Wonkette

Senator Wayne Allard (R-Terrorist) sent out a nice press release today honoring the “first responders” who fight crime and fires and whatnot — if by “honoring” you mean “calling them a bunch of losers.” MORE »

* Henry Paulson and Rob Portman have been “unleashed” on Democrats who’re loud-mouthing about deficit reduction. [WP]
* Democrats thumping Bible on march to political center. [NYT]
* New “Sportsman’s Alliance” conservation group to advocate wildlife habitats be kept as pristine places to stroll about blasting animals with shotguns. [WP]
* Wayne Allard plans the work, works the plan, and marks the wall to count the days til he’s just scheduling tee times. [WP, NYT]
* President Bush maintains that law enforcement has the authority to look into exactly when and where terror suspects saved 39 cents on garlic hummus and triscuits. [WP]
* Interior Department Mineral Manager Johnnie Burton isn’t quite “perfect at everything.” [NYT]
* Condi’s looking forward to a threesome next month. [LAT]
* MLK day was inspirational for Russell Simmons, who now has an idea for a great new reality show. [NYT]

* Disapproval of Bush could drive a rejection of Republican candidates in November. GOP pollster: “Democrats will have an easier time of getting out their vote because of their intense disapproval of the president. That means we Republicans are going to have to bring our ‘A’ turnout game in November.” [WP]
* Rumsfeld’s “grip on the Defense Department is slipping as some uniformed officers increasingly chart their own course.” [W$J]
* Republicans back Rumsfeld on Sunday talk shows. [NYT, USAT]
* 48 American troops have died in Iraq so far this month. [USAT]
* If Roe were overturned, 22 states are likely to “impose significant new restrictions on abortion.” [USAT]
* Josh Bolten officially takes office today; he gave Andy Card an Egg McMuffin on his way out. [USAT]
* Time magazine names Sens. Thad Cochran, Kent Conrad, Dick Durbin, Ted Kennedy, Jon Kyl, Carl Levin, Richard Lugar, John McCain, Olympia Snowe, and Arlen Specter as the nation’s best; Sens. Daniel Akaka, Wayne Allard, Jim Bunning, Conrad Burns, and Mark Dayton considered the worst. [Time]
* Immigration rallies “have also energized those who support a crackdown on illegal immigration.” [NYT]
* Can Rep. Tom DeLay be a lobbyist next? [WP]
* Sen. Ted Stevens (R-Alaska) brings sadness to Washington state in an effort to take down Sen. Maria Cantwell (D-Wash.). [WP]
* Supreme Court justices spark laughter just from speaking funny. [USAT]

• Names & Faces: Michael Brown hid behind a newspaper as he slipped into the NuYu salon and spa yesterday for a scalp massage and haircut. [WP]
• Under the Dome: Lawmakers beat lobbyists in two basketball games. . . Two “Real World” roommates headline Gulf Coast fundraiser; Senators Wayne Allard and Ted Stevens will attend. [The Hill]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Condoleeza Rice to O’Reilly: “I’ve been black all my life. Nobody needs to tell me how to be black.” [NYDN]
• Page Six: Lewinsky says goodbye to New York, hello to London: “Maybe I will meet my husband there