Tag: wayne lapierre

Let’s All Watch The NRA’s Big Tough Wayne LaPierre Whine A Whole Bunch At CPAC!

It's got everything -- paid protesters, hanging whistleblowers, accusing the Left of wanting people to die of heart attacks on the way to the hospital...

Senate Republicans Vote To Send Thoughts And Prayers To Future Mass Shooting Victims

What, you wanted background checks and stuff like that? Are you some kind of Communist?
Maybe not that bright a guy. It's possible.

Donald Trump, NRA Agree: Only A Idiot Would Advocate Guns In Bars Like Donald Trump, NRA

Donald Trump clarified Monday that it was completely obvious that he never said people should carry guns at bars and nightclubs, even if it sure sounded like he'd said that. Where would you get such an impression, except from the things he said?

Trickster Demon Obama Takes Old Fart’s Guns Away, By Not Taking Old Fart’s Guns Away

Will Obama stop at NOTHING to pry every gun out of every cold, clammy, dead head in America?

Glenn Beck Fails To Drown Total Muslim Grover Norquist In Bathtub

Talk show has-been Glenn Beck has failed to kick tax-cut guru Grover Norquist out of the National Rifle Association for being a Muslim Brotherhood spy. It's like nobody wants to have a good paranoid purge anymore.
Granny's got a gun

NRA Adds Actual Fairy Tales To Usual Lineup Of Gun Fantasies

We just love a good conservative children's story, or we suppose we would, if we ever found a good one. So far, though, we keep finding a lot of moralistic twaddle, such as rhyming fables about the torments of...
Of course, in the REAL Old West, lawmen often confiscated your guns while you were in town

NRA Goon Challenges Obama To Friendly Shooting Match About Guns

A week after pussing out on the chance to show up at CNN's "town hall" discussion of guns, where President Obama cruelly taunted them for bravely running away, the National Rifle Associated has issued its own challenge to debate...

For Third Anniversary Of Newtown Child Murders, Give Classy ‘Christian Carry’ Pin To Someone You Love

It's been three years since Sandy Hook, and 554 American children have been killed by guns since then. That works out to an average of one child sacrificed every other day on the altar of the Holy Second Amendment....
Empty-headed fool.

Ben Carson: If The Jews Had Guns, The Holocaust Might Not Have Turned Out So :(

Ben Carson is apparently no longer content to tour American disaster sites, read the names off of memorials, and call all the victims pussies for failing to stand up to the bad guys, with guns. So now he has...
Sawed-off shotguns: They're in the Constitution!

Here’s How The Second Amendment Has Prevented Tyranny Lately

While we know guns had nothing to do with the tragedy today that took the lives of Virginia TV station WDBJ reporter Alison Parker and cameraman Adam Ward, in addition to the suicide of the shooter, a disgruntled former...

Virginia Journalist Killer Was Black Man, And Wingnuts Are ON IT

By now, you've heard the gruesome news, unless you work at a bar and you're just now getting up. A disgruntled former employee of WDBJ-TV in Roanoke allegedly carried out a plan to murder two of his former colleagues,...
Scenes from the hotel rooms at the convention, probably.

NRA Convention Is Jizz-Soaked Festival Of Guns, Fear, Hillary-Hate, More Jizz

The 2015 NRA Convention concluded this weekend in Nashville, and despite the fact that attendees were not allowed to carry their guns every single place they wanted, even if they thought they saw an ISIS or a black person,...
Playing the arms race card

NRA Wonders Why You Paranoids Fear Gun Nuts And Their Weapons Stockpiles

The NRA just can't understand the paranoia of you people who have a problem with Responsible Gun Owners and their Perfectly Legal Firearms, which they keep with them at all times because they need to be ready to instantly...
Never forget

James Brady Passes Away, Will No Longer Try To Put Your Guns In FEMA Camps

Let us pour one out for James Brady, former press secretary for Ronald Reagan and longtime gun-control advocate, who died today at the age of 73. Brady was Reagan’s press secretary for the first two months of the Great Communicator’s...

In Seattle, Good Guy With Pepper Spray Stops Bad Guy With Gun

According to Wayne LaPierre, this isn't supposed to even be possible, but yesterday's mass shooting in progress was stopped by a good guy with no gun: A Seattle Pacific University (SPU) student tackled a gunman who was reloading his shotgun...

Jon Stewart Seems To Think The NRA Is Paranoid For Some Reason (video)

Tuesday's Daily Show had some fun with last weekend's NRA convention, leading off, as one must, with the WTF heard round the world, Sarah Palin's weird joke about how waterboarding is how she'd baptize terrorists. And then he reminded...