Tag: washington state

The senator and the trivia question answer.

You Got Your Seattle Drinky Thing In My Senate Sunday! Two Great Tastes, Etc., Etc

They probably won't be up past midnight counting the U.S. Senate ballots in Washington, is what we're saying.

Washington State’s Weird Primary/Caucus System Is Bad And Washington Should Feel Bad

Washington State's primary Monday had two winners; Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. Only one of them actually won any delegates, because Washington does things strangely.
She thought her question was maybe "too motherly."

Washington Republican Asks Teens How Much Dick They’re Getting, Totally Normal

Washington state Rep. Mary Dye sounds just like our mommy, and your mommy, and all of U.S. America's mommy. She makes apple pie and gives good advice and leans in real close and says things like, "HEY CHAMP. GETTIN'...
We're pretty sure there's just not enough red dye for an entire iceberg.

‘Patriots’ Take Credit For Perfectly Routine Removal Of Chinese Flag, Save America From Communism!

Wonkette EXCLUSIVE must cite Wonkette!!! The Wingnuttosphere is full of excited stories about an absolute OUTRAGE that occurred last week, when the flag of COMMUNIST RED CHINA, our sworn enemy and trading partner, was flown in front of the...
More guns just means more freedom

Gun Rights Fools Behave Foolishly Again, Aren’t You Just Floored?

Many gun owners are responsible, reasonable people. They don't particularly care whether they're allowed to carry an assault rifle into Chipotle. They are fine with background checks. They follow the law. Then there's the other ones. You know, the idiots....

Gun Roundup: The State Of Our Union’s Gun Nuts Is Stupid As Ever

As gun ownership becomes more about making a half-baked political statement predicated on paranoid delusions and industry propaganda, and less about practical matters like hunting and home defense, it stands to reason that gun owners themselves would display an...
Don't bogart that bong, grandma

Grammaw Queefs A Spliff

What happens when three grandmothers who've never gotten high before decide to try out The Reefer? Some dudes in Washington State -- where it is perfectly legal for grandmothers to get recreationally high -- decided to find out. And...
It's really quite simple. Or should be.

Rachel Maddow: Good For You, Washington State, You’re 50% Smarter Now (Video)

Rachel Maddow is delighted -- and so are we, because happy Rachel = Happy us -- that in the recent Scottish independence referendum, small but substantial numbers of ballots had to be thrown out because they had both "Yes"...

House Passes ‘No Welfare For Weed’ Bill, Which Fails To Ban Welfare For Weed

After coming back from a five-week "district work period" for eight action-packed days of legislating, members of the House and Senate went slinking out of DC on Thursday while mumbling over their shoulders that they'd be on email if...
The bad trip scene in that movie was kind of epic

Colorado PSA: Don’t Eat All The Pot Candy Like That Idiot MoDo

Thank god, a Maureen Dowd column has finally resulted in something good for the world. After she chowed down on a pot candy bar and got super-hiiiiiiigh -- very unpleasantly so -- the legal marijuana industry in Colorado has...

Super Skeevy Doctor Will Give You Drugs, Fap Over Your Pix, And Sext During Your Surgery

Are you one of those people who are afraid to be put under for surgery because you harbor a fear that something weird or unsafe will happen to you while you're out? No? Howzabout you read about this Seattle...

The NRA Is Scared Of Girls

Here's some very measured, very partial Nice Time for you nice people! The National Rifle Association, according to a piece by Laura Bassett and Christina Wilkie at the Huffington Post, is quietly backing away from one part of its...

Idiots Have Some ‘Thoughts’ On That Washington State ‘Bridge’

How many bridges must a man drive off before we call him a man? None, because he is just going to sit there in the water and wait to get "rescued" by the nanny state government instead of pulling...

Austerity Declared Winner In Washington State Bridge Collapse

Gee, I wonder what will happen if we build roads and bridges, then completely ignore them for decades and drastically cut funding everywhere in order to suck the knob of the right wing’s newest golden calf, austerity? Surely nothing...

Hero GOP Senator’s Office Tells Gays To Go Grow Their Own Food and Gasoline

Washington state Senator Mike Hewitt is cosponsoring an awesome and superconstitutional antidiscrimination bill, SB 5927. It says you can't discriminate against people based on their race, country of origin, sexual orientation, etc., unless you really really want to. Cool...