August is a miserably hot month that serves no purpose other than to remind us a) that we wasted June and July and b) that we should probably do something valuable with our lives. We don’t even get any holidays — it’s just a harbinger of bad things to come, like the end of summer. So, we have made it our DUTY to bring some semblance of meaning to this otherwise unimportant month, but so far all we’ve come up with is YOU using August to relax and get in touch with your soul via … yoga. MORE »

* Lovely nutshell: “How wrong would it be to make yoga a higher priority than an anti-war rally?” [Grateful Dating]
* If you’re going to the protest but don’t have any friends, this is probably a better than rollerblading around the Mall in circles. [DCDL]
* When you buy an entree from California Tortilla today say “spatula.” [Prod & Ponder]
* Metro is getting new, square tiles for reasons not entirely clear. [Solar Kismet]
* Happy Anniversary to why.i.hate.dc. Anonymous commenter helps Rusty celebrate: “You and this blog suck. Get funny or get the fuck off the internet.” [why.i.hate.dc]

To be happy, healthy and flexible after giving birth to a gay baby, you’ll need to dismay conservatives and get the Hot Nude Yoga four-disc set.

• Heard on the Hill: Sen. Tom Coburn (R-Okla.) says “Condoms and teenagers work about 50 percent of the time.” [Roll Call]
• Lowdown: John Edwards and Russell Simmons got sweaty at the Jivamukti Yoga School in NY, continued on to Downtown Cipriani where they “discussed spirituality, how to end poverty, the higher self and other inspirational topics.” [NYDN]
• Page Six: Rudy Giuliani drinks 12-year-old Macallan scotches, tips 22 percent, is friends with Lindsay Lohan. [NYP]

Friday

• We Fought The Big One at Marx Cafe. “A monthly celebration of moody & off-kilter post-punk, shoegaze and left-of-center underground independent music!” Alcian Blue’s Jake Reid joins the DJ’s. Free from 10PM-3AM. [We Fought The Big One on MySpace]

• New NE novelty bar Palace of Wonders hosts grand opening party tonight and tomorrow night. It’s getting really hyped up, but beware, as WashPo’s Adriane Quinlan said, it’s: “cluttered like a freakshow TGI Friday’s.” $15 at 8PM. [Palace of Wonders]

Saturday

• Bluestate at the Black Cat. Way better to have a music blogger DJ than some IDM raver, we guess. Fluxblog’s Matthew Perpetua DJ’s backstage at the Black Cat. Free at 9:30PM. [Black Cat]

• The Ister, a documentary about the influence of Martin Heidegger at the National Gallery. Variety calls it: “A veritable philosophical feast.” Free at 2PM. [National Gallery]
• Last weekend of the Smithsonian Folklife Festival features The Dixie Cups and Davell Crawford, among others. [Folklife Festival]

Sunday

• Camera Obscura at the Black Cat. $12 at 8:30PM. [Black Cat]

• D.C. Men’s Naked Yoga. “A safe, nonsexual environment for men to enjoy the health benefits of yoga practiced naked with certified instructors.” [WashBlade]
• Tokyo’s Puffy Ami Yumi at 9:30 Club. “Puffy are a contemporary female version of the Monkees with the popularity of ‘N Sync and the homage/theft approach of ’90s pop-recombinant cult heroes the Pooh Sticks.” $25 at 6PM. [9:30]