Wonkette

Our last, best hope for Washington — that it would be destroyed by the horrible emergence of subterranean monstrosities — came tantalizingly close to reality on Tuesday, when a magnitude 2.0 earthquake shook the D.C. area. What was it, and why is the government claiming and then denying responsibility for the loud booms from Beneath the Earth? MORE »

There are so many events at the White House. Why, just the other day a local high-school band played for the First Lady. And WTOP political commentator Mark Plotkin was on the scene! He asked Laura Bush a weird question and was promptly escorted away from the White House, which he was already leaving, or something. See if you can make any sense of it. MORE »

A horrific, bloody battle between a rural Maryland family and a rabies-crazed black bear was unwittingly exploited to make a point about gun control laws in D.C., an examination of comments left of WTOP-AM’s website revealed today. MORE »

Meet Wonkette’s new favorite Baptist preacher and Christian Radio deejay, 58-year-old Tommy Tester of Bristol, Virginia. He was just hanging out at a car wash, in Tennessee, drunk and high, wearing a skirt, “relieving himself in front of children,” with an open bottle of vodka and an empty oxycodone prescription sitting in the car. Oh, and he was “offering police officers oral sex.” MORE »

Is there anybody who actually believes DC Madam Deborah Jeane Palfrey didn’t run a high-priced prostitution service? Of course not, but Palfrey’s lawyers have been using the pretty clever strategy of asking the powerful Republican clients of her sex-delivery company if they paid for sex. And barring a scientifically impossible moment of honesty from one of the johns, none of them will ever admit to hiring a hooker. MORE »

Toe-sucking whore renter Dick Morris has apparently denied being a client of DC Madam Deborah Jean Palfrey’s prostitution service, according to an AP correction:

In a March 9 story about a former escort service owner pleading not guilty to racketeering, The Associated Press erroneously reported that political consultant Dick Morris acknowledged being a client. Morris said the claim is “totally untrue.” A corrected version appears below.

But Palfrey says — in a letter posted today on WTOP’s website — that Morris repeatedly admitted to being a client. Where did he do the admitting? Palfrey says “on numerous occasions on national television, in 1996.” MORE »