vladimir putin

See if you can follow the logic on this one, kids: On Fox’s Hannity Wednesday night, automated mobile grievance unit Allen West suggested that the Fort Hood shootings were the inevitable result of Barack Obama’s failure to recognize that America has international enemies. Now, by the time the program aired, it was pretty clear that […]

Jimmy Fallon’s Vladimir Putin schtick just won’t seem to go away, and so why not add to the pain by adding someone else who just won’t go away? So here’s Sarah Palin, trying out her comedy chops for the sake of plugging her new reality teevee show. Spoiler alert: She actually delivers a funny line […]

Some weeks a mere column cannot contain all the voices that echo through the vast Grand Guignol inside her skull. So Sister Peggy Noonan of the Sisters of Delirium Tremens must take to the pages of the blog that Mr. Murdoch has so graciously provided her at the Wall Street Journal’s website to entertain us […]

We know that bloated completely faded star Steven Seagal thinks of himself as a real-life action figure/spy, what with his training a vigilante posse and such. But did you know he’s also a leading authority on Russia?! In Steven Seagal’s mind he totally is and he loves him some Vladimir Putin, probably because they are […]

Are you fond of traveling to exotic locations and having sexytimes with hookers? Do you drink on the job? Have you recently been to Western Europe and drunk until you passed out in a hotel? Then perhaps you should consider an exciting career protecting the President of the United States as a Secret Service agent! […]

Normally, we rely on our sister site, HappyNiceTimePeople.com, to cover people who are famous for being famous. But every now and then, some no-talent celebrity decides to wade into politics, despite a complete lack of resume and credentials, and we are forced to mock them back to the realm of do-nothingness. Giant-headed moon enthusiast Newt […]

Sweet merciful Yahweh, why is losing loser and oligarchic sex toy Mitt Romney still allowed in front of a working television camera? Is it not horrible enough that we endured that smug mien and faux patrician bearing for all of 2012? We have only just recently recovered from the opium habit we developed over a […]

Listen: Barack Obama has come unstuck in time. The evidence has been building for quite a while, since at least 2009, when he was being blamed for the TARP bank bailout program passed under George W. Bush. As his term progressed, it became clear that Obama was also responsible for the collapse of the housing […]

Hiya, Wonketeers! Do you know what Vladimir Putin’s annexation of the Crimea means for the New Russian Century? We do not, we are a peen-joke blog, so we rely on experts to expertlain it to us. Whaddaya got, Maureen Dowd? Obama wears mom jeans, blah, blah Hillary 2016? No, too 2008. How about you, William […]

It sure is a good thing that politics stops at the water’s edge, because otherwise this Mitt Romney pouting in the Wall Street Journal sure would be controversial, since basically he tells America that we really screwed up bad by choosing such a terrible president who is decidedly not Mitt Romney. You see, were it […]

Just in case you were worried that we hadn’t heard enough stupid ideas from the Git Tuff On Roosha wing of the GOP, Ted Cruz weighed in Monday with his own suggestions for what could be done about Russia’s invasion of Crimea: Instead of just imposing wimpy mom-jean sanctions on Russia, how about going full […]

The sun shone for an hour later every day now, and with it the renewed energy of springtime. Sister Peggy Noonan of the Order of Glenlivet With a Splash of Water sat in her favorite saloon, examining the numerous tiny plastic swords, usually used for spearing martini olives but now olive-free and scattered all around […]

If there’s anything SNL does brilliantly, it’s movie parodies. And political sketches! And political movie sketches with a tough-guy monologue you remember from the trailer because you didn’t even have to see the movie, but here is Liam Neeson delivering another version of it anyway, and not even looking very embarrassed about the whole thing! […]

CPAC Straw Poll winner Rand Paul proved his serious leadership mojo Sunday, telling Fox News Sunday host Chris Wallace that if he were president, he knows exactly what he’d do in response to Russia’s invasion of Crimea: “I would do something differently from the president,” Paul said. “I would immediately get every obstacle out of […]

Hello! Still bleary-eyed from losing that hour of sleep? Us too! We’re going to blame that for any missteps in this week’s Sunday Times roundup. First off, of course, is the big exciting political news that beloved conervative bullyboy icon Rand Paul won the CPAC straw poll, which means soon he will be your president, […]