voting machines
Watch This Voting Machine Hilariously Refuse To Accept A Vote For Barack Obama (Probably Because It Is Racist)
Ahem. I initially selected Obama but Romney was highlighted. I assumed it was being picky so I deselected Romney and tried Obama again, this time more carefully, and still got Romney. Being a software developer, I immediately went into troubleshoot mode. I first thought the calibration was off and tried selecting Jill Stein to actually [...]
We Are Sure These Mysterious Vote Tally Changes In Broward County, Florida, Are No Problem At All
Hey remember the 2000 election, when Florida went to Bush by 538 votes after he got a bunch of rich douchebags to go fake a “riot” outside the Miami-Dade polling headquarters? Well turns out you can avoid all of that unpleasantness if you just change the vote tallies BEFORE the election! Why, just this week, [...]
Looks Like Tagg Romney Has Already Leaked Next Week’s ‘Election’ ‘Results’
It is time, once again, to PANIC! As you can see above, Unskewed Polls has released a new chart that at first blush doesn’t seem to have any basis in reality. So why would they post such a hilarious result? Well, you have not been keeping up with Your Wonkette. Let’s rectify that now! It [...]
Meet Your New Diebold!
Hey, remember when they stole Ohio? Hahaha, yeah, good times. (Here is a quick story explainering the bizarre discrepancies between exit polls, which showed John Kerry winning handily, and the tabulated results, which flipped that. It has the special bonus of world’s greatest pollster Dick Morris musing that since exit polls are like never wrong, [...]
Philly Election Official: Everyone Quit Whining About Voting Problems
Fred Voight, the adorably rosy-cheeked Deputy Election Commissioner of Philadelphia, says that antsy-pantsy voters need to just “get a life” and wait in the rain for hours and hours to vote on a single not-broken machine on election day. And then he’s all, “do not get your knickers in a twist, Philadelphia’s 5-to-1 Democratic, so [...]
Massive Fraudulent CIA-backed Voting Machine Conspiracy in SC
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