SHARE


Magic prize goes to anybody who can figure out what these people are even protesting.

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC

149 COMMENTS

  1. I haven’t felt this patriotic since the last time i got naked, huffed gasoline, sat down in an apple pie and pleasured myself to 15 Americajaculations whilst watching all the Rocky movies back to back to back to back to back to back to back, or however many of them there are.

  2. Maybe this is like the Ring? You watch this video and 7 days later you start dressing like Glenn Beck?

    When are these people ever going to actually fucking explain which rights are being suppressed? They keep mentioning this, but never have they said what rights are being suppressed?

  3. All I got was they were protesting thinness and laws banning sister fucking. or something like that.

    Nice FUPA on the dude in the red shirt at the beginning. also

  4. You are fat blood-engorged tics pricking the emaciated dog that is the global economy. But your free ride will end soon. Then you will be truly free — free to starve in the gutter, simultaneously ranting about what the world owes you and damning ‘socialism’.

  5. They are protesting the fact that you, Mr. Ken Make-Them-Write-Captions Layne, have not told us who the winner(s) is(are). So, I for one hope that they find your hairy face and and hug it to their man tits. blech.

  6. People thinking that they are not America, apparently, since they keep saying over and over how they are America.

    This will make it funnier when they start discussing secession. Do you think that when they try to secede, they will want their country to be called “Real America”?

  7. I think the vagueness is exactly the point: because Republicans only have the crazies left, they can only draw people to the streets through coded, general sentiment unattached to official Republican ideology.

  8. Okay, I think I’ve got it. These cracker-people are pissed off that their “futures” are in the hands of a Negroid-type person who’s going to spend all their money on malt liquor for his buddies and blunts full of marijuana for their undeserving young and the rest of that shiftless “community” which he wasted so much time and ACORN money organizing. …And lottery tickets, can’t forget the lottery tickets.

    Well, the crackers are right. They’re fucked. All that money that Hopey’s going to waste is going to come straight from them. He, his “community” buddies, and his new-found rich-guy banker friends are going to screw the cracker class, but good.

    I just think it’s time to bail.

  9. They’re protesting the almighty power that Obama has to bring out their racist moranic asses from their backwoods dwellings and KOA trailer parks. They’re pissed because they have to stand around and whine when they could be beastfucking livestock or their siblings, or watching Wifeswap.

  10. [re=297130]Tommmcatt[/re]: It would be wrong if you didn’t let Memphis counter-secede. The exurbs can go with the rest of the hicks, though.

    Jeebus Johnson, my heart swells with pride at my wonderful home state.

  11. The saddest thing about the “tea party” stunt wasn’t that it was orchestrated by Fox. It was that it was so incoherent from a message perspective, as this video clip shows. I mean, what were they protesting? Taxes? But 95% of taxpayers will see their taxes go down if Obama gets his way. Government spending? Then why protest on April 15, and why a “tea party” — which was all about taxes, I seem to recall? These rather small, dispirited gatherings were really expressions of inchoate hatred for the Obama Administration — and perhaps, at heart, for the President himself.

    Evan Adamson
    readtakeover.com

  12. As a person with a Gomer Pyle accent (and I’m not kidding either — I’d match my ability to sound like I wandered off Tobacco Road with any of the dumbfucks in that video) I’m deeply embarrassed to say that these idiot racist wingnuts are actually protesting the absolutely unacceptable fact that a black guy was elected President. Doesn’t the last election constitute “tyranny” in and of itself?

    I’m getting my weapon ready for the Million Armed and Stupid Wingnut March on Washington as we speak.

  13. They’re mad about change. They don’t know what that change is but they want things the way they thought they used to be. But they weren’t that way at all. And now they’re confused.

  14. [re=297202]Evan Adamson[/re]: No, no! They’re right, they’re fucked. They need to up the ante and start throwing around gallons of milk and packages of microwave bacon. Their protests are just starting to work! If they don’t organize a riding-lawnmower march on Washington, they’re going to lose, for sure. And I will be truly disappointed.

  15. Ummm, ‘scuze me folks, but is NO ONE liveblogging Levi-the-fuckin’-redneck valiantly facing down the relentlessly inquisitive and witheringly adversarial logical-assault of Larry King?
    WHERE IS THE OUTRAGEOUS SNARK? WON’T SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN (who are old enough to laugh their asses off at this EPIC FAIL of a GOP ‘family values’ media circus?

  16. I say let them secede, along with the Governor of Texas. Shut them off completely; open up the southern border, but first plow their roads like a sod pasture in the spring; since “real” Americans paid for it, and remove all telecommunication systems. Not that I’m upset or anything.

  17. They are protesting the Civil War, apparently. As a life-long resident of Alabama, I have witnessed many displays of misguided politcal activism.

    Refusal to accept “facts” and “data” and “hocus pocus” is Tradition ’round these parts.

    It’s like they (we) try to be ignorant.

  18. in ist ein teabagger

    I’m converted, I’m converted!

    Heading off to a family gathering to cruise for chicks. If you’re reading this comment from your latte-sipping, union-constructed futon made of macrobiotic tofu – you FAIL!

    U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

  19. This is not a protest. This is performance artists recreating the bit referenced on Chatterbox from Grand Theft Auto 3:

    http://www.gamefaqs.com/console/ps2/file/466217/16584

    Lazlow: “So…what’s this rally about, Jeff?”
    Jeff: “It’s about people standing up and being counted. It’s about the
    future. It’s about telling those morons in the suits ‘no thanks!
    Not in my town! Not while I have a breath in my body and hope in
    my soul! I will not, I cannot let this pass!'”
    Lazlow: “Let what pass?”
    Jeff: “It’s about grabbing the town by the balls and saying ‘listen son,
    either put-up, or shut up! No more Mr. Nice-guy. No more easy
    solutions for difficult problems!’ It’s about what it means to be
    an American. It’s about giving something back.”
    Lazlow: “Giving what back, Jeff?”
    Jeff: “Hope! Dreams! Belief!”
    Lazlow: “Belief in what?!”

  20. [re=297223]Voyou Charmant[/re]: That’s a tough one. But right now I think it’s “the blacks”. Now that they have one of their own wielding the levers of Western domination, they can run interference for “the jews”, who like to operate in the background, where they can despoil the young, perfect fruit of “the whites” with their immoral left-wing media empires and hook-nosed acquisitiveness.

    Once again, I say it’s time for the cracker class to bail. Austria might put them up for awhile, as long as they did the menial labor–“Hospital corners, you fucking American!”.

  21. Similar stuff was said at the Seattle teafest – basically they were against Communism taking over America. I’m sure we can (mostly) all (mostly) agree with that. I hadn’t realised there was even a risk, to be honest.

    Oh, and don’t forget that “Reagan broke down the wall”, and we “don’t want to see it being rebuilt here”. I think that means that they don’t want the country separated into a communist East and a capitalist West and a wall being erected so the Easterners can’t escape to the West.

    Basically, they’re living in a different world, based around a Tom Clancy novel set in the 1970s.

  22. Don’t any of those rednecks have jobs?? I don’t have time to neatly shave my head everyday and wander from tea party to tea party, you know why? I’m at fuckin’ work. If I didn’t work and pay my taxes how would everyone in your family get their (obesity-related) disability checks?

  23. You tantalized us with promises of prizes last night, and what did we get. An earful of cider.

    BTW they are protesting the idea that people of color matter.

  24. Sniff… sniff… That video brought a tear to my eye. It gives me hope that by the time I’m old and gray, the white middle class might finally find a voice in the government. Sniff… some people say I’m a dreamer…

    WEEEE SHAAAAALL, OVERCOOOOOME!!!

  25. I have yet to figure out which of these mythical “rights” is being taken away from this group. As far as the noncoherent answers I have gotten from the few I have had the displeasure of meeting, it seems to be a mistaken notion that the Constitution has a rule that whomever they voted for automatically wins.

  26. Well, shoot, you know, I watched the entire Network movie, where that other madman galvanized all those angry citizens not to take it anymore and they were all yelling that out their windows, and never was their any attempt by any of them to define that anger.

    Let’s try. “I’m a mindless cretin and need somebody to blame that on!”

  27. Oh come on, you elitist Yanqui snobs. You know good n’ well what it is these salt-of-the-earth common folks (you know: morons) are protesting. It’s as plain as the Nigra in what we formerly knew as the WHITE House. Taxes schmaxes. By the way, I’m heartened to know that I’m not the only resident of Redneckistan to have wandered onto this site. Yep, Murfreesboro actually exists, and if you think Middle Tennessee looks appalling, multiply that by about two gazillion and you’ve got East Tennessee, the buckle on the goddam Bible Belt.

  28. [re=297271]Three Peckered Hoot Owl[/re]: It’s not simply enough to post a comment or to leer anonymously. You have to be prepared to take action. Hot, hot, tit-banging action.

  29. Aha!
    WASHINGTON – Then-national security adviser Condoleezza Rice verbally OK’d the CIA’s request to subject alleged al-Qaida terrorist Abu Zubaydah to waterboarding in July 2002, a decision memorialized a few days later in a secret memo that the Obama administration declassified last week.

    Rice’s role was detailed in a narrative released Wednesday by the Senate Intelligence Committee. It provides the most detailed timeline yet for how the CIA’s harsh interrogation program was conceived and approved at the highest levels in the Bush White House.

  30. [re=297267]El Pinche[/re]: christ on a crutch that was awesome. He was all sorts of worked up. I hope he makes fun of Glenn Beck’s crying jags again.

  31. “Federal takeover of the private sector”???!
    WTF?
    Am I the only person that saw the bailouts as a sign
    the private sector PWNZ teh gubernmint by strong-arming
    the taxpayers to pay off their debts?
    So, in all reality, these people are protesting the very
    institutions they love so much, which also happen to be the same institutions
    that fired their asses and took away their healthcare coverage because the
    corporations had a gambling problem.
    Sorry to b so srs.
    TRUKNUTZ BUTTSECKS ALSO FTW!!!!1

  32. I don’t fucking know, but all black people in the Murfreesboro metropolitan (har!) area, time to start gathering at each other’s homes with the menfolk taking shifts standing armed guard on the porch. Because these people want to go to there.

  33. [re=297130]Tommmcatt[/re]: You see sesesh has to be cleared away by the hand of God like the Yahudis of old. Now I will have to burn this teabag.

  34. [re=297234]Zadig[/re]: Sure, we keep Memphis; but we let Cincinnatti secede also then; except during Bengal playoff games. Oh, wait; that will never happen.

  35. [re=297246]Mr Blifil[/re]: “BTW they are protesting the idea that people of color matter.”

    That, in a f*cking twitter nutshell, is as well as I’ve ever seen it put.

  36. On second thought, this may have been the KKKick-off of a meeting by a certain group who normally holds secret get togethers where only certain kinds of folks get to “really know” what is going on. Wow, can I be any more vague, in a sort of careful way?

  37. [re=297291]Terry[/re]:
    Fashion Police! Teabag earrings BWAAAAAAAAAAAA! Motorcycle jacket with teabag surreptitiously hanging from front zipper = Federal Offense
    Teabaggers ball comedy gold FOREVER

  38. In 24 hours, these whackadoodles have turned me into a French Muslin. They are seceding? I am seceding. Puleaze no more bad USA, teabag, don’t tread on me, completely out of tune, tone deaf singing soliloquies of God & Country. P.S. Oh, & you can have Murfreesboro.

  39. I think they are upset that the Titans haven’t traded Vince Young.

    Today we are all teabagging Titans fans. Wait, that didn’t come out right.

  40. [re=297282]Hagar77[/re]: Yeah, but then that will be called an “insurrection” so the Mufreesboro chapter of the Stockton militia/police will have to regulate.

  41. Republicans are just learning how to be the dramatic minority party again. They know that they should be holding protesting or something, they just aren’t sure what to protest or how to do it.

  42. HOLY SHIT JESUS HELL. The brain is losing power. The shouting, the noise. This is like 9/11.
    TEABAGGERS CAUSED 9/11? This needs more cowbell. MORE. COWBELL.

  43. Wrong. They’re not protesting anything. They’re selling flags,flags made in China but dammit They’re American flags!

    Trucknutz also.

  44. “Do not let this enthusiasm die! Take it and spread it!”

    DON’T SPREAD ON ME

    *Why are all these dudes either super country or closet-gay and toting around a traditionally conceived proof of heteroability-baby?

  45. Honestly, can’t we just lop off the right? It’s beyond saving — covered in tumors, withered, useless, no feeling — it has sustained irreparable damage.

    If we just hack it off and all lean left I think we’d still make it; wouldn’t even miss it. Amputees do it, why not America?

    Alright, I see what you’re saying…but I’d happily trade the legalization of marijuana for the legalization of dumb-hunting.

  46. I still can’t figure out what these fine, upstanding, democrat hating, gun loving, FOX ‘news’ sucking, patriotic Americans are trying to say other than that they are pissed that their guys lost, badly, in the last two elections.
    Welcome to America. (USA)Love it or leave it.
    Does that ring a bell, bitters?

  47. [re=297279]hobgoblin of little minds[/re]: Shep must be agitating the shit out of Roger Aisle’s hemorrhoids.
    I don’t think Shep wants his contract renewed next time.

  48. To answer the sign shown @ 1:14 — yes, yes you do look like a terrorist. Also you are terrorizing me with your accent. I am from Texas. I didn’t think people could sound stupider than some folk here. I was wrong. Can’t = ‘caint’ oh god that makes my ears bleed.

    No I do not know what they are protesting.

    Oh wait, yes I do. Our president is a colored.

  49. OMFG I’m a long time reader and a first time poster. Jesus Fucking Christ on a popsicle stick… all this “We surround them” and “Silent Majority” bullshit needs to choke on a fat dick. If you were the majority, wouldn’t you have won the election by a majority *CHRIST ON A CHEETO* of votes??

  50. DOWN WITH THIS SORT OF THING!
    CAREFUL NOW.

    [re=297132]wheelie[/re]: I am willing to be flexible about the “take it and spread it” message. Also.

  51. These are the same people who think that, as Christians, they are constantly discriminated against in America. Other than that, they’re Perotistas, who are against government spending, period. They claim it’s because of the borrowing, but they’re really just cheapskates who don’t understand how the world works; if we were running big surpluses, they’d still be bitching about the spending (they did that in Clinton’s last year, and used it as a reason to vote for BUSH).

  52. Oh God help me. Yes Murfreesboro exists, and it every bit as shitty as you would think from this little glipse of its residents. As a northerner living in Nashville, let me give you the state in a nutshell: Nashville is so full of yankee trasplants that it went 60-40% for Hopey and may as well be in Connecticut but for the occasional hickish outcropping. Even our mayor is from Boston. Memphis has teh blacks and lots of liberals to temper the rednecks and is perfectly acceptable until you get to the suburbs. They even elected a wildly liberal Jew to Congress. The rest of the state, from the cotton fields to the mountains, is fucking Murfreesboro.

  53. [re=297438]Homo Superior[/re]:
    Welcome.
    So you don’t get the hate from the bitters?
    Who does?
    Except for the bitters, Who just don’t get it in general….

  54. Hey, you in the yellow “Tennessee” sweater – Yeah you, numb nuts. Read this carefully:

    The reason the Federal Government is “becoming involved in the private sector” is because the clowns who run Wall Street (that great bastion of Free Market Capitalism), having squandered their shareholders’ capital and produced enough bad paper to cover every office wall in Manhattan, came to DC and begged the President to do so, in order to prevent the entire financial shithouse which is your Economy falling down upon them (and, indirectly you), brick by brick.

    The aforementioned clowns were able to create this situation predominantly because of a blithering idiot named George W. Bush Jr. (you remember him, don’t you? You probably voted for him- Twice). He believed that financial markets simply don’t require any regulation, audit or oversight, and simply stood by the Oval Office window for eight years fiddling (with that arrogant smirk on his face) while everyone from the tea lady (not a Teabagger) to Warren Buffett tried to tell him that Rome was burning.

    We may not agree with all the measures President Obama is taking, but he is like a man standing in his front yard with a shovel, confronted by a mountain of dog shit the size of Mt. Everest, kindly left behind by the previous occupants. If you are not willing to pitch in and help with the clean-up, please at least have the decency to SHUT.THE.FUCK.UP.

  55. I’m not up on the latest variations on the Gay Handkerchief Code, but surely hanging a teabag on the left side of your leather jacket just screams “Urine!”

  56. I guess it was the bumpy landing from their spaceship and the rude awakening from the sleep chamber of the last 8 years when our little friends let silly mr. cheney read their emails, spy on them, arrest them without cause, and generally use the Constitution as his personal cigarette. Suddenly they feel that the spirit of Dan’l Boone is telling them to dust off their coonskin caps and get into their Alamo outfits and fight……what? Well, something, whatever it is, that’s whut!

  57. [re=297498]lazyb[/re]: All non-Tennesseans really need to know about our fine state is that there is currently a bill in the state legislature, which will make it legal to carry concealed guns in bars. I’m sure there won’t be ANY unintended consequences to that, no sir. We’re mad classy, ’round here.

  58. i’ve had it with the “we’re not here as dems or repubs” bullshit. WE know that you’re here because you lost an election (after stealing two). things that are self-evident need no explanation “fair and balanced” etc. even these buckets of scab juice must understand this simple truth at some level.

  59. Just checked out wikipedia for murpheesboro; 5 of the top 7 employers are government agencies. Wow, talk about biting the teabag that feeds their full, moist inner parts.

  60. Oh hell. As a transplanted Memphian now living in greater Wingnuttia Raptureville, east Tennessee, these bitches need to be protesting the over consumption of moon pies. The dumbass-ity of my home state gives me continual comic relief. The other day I was in a gas station/convenient store that sells, Jug ‘o’ Milk (wtf?). The one toothed person behind the counter was commenting on the current price of cigarettes. He was pontificating to his fellow toothly impaired patrons that , ‘tha muslim has raised cigarette taxes so that we can pay for the Mexicans to get free healthcare’.
    Shit. Now I’m fucked, because I thought the tax increase was to replace all the Gideon’s bibles in Motel 6’s with the annotated Koran. That was the whole reason I started smoking this month. I’m clearly a gettin mah information from the wrong convenience store.

  61. [re=297306]chascates[/re]: The only part of the US Constitution these ass-clowns care about is th’ Secund Amendmunt.
    “Yool nevuh take mah peni-uhhh, ah meen gun!”

Comments are closed.

Previous article
Next articleShep Smith ‘Goes Rogue’ Again, Loudly, Profanely, Heroically