December 7, 2013
Reaganesque? Ol’ Mittens? The Man With the Golden Tongue? Sure, he’s got the hair, and the complete lack of devotion to anything resembling fact or verifiable truth, but really, Reaganesque? Yes, Mitt Romney is “Reaganesque,” by which we mean “balls-deep in murdering nuns and Latin American death squads.”
It seems the TSA has taken a break from the hard work of molesting babies and congressmen and little girls with degenerative spinal diseases and poor Geraldo Rivera, and has turned its attentions instead to actually dangerous old men. How dangerous? Well, dude has been known to order the deployment of a bomb here, a [...]
World renowned sicko and former Liberian prez Charles Taylor is the first head of state to be convicted by an international tribunal since the Nuremberg Trials after World War II. (Nah guys, Pinochet was just Spain.) Who says that there’s no such thing as international law? Up next at The Hague is Laurent Gbagbo, the [...]
Father to Morning Joe cohost Mika Zbrezinzszkzy and Poland’s former intelligence chief Zbigniew Siemiatkowski has been charged with violating international law and “unlawfully depriving prisoners of their liberty” by helping the CIA to set up a “black site” Qaeda (and, of course, “Qaeda-accused” and “Qaeda-adjacent”) prison in Poland. This is excellent news for Dick Cheney!
In the Diminished Expectations Department, Obama’s Justice Department persecuting Obama-lovin’ leftists for having liberal ideals is one of those things that warrants a very reasonable response like, Eh I’m never voting again and also am going to BLOW UP AMERICA, even though such a response will also result in Obama’s Justice Department persecuting you. But [...]
Wow, we are not even going to click through these, because we kind of remember the last several batches of “extremely graphic” pictures of U.S. troops and U.S. military contractors murdering and torturing Muslims in the various countries where America continues to murder and torture people, for Freedom. In fact, we’re going to cover our [...]
Oh, other people shouted stuff at Dick Cheney yesterday at CPAC. Don’t think you’re safe from a little underground bunker torture, Paultards. He’s still alive, you know.
Barack Obama is taking a break from his favorite non-golf game (enraging liberal bloggers) by returning to his actual mission in life, which is shitting on the holy infant Jesus Christ. That’s right, Obama’s Afghanistan War Pornography was deliberately timed to CANCEL the annual repeat of the Snoopy cartoon, A Charlie Brown Xmas. But, eh, [...]
Bank of America lost $1 billion—and your Wonkette editor’s debit card!!—in the third quarter. [New York Times] Do not read this, keep thy heart pure: Boy in the Balloon? Likely a publicity stunt. [New York Times] A weak dollar is good news for things that are made here and exported elsewhere. This is an important [...]
George Bush, what a meanie! He failed to pardon such blameless white-collar criminals as Michael Milken and Jeffrey Skilling, he did nothing for the innocent bear-rape scribe Scooter Libby, and most importantly, he did not issue any sort of blanket protection to the many steaming turds in his administration who cooked up elaborate torture schemes, [...]
Dennis Kucinich has just one day left before George W. Bush leaves office, FOREVER. He has tried to impeach Bush, repeatedly, but so far it hasn’t “taken.” Will Kucinich finally be able to impeach this goon today as part of Barack Obama’s national day of service? Probably not! But Feral House has published a Memorial [...]
And aren’t we going to miss this guy, Mr. Richard Cheney? Here’s your “vice” president talking about his proudest moment: Authorizing the anti-American and unconstitutional torture of terror suspect. The 9/11 attacks didn’t “change” him, they just made him more right about everything! [ABC News]
Some liberal group of liberals produced a fake edition of the New York Times revealing all the wonderful things that will happen once hippies rule the world, next July. The evil corporate Harvard Business School will close forever; George Bush will be tried for war crimes; and the Patriot Act will be repealed by a [...]