HOW WOULD YOU KNOW? Hillary says Vladimir Putin “doesn’t have a soul.” [The Australian]

The news spread through Japan and Russia like a firestorm today that Russian President (and soon to be Prime Minister) Vladimir Putin had recorded an instructional judo video with Japanese judo champion Yasuhiro Yamasita. What would that look like? Oh, it’s gonna be good.

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Mitt Romney isn’t so happy with Time’s Person of the Year, Vladimir Putin, getting the title. “He has squelched public dissent and free press. And to suggest that someone like that is the Man of the Year is really disgusting. I’m just appalled.” The would-be Romney Administration looks forward to working with Russia, however. [CNN]

Time’s editors continued their annual assault on reason this morning by selecting Russian frienemy Vladimir Putin as its Person of the Year(tm). Impossible to relate the lameness of this selection; It’s doubtful more than 17% of Time’s readership know who Putin is. And what was so special about him this year? He had awkward dealings with the US and might be leaving power soon? Yeah, that’s what we call “any year.” Why no Rowling? I mean she only wrote about THE BATTLE OF HOGWARTS AND MAGICAL GOBLINS AND… YOU KNOW… COOL SHIT LIKE THAT. No biggie, though. [Time]

So, you’re like the new kid on the country-running block. Must be kinda scary, though I guess it’s cool that your mentor is going to stay on in a limited, minor role to help you out. Loyalty is really important in a man, I mean, world leader, wouldn’t you say? In any case, good luck with running Russia, and I look forward to hearing from you soon. [NY Times, Washington Post]

A long time ago in Russia, old drunken Boris Yeltsin needed somebody to actually run the country, which was kind of a wreck at the time, so he appointed a nice KGB spy named Vladimir Putin to be Prime Minister. Everybody was so pleased with the situation that a few weeks later, Putin became “acting president,” and then there was an “election” which Putin easily won and he has been the Royal President ever since. MORE »

Shinzo Abe announced his retirement today as Japan’s least favorite Prime Minister. Try to read this New York Times description without being reminded of someone: “the nationalist leader whose vision of an unapologetic and strong Japan foundered on scandals, incompetence and gaffes…” Nationalistic? Scandal-ridden? Gafes? That’s right, it sounds just like Russian Prime Minister Mikhail Fradkov.

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When he’s not having his rivals imprisoned or murdered, Russian president Vladimir Putin likes to be photographed inappropriately kissing stuff, like the bellies of little boys. Today, we present this AP photo of Putin kissing a sturgeon.

Russian President Vladimir Putin [AP/Yahoo News]

Remember those creepy half-naked pictures of Vladimir Putin? (Experience them all over again!) The natural reaction to such weird photos of a middle-aged guy with man titties is revulsion, but in crazy Russia the people thought that was the sexiest thing since Stalin showed his thong. MORE »

Vladimir Putin, like so many powerful men before him, is apparently now trolling for love on Craigslist. Maybe he can enjoy a brief fling to end his New Hampshire summer on a high note, far from the prying eyes of the European media. Won’t you look into his soul, and let him make you disappear?

Russian Dictator Seeks Love - 55 [craigslist]

What kind of president is Vladimir Putin? The kind who goes on fishing trips in the wilderness and then strips down for the cameras. Go see the whole photo essay over at Der Spiegel. (UPDATE: And here’s the English version for you English speakers out there.)