Tag Archives: wisconsin protests

  outstanding democracy performer

Famous Progressive Scott Walker Declares ‘Employee Recognition Day’

Uh oh, progressive governor Scott Walker would like to say “thank you” to the men and women who work in public service. That can’t be good. He wants you to send him the names, personal contact information, and places of work of certain state employees. So he’s finally finished those gas chambers he was working on, huh? Read more on Famous Progressive Scott Walker Declares ‘Employee Recognition Day’…
  doctors' notes: the holiest of documents

Scott Walker Now Going After Doctors Who Helped Union Protestors

ON WISCONSIN! The state Department of Regulation and Licensing and the Medical Examining Board said Wednesday that they had opened investigations into eight individuals who allegedly wrote doctor excuse notes for protesters at the state Capitol during rallies in February. Read more on Scott Walker Now Going After Doctors Who Helped Union Protestors…
  the people still love their scott

Scott Walker Blames Ruin of His Political Party On City Folk

Scott Walker lost control of his state supreme court yesterday when commie pinko JoAnne Kloppenburg defeated conservative David Prosser’s bid for re-election, though the race will probably end in a recount. How on Earth could a shoo-in for easy re-election like a supreme court justice with no real scandals on his record lose? WELL IT’S NOT SCOTT WALKER’S FAULT, IF THAT’S WHAT YOU’RE ASKING! The Republican Party of Minnesota is doing just fine! It’s the fact that Wisconsin VERY SUDDENLY has major cities that’s the problem. “You’ve got a world driven by Madison, and a world driven by everybody else out across the majority of the rest of the state of Wisconsin,” he said. Secession time! Read more on Scott Walker Blames Ruin of His Political Party On City Folk…
  too pross to call

WI GOP Supreme Court Justice Losing To Union Thug Lady In Close Race

Though state supreme court elections are typically decided by which name seems less weird when voters hover over that section of the ballot they know nothing about, Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker has raised the stakes of politics so much lately by trying to ruin everyone’s life that people actually turned out in droves yesterday for an election showdown between some old Republican justice with sex-offender glasses, David Prosser, and the proletariat’s candidate, Assistant Attorney General JoAnne Kloppenburg. At the moment, the race is too close to call, which means people could actually be forced to care about the results of a state supreme court election for days. Read more on WI GOP Supreme Court Justice Losing To Union Thug Lady In Close Race…
  alternate spring break

Wall Street Journal Going To End This Wisconsin Standoff Itself

Times are tough for journalists covering the standoff over collective bargaining in Wisconsin. Just how many days in a row are you supposed to write this “There are still protests and the state senators are still floating on a lazy river at some hotel in Illinois” story? The protestors and the legislators may be able to stick to their guns, but there’s a limit to reporters’ ethics and how much they can stand of this before they just start making stuff up and hope it comes true. Thus, we get the headline “Democrats to End Union Standoff” from the Wall Street Journal. Okay! Here comes a flood of pageviewz! Everything is all over! Except these Democrats say they’re not actually giving up and returning to the state. Read more on Wall Street Journal Going To End This Wisconsin Standoff Itself…
  wise guys

Wisc. (Union) Firefighters Not Allowed In State Capitol For Emergency Call

The un-benevolent ruling regime in Wisconsin got tired of those working people occupying the capitol, so this week the Republican authorities brought in new police officers to enforce the new, made-up occupancy limits. How strict is this enforcement? Firefighters responding to an emergency call in the capitol building weren’t allowed inside, either. Somebody could have died in there, but firefighters are not Republican legislators or Republican staff members, and saving people’s lives seems like a suspiciously pro-union thing for these thug union firefighters to do. Read more on Wisc. (Union) Firefighters Not Allowed In State Capitol For Emergency Call…
  thugs

Police Ordered To Capture WI Sens; Walker Says He’ll Fire Workers At Will

The Republicans in Wisconsin’s state senate have decided they’ve had enough of watching their poll numbers plummet runaway Democrats trying to murder democracy itself in a knife-fight of evil vs. good. The Republicans voted unanimously yesterday that Democrats are in contempt and ordered state law enforcement to detain them and bring them back to the chambers. This is not actually something the law says they can do, but a circuit court judge ruled they could, and actually wrote this: “The Senate must enforce Senate rules, if it chooses to do so. It can, also, ignore its own rules, if it chooses to do so.” Poor democracy. Meanwhile, America’s Governor Scott Walker says he’s just going to start laying off any state employee he sees. But he didn’t say if he will wear a crown and cape and cackle sinisterly while doing it or if he will just start openly saying he hates the people of his state. Read more on Police Ordered To Capture WI Sens; Walker Says He’ll Fire Workers At Will…
  california dreams

Yes, Wisconsin Now Has Palm Trees

How are all these Fox News reporters still alive considering they’re constantly being beaten to a bloody pulp by Wisconsin protestors’ surf boards? Be careful out there, you guys. Wear sunscreen. [YouTube] Read more on Yes, Wisconsin Now Has Palm Trees…
  leading political theorists

Serially Unemployed Meghan McCain Has Thoughts On Wisconsin Workers

What is Meghan McCain up to these days? When she’s not buying AC/DC pajamas at Walmart for her new Daily Beast colleagues Howard Kurtz and Andrew Sullivan, she’s been very hard at work composing her fortnightly column. Yes, that’s every two weeks. What a workload! Tina Brown should be careful; Meghan could hurt her back and be on disability for months. Meghan tried her best to come up with an opinion on the Wisconsin unions and runaway state senators. She really did! The result doesn’t really make sense, but we think she’s trying to say unions should just let it go and allow the state government to do whatever it wants, because this is all hurting society. Sure, Meg agrees a $89,000 a year salary doesn’t “seem” like a lot of money for people who don’t have trust funds, but humanity itself will be doomed if we continue to let unions collectively bargain. Read more on Serially Unemployed Meghan McCain Has Thoughts On Wisconsin Workers…
  malkin has to be fed too

Fox News’ Mike Tobin Says He Was Attacked By Wisconsin Protester

Masses of people in Wisconsin have been peacefully protesting for weeks now, because of their governor’s decision to take away worker’s rights for no good reason; not a single protester in Madison haseven been arrested. But that hasn’t stopped Fox News from trying to convict them all. Witness this hilarious report from Fox’s Mike Tobin on Sunday, pretending a whole bunch of protesters were going to get violent, get shot by tear gas, and get arrested. These people are from the Midwest, so they’re spending their time at the protest kindly knitting with each other, but that won’t stop this Fox guy from saying they “hit” him. RIGHT-WING BLOGOSPHERE POWER RANGERS, IT’S MORPHIN’ TIME! Read more on Fox News’ Mike Tobin Says He Was Attacked By Wisconsin Protester…
  real solutions to fake problems

Pedobear Offers To Help Scott Walker By Teaching Wisconsin’s Kids

As union protests rage on and state legislatures are at a standstill, one figure has emerged on the side of Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker who can solve all of this: Pedobear. If Walker doesn’t value the teachers of his state enough to let them have worker rights, Pedobear is a perfectly good alternative. He loves children and is ready to teach them new things. Here’s your Wisconsin/Indiana crisis update. Read more on Pedobear Offers To Help Scott Walker By Teaching Wisconsin’s Kids…
  money talks or something

Fake David Koch Has Lengthy Conversation With Real Scott Walker

Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker is rather busy these days, considering the state capitol and capital is flooded with protestors. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have time to talk to David Koch for 20 minutes on the taxpayer-funded phone in his taxpayer-funded office. Unfortunately for Walker, the “David Koch” he talked to for 20 minutes was just a guy, Buffalo Beast’s Ian Murphy, putting on a funny rich-guy voice. And it turns out Walker likes Morning Joe‘s Mika Brzezinski’s butt. Read more on Fake David Koch Has Lengthy Conversation With Real Scott Walker…
  people who don't have real jobs

Rick Santorum: Wisconsin Union Members Are Drug Addicts

Rick Santorum is not exactly creating a lot of buzz or momentum in the early stages of his attempt to run for president, so he’s just going to throw some metaphors out there and see if they stick. “What these folks are in Washington is no better than a drug dealer,” he said. And the Wisconsin unions? “They are acting like their drug is being taken away from them.” So how does Dr. Santorum know so much about drugs and drug dealers? Certainly he wasn’t a user. So he must run a rehab clinic for addicted youths he was too modest to tell us about. Or maybe one of those kids in the Santorum litter is a drug addict, because going through life high makes more sense than the reality of having Rick Santorum as your dad. Anyway, yes, Rick Santorum, people do get addicted to having a good job and being able to provide for their families. Being addicted to survival is sort of part of what it means to be a living being. Read more on Rick Santorum: Wisconsin Union Members Are Drug Addicts…
  the body's not cold right?

Helpful WaPo Columnist Tells Us What Giffords Would Think About Wisconsin

Unfortunately, Gabrielle Giffords was shot in the head, so she currently can’t tell us what she thinks about the situation in Wisconsin, or even if she can, her family is probably making her talk about things like “how she cares about them” or “how to stay alive and recover from the bullet that went through her brain.” Thankfully, the Washington Post employs a full roster of op-ed contributors who have nothing better to do with their spare time than pretend to know what people with life-threatening gunshot wounds think about political issues thousands of miles away that don’t concern them. “If the brave Gabrielle Giffords could speak normally, what would she say about these events? I hope she would agree with me: This is a sad moment for liberalism,” Charles Lane writes. Yeah, this classy gentleman is probably correct! It’s so nice of him to help out this gunshot victim who’s unfortunately not “normal.” Read more on Helpful WaPo Columnist Tells Us What Giffords Would Think About Wisconsin…