Tag: wars

Tomi Lahren Says Colin Kaepernick Only Allowed To Protest His Own Dad

Tomi Lahren is clearly triggered by seeing black people protest racism, maybe she needs a safe space?

Oh Look, Paul Ryan Lied About Something

Are you done yet? Did you read all eight gazillion pages of the Ryan Budget, or did you stop after the first few lines and pleasure yourself thinking about his dreamy biceps? Well, we didn’t read it all either...

Obama Writes Op-Ed With Friends Promising Never To End Libya War

Oh this is cute! Barack Obama got together with his friends David Cameron and Nicolas Sarkozy at the war treehouse, pulled out some construction paper, and wrote an op-ed together in blood-colored crayon. so long as Qaddafi is in power,...

U.S. About To Lose Another War

Why are our war planes shootin' up Libya right now? Just because we hadn't done it in a while? Who knows! Does the U.S. want Gaddafi out of power? Russia and China seem to think so. Gaddafi's compound was...

South Korea Doing Its Best To Get U.S. Into Another War

If Iraq really does wind all the way down, America will only have one war. What will we do with ourselves?! No worries. Defying North Korean threats of violent retaliation and “brutal consequences beyond imagination,” South Korea on Monday...

Michael Steele Still Trying To Get Fired, Calls Afghanistan War ‘Cute’

RNC chairman Michael Steele is either dumb or really likes making his party angry and/or sigh, because yesterday he was caught on video in a circus tent saying that the Afghanistan war is bad and didn't need to be...

Good News For Gays Who Like Fighting In Wars

Hey, it looks like Obama and the Democratic Congress are finally going to get around to repealing don't ask, don't tell, just weeks before the midterm election returns a 100 percent Republican Congress that would never ever agree to...

Everyone Is Mad At America, But America Is Mad At Everyone Too!

America is very serious capital S serious about the Pakistanis doing away with all of Pakistan's Taliban. Obama's new thing is going to be unemployment. This, in fact, is many people's new thing. It's looking like an American, Chicago...

BUT AREN'T THESE WARS FINANCED BY JESUS? Interesting that it only took certain members of our Congress eight years of multiple lost wars to even consider proposing some sort of personal financial incentive to finish them off: "History shows...

John McCain Not Pleased With This ‘Possible End Of War’ Business

The most shocking news story of the day, no? Walnuts says, "The way that you win wars is to break the enemy’s will, not to announce dates that you are leaving." VICTORY! This article also notes, terrifyingly, that Walnuts...

DOVEY MCDOVEYTON FINALLY MAKES HIS WAR DECISION: And for the first time in the history of the United States, a president has decided to continue war-making: "WASHINGTON — President Obama has issued his order to send more troops to...

Meghan McCain Did NOT Enjoy That One Time Your Wonkette Was Nice To Her!

WHAT UP Meg McCabe? It's gonna be like this, is it? "After my recent appearance on Jay Leno, one Web site posted a comment from the editor saying, mockingly, they have a 'NEW ZERO TOLERANCE POLICY for comments of...

ROBERT McNAMARA IS DEAD: Jesus, anybody else feel like dying in the next week or two? Because now is clearly the time to do it! Robert McNamara prosecuted America's hopeless adventure in Vietnam on behalf of Presidents Kennedy...

Who Lost The Goddamn Wars?

Let's hope our President finds the wars soon, and that the wars are safe.

John Conyers Circulates HIT PIECE On Sexy Sanjay Gupta

As Mark Penn told us all during the Democratic primaries, it is an established socio-political fact that black people do not like brown people and vice-versa, because of Microtrends, and this is why Barack Obama cannot win 70% of...

McCain Campaign Says Obama Would Hit A Lady

The McCain people are pretty hopped up on steroids today and are issuing some tuff talk after this morning's delightful housing kerfuffle. They're putting the finishing touches on an ad about Obama's "slum landlord" friend Tony Rezko, a topic...