Tag Archives: youtube

  Jonesin' For Hillary

Wingnut Alex Jones And Troll Army Declare WAR On Toymaker For Selling Hillary Clinton Dolls

Made with the latest in molded pantsuit technology
Jason Feinberg isn’t a political junkie. Sure, he follows politics in general. He votes. And in 2008. his little toy and novelty manufacturing outfit, FCTRY in Brooklyn, had something of a hit with a Barack Obama action figure, which sold around 200,000 units and allowed him to quit teaching high school English to be a full-time entrepreneur guy. But he doesn’t follow the political blogosphere with the obsessiveness of a Wonketteer, so he had no idea who “Alex Jones” was until he found himself being yelled at by the guy during a Skype interview for Jones’s Infowars.com. last week, then getting an email box full of anti-Semites accusing him of advancing the New World Order. Well, how did he get there? Read more on Wingnut Alex Jones And Troll Army Declare WAR On Toymaker For Selling Hillary Clinton Dolls…
  Toxic Sludge Is Good For You; I'm Just Not Thirsty

Monsanto Fanboy: Weed Killer Safe Enough To Drink. F*ck No, I Won’t Drink It. (Updated)

Je ne suis certainement un énorme trou du cul, mais je ne suis pas stupide
Updated: see end of post. So here’s a thing of beauty: Chemical industry lobbyist apologist Patrick Moore wants to assure the world there is absolutely no truth to the pernicious assertions that glyphosate, the active ingredient in Monsanto’s Roundup herbicide, is harmful to humans. In an interview for a documentary on French television station Canal +, Moore denies that glyphosate has led to increased cancer rates in Argentina, because such a thing is simply UNPOSSIBLE. How safe is the stuff? Just watch! (Don’t be askeered by the French subtitles; the interview is in English.) Read more on Monsanto Fanboy: Weed Killer Safe Enough To Drink. F*ck No, I Won’t Drink It. (Updated)…
  so long farewell

Harry Reid Retiring To Let Someone Else Lead Senate Democrats To Defeat For A Change

Sooooooooo mean!
After insisting that he would absolutely seek re-election in 2016, Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid released a video and statement reminding us, in case we’d forgotten, that he used to be an amateur boxer — oh, and also, he will not seek re-election after all. Read more on Harry Reid Retiring To Let Someone Else Lead Senate Democrats To Defeat For A Change…
  why don't we get drunk and ... nope

Here Is John Boehner, Too Drunk To F*ck (Video)

Award-winning journalist (lol) Chuck C. Johnson has been promising us many SCOOPS this week! While we are still waiting on pins and needles and tenterhooks and fishbaits to find out which conservative politician’s CAREER Chuck is going to END with booby-grabbing revelations (IS IT BOB PACKWOOD????), we do have this sideways cell phone camera video of a man Chuck says is John Boehner, though there is no way to really know, come to think of it, slurring THE FUCK outta some names of some colleges. Read more on Here Is John Boehner, Too Drunk To F*ck (Video)…
  Just Don't Make This A Racial Thing OK?

Michigan Cops Had Perfectly Good Reason For Beating Up Unarmed Black Guy, Probably

Funny, not one working microphone, either.
Surprising news from Michigan: On Jan. 28, police in the Detroit suburb of Inkster were caught on dashcam dragging an African American man from his car, putting him in a chokehold, then repeatedly beating and tasering him because, they say, he was resisting arrest. We were surprised to learn that there’s a Detroit suburb named “Inkster.” Read more on Michigan Cops Had Perfectly Good Reason For Beating Up Unarmed Black Guy, Probably…
 

Colorado Rep. Klingenschmitt: God Hates Bortions, So He Killed A Baby. That’ll Show Us!

This whole story is just...ick
You sort of have to admire the mind of Gordon “Dr. Chaps” Klingenschmitt, the Colorado Internet preacher who somehow got elected to the state House. No matter what horrible thing happens, Klingenschmitt finds a way to attribute it to either demons, God’s anger over abortion and/or The Gays, or some combination thereof. Which explains how he managed to take the news of a horrific attack on a pregnant Colorado woman and explain that it’s just God’s wrath on America for allowing abortion to be legal. Read more on Colorado Rep. Klingenschmitt: God Hates Bortions, So He Killed A Baby. That’ll Show Us!…
  Take A Cruz On Denial

Now It Is Ted Cruz Who Is Poor Persecuted Galileo, And Climate Scientists Are The Church

Get your denier bingo cards out!
In a bravura performance Tuesday, Ted Cruz crammed an astonishing number of lies about global warming into four minutes of a longer interview with Texas Tribune reporter Jay Root. It was really pretty impressive! Cruz asserted that “we should follow the science and follow the evidence” on climate change, and then proceeded to reel off a whole catalogue of distortions, half-truths, and outright lies that have been refuted again and again. He hit just about every space on the Climate Denial Bingo card; for the sake of our sanity, we won’t refute everything he said, just some of our favorite stretchers. Read more on Now It Is Ted Cruz Who Is Poor Persecuted Galileo, And Climate Scientists Are The Church…
  Remember The Alahomo

Gay-Hatin’ Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore Ready To Be Martyred At The Straight-People Alamo

Yes, this really exists
Ten Commandments Hero Chief Justice Roy Moore came from Alabama with a Brawndo on his knee t’other day, visiting the Lone Star State Monday to address a very important “Defense of Texas Marriage Amendment Rally,” where he said that he is willing to lay down his very life to stop people with the wrong combinations of genitals from entering into marriage contracts. Also, he is worried about all the hyperbole and exaggeration in the world today. Read more on Gay-Hatin’ Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore Ready To Be Martyred At The Straight-People Alamo…
  Load Up On Guns And Bring Your Friends -- Again

Ted Cruz Loves Good Old Country Music Because 9/11 And Also Pandering

‘John, let’s do a shot for the warden.’ And for the junior Senator from Texas.
Now this is some carefully targeted pandering! In an interview with CBS This Morning, Ted Cruz explained that the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, completely changed his taste in music, apparently because classic rock failed to meet his anger needs: Read more on Ted Cruz Loves Good Old Country Music Because 9/11 And Also Pandering…
  Rick Management

Florida State Senators Taunt Emergency Chief: You Ain’t Allowed To Say ‘Climate Change’!

love the audience reaction here
Florida’s Senate had entirely too much fun taunting Gov. Rick Scott’s head of emergency management last week, trying to get Bryan Koon to say the words “climate change,” which, as we all know, is a Banned Word of Power in Florida’s executive branch these days. And who can blame them? Who wouldn’t love the chance to make the guy squirm, knowing that he has orders — even though of course Scott says there’s no ban on the words. Really? Then why won’t you say those words, Mr. Koon? You know the words. SAY THE WORDS. Read more on Florida State Senators Taunt Emergency Chief: You Ain’t Allowed To Say ‘Climate Change’!…
  Looks Like I Picked The Wrong Day To Stop Sniffing Glue

TSA Let A Known Terrorist Fly. Who Was It, Besides Obama?

Langley, are you SURE this guy had I.D.?
Today’s big Air Travel Freakout is that the Transportation Security Agency apparently allowed someone very bad to board a commercial airliner last year, and they let the very bad person board without taking his very bad shoes off, even though he (or she! feminism!) was recognized by a TSA officer, triple exclamation points!!! Read more on TSA Let A Known Terrorist Fly. Who Was It, Besides Obama?…
  Earworm Warning

CNN Does Funny Thing On Purpose (Watch Your Political ‘Too Many Cooks’ Here Please Thank You You’re Welcome)

Don't expect too much sense out of this one. It's Friday, roll with it.
Guys, we don’t quite know how to tell you this, but CNN actually did something funny. We mean, intentionally. How did this happen? What are the larger implications for cable television news, viral videos, the 2016 elections, and social media? What is this thing anyway? On the off chance that you haven’t seen the original, here it is, as well as the Wikipedia entry, like that would help. Or better, just watch the thing and bathe in its majestic glory: Read more on CNN Does Funny Thing On Purpose (Watch Your Political ‘Too Many Cooks’ Here Please Thank You You’re Welcome)…
  Next: The Inevitable Drunken Make-Up Sex

Glenn Beck Breaks Up With GOP, Won’t Return Any LPs They Bought Together

Who'll get custody of the Butthurt?
Oh dear. This is going to make for some awkward Thanksgiving dinners, we bet: Glenn Beck is done with the Republican Party because he just can’t stand how they keep cheating on him. On his radio programme Wednesday, Mr. Beck told the GOP that it’s not him, it’s them: Read more on Glenn Beck Breaks Up With GOP, Won’t Return Any LPs They Bought Together…
  Still Better With Kids Than Cheney. The Screams Haunt Us To This Day

Ted Cruz Now Terrifying Small Children In Person

This is not the disco inferno we were looking for
Watch out, Wonkers, it may very well be Ted Cruz day at Yr Wonkette. No, come back! We’ll have kittens later, maybe. Old Bile and Backpfeifengesicht was doing a Town Hall thing in New Hampshire Sunday when he used a metaphor that was just a little scary to a small girl in the audience. We’re talking little child, being held by her mom. Read more on Ted Cruz Now Terrifying Small Children In Person…
  The Thin Blue Lyin'

BREAKING: Cop Actually Stopped Other Cops From Beating Guy Up! (Then Got Fired.)

Why would you ever want to stop a good beatdown?
It took a couple of years, but there’s finally been a bit of justice done in Bogota, New Jersey, where a judge has ordered the police department to reinstate, with back pay, Regina Tasca, a genuinely good cop who was fired in 2012 after stopping two fellow officers, who were fellows, from beating the living crap out of a mentally ill man who only needed to be taken to a hospital. Instead of getting a commendation for excellence in serving the community, Tasca was suspended and ultimately fired for being “psychologically unfit.” Here’s what happened back in 2012: Read more on BREAKING: Cop Actually Stopped Other Cops From Beating Guy Up! (Then Got Fired.)…
  Ground Control To Major Ted

Hero Ted Cruz Will Save Us All From NASA Studying Our Climate

JPL'S Orbiting Carbon Observatory 2
Ted Cruz is pretty darn annoyed with NASA these days, seeing as how it’s just been wasting a lot of taxpayer money studying the climate and foolishness like that. For heaven’s sake, everyone knows that NASA is supposed to be about space, and there is no climate in space. And that’s why he was ready to give a good talking-to to NASA Administrator Charles Bolden about all these stupid satellites that NASA has looking down at boring old Earth and its atmosphere and oceans, instead of looking out at other, more interesting things that are far away. So Cruz, who chairs the subcommittee that oversees NASA, kicked off a hearing last Thursday by asking Bolden just why NASA is ignoring its key mission of doing science to things that won’t cause problems for the fossil fuel industry. Read more on Hero Ted Cruz Will Save Us All From NASA Studying Our Climate…
  Billo's Seen Cops Shot Too

Oh, NOW Bill O’Reilly Thinks Irresponsible Words Can Inspire Violence

Call him irresponsible...and he will DESTROY YOU.
Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.com Bill O’Reilly would just like to see a little more responsibility on the part of the media in how they cover sensitive issues, because as he’s recently discovered, language can have consequences! In a piece on the shootings of two police officers in Ferguson early Thursday morning, O’Reilly explained the link between violent words and violent deeds: “As we saw here in New York City, inflammatory rhetoric can get police officers killed.” You know, violent rhetoric like telling your black son that he needs to be extra careful around the police, or saying that police shouldn’t be shooting black people quite so often. Read more on Oh, NOW Bill O’Reilly Thinks Irresponsible Words Can Inspire Violence…
  epic fail

Let’s Point And Laugh At Ted Cruz Trying To ‘Joke’ And Failing Miserably. For Fun!

President Ted Cruz (R-Not Really)
Here is a video of Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Needs New Material) trying to charm the International Association of Fire Fighters in Dallas this week, with some jokes! Apparently, conservatives eat up this crap and cheer and thump their chests and say “Oooh, Cruz for president!” A firefighters’ union, though? Not so much: Read more on Let’s Point And Laugh At Ted Cruz Trying To ‘Joke’ And Failing Miserably. For Fun!…
  Here have some news n stuff

Conservatives Aren’t Happier Than Liberals After All, But They Are Liars. It’s Science!

Typical conservative
We all know what the studies say, right? Conservatives get dumber every time they watch Fox News. Liberals get unhappier every time they roll out of bed in their mom’s basement and smoke a bowl for brunch. If conservatives would stop praying for whores outside abortion clinics, they might know some things that are actually true. And if liberals would embrace Ronald Reagan as their personal lord and savior, they’d be all smiley faces and happy dancing. But oh! What is this? It’s another study, and it does not bode well for our conservative “friends,” bless their sad shriveled hearts: Read more on Conservatives Aren’t Happier Than Liberals After All, But They Are Liars. It’s Science!…
  Maybe More Guns Would Help?

Fox News: Eric Holder Really Should NOT Have Shot Those Cops In Ferguson!

The other chyron for the story: 'Street Justice: Police officers shot in wake of DOJ Report'
While two police officers were still hospitalized after being shot in Ferguson, Missouri, early Thursday morning (they have since been released), and police have no suspects, Fox News and other rightwing sources have identified the true culprits: Attorney General Eric Holder and everyone who’s ever protested against police brutality. Read more on Fox News: Eric Holder Really Should NOT Have Shot Those Cops In Ferguson!…
  Not Helping Not At All

Two Police Officers Shot In Ferguson, Wingnuts Certain Shots Came From White House

Nothing all that funny
Two police officers were shot in front of the Ferguson, Missouri, police department early Thursday morning. The shootings occurred hours after Wednesday’s resignation of police chief Tom Jackson, as protesters near the police department called for additional resignations in Ferguson city government. One officer was shot in the face, the other in the shoulder. Both were hospitalized with injuries that were described as very serious but not life-threatening. The shootings occurred shortly after midnight as the protests appeared to be breaking up. Read more on Two Police Officers Shot In Ferguson, Wingnuts Certain Shots Came From White House…