America may be a racist, illiterate nation of violent fucktards, but if there’s one thing the anti-socialist anti-welfare white trash love, it’s free money. So we can expect millions of U.S. losers to give up one of their favorite things to stuff in their mouths — dead chicken flesh coated in a few inches of corn syrup and oil batter — in hopes of getting communist free money from the liberals. Yes, PETA’s “Cash For Cluckers” program is on. MORE »

Do you own some terrible old car? Probably not! But you might be making payments on some terrible old car. Communist Premier Nobama and his Duma-Politburo (the House and Senate) have got a great deal for you: Just trade in your gas-guzzling sticker-covered crapmobilie full of McDonald’s bags for a shiny new better-mileage-getting Automobile of the Future, and you’ll get $4,500. That is, what, equal to about a year’s worth of unemployment? MORE »

So this news channel embedded deep in Bitters country — West Virginia, Ohio, and Kentucky — runs the occasional poll asking such probing questions as “Do you plan to buy mulch from the city of Charleston?” Here is a new favorite. [WSAZ Polls]

Liberals like John McCain have spent their lives spending your money in Washington, so it’s no surprise that McCain’s campaign has given up its pathetic fund-raising attempts and will now go on the Election 2008 dole. Today, the McCain camp admitted it will “accept taxpayer money to finance his general election and share other costs with the Republican National Committee,” the Politico reports. And guess what kind of no-money-having people Americans hate more than anything? MORE »

Here he is, America’s Mayor of Terrorism, dressed up in a fucking weird costume again. Oh, and berating a zoo animal for being on welfare — ha ha, it’s funny because of all the blacks on welfare! No wait, it’s racist because he’s dressed up as … John Travolta in Battleship Scientologia? We don’t know. But it’s definitely stupid and offensive so you can bet there are about a thousand similar clips floating around — in fact, there’s a whole movie collection of this crap called Giuliani Time, and that’s where we got this clip.

Big Cat Rudy Giuliani [YouTube]

The heartbreaking message of this Washingtonian item is that journalists who marry each other are doomed to sell their ramshackle houses for only $1.75 million, but reporters who “marry up” can buy $2.95-million houses. MORE »

• Rep. Bob Ney (R-OH) will not seek reelection, due to his being “Congressman A” in disgraced lobbyist Jack Abramoff’s plea agreement. [WP]

• Israeli attacks in Lebanon increased in intensity yet again over the weekend, and Hezbollah fired more rockets. The French/US cease-fire plan fell apart in Sunday’s UN Security Council meeting. [WP, NYT]
• Senator Joe Lieberman finally “explained” his position on the Iraq War to Connecticut Primary Voters, feels “heavy responsibility” to bring troops home ASAP, wouldn’t bring troops home until President says it’s safe. [NYT, WP]
• Round two of Welfare Reform: More work and longer hours; no education, mental health recovery, or addiction support. [WP]
• On the plus side, there are now 15 states where you can shoot first. [NYT]
• Representative Cynthia McKinney (D-GA) is pinning her reelection hopes on a documentary about her and the elections of 2000 and 2004. [NYT]
• Harold Ford, a black Democrat running for Bill Frist’s vacant Senate seat in Tennessee, may actually win. [Time]

* Senate votes 72 to 25 to hold roll call on Samuel Alito’s confirmation today; Sen. Kerry defends his filibuster attempt. [WP, NYT, LAT, WT, USAT]
* Bush will promote alternative fuels and nuclear power in tonight’s State of the Union. Senior official: “What’s interesting about this discussion is that he isn’t talking about oil exploration at home. Nobody wants to get bogged down in those arguments again.” [NYT, USAT]
* 76% of Americans deem health care “an absolute priority” for ‘06 and only 28% support maintaining the current force in Iraq, according to new WSJ-NBC poll. Bush’s approval rating is steady at 39% as leadership and honesty numbers have fallen over the past year; 63% say Democrats lack a “clear agenda.” [WSJ, MSNBC]
* Sen. Russ Feingold (D-Wis.) questions Attorney General Alberto Gonzales‘ statements on warrentless eavesdropping. During his confirmation, Gonzales said the practice was “not the policy of the agenda of this president” and offered to tell Congress if that changed. [WP]
* Administration official explains White House strategy on Alito: “Any time they are yelling, preaching, lecturing, and you are cool and calm and breathing deep, you are winning. What that means on television sets where the American people are watching this is, you look good and they look bad. It was the central operating premise.” [NYT]

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