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Tag: wnd

The cats are cuter than anything you'll read in this post.

How Are White Wingnuts Fixing The Blacks Of Baltimore This Week?

Ever since the alleged police murder of Freddie Gray and the rioting that followed, white wingnuts have been trying SO HARD to do something -- anything! -- to help the poor black communities of Baltimore recover and move on...
Surely this man is not crazy.

Alan Keyes’ Army Of One Will Declare WAR On Gay-Marrying Supreme Court, Time To Panic!

Poor Alan Keyes. He just cannot get over things. He knows his arch-nemesis Barack Obama (who probably would be hard-pressed to remember Keyes' name) is out there, making sweet love to our enemies in Iran, so that they may...
By now, we can't imagine anyone would make a big deal about it.

Obama Trolling Donald Trump Again, Will Visit Kenya, Or Home Sweet Home

In a move that shouldn't provoke any hysteria at all on the internet, the White House announced that President Obama will travel to Kenya in July for the "2015 Global Entrepreneurship Summit (GES)," which is a "global platform connecting...
She tried to warn us

Michele Bachmann Tattles On Illegal-Lovin’ GOP To Her Friend, An Invisible Lion

Have you been missing former Rep. Michele Bachmann since she retired to be president of the United States of Cheap Gas? Us too! And it seems she might be regretting her retirement, because hoo boy, those morons in the House...
If Lincoln could hang 38 Sioux, why can't we hang us some bureaucrats?

WND Loon Erik Rush Wants To Hang Entire Obama Administration Some More

WorldNetDaily conspiracy-spinner (ah but we repeat ourselves) Erik "Not the famous Rush, the crazier one" Rush has had enough of all the high criming and high misdemeanoring in the Obama administration, and damned if he's willing to wait for...
Poor kids!

Jackbooted CPS Thugs Remove Kids From Wingnut Home Over Dad’s Snake Oil Cure-All

Planet Wingnut is in quite a lather this week over the decision by Arkansas child protection authorities to remove seven children from their parents' home in Hot Springs after deputies found quantities of a bogus "miracle cure" in the...
Um... I don't mind the head covering. But why goggles and bunny ears? I'm sure there's a very good reason.

Schoolkids Take Mosque Field Trip, Wingnuts Obviously Just Fine With That

Here is the latest evidence that the entire nation has been taken over by Sharia Law (the creeping kind): On a field trip to a Denver mosque, girls will be required to cover their hair. What has this country...
Promised and Delivered!

Michele Bachmann Gave You Your $2 Gas. You’re Welcome, America!

Retiring Congressdipshit Michele Bachmann has been doing a peculiar version of the Minnesota Long Goodbye, except instead of the usual arrangement, where a host follows a departing guest out to the car asking if they're really sure they don't...
Judgmental baby is judgmental

World Net Daily’s Funniest Stories Of 2014: Hmmm Er Well Okay!

You know that when conspiracy clearinghouse and Obama birther hub WorldNetDaily runs a large headline like this, you're going to regret clicking on it. But you also totally know you're going to click on it all the same: Was it,...
Back away, little pony. These are not nice people.

Derp Roundup: Fans Of Killer Cops Can Breathe Just Fine, Why Do You Ask?

Time for another roundup of the dumbest of the worst of the unfathomably stupid! We scrape the mishegas off our browser tabs, puree it into a frothy mess, and serve it up to you with a warning to not...
When in doubt, use this picture

WND Spills Blood, Tears, Jizz In Exit Interview With Michele Bachmann

Now that Michele Bachmann has said a God-filled farewell to the House of Representatives, she's also doing a valedictory tour of rightwing media, or at least WorldNetDaily. It is titled -- we swear we are not making this up...
Sudo bring me a muffin.

Derp Roundup: Biblical Computer Programming, Obama’s Race Czar, And Other Horrors

It's time for another Derp Roundup, the occasional feature where we pressure-wash all the crud off our open browser tabs and bring you some stories that didn't quite merit their own posts, but were too stupid to ignore altogether....
Insert Pink Floyd joke here

Michele Bachmann Thanks Phyllis Schlafly For Ending The Cold War

Michele Bachmann just wanted to let you all know that not only is she an American hero, she also has an American hero: anti-feminist and riot-starter Phyllis Schlafly, whom Bachmann describes in an interview with wingnut paranoia clearinghouse WND...
Derpy's oppo research mostly involves cataloging muffins at campaign brunches

Derp Roundup: Scott Brown’s In A Canoe, ISIS Is Relocating To New Mexico, And More

It's another Derp Roundup, our occasional collection of all the crud that's been piling up on our browsers but wasn't quite worth a full post. Apply booze or bleach as needed, but be careful where. First up, a tale of...
Admit it: You only read 'Nostromo' because it was the name of the ship In 'Alien'

WND Publisher Joseph Farah Just Wants Equal Rights For His People, The Hate-Gay-Marriageists

WorldNetDaily publisher Joseph Farah is taking a break from his critical work on behalf of birthers and believers in various conspiracies to explain that laws preventing discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation are actually Very Discriminatory Indeed -- not against...
Robin Williams conjures a demon, or throws a gang sign maybe.

Robin Williams Probably Consorted With Demons, Says WND In Touching Memorial Ad

It's kind of beautiful how, in the midst of tragedy, some people can calmly assess the situation and find a way to make things just a little shittier. Consider the great minds at conspiracy wackaloon hub WND, who took...