Tag Archives: world net daily

  but god is a socialist

Michele Bachmann Will Be President BUT ONLY If God Orders Her To

Important World Net Daily provocateur Drew Zahn has written the puff piece from Hell about psychotic Minnesota Monster Michele Bachmann, and you must read it, to be informed about politics. The fappery begins like so: “She began her political career simply, as a Christian mom concerned about the content of school papers her children brought home in their backpacks, but today she has become one of the leading defenders of liberty and conservative principles on Capitol Hill.” You had us at “Christian mom,” Zahn! But anyway, when will she be president? Read more on Michele Bachmann Will Be President BUT ONLY If God Orders Her To…
  in wikipedia we trust

Wingnut Birthers Think Wikipedia Is a Living Entity With Conflicted Beliefs

In the simple reptilian brain of the common wingnut-birther, Wikipedia is not a user-generated database that anyone can edit — it is, in fact, a wondrous sentient word monster created by God. But God’s creations are often stupid and vulgar, so it’s no wonder that Wikipedia has been pretty conflicted about this whole “Obama’s birth certificate” thing pooped out by the same angry white working-class culture that successfully convinced America the moon landing never happened. Read more on Wingnut Birthers Think Wikipedia Is a Living Entity With Conflicted Beliefs…
 

Save Jesus’ Birthday with Bumper Stickers

Conservative thingy WorldNetDaily.com is launching the anti-War on Christmas extra early this year, lest “the American Civil Liberties Union grinches” kidnap and neuter Santa Claus while his minions aren’t watching. Its website hosts an exclusive store for atheist-repelling paraphernalia. Among the items are a magnetic bumper sticker, a magnetic bumper sticker, an “auto magnet,” a magnetic bumper sticker, a Jesus bracelet and a magnetic bumper sticker. Those are all of the items, in fact, but inflatable green-and-red Bill O’Reilly fuckdolls should be available November 1. Because if they aren’t, Jesus will be retroactively unborn. Christmas-defense kit [WorldNetDaily] Read more on Save Jesus’ Birthday with Bumper Stickers…
 

World Net Daily Really Rooting For Nuclear War

News website World Net Daily apparently wrote about how Wonkette was mean to Tony Snow, even though Wonkette only wished him a full & speedy recovery. But some of the comments on the post were not so kind. So we’re The Devil or something. What else are they worked up about over at WND? Well, they want to tell you the exciting good news about the upcoming nuclear fucking war! Check it out, after the nuclear jump. Read more on World Net Daily Really Rooting For Nuclear War…
 

Dollar Fall Just Excuse For Bush To Merge Mexico & USA

The collapse of the U.S. dollar means more than $9 cups of coffee in Europe — it means the complete destruction of the United States! According to World Net Daily, the dollar disaster will provide the cover George W. Bush needs to quickly trash the USA and form a North American Union with Mexico and, perhaps, Canada. This awful new place will even have a sinister, Mexican-sounding name: Amero. Read more on Dollar Fall Just Excuse For Bush To Merge Mexico & USA…
 

Crazy Person: Soy Will Turn You Gay

If you’ve been on the internet today, someone has forwarded you this charming World Net Daily editorial on how the communists are sapping our precious bodily fluids through soy. Making fun of it is pretty much out of the question, not because everyone else has already had a crack at at, but because the damn headline is “A devil food is turning our kids into homosexuals.” That is not a Babel Fish translation. Read more on Crazy Person: Soy Will Turn You Gay…
 

Political Fundraising Metaphors Are Becoming Distressingly Literal

It’s one of the oldest cliches in politics, and this year it seems like it’s never been more true: As Jessica Simpson goes, so goes the Nation. Jessica Simpson snubs Bush‘It’s never been a problem for Bono,’ NRCC spokesman responds[…]Although Simpson’s publicists insisted she never had planned to attend the fund-raiser, Forti said the actress initially accepted the NRCC invitation when it was extended on Tuesday night, only to change her mind the next evening. Forti said the Republican group had even arranged for Simpson to dine at one of the head tables with House Majority Leader John Boehner, an Ohio Republican. The NRCC hopes the $2,500-per-plate dinner event will raise $7.5 million for Republican candidates in the congressional midterm elections in November. Read more on Political Fundraising Metaphors Are Becoming Distressingly Literal…
 

The Color of Money is Pink

The wingnutty World Net Daily gets hysterical about homos today, decrying how “Corporate America cuddles up to ‘gays’.” Well, that is sweet. But also kind of scary: These businesses, according to WND, “[p]ro-homosexual giants.” What size queens! Anyway, you can let them know what you think with a, er, poll: “BENDING OVER BACKWARDS — What do you make of Corporate America’s move to become ‘gay’-friendly?” If they really want to be friendly, perhaps they should try bending over forwards instead? Read more on The Color of Money is Pink…