America’s neo-con pamphlet the Washington Post can be found festering in certain driveways from Reston to Chevy Chase, but sometimes that’s not good enough for the powerful CEO or lobbyist who wants to, say, beat the shit out of Richard Cohen in person. This is why Post publisher Katharine Weymouth is now hosting intimate sexy gatherings at her home, where for a small admission price (between $25,000 and $250,000), the lonely business leader can dine with WaPo editors and journalists, get a loving hummer from Krauthammer or Kristol or (imagine!) both of them. MORE »

• On Christmas, four DC cops were videotaped stealing from Toys for Tots. Dick Cheney will subpoena this video and masturbate to it until Valentine’s Day. [DC Examiner]
• Former Post executive editor Len Downie writes smutty fan-fiction about Ben Bradlee, our nation’s first lady. [Washingtonian]
• The Washington Post and the Baltimore Sun will now share stories, but only those about “certain Maryland news” (traffic on the Beltways?) and sports. [Fishbowl DC]
• Barry’s face will now grace Metro farecards, just like an actual fascist dictatorship. [WTOP]
• The cause of Bethesda’s terrible Biblical flood is still a mystery, but a sublime mystery. [Washington Post]

Don’t you just love it when some quippy Business Section jackass at the WaPo decides to tackle gentrification on a small business-level, assumes a positive urban-renewal tone but ultimately just says “IT’S A LOT BETTER IN THIS AREA SINCE THE BLACK PEOPLE LEFT”? Well, we had one of those today, about a liquor store. The subhead: “As Rough-Hewn Area Goes Upscale, Merchant Shifts From Beer to Champagne.” What a merrily racist Christmas Eve ’tis! MORE »

After getting the boot for trying to interview Algeria’s revolutionary army in the 1950s, the French have finally forgiven Ben Bradlee, the legendary editor of the Washington Post. Bradlee, 86, received the Legion of Honor from France last week. [NYP] MORE »

Huzzah! Thank you A1 of this morning’s Washington Post; we had no idea that there was a lesbian hunchback detective raping suspects.

The online headline now reads, “Detective’s Hunch Led Her to Suspect in Rape.” So she’s still a hunchback detective, but isn’t raping suspects anymore.

Detective’s Hunch Led Her to [something about rape] [WP]

Call us old fashioned, but when we stop by the Washington Post’s website it is usually to read news from Washington. Instead, the former newspaper’s website is topped off with an “interactive video feature” of random people spouting gibberish. MORE »

The heartbreaking message of this Washingtonian item is that journalists who marry each other are doomed to sell their ramshackle houses for only $1.75 million, but reporters who “marry up” can buy $2.95-million houses. MORE »

* Vice President Cheney will receive a warning citation for hunting without the proper stamp on his permit. [The Smoking Gun] MORE »