Tag: washington post

Donald Trump Will Make It Illegal For #Rigged Media To Hurt His Feelings

In Donald Trump's America, you won't be allowed to make Donald Trump cry!
The eyes seem to follow your wallet around the room

Trump Aide: Donald Trump Can Misuse Charity Funds However He Wants Since It’s All His Money, Silly

Donald Trump doesn't have to follow the same financial rules other people do. It's so obvious when you think about it.
So there.

Trump Campaign Explains Hinky Trump Foundation Donations: It Was Hillary Clinton, Duh.

The Donald Trump campaign's official response to evidence the Trump Foundation paid for Donald Trump's private business: 'Neener-neener-neener.'
This election is going better than 2008, we think.

LOL Hillary Clinton Might Win Mississippi, Yes We Said MISSISSIPPI

Mississippi could become a 'battleground state' HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Donald Trump’s Russian Buddies Probably So Excited About Trump’s First Classified Intelligence Briefing!

Could Trump's national security briefing end up leaking state secrets to Russia? MAYBE.

Donald Trump Loves Sunday School So F*cking Much, It’s Terrific And Elegant And You Get Juice Boxes

Trump spoke to a big gay-hatin' conference of bigots this week. Click to see what he said!

Wonkagenda: Thursday, August 11, 2016

You get in here and read your news brief, RIGHT NOW!

Washington Post Says Trump Teaching GOP To Love The Gays, LOL Shut Up, Washington Post

How weird, since Trump is addressing an INSANE anti-gay summit this week!
is this thing on?

Apple Gets Patent To Destroy Its Own Creation

Former startup Apple is valiantly sticking up for the entertainment industry with a new patent designed to thwart obnoxious iPhone recordings. Have to say, we can't think of anything that could go wrong with this technology in the hands of...

Whom Did Hillary Clinton Threaten To Murder To Get Jerry Brown’s Endorsement?

The Washington Post explains Jerry Brown's 'lukewarm' endorsement of Hillary Clinton. Lucky mindreaders at the Washington Post!

Marco Rubio Is Sick Of Your Nonsense. Marco Rubio Is Sick Of Your Nonsense. Marco Rubio Is

Marco Rubio does not think much of your "journalism," Washington Post. Marco Rubio, welcome to the club!

Chinese Restaurant Server In Trouble For Mocking Jerk Hipsters On Receipt. (Hint: The Hipsters Were Jerks)

In which a server at a Chinese restaurant is schooled by an insufferable hipster on the authenticity of serving rice in small bowls rather than large. STOP IT, HIPSTERS.
Watch where you point that thing, bub

Alex Jones Auditions To Be Trump’s White House Press Secretary With Very Sane Revolution Rant

Alex Jones is kind of a sore winner. After his boy Donald Trump won the Indiana primary Tuesday night and Ted Cruz dropped out of the campaign, Jones posted a rambling shouty video -- and we mean rambling, even...

Trump Campaign Manager Corey Lewandowski Goes To Jail, For Being A Dick

Trump campaign manager Corey Lewandowski, human spleen, has turned himself in on misdemeanor battery charges for misdemeanor-battering a gal Breitbart reporter for having the temerity to exist in his field of vision. Despite Lewandowski's insistence that he could not...