Tag: vietnam

Donald Trump Thinks His Supporters Are Cowards Who Are Too Scared To Tell Pollsters They Love Him. SAD!

The delicate flowers cannot handle the hypothetical judgment of a disembodied voice conducting a phone survey, he says.
Arlington National Cemetery on Memorial Day

We Are Now, As Ever, At War With Eastasia. Happy Memorial Day From Yr Wonkette.

We originally ran this post for Memorial Day 2015. It's a lovely read, so we decided it should be reposted this year. The Washington Post has pulled together a sobering chart that allows readers to determine what percentage of their...

Barack Obama’s Excellent South Asian Vacation!

Barack Obama is wrapping up his gnarly Vietnamese vacation. Wish we were there!

Now Ted Cruz Fancies Himself A Kennedy, Like John Or Paul Or Ringo Maybe

Ted Cruz believes he is many things: the reincarnation of Ronald Reagan; spokesman for Israel and all the Jewishes; an Ivy League-trained master debater genius wunderkind; and Jesus Christ hisself. Now he's adding Great Conservative Republican Hero John (?) Kennedy to...

‘Democrat’ Jim Webb Pretty Sure It’s CNN’s Fault He’s Not Going To Be President

Hey, all you-all, let's all point and laugh at this crybaby loser dick-mold Jim Webb boo-hooing all over himself because he losered the Democratic debate on Tuesday night: “It was rigged in terms of who was going to get time...
Time isn't holding up. Time isn't after us

Ticking Time Bomb Jim Webb Would Like To Be President Of Vietnam Flashbacks

"Democrat" Jim Webb came off kind of creepy in the Democratic debate Tuesday, and it wasn't just when he talked about that time he killed a guy, though that didn't help. Like, not quite "You know he fucked underaged prostitutes...
I CAN SAY TERRISM YET?

Fox News Has Thoughts On Kim Davis. They Are Strangely Interesting Thoughts!

So, the other day, we showed you a video of a nice panel discussion on the Fox News, about how Kentucky clerk Kim Davis's lawyer Mat Staver is "ridiculously stupid," and we remarked that when a wingnut has lost...
myfriends, my friends, my friends..FIVE AND A HLAF YEARS, ALAN!

Wingnut Heroes To Arrest John McCain For Doing Bad Things

A rightwing radio talker has announced what's sure to be a turning point in the movement to restore constitutional something-or-other to the taking-back of America, and also the freedom and such as, for our once-great nation, hooray! Calling the...
No grown-up Supreme Court juice for you!

Here’s Your Badass Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Doing Gay Stuff In Vietnam

We've all been wondering what Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg -- AKA The Notorious R.B.G., AKA the biggest baddest Supreme Court superhero to ever don a robe -- has been doing ever since she did her part to do gay marriage to the entire...
We're guessing Perry looked a bit like this delivering his remarks.

Dumb Rick Perry To Dumb Donald Trump: MEEEEEE-OW! SCRATCH! HISS!

Guess former Texas governor and current GOP clown car rumble seat occupant Rick Perry doesn't like being called the second biggest stupid in the world, just behind Sen. Lindsey Graham. In a speech delivered Wednesday to some cohort of...
Who ya got?

Donald Trump YOOOOGE Fan Of God And Those Little Jesus Crackers

We have been so busy LOLing and WTFing over Donald Trump's attack on John McCain for being a fake war hero, with his weak-assed POWing, because Trump "like people that weren’t captured," that we almost forgot to tell you...

John McCain Graciously Refuses To Tell Donald Trump To F*ck Himself In The Ear

Did you hear the one about how Donald Trump thinks John McCain is a L-O-S-E-R for getting captured and held as a prisoner of war that one time, in the Nam, for five and a half years? Of course...
WHO ME?

Donald Trump Defeats Soviet Union, Builds Vietnam Memorial With His Bare Hands

Donald "I'm Donald Trump" Trump is basically the most amazing man who has ever lived, which you should already know by now, and if you don't you are an idiot because he tells us every day how amazing he...
Arlington National Cemetery on Memorial Day

We Are Now, As Ever, At War With Eastasia. Happy Memorial Day From Yr Wonkette.

  While the editorial "we" is house style at Wonkette, we will use the less-pretentious "I" for the duration of this post, because we can occasionally turn the snark off, we swear. Starting now. The Washington Post has pulled together a...
Damn dirty longhairs

Musicians Dishonor Troops, Make The Baby Jesus Bald Eagle Cry

Did everyone catch the terrible Concert for Valor to honor our military veterans last night? We say it was terrible because some of the musicians took it upon themselves to dishonor the troops, the flag, the bald eagle, Mom,...
Welcome to America; here's your bureaucratic nightmare

John Oliver: Congratulations, You Get To Come To America. Or Not. (Video)

Update/followup: See end of post for a chance to do some good, or at least try to. After a week off, John Oliver is back in crusading investigative comedy mode again, as Last Week Tonight brings us this story on...