Here’s a great new ad from the anti-gay-marriage amendment crusaders in whatever state is “doing that” now… ah, super gay Washington state. God and the Jesus made marriage for men and women, so they could fuck and have children and play in piles of leaves. How would you heteros like it in you’re splashing leaves with your children Little Johnny reaches into the pile only to grab the exposed cock of a hidden homo? You simply would not care for that. UPDATE: Oh hey what is this about permissions now? Just click the link. Dumb “Vimeo.” [Vimeo]

The brilliant Washington State Democratic party went about making an attack ad of Republican gubernatorial candidate Dino Rossi by using a “Sopranos” theme. In case you don’t know anything about life, “Dino Rossi” is the most Italian name since “Papa John Pizza.” And so the “Italian Club of Seattle” got predictably offended and called it “racist,” against dinosaurs. [YouTube, Seattle Times]

Here’s the first page of a real letter from some sad panda named Marvin D. Wells, one of 28 pledged Hillary Clinton delegates from Washington State who will still cast his vote for her at the national convention in August. He still hopes that Hillary can pull off a coup at the convention, you see, because without her he’s “Just A Nobody.” We know this because it’s written in large purple fairy-tale font atop the letter. Why must Barack Obama hurt this adorable Microsoft Word ‘97 artist’s feelings? WHY MUST BARACK OBAMA MAKE HIM FEEL LIKE A NOBODY? [PDF Letter via Slog]

Oh irony: the most math-averse candidate in the presidential race now needs the numbers on his side…and the numbers are pissed. MORE »

Confusion reigned in Bexar (that’s pronounced “bear,” Yankees) County yesterday, as thousands of dullards swamped the elections department with phone calls asking where they could vote on Tuesday. The answer: Nowhere! The Texas primary isn’t till March. MORE »