Tag: unions

He may or may not get to have a word with the Framers about original intent.

Dead Scalia Already Making America Great Again

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia's corpse has not been rotting long enough for us to miss him yet because that's never going to happen, even if we live for a thousand years. But his death is already having some wondrous consequences...

Who Will Save The Babies Now That Antonin Scalia Is Roasting In Hell?

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia (or "Anthony" Scalia if you are a moron, like Michele Bachmann) died Saturday night, when his heart quite suspiciously up and quit, as if a 79-year-old with health problems suddenly dying out of the blue is even...
Sounds like he needs to SPLAIN some things to his campaign.

Uh Oh, Bernie Sanders Campaign Being Very Naughty In Nevada

Bad news, everybody, but the Bernie Sanders campaign seems to be doing dirty tricks. Stop doing dirty tricks, Bernie Sanders campaign! Operatives from Bernie Sanders' campaign have donned Culinary union pins and secured access to employee areas inside Strip hotels...
Same image is also captioned with 'We are the radical leftists of the NEA. And we have your kids!' Gotta love the internet.

Supreme Court Fixing To Strangle Uppity Public Worker Unions Dead, Maybe

Big things at the Supreme Court Monday, with oral arguments in a case that could do Seriously Bad Things to public sector unions. If the plaintiffs in Friedrichs v. California Teachers Association win, unions representing public workers could "lose tens...
Hey, what do I know?

Dumb A-Hole Scott Walker Not Going To Be President, Just Like We Told You

Recall, if you will, the puppy days of summer, when we told you dumb a-hole Scott Walker was not going to be president. We had many fine reasons at the time, like how nobody was impressed that he's traveled...
Bringin' back the good old days

Scott Walker Revives Campaign With Promise To Bring Back Sweatshops

Scott Walker -- described, in an edition of the Encyclopedia Galactica that conveniently fell through a rift in the time-space continuum from 1000 years in the future, as "a mindless jerk who was first against the wall when the revolution came" -- has a...

Labor Day: Why You Get To Day-Drink Like A Blogger Today!

BREAKING: Labor Day was not named for women squirting fully baked fetuses out of their hoo-has because hahahaha celebrating women is a silly notion. Labor Day actually celebrates workers, as in unions, as in the people who are constantly trying to...
Or maybe some Foster Friess?

Scott Walker Says Minimum Wage Is ‘Lame,’ Poor People Grody To the Max

Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker wants the electorate to know that he'll be the bestest president ever for workers, because unlike the dumb old Democrats, he refuses to give a shit about the minimum wage, which is barely worth even...
Hmm, yeah, still not funny

Democrats Betray Obama On Trade Deal, Guess He’s Done Being President Now

Looks like President Barry H. Bamz is officially in lame duck season, because on Friday, House Democrats stabbed him right in the back -- they also betrayed, rejected, revolted, and rebelled! -- blocking a bill to allow him to...
Nice minimum wage job you got here. Shame if something was to happen to it.

Walmart Training Video Will Scare You Away From Evil Mean Unions Forever

Here is a terrifying anti-union video, mandatory viewing for all new Walmart employees, and designed to warn the Walmart neophyte away from those scary union organizers who are trying to lure unsuspecting "associates" into their evil schemes. As propaganda,...
Not an exact rendering of the Senate cafeteria.

Senate Cafeteria Cook Is On Food Stamps, Must Be One Of Those Moochers GOP Always Talks About

There is a piece in The Guardian written by Bertrand Olotara, one of the many service workers who ensures that Congress even HAS a place in which to grandstand, or alternately, sit around and do nothing. Olotara is a cook...
Looks the same going in and going out!

Taco Bell To Congress: Here’s 6,000 Free Tacos, Now Help Us Screw Our Workers

At first this story will seem like a Nice Time, but it is not, so stop smiling and definitely stop making plans to have a serious craving for Taco Bell when you are stoned or drunk later. Taco Bell...
Yes, it's 'shopped

Scott Walker Signs ‘Right To Work’ Law So Wisconsin Can Have Fewer Rights At Work

Scott Walker signed a "Right To Work" bill into law Monday, ensuring that employees won't have to submit to oppressive union membership, higher wages, safer workplaces, and job security anymore. Wisconsin is now the 25th state with a right-to-work...

The Weekend Stock Photo Report Will End The Internet As We Know It

In this installment of The Weekend Stock Photo Report with Weekend S. Photo, the DHS fight goes to overtime, Scott Walker is misunderstood except not really, and the conservative freakout over net neutrality is totally precedented. Missed last week's report?...
ISIS is pretty much just a teacher's union with rocket propelled grenades, after all

Scott Walker Knows How To Beat ISIS: Slash Their Pension Benefits

In his speech to CPAC Thursday night, Scott Walker let America know that he's ready to handle international relations without wasting any time on diplomacy, explaining how his experience in crushing public-employee unions makes him the perfect choice to...
Look closely at the fear in Vladimir's eyes.

Hello! I, Vladimir Putin, Am Preparing To Surrender Mother Russia To Scott Walker

Greetings of day to you, illiterate Western scum! I, Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin, am happy to make speaking to you again here on Wonkette dot com! You have all recovered from watching of decadent movie award show, yes? Very political...