Here’s your favorite unstable old man right where he wants to be, atop a pile of headlines predicting a pretty solid 6%+ Obama win in the popular vote, plus an extra thousand electoral votes. [Politics Home]

• ENDORSEMENTS: Your editor endorses John McCain, for president, of America. [AOL Political Machine]

We checked in on Arizona last week and found “favorite (carpetbagger) son” John McCain was not exactly killing in his alleged home state. In fact, his double-digit lead was down to about a half-dozen points, and we gleefully imagined a scenario in which Walnuts lost Arizona. It would be fantastically humiliating for McCain and Republicans everywhere. And now, it is very close to being reality! MORE »

If there’s one thing nutty klanslady Sarah Palin is a-scared of, it is the Communist Threat. (And Katie Couric.) While there is no evidence of an actual communist country on Earth outside of, say, Cuba and … let’s see, that child army of Marxists or whatever in Nepal, it is still highly probable that a secret Communist could somehow win the presidency of our god-fearing anti-Communist country, America, and then covertly turn us all into Mao-worshiping Soviets! But which of our great presidential candidates in ‘08 maybe has some “lost years” when the Communists maybe prepared him for this stealth takeover of the USA? Hmmm? Or should we say, HEHNGHH? MORE »

Let us go where we always go during our Times of National Crisis: to the wingnut comments of our nation’s proud conservative blogs. These people were obviously very angry last night about how this Negroid Monster Obama Staffer nearly murdered the brave 20-year-old white gal from Texas who was working the McCain phone banks in Pittsburgh and only wanted to drive around the scary “Little Italy” neighborhood looking for an ATM but instead drove right to the very heart of the Obama movement, which is a crackhouse full of 15-feet-tall Kenyan monsters who hunt this wretched ghetto looking for McCain bumper stickers, so they can lightly scratch their symbol, a backwards letter “B,” on the cheeks of their Twittering victims. MORE »

John McCain won’t speak at his “Victory Party” on Election Night, the AP just reported. Instead, he’ll “deliver postelection remarks to a small group of reporters and guests on the hotel’s lawn.” Really? This is what your campaign announces 10 days before the election? That you’re such a furious loser that you’ve decided, in advance, to not address your supporters at your Election Night party? MORE »

Are the McCain-Palin people even aware that Tina Fey is making fun of them, all the time? Oh, wait … this is a magazine cover from 2004. Which still doesn’t make any sense. Why, in 2004, did the editors of this (obviously now defunct) magazine decide that the best illustration of the Kerry-Bush race was … a picture of a teevee comic who doesn’t portray either of them, and a guy who was soundly beaten for the GOP nomination four years earlier, in 2000? There is no answer, no “figuring it out.” Just enjoy the random strangeness of Tina Fey mocking McCain on a magazine newspaper-supplement cover four years ago. [Poynter Forums]

New poll! From Pew, the liberal educated poll robot. Likely voters: 53% for Obama, 39% for McCain. The “Other/Don’t Know” crowd is down to 8%, or below the threshold of mattering one way or the other — in the October 9-12 Pew poll, the 9% other/undecideds were enough to erase Obama’s advantage, should they all go for Walnuts. WARNING: This is all just a mindfuck trick to make you stay home and get high on liberal dope, on Election Day, and not go to the polls because, hey, it’s in the tank! [Pew via Sullivan]

SHIFTY EYES, TOO: “Since September, McCain has lost ground on nearly every quality tested in the poll, including lower scores for being likable, decisive, honest, competent, intelligent and inspiring.” [AP-YAHOO]

Do we have to watch this? All the way through? Tragically, the answer is Yes. We must all watch John McCain say “I screwed up” to a late-night comedy host. MORE »

Here’s your new Obama Campaign spot, and it’s got so much bug-eyed weirdness and nervous blinking from McCain! Also, serious policy stuff, what with how Walnuts is always loving Bush Junior. [Gawker]