Drat Cheney!” for having plunged CPAC into bitter exchanges between Andrew Breitbart and various negroes.

  • El Pinche

    [re=517017]Ken Layne[/re]: Dickies make my Dick Swett.

  • coolcatdaddy

    So when did they start making a beer called “Cheney”?

  • snideinplainsight

    Cheney/Dahmer 2012
    Wicked beats evil every time –

  • sati demise

    [re=517017]Ken Layne[/re]: the whiskey is Powers, not Jameson. Powers.

    and yea, draft Cheney and put him in charge of ending DADT in Afghanistan.

  • Long Form Def Certificate

    [re=517017]Ken Layne[/re]: You prolly could have made a lot of money crooning “Cowboy Love” at CPAC Afterhours.

    “I wanna take to steppin’, with a strong & handsome big black buck. I want him to pick me up in his Chevrolet pick-up truck. & when we get to dancin’, all the other boys won’t know what to do. It’s just that interracial cowboy, homo kind of love”.

  • snideinplainsight

    Eds, please please make a thread about the Dunkin Doughnuts Owners’ PAC and related comments over at RedMassGroup.com – there’s no way Wonkett could possibly be funnier than the comments they already have over there. To wit;

    These guys could be huge (5.00 / 1)
    I think that an endorsement from the PAC for Dunkin Donuts could be huge! They pride themselves on appealing to the “working man” and salt of the earth types. They are originally from MA, and they are literally everywhere. I used to work at a dunks when I was in High School and loved it. I mean I literally have “Dunkin Donuts” specifically labeled in my personal budget for each month. Last month alone I spent $152.88 at dunks, so I know they have the money to support the max donation. (2.73 for a large black ice coffee * 2 * 7 days * 4 weeks. Also want to give a shout out to my boy Sean in Davis Sq. you are the man & Billy at the Beacon St. location next to FOX 25 kicks ass!)

  • Dean Booth
  • Magnus Maximus

    Draft Cheney…new from Anheuser Busch. Brewed with the tears of real detainees!

  • Extemporanus

    [re=517017]Ken Layne[/re]: In 1979, Sears made its own reality.

    Also, fuck Billy Corgan.

  • Extemporanus

    [re=517037]FMA[/re]: If dead men don’t wear plaid, what do undead men not wear?

  • Extemporanus

    Here’s what the other side of that, ahem, “ashtray”, looks like.

  • NYNYNY

    My dream ticket for the republicans is Dick Cheney/Henry Kissinger. I know, unlikely, but it’s my dream. Look, they’re going to lose, unless Obama creates a recession. Right now he’s got a track record of pulling us out of an uber-recession…Ok, Kissinger was born in Germany, so he’s not eligible to be VP. Oh- George Shultz is still alive. And he’s wicked white and statesmany. Cheney/Shultz.

  • Darkness

    Funny thing about Cheney, he has no trouble carrying a gun when there are old men to be shot in the face.

  • teebob2000

    [re=517038]teebob2000[/re]: Hey, dumbass — next time read the whole post before you comment.

  • Potater

    Has anyone read the Garret Quinn blog? The day Dunkin’ Donuts qualifies as a “small business” is the day Dick Cheney qualifies for the Source Awards.

    “Pouring coffee is a bad career choice to make a living”
    Please tell me conservatives are not REALLY this fucking stupid. This is an act they put on, right? Some sick, twisted, migraine-inducing bit of improv, RIGHT?

  • desertwind

    Dick? No mention of Dick there.

    It’s all about the Liz.

  • Betty Cracker

    Those boneheads got the URL wrong! This is the REAL one: http://www.draftdickcheney2012.com/

  • S.Luggo

    The flying buzzard disc is the Teabaggers’ equivalent of a Saint Christopher medal. It protects the baggers from ACORNs and poors wandering retirement villages, what with their Food Stamps and Medicaid cards and all.

  • Escape Goat Nation

    I gotta go with Riggs or Carhartt workwear over Dickies. Dickies are made more for people that have to wear some kind of, “Uniform” like Mechanics or the guy who drives around and fills up snack machines. If you fuck up your pants, you can get another pair for fairly cheap. This why the skateboard kids used to wear them all the time. You can usually find them at a thrift store.

    I’m a very amateur Wildlife Photographer and the Riggs Cargo pants and shorts are excellent.
    Durable Rip Stop Fabric and lot’s of easily accessible pockets for extra batteries,cards, Lens caps, GPS, maps and whatever.
    http://www.riggsworkwear.com/Catalog/men/bottoms/ripstop/3W060#

    For shirts and Jackets I go with Carhartt.

    In cold weather I go with the Patagonia Capilene long johns.

  • Extemporanus

    [re=517246]Escape Goat Nation[/re]: Welcome to—————– http://www.9elife.com ———————————-

    All kinds of world brand shoes,jeans,t-shirts,bikini,beach pants,handbags,wallets,sunglasses,belt,caps,watches etc..Doc Martinz shox(R4,NZ,OZ,TL1,TL2,TL3) $35,Sunglasses(Dickies,riggs,carrhatr,Patoganja) $16,Sunglasses(Dickies,riggs,carrhatr,Patoganja) $16

    New era crap $15!!

    ————— have some cheap things …———————

    ————— have some good shit …———————

    ————————— free shipping!

    —————– http://www.9elife.com ———————————-\

  • Escape Goat Nation

    I’m not really a spammer.
    I just thought I write something odd.
    But it is a True Story.

  • Extemporanus

    [re=517272]Extemporanus[/re]: I know you’re not a spammer — you didn’t mention nike shox. I just wanted to draw more attention to your odd yet True Story.

    As a photographer myself, I found it very informative, even though I do all my outdoor shooting (mostly urban settings like buses, subway, schools, etc.) in the nude.

  • Escape Goat Nation

    Ok good.
    I can’t do nude, because by mid summer, the places I go are full of all kinds of nasty things that are out to gitchya like Stinging nettles, tick, chiggers, skeeters, sand flies, thistles, thorny bushes and such.

  • Starrigavan

    Don’t know how old Dickie is going to get out of this one, he used up all his draft deferments in the 1960’s.

Previous articleDingell Will Be A Congressman Until The End Of Recorded Time
Next articleCPAC Monkey Only Illustrates Metaphorical Wildness of Federal Government