whole foods
Business Owners Being Dicks: Your Week In Review
Oh look! Another douchebag business owner is doing another douchebag thing. We kinda think that dude from Whole Foods should take this week’s prize, because he had the two-fer: calling Obamacare “fascism” and explaining he’s not a climate change denier – he just thinks climate change is happening and it is real and spectacular. However, [...]
Whole Foods Now Catering to Crazy People Who Don’t Shop There
Fancy yuppie grocery store Whole Foods is known mostly for being a good place to spend eight dollars on a tomato that was planted in the ground without chemicals, sung to, and watered with organic unicorn juice on a farm with “ethical” work conditions or whatever. Whole Foods is also apparently run by people who [...]
Why Can’t the Government Just Send All the Unhealthy People To Bagram and Leave the Rest of Us the Hell Alone?
South Korea was a simple place, a happy place. Then South Korea was introduced to the Internet, and also Starcraft. And now South Korean people want to kill themselves. [Matt Yglesias] John McCain does not want to be called a trail-blazin’ maverick: “The Spirit of America” will suit him just fine, thank you. [Think Progress] [...]
Finding Sushi In The City… Before It’s Too Late
Ha ha, now that there will be tons of babies running around DC thanks to Mr. Stupak and his coathanger-friendly amendment, women should start indulging in food that they won’t be able to eat while preggers, including sushi. And thankfully, DC is a city full of raw fish establishments.
Swine Soup
Ha ha, do you have the pig AIDS, because just about everyone in DC has it! Have you sneezed or coughed at all in the last decade? Then it’s definitely the pig AIDS, and you shouldn’t touch anyone, especially small children or old dying people, because you could kill them. There’s no Tamiflu left, oh [...]
Boycott Whole Foods! Or Don’t!
So so many ethical quandaries this week! Should “we” “forgive” Michael Vick for being a dog-tortoruing sociopath, because he paid his debt to society? Should “we” continue to patronize a food store whose CEO — a man whose douchebaggery was well-established years ago — recently revealed an unpalatably conservative bent vis-a-vis the topic of heatlhcare? [...]
Whole Foods Weighs In On Health Care Debate, Because Honestly At This Point, Why Not?
Were you at Netroots Nation? Your Wonkette was not invited. But Matt Yglesias was, and he spoke on every panel covering every imaginable topic: Afghanistan, climate change, tax policy, amateur dentistry, LOLcats — everything. [Matt Yglesias] “First Obama’s brownshirts came for the old people, but I was not an old person, so I said nothing. [...]
EAT A BAG OF LOW-FAT NUTRIENT-DENSE DICKS, JOHN MACKEY: The CEO of Whole Foods is a big fan of Ayn Rand, did you know that? Which explains why his solution to America’s healthcare crisis is for people to quit being so goddamn lazy and eat more healthy vegetables, which are easily procured for $4.99 a [...]
Happy Hours: Not Just For Booze?
Don’t worry, we’re not asking anyone to reevaluate the presence of alcohol in their life, nor are we insinuating that there are better means to post-work happiness than drinking. Happy hours are essential to the DC way of life and we would never pass judgment on such a meaningful occasion. You have our word. Some [...]
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Butterstickmail
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