Utah
Did you know? Some of Mitt Romney’s best friends own coal mines! Especially the kind that collapse and kill six workers and three (would-be) rescuers after years and years of reports and fines for unsafe work places. (The Mine Safety And Health Administration is tyranny, everyone knows that.) And that is why this coal-magnate dude [...]
As Utah goes, so goes … well, not that many other states really. Bit of an outlier, that one, with their 35 percent 2008 Bammerz vote, and their million wives each, and their habit of actually paying for porn. But in an actually surprising move, a near-supermajority of Utahans want their governor to veto last [...]
Proving just how good sweet, sweet censorship can be, Utah’s Legislature has passed new statewide sex-ed rules that ban teachers from discussing contraception, premarital sex, and teh Ghey, even when directly asked by “the children.” Perhaps Utah, “The Land of the Saints,” is emulating the smashing success of the “Don’t Say Gay” rules in Michele [...]
Don’t be surprised to see a statement next week from six-term Utah Senator Orrin Hatch that he is leaving office “to spend more time with [his] undersea Holocaust-victim baptizing chamber.” DON’T BELIEVE THE HYPE, as Orrin’s favorite old-timey band used to say!!! Hatch is likely to be effectively drummed out of office in the state’s [...]
Here’s some more awkward humor from the robot comedy that is Mitt Romney’s 2012 ascent to the GOP nomination: Mittens actually did worse on Saturday in the Nevada GOP caucus than he did back in 2008. This time around, “Inevitable Willard” got 50.1%, or a little less than his winning total back in the 2008 [...]
A shrieking horde of Tea Partiers (they do not come in any other format) stormed the National Republican Senatorial Committee offices demanding that it stop supporting GOP senators, which is its job. HOH NOH, we do not want your terrible “moderate Republicans,” they cried, especially this disgusting old Orrin Hatch person. (Haha, Hatch is a [...]
Did you hear about liberal hate site “Groupon” sponsoring the racist Donald Trump’s racism? Groupon, you’re fired! What’s next? How about those liberals at the Mormon university? Yeah, how about them? A guy who makes prints of Jesus and the GOP Presidents and the Troops has pulled his precious artworks from the Mormon Church-owned Brigham [...]
Former Utah governor and current Ambassador to China Jon Huntsman is going to run for the Republican nomination for president, just as he always has been, basically. He will wait until this spring, because like every potential GOP presidential candidate, he hates giving the political Internet pageviewz. Huntsman’s campaign staff will basically be John McCain [...]
Dugway Proving Ground, a massive Army base in Utah along the border with Nevada, has been under lockdown for many hours now because of some kind of “national terror alert” to “resolve security issues.” Dugway is a bioweapons lab and supposedly home to secret military aerial projects. More than 6,300 sheep died near the proving [...]
The Washington City Paper‘s new “The Sexist” blogger, Dave Weigel, has a profile out on Jason Chaffetz, the “proto-Tea Party” freshman Republican Congressman from Utah who is poised to head the Federal Workforce, Postal Service, and the District of Columbia Subcommittee of the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee. That’s actually sort of funny, because [...]
Woah man, Orrin Hatch was in Hatch. It was like he became a town, and then watched as he walked around inside of himself. And then the Whippets stopped playing funny games with his mind. [The Hill]
We all know that Orrin Hatch loves Judaism and singing about his favorite holiday, Hanukkah. But apparently he loves all other religions too. And thus he supports the rights of Muslims to build a community center in Manhattan, if they want to, he said in an interview with a Utah Fox affiliate. No biggie. “And [...]
Glenn Beck came to Salt Lake City to talk about the Jesus and the America and the Socialism for a stadium spectacular and confided in the crowd of idiots who paid money to see their favorite radio and teevee person that he is maybe going to be blind. “Only Glenn Beck could make a crowd [...]
