Tag: wtf

Florida Man In Prostitution Sting Offered To Pay For Sex With A Salad

My vegetable love should grow Vaster than empires, and more slow -- Andrew Marvel, "To His Coy Mistress" Can we just assume that Alonzo Liverman (yes, that is actually his name, in actual fact) is just a really poetic...

Hero Thief Saves ’70s Gay-Hater Anita Bryant’s Neighbors From Hell Of Having To Look At Crappy Statue

An unspeakably ugly one-ton statue has been stolen from the home of former Miss Oklahoma, orange juice peddler, and anti-gay activist Anita Bryant in Oklahoma City. The $30,000 lump of marble was taken May 25th, although Oklahoma TV station...

Deleted Comments Of The Day: How Dare You Call Bundy Ranch Freedom Warriors Names, You Pig Bitch?

The ol' comment queue is in need of a good hosing-out, so let's see what detritus is in there. Looks like our stories on the Cletus Cliven Bundy and the Big Cattle Freedom Uprising generated a lot of interest...

NSA Knew All About Heartbleed, Didn’t Want to Spoil the Surprise for You

From the How Is This Not Front Page News In Every Paper In The Country? Files, Bloomberg brings us the tale of how our good friends at the National Security Agency (hi guys!) have known about Heartbleed— a critical Internet...

Charming Oklahoma Restaurant Takes You Back To Pre-1960s Birmingham (Video)

Well! Here's a charming little local business in Enid, Oklahoma, run by a "real character": Gary's Chicaros restaurant and bar, run by one Gary James, who doesn't deny that he throws out any patrons he doesn't like the looks...

Glenn Beck, Private Dick

Idiot Savant Auteur de Merde Glenn Beck presents this short Noir masterpiece about a guy named Lucky, a legless (or one-legged, because why would you check your script for consistency?) prostitute named Charlie, and a slick grifter named Sam,...

The Daily Show: Larry Wilmore Awards Outstanding Achievements In Racial WTF-ery

To mark a year that saw the Voting Rights Act overturned because it's outdated at the same time that states made it harder for people to vote, here's The Daily Show's Larry Wilmore to recognize some outstanding accomplishments in...

Rob Ford Has Entered Full Andy Kaufman Mode

A new video of performance artist/Toronto Mayor Rob Ford has surfaced; in the video, reportedly taken Monday night at a Toronto fast-food establishment, the very drunk mayor rambles and says many swears in both English and in Jamaican patois....

James Inhofe: Don’t Extend Unemployment Benefits, Because God Is in Charge Of Climate Change (Which Is Fake)

Listen up, heathens. Oklahoma Sen. James Inhofe just needs to explain a thing or two to you people who think we need to extend emergency unemployment benefits that ended December 28. He has just two words that explain why...

Bradlee Dean Thinks New York Public Schools Are Teaching Kids To Do Sex With Animals

Oh, golly, you know sometimes Yr Doktor Zoom goes a few weeks or more without encountering the odd mental oscillations of Wonkette frenemy Bradlee Dean, who keeps failing to sue us so we can get all his money. We...

For This Beautiful Holiday, Dinesh D’Souza Makes Us Thankful We Are Not Dinesh D’Souza

Twitter is, of course, the place where people go to embarrass themselves in public. That's just part of the day-to-day background noise. Throw in a national holiday, and you get all sorts of beautiful new opportunities to be an...

Strange Man On Horse Yells About Impeaching Obama (Video)

From the tipline, here is a gentleman doing a bit of 300 cosplay whilst muttering something about the need to impeach Obama. He is "Leonidas, from the past," and he explains that he did not die, but is old....

North Carolina Cops Interfere In Foster Parents’ Innovative Dead-Chicken-Based Discipline Program

In Monroe, North Carolina, Dorian Lee Harper and Wanda Sue Larson were arrested Friday and charged with child abuse after a deputy found their 11-year-old foster child handcuffed to the couple's front porch. With a dead chicken tied around...

Killer Typhoons, Low-Information Congressmen, And Giant Snakes, All In This Week’s Sci-Blog

Hola, Wonketeers! It's time once again for another frighteningly disturbing Wonkette Sci-Blog. Help yourselves to a bowl of ayahuasca and come on in! Whew! I've finally gotten all cleaned up and straightened out from another year's Halloween. It's truly a...

House GOP No Longer The Craziest People In The House

Just to add that perfect little soupçon of WTF to the end of the Dumbest Government Shutdown In History, the House vote to reopen the government and extend the debt ceiling was interrupted by the House stenographer completely losing...

Texas Rep. John Culberson Wants To Do 9/11 On Obamacare, For Freedom

On Saturday, when House Republicans voted to make funding the government contingent on a one-year delay in implementing the Affordable Care Act, Texas congresscritter John Culberson (R-Derp) had the perfect words to inspire his colleagues. "I said, like 9/11,...