undecided voters

PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEEEE 3:28 pm October 23, 2012

Walking Morality Tale Lindsay Lohan Really Milking This Whole Undecided ‘Voter’ Thing

You guys, Lindsay Lohan just does NOT know what to do about this whole “presidential race” thing, and it is seriously stressing her out! Earlier this month chronically underemployed former child star Lindsay Lohan said she was supporting Mitt Romney because “employment is really important right now,” but Politico reports that on Monday she retweeted [...]

IT TAKES A PANEL OF DOZENS TO ACT LIKE HACKS 11:35 am October 23, 2012

Fox News Convenes Post-Debate Panel Of Snippy Idiots; Foofaraw Ensues

by Jesse Taylor

Fox News once again hired ruddy shitmonster Frank Luntz to convene a panel of undecided voters who watch Fox News (read: Romney voters who want to be on Fox News). There is video (as the kids are saying, “after the fold”). Fox Nation describes this as “Luntz Focus Group Erupts Into Near Brawl,” but it [...]

THE UNBEARABLE LIGHTNESS OF BEING 11:30 am October 8, 2012

We Genocided The Indians And Enslaved The Slaves So Man-Child Could Live With Parents And Whine About Voting

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Happy Columbus Day, Merkins! Are you so grateful to be a citizen of the US-of-A on this, the day we commemorate how we came over and righteously kicked some Injun ass? How about if you knew we had given our righteous ass-kickings so terrible man-children could live in their parents’ garage apartments, decline full time [...]

THE NEW YORK TIMES IS ON IT 5:17 pm August 9, 2012

Exclusive NYT Interview Indicates That Undecided Voters May Despise Politics Entirely

by Jim Newell

The New York Times ventured out of the Big City to conduct one of its most ambitious anthropological studies of the election, deep into the virgin forests of Ohio. Veteran Timesman John Harwood was tasked with a mission that no cub reporter would ever have returned from alive: Talking to some lady in Ohio about [...]

SEND THEM ALL TO FRANCE 9:32 am October 30, 2008