Tag Archives: vomit

  We Have Met The Emesis And He Is Us

Stupidest Men On The Internet Just Vomiting Ebola Errrewhere

Hey, it's not ponies...
Stupidest Man in the World Jim Hoft and Stupidest Guest-Blogger in the World Kristinn Taylor have done their part to help Americans concerned about the Texas Ebola case. They cut right through all the facts and medical information out there, and get straight to the screaming fits of panic we’ve all been longing for. On Wednesday, Hoft posted this headline, designed to clearly and calmly inform his readers of the simple facts: “BREAKING>>> Dallas Ebola Patient VOMITED WILDLY Outside Apartment On Way to Hospital.” And then, Thursday, Hoft ran a Taylor story that set some new records for sheer dishonest bullshittery: “What Quarantine?… Photos Show MEN CLEANING TX EBOLA VOMIT Without SUITS!” Read more on Stupidest Men On The Internet Just Vomiting Ebola Errrewhere…
  but what does david lynch think about heineken?

It’s A Happy Nice Time Party Who Could Ask For More?

Hi there. Hiiiiiii. Do you like our new website? One commenter has already sussed out that it is like Buzzfeed but with looser editorial standards and a unicorn-vomit color scheme, which sounds just about exactly right, and pretty much what we were going for, so SUCCESS! Speaking of vomit, the only reason we launched this fershluggineh thing (read, made Lisa launch this thing, and probably also made her cry) was so we could come to Boston and throw a party, which is exactly what we are doing. Say, tomorrow (Saturday) at sixish? READ MORE Read more on It’s A Happy Nice Time Party Who Could Ask For More?…
  ayn rand's adventures in wonderland america 2010

Download a Free Copy of Wonkette’s Ayn Rand Graphic Novel

Did you know It was almost exactly one year ago that Ayn Rand’s Adventures were first released upon this world? One year ago Ayn Rand set out on a 13-part time-traveling adventure filled with political intrigue, mescalin, and vomit. Read more on Download a Free Copy of Wonkette’s Ayn Rand Graphic Novel…
  conservatives who think they're witty

Disgusting Daily Caller Guy Masturbates To Meghan McCain

Tucker Carlson has bagged him his very own humor columnist! Or at least we think so, as the few comments on this article seem to think it’s “brilliant” and “funny.” The Daily Caller’s Jeff Winkler thinks he is a cool person and Meghan McCain is a cool person because they call themselves conservatives and think they appreciate culture, and because they are the only two cool conservatives, they should have gross sex with each other. He calls her “Twitterific” and “beautiful.” And refers to them both as “hipster conservatives.” And this pose in the photo is probably what he looked like when he passed out at a Daily Caller party and Tucker groped him, if such a thing has ever happened. Read more on Disgusting Daily Caller Guy Masturbates To Meghan McCain…
  Ayn Rand's Adventures In Wonderland

Ayn Kampf: The Ayn Rand Omnibus

Like so many great works of fiction — The Canterbury Tales, Macbeth, and Sarah Palin’s Twitter feed — Ayn Rand’s Adventures in Wonderland is not truly understood until one has read the thing dozens, nay, hundreds of times. It may be true that Ayn’s follies are done, but make haste! There is so much pleasure and so much pain to relive in this, your index, of Ayn’s Adventures graphic comic novel. Read more on Ayn Kampf: The Ayn Rand Omnibus…
  Ayn Rand's Adventures In Wonderland

The Headfountain: Ayn Rand In the 21st Century

The third installment of Wonkette’s Ayn Rand journalism comic is here! Vomit along with Ayn, by catching up with our first and second installments … only then will you be prepared for Chapter III. Read more on The Headfountain: Ayn Rand In the 21st Century…
  cartoon violence

Happy Fun Cuddly Cartoon Violence

By the Comics CurmudgeonNormally this feature only brings you terrifying visions of nightmare horror, like rivers of blood and naked Dick Cheney and such. Editorial cartoons are full of these things, because editorial cartoonists think that they’re “edgy,” and much darker and realer than the people who draw, like, Blondie, man. But with so much genuine pain and suffering in the world, we thought maybe we’d take a different tack this week, showing you the lighter side of editorial cartooning, full of love and happiness and adorable critters! Get ready for hugging, after the jump. Read more on Happy Fun Cuddly Cartoon Violence…
  Ayn Rand's Adventures In Wonderland

Future Perfect: Ayn Rand in the 21st Century

It’s the second exciting installment of our new Graphic Novel Comix Adventure, Ayn Rand’s Adventures In Wonderland. (Last week’s episode is here in case you missed it because you were too busy “Goin’ Galt.”) Read more on Future Perfect: Ayn Rand in the 21st Century…
  friday fun link

COMING SOON TO SARAH PALIN’S ‘REAL AMERICAN STORIES': “PHILADELPHIA — A New Jersey man is facing charges after police say he intentionally vomited on an 11-year-old girl and her father in the stands during a Philadelphia Phillies game.” This happens during most Phillies games. The only newsworthy aspect is that the guy (an undercover cop, whoops!) and his daughter didn’t vomit back. [ESPN] Read more on …
  wagg the bog

Henry Paulson Has A Protein Spill, And Say Goodbye To Snail Mail

Remember when America was American as APPLE PIE, when you could call your congressman’s office and enjoy the patriotic vibrations of MICHELE BACHMANN’S iTunes playlist while you were put on hold? Those days are over, because Caliph of the House NANCY PELOSI has decreed strict Sharia law: Henceforth, all music is forbidden in congressional offices, the obvious exception being KENNY G’S “The Moment,” since that was the Mujahideen’s theme song. But if Nancy is so in love with the TALIBAN, why has she trimmed her beard? Curious gossip mongers want to know … Read more on Henry Paulson Has A Protein Spill, And Say Goodbye To Snail Mail…
 

Pentagon Introduces New Vomit Ray

The problem with today’s world is you’ve never got enough interrogators to torture everybody, because there are so many freakin’ people! Luckily, mad scientists at the Pentagon are developing a new Vomit Ray Gun that makes people so nauseous that they fall over and puke. Read more on Pentagon Introduces New Vomit Ray…
 

Rumors On The Internets: Extra Early/Late Edition

* Have ridiculous political views? Dying for attention? Don’t waste time starting a blog — call C-SPAN and loudly hurl insults at Jimmy Carter. [Think Progress] * Brooklyn hipsters who spot Barbara Bush out drinking can’t decide between whether to “vomit on” or “hate fuck” her. [Williamsboard] * Giant pink house conspires with illegal Guatemalans to keep Mitt Romney out of giant White House. [DCeiver] * Bloggers who post their “enemies list” — including recently elected members of Congress who haven’t had a day on the job yet — need to switch to decaf. [The Blogometer] * The Corner bloggers’ had the delusional idea that Rick Santorum will replace Bolton. [The Corner] * Hank Paulson: administration coffin nailer. [Robert Reich] Read more on Rumors On The Internets: Extra Early/Late Edition…
 

Rumors on the Internets: cryingeaglemapleleaf.jpg

North Korean bomb was mad ghetto, their “nuclear scientists are now officially the worst ever.” [Defense Tech] Yup, it’s definitely gonna happen: Stewart-Colbert ’08. [Comedy Central Insider] They’ve got our vote, even if Jon refuses to admit how much he really, really loves us. [Above The Law] Read more on Rumors on the Internets: cryingeaglemapleleaf.jpg…
 

A Slight Whiff of Puke Drives Us Crazy Too

This morning’s Craigslist mailbag offers this gem: You were the passenger in a light blue coupe this past Saturday from DC to route 1 in Crystal City. I was behind you when he stopped at the light and you got out still dressed in Friday evenings attire with your hair looking as if it was in a blender. You quickly bent over and I watched you empty the contents of your stomach all over the corner as the man in the coupe drove off leaving you quite over-dressed in wrinkled attire and some seriously f*cked up hair. Read more on A Slight Whiff of Puke Drives Us Crazy Too…