workers
Elizabeth Warren Will Give Us All The Moneys Now
Wait. Did you hear that? That was the sound of us fluttering with delight as we watched Elizabeth Warren at the Senate Committee on Health, Education, Labor and Pensions hearing while she calmly explained how badly the American people are getting boned. Did you know, for example, that if minimum wage had kept up with [...]
John Boehner To Poors: We Want To Pay You Less To Help You
Well, that was fast! John Boehner has taken a close look at President Obama’s minimum wage proposal and after less than 24 hours of careful deliberation, has decided that Poors are doing just fine, thanks, and also, we must pay Poors very little and this is the best way to help them. “When you raise [...]
Walmart Will Take Away Your Sad, Meager Benefits For Daring To Say The Word ‘Union’
Fun fact of the day: some Walmart workers get benefits and vacation time! We did not know this, but apparently some of them do, and if they’re super attached to health care and time off, well, they best not be saying the word “Union,” because it might all go away.
No, Employees, McDonalds Will Not Be Paying You Overtime To Serve Their Garbage On Christmas
Remember our friend Tyree Johnson, the McDonald’s employee who is still earning minimum wage after 20 years of service? Well damn if the corporate overlords haven’t found another way to screw him and his. We thought they might be out of ideas for the year, but no, they are not, because they are going to try [...]
Walmart Spokesman: Let Them Eat Cake (They Buy With Discount Cards)
Bleeding heart liberals and latte-drinking East Coast elitists, please do not feel sorry for Walmart workers this Thursday as you enjoy the Thanksgiving holiday and try to think of ways to boycott a store you wouldn’t be caught dead in. You see, even though Walmart workers barely eke out a living on sub-poverty wages, the [...]
Walmart Strike Means No More Cedar Cheese or Those Cakes We Like
Today is a sad day for lovers of cedar cheese and those cakes we like because of the Walmart strike. The Walmart strike has, of course, been covered at length in the Labor section of your local newspaper so you are surely familiar with the details, except HA HA, just kidding! You probably don’t have [...]
Finally, A Way We Can Just Pay Our Taxes Directly to the Job Creators and Cut Out the Middle Man
Greetings, Incorporated Americans, how may we best serve you today? Oh, just by paying a tithe for the privilege of enriching corporate coffers, that’s all, no big deal. According to investigative journalist and author David Cay Johnston, you might already be doing so without even knowing it, which he seems to think is bad, but [...]
Scott Walker Bans Sick Days People of Milwaukee Voted For
Wisconsin’s duly elected slave driver Scott Walker is not done yet ruining the lives of everyone who lives in his state, planning on signing legislation passed by the legislature that would void an ordinance passed overwhelmingly by the voters of Milwaukee requiring businesses in the city to provide their workers sick days. Walker doesn’t have [...]
Joe The Plumber To Persuade Arlen Specter To… Do Something He Already Did
On Tuesday, Arlen Specter shocked America’s unions by switching sides on the Employee Free Choice Act and promising he would vote “no” if it ever came to a vote, on which he may have been the filibuster-breaking vote, thereby most likely killing the legislation for at least this year. In response, Joe the Plumber has [...]
Romney Whines About How Laying Off Workers Makes Him Sad
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