we the people

LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT  5:18 pm November 15, 2012

Alabama Fella Pretty Much Started Petition ‘Cause Fascist Gubmint Shut Down His Nudie Carwash

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Lots of red-blooded US Merkins love America so much they want to LEAVE IT (because Kenyan Mooslim Sharia Oppression and such). But one such patriot is a little more interesting! Sup, guy who started Alabama’s secession petition Derrick Belcher, 45, of “Chuncula”? “Blah blah libertarianism, RON PAUL!!!1!, freedom, not-racist, hard-working, etc.” Oh yes, here it [...]

DEMOCRACY IS FOR SUCKERS  8:51 am November 15, 2012

Petition To Punch Grover Norquist In Dick Removed From White House Petition Site

by Kris E. Benson

Well, Wonketteers, we bring you some very depressing news: the petition for “all everyone to punch Grover Norquist in the dick” has been removed from We The People, the White House’s platform for direct democracy. This saddens us greatly for reasons that should be pretty obvious, do we really need to go into it because [...]

SUGGESTION BOX  10:10 pm September 1, 2011

White House Will Now Pretend To Listen To Everyone’s Crazy Ideas

by Blair Burke

Hey, America! Do you have ideas? Do you think that maybe everyone should be able to smoke lots of weed, or drive in cars without seat belts, or that we should all be ruled by robots, instead of Barack Obama or, Allah-forbid, Rick Perry? Well, terrific, because now the White House will humor you with [...]


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