Some of us have been on vacation since Wednesday, at the delightful Beach, but how could we miss Sarah Palin’s latest cosmic sack o’ lies and demons and terror? Watch her “I’m going to resign because governing a state is hard when you have absolutely no interest in governing a state” speech, it is packed with funnies. We are sobbing. There are evil monsters screeching in the background. And Piper’s feet itch! [YouTube]

Sam the American Eagle was, of course, both the first blogger and the first warblogger, a creature so deeply patriotic that he figured out how to make his youtubes only appear on the American Wide Web. Yes, it’s almost the three-day Holiday Weekend, so let’s enjoy some cheap video clips to make us want to move to Canada all over again. MORE »

Watching this weirdly edited video clip makes us feel like we just downed a coffee mug full of Liquid Vicodin, but perhaps you people will get something deeper, or maybe your heads will explode, just like poor Al Franken’s … or, Senator Al Franken’s head, right? [The Connecticut Forum]

Well, this is sort of what we all imagined, in our darkest & drunkest moments. Here’s a Fox News show featuring a weird jabbering middle-aged baby with hair plugs on the left side of the screen and some guy who claims to be a Bush Administration-era anti-Bin Laden agent on the right, and, well, they both share a certain dream for America, which involves the nation being horribly attacked by Osama bin Laden’s secret arsenal of nuclear weapons, from Mexico. THAT WILL LEARN US, RIGHT? MORE »

The look on these anchors’ faces at 0:33 might rank among the greatest YouTube freeze-frames of some period of time. [Las Vegas Gleaner]

The last time a cell phone rang during a White House press conference, Robert Gibbs just took that damned device and gave it to the CIA, for torture. But Barack Obama is too cool for that. He just looks disappointed, with America, and then jokes about how pathetic the White House correspondents are, to be downloading duck ringtones. Oh and this is some kind of talk to the gays? [Gawker/YouTube]

Okay thanks a lot to Wonkette Operative “Phil” for sending this with the subject line, “OBAMA DOG SEX TAPE??!” This is the official Monday Night Open Thread, go nuts!

You may have viewed this film on other Internet blogs, but if not, prepare to cry. We have attempted several times in the past week to write about all of the mean news journalists — chiefly Dana Milbank, a dreadful clown — accusing HuffPo’s Nico Pitney of asking Barack Obama a “planted question,” from the Iran, but it gets us all hot and bothered, so just watch the fun video, right up there. [YouTube]

At Tuesday’s Obama Press Conference, CBS’ Chip Reid wanted Obama to admit that Lindsey Graham and John McCain were finally knocking some sense into his weak skull about how he needed to yell at/bomb Iran some more. America aids its friends of course! And even though Obama only kicked up his rhetoric a half-degree or so on Tuesday, Ahmadinejad was very quick to condemn America’s meddling. So today all Chip Reid wanted to know was why this idiot Obama would speak so recklessly about Iran’s internal politics — doesn’t he know anything about international relations?? [YouTube]

This young man from Louisiana calls himself “Hurricane Chris.” The Internet tells us that he is famous among children for a rap song called “Halle Berry (She’s Fine),” the lyrics of which praise the actress’ Oscar-winning turn in the film Monster’s Ball. Recently he put on a concert for the Louisiana legislature. Hmm. [Political Derby]