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Oh, how we are looking forward to the midterm elections! They’re the most fun: dozens of close races where we couldn’t care less about who wins, each defined by some hilarious racist remark or decades-old hotel affair or nutty family member. OR — as is the case in this rare 2009 election, for New Jersey governor — weight. “Political experts” monitoring the race between Jon Corzine and Republican Chris Christie have been wondering for a while now whether Christie’s campaign will sink under his massive massive super-fat insanely obese body. The Fats have rarely done well in elections — it’s true! — at least in the modern era, when male fatness stopped being a symbol of wealth and power and Land. So, is Corzine playing the “fat card” against his fat opponent, in his new ad?

No! Stop being so nitpicky about common metaphors, you bloggers!

But then again! It is kind of peculiar that we don’t see an image of fat Chris Christie until the very moment when the ad accuses him of “throwing his weight around.” It is only then that we see his fat, fat head, which dovetails most professionally into footage of the fat Chris Christie looking funny as he steps out of a car. Fat people always look funny when they step out of cars. Especially in slow-motion!

On another note, isn’t this a potential VULNERABILITY for Corzine, to release a full attack on an opponent for not taking the proper vehicular safety measures? Granted, there are degrees of everything… but…

Chris Christie is FAT. HE EATS SANDWICHES MADE OF SMALL CHILDREN. CHRIS CHRISTIE DOES THIS.

Corzine accuses Christie of ‘throwing weight around’ [Ben Smith]

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